Without Self-confidence Because Of Poverty

   Nepukism, girl! Don't think so :).

   You are talking about an inner, emotional problem, not that you are poor. You do not feel ok with your appearance, maybe more inside than what you see in the mirror, that is, you see what you feel, and maybe not cold facts-reality. And obviously around / among colleagues you become more complex. This is how I perceive what is written and I will comment accordingly. Let's say that appearance would improve your inner world, it doesn't depend on money, it has nothing to do with poverty. I know a rich complex and look like crocodiles simply because they have no sense of aesthetics or are lost in the effort to be above others, they look like cartoons. Imagine a 54-year-old woman with a very short skirt, an awful lot of make-up emphasizing all the wrinkles, under the skirt the thin skin sways like a torn curtain ... but she believes it is irresistible. A man of about 50 who wears tight cigarette jeans shirt for over 500 euros, so funny ... but it is also considered naltrazim. We chat with them alone. I know a 24-year-old girl who wears second-hand clothes. She makes them, dresses in the style of "sporty-elegant" light, emphasizing makeup, not taking away from its own essence ... she is the favorite of a huge team, well, she has "devils" but she is jealous. So, start with scissors, a needle and a thread-remaking of old clothes. Change makeup. Tousle your hair, smile. Come out smiling, .. you will immediately notice the reactions to the external beautiful radiation, a consequence of only a slight travel of the necessary hormones, even with a forced smile at the beginning. Try it! a consequence of only a slight travel of the necessary hormones, albeit with a forced smile at the beginning. Try it! a consequence of only a slight travel of the necessary hormones, albeit with a forced smile at the beginning. Try it!

   Heeeey, get her tight! What are these worries and this "shame"? From what you have written, I understand that you have no excuses to be ashamed! I will not tell you that it is important to be alive and healthy, or whether it is normal or not, but I will tell you that we are all people on this earth! Everyone at least once in their life has fallen into sadness, joy, etc. These acquaintances of yours or whatever are there, from whom you are ashamed not to think that they do not have any (small or big) problems now .... maybe tomorrow they appear ... in a week, a month, a year ... You need a strong will! Know that sooner or later with faith in yourself you will achieve a lot! Do not like things negatively, but look at them positively! That shame threw it in a trash can and took the best out of you and kept it forever ... without losing it! I wish you a lot of success and most of all HONEST SMILE!

   Well, don't they, as your colleagues, take as much as your salary?

   The author I assumed that I would receive "positive" comments, in which there is nothing wrong, on the contrary, but ... most people do not share this way of thinking (such as n. 3 for example). This is the reality, this is the problem. And yes, I know it's internal, I know I may not care, but I also know it's normal to feel that way. I'm generally in the mood - one moment I don't care, the next - just the opposite. to 4, my colleagues are in other positions, but that's not the point, I don't go into details why and how, before they were classmates, tomorrow will be other colleagues, and, yes, "tomorrow" may be different, but I live now and I want to solve this problem, and it is that it affects my self-esteem a lot when I see a difference between me and others.

   Hello, Author. I come from a very poor family and around the age of 27 I was very poor because I studied and worked. In general, I will not lie to you - there is no "method" to free a person from their complexes and especially from the inability to share life outside. One method I found for myself, however, is not to get complicated - to be terribly angry and motivated with teeth and nails to strive to get rid of poverty. Whoever tells you that a poor man is a happy man is lying to you. They are cut off from many opportunities, even from access to education, healthcare, transport and all sorts of other basic things. I realized at the age of 14-15 how poor I was and how much it hindered my life. Since then, it took me about 10-12 years to climb up and my goal was not wealth, but just a middle life - ours as a guaranteed roof over my head, not to think about the bill for electricity, heating, water, food, insurance. I just wanted to achieve this, but I was obviously so excited that I achieved much more and today I can call myself a wealthy person with a clear conscience. As a poor woman, I had the greatest fear that I might get pregnant and give birth in poverty, dooming my children. This is risk number 1 especially for us women. If you become a poor mother, you will look after poor children and you will die in poverty, and that is why I have protected myself from unwanted pregnancies above all. My second goal was to get an education that guaranteed me employment and a decent salary. That is, I did not study what I was interested in or in which I was the best or it ended easily, but exclusively what I knew would feed me. Third, but not least, I've always looked at what kind of people I'm dating and what kind of man I'm going out with. I haven't seen treasures, but I have made sure that my friends are educated people who can behave in society and that I can learn something from them both in behavior and in culture, because I come from a poor and rural family. I also carefully chose the man next to me. I was alone for a long time, but I never went out with simpletons, rascals, mother's sons, alcoholics and miserable people, because along with the unwanted pregnancy and the wrong man can destroy everything a woman has achieved. For me, in a nutshell, the idea, the goal of getting rid of poverty, did not leave me time and energy to complex and self-flagellate. I had a colleague at the university who was as poor as I was, but she gave all her money for branded clothes with the idea of ​​being almost discriminated against by other colleagues, and of finding a good man. She once lectured me on how I dressed and nonsense, but I played it and in the end it didn't end, I went with a Turk who dumped it, and I finished, realized and I have a wonderful husband. The most important thing is to be tidy. If you are clean, tidy, your poverty will never be so obvious. Also learn to do your own hair, makeup. I have been coloring my own hair since I was 17 and today I even do it myself, because I don't often like how hairdressers work, and I get nervous about staying at a hairdresser for 3-4 hours. Also decent makeup, not much, but to look maintained. However, do not try to cover up poverty by drinking or going to places that are not for you or buying things that you cannot afford. Also, don't eat out, because even fast food and patties can lure you in, and you can spend that money on really important things like culture and education, saving or paying your bills. I simply did not personally go to the cinema or restaurants, but I knew where and when there were cheap or free cultural events in my city - for example, there was an open-air theater for 3-5 levs, there are many free concerts in the summer and I had no money to I go to other places, I adjusted my life so much that I had a way to be at these events, and there were all kinds of wonderful people, well-read people. It is also free to go to the library and dig for hours - you will also meet interesting people. It is free to walk in the park. You take a coffee from a machine for 30 cents and drink your coffee in the best atmosphere. I tried to enjoy the free things - free time, nature, meeting nice people outside. It's free and ... the church. I became a member of a church community at one time without being very pious, just because people were cool. After church we cleaned the temple and went to a pastry shop, and I had no money for a cake and spat on a coffee for 2 hours, but we had great conversations and had a great time, and then walked around with others, entered galleries and museums. In short, if you are poor, you need to have information about a free way to establish social contacts and experiences, because I will not lie to you - it's all money. I have money today, but I don't have that much free time. I recently came across an ad for a free student concert at a nearby church and told myself I was going to go, but at 300 dawn I succeeded, simply because I couldn't distribute my time as I used to. Being poor also has advantages - you have more free time. And yet - you have nothing to lose. That is, you are mobile, you can experiment with many things, and when you already have a standard of living as "petrified", because you always try not to lose what you have achieved and you always have a burden on your head, but I still recommend this burden to everyone. To think that you can be poor and happy all your life is foolish. Only a young person can make it cool despite poverty. After 30 somewhere there is a tragedy and annoying. Honestly, self-confidence has always given me the idea that my poverty is temporary. I also had some positive thoughts in my head. It's hard, you know, but if you don't aim to get out of this situation, complexes will be your least problem. With age come greater responsibilities and challenges that a poor person simply cannot meet. because you always try not to lose what you have achieved and you always have a burden on your head, but I still recommend this burden to everyone. To think that you can be poor and happy all your life is foolish. Only a young person can make it cool despite poverty. After 30 somewhere there is a tragedy and annoying. Honestly, self-confidence has always given me the idea that my poverty is temporary. I also had some positive thoughts in my head. It's hard a lot, you know, but if you don't set a goal to get out of this situation, complexes will be your least problem. With age come greater responsibilities and challenges that a poor person simply cannot meet. because you always try not to lose what you have achieved and you always have a burden on your head, but I still recommend this burden to everyone. To think that you can be poor and happy all your life is foolish. Only a young person can make it cool despite poverty. After 30 somewhere there is a tragedy and annoying. Honestly, self-confidence has always given me the idea that my poverty is temporary. I also had some positive thoughts in my head. It's hard, you know, but if you don't aim to get out of this situation, complexes will be your least problem. With age come greater responsibilities and challenges that a poor person simply cannot meet. that all your life you can be poor and happy is stupid. Only a young person can make it cool despite poverty. After 30 somewhere there is a tragedy and annoying. Honestly, self-confidence has always given me the idea that my poverty is temporary. I also had some positive thoughts in my head. It's hard a lot, you know, but if you don't set a goal to get out of this situation, complexes will be your least problem. With age come greater responsibilities and challenges that a poor person simply cannot meet. that all your life you can be poor and happy is stupid. Only a young person can make it cool despite poverty. After 30 somewhere there is a tragedy and annoying. Honestly, self-confidence has always given me the idea that my poverty is temporary. I also had some positive thoughts in my head. It's hard, you know, but if you don't aim to get out of this situation, complexes will be your least problem. With age come greater responsibilities and challenges that a poor person simply cannot meet. you know, but if you don't set a goal to get out of this situation, complexes will be your least problem. With age come greater responsibilities and challenges that a poor person simply cannot meet. you know, but if you don't set a goal to get out of this situation, complexes will be your least problem. With age come greater responsibilities and challenges that a poor person simply cannot meet.

   There is only one method - to realize that self-esteem has nothing to do with your appearance. Well, you don't realize it - so for self-confidence you need cool clothes, and for them - a better salary. And what are you doing about it? Are you planning to develop? Do you have goals in life? You have a problem with yourself, darling, and it's not your confidence. Good luck with the realization!

   I don't understand what your problem is. Start a second job on the weekends. Or go abroad to make money. There is always a way out if you look for it. Money is the smallest problem. Because they earn and spend. You didn't set out to win them, just. And they rightly told you to be happy that you are young and healthy. This is the real treasure. You will appreciate it when you lose it. So he's looking for a second job.

   From the author I told you, there is a reason (more precisely reasons) for my poor financial situation. They are valid, but I do not want to discuss them, or whether there are ways to change the situation, what they are, etc. I am a little older than I tried to look - well - I'm 26. I may have tried everything, I may have been much more mature even at the age of 26, I may not always have been healthy and I may know and realize more than you think. And the reasons may indeed be valid. Please comment as if you know that this is indeed the case (since there is no way to prove it here). Thanks to everyone who took or will take the time to read my question and answer me, but what I need now is to be able to prevent myself from losing my self-confidence in THESE circumstances. That's my goal at this point in my life, and yes,

   First, you want confidence to come out of nowhere. You don't have hobbies or have fun, obviously you don't have many friends. Well, you don't have a social contact that will give you different perspectives and technologies of communication. There is no thrill of communication. By communicating more closely with other people, one gains from their manners, gains from their "technologies" for dealing with situations. In one situation, one jokes, another takes it seriously, a third ignores it, and so on. Any options. Second, I will speak from my experience: I also had very low self-esteem. I come from a very poor family. Literally (I'm not exaggerating) there were periods when we ate bread and salt. I am NOT exaggerating, as I said. Huge family quarrels over money, quarrels, threats, etc. Stress. I decided that my life would be different and that I would be financially secure. So I became a programmer and I make good money. The thing is that if I hadn't come across a certain literature, I would still be wearing ugly jeans for BGN 10. It's just that I've been planted since I was a child - the cheapest of the second use is taken and I wore it. It is seen to be profitable, not to be liked by a person. However, through awareness, one understands that one does not like it. He also understands that he has the opportunity to buy something he likes. Develops taste and style. Third, to the top point: Clothes or anything else you buy don't have to be expensive. You need to like it. To feel good about it and to suit your taste. When you feel good about the things you buy, your self-esteem automatically rises. I have a girlfriend who buys almost entirely second-hand, but she is extremely stylish. In one of the posts you write that at one point you don't care, and in the other, just the opposite. Well, it's a depressive condition that comes from a lack of experience. I know because I've had it (and still have it), especially in long periods of stagnation. With no movement and no experience, the brain (mind) itself seeks topics through which to entertain itself. Invent imaginary problems and enemies. And when you have experiences, the brain is involved in them and there is no time for a lot of side nonsense.

   from 6, but I think in my comment I wrote you many things about how I managed to do it well then and it is exactly in the style of No. 10 - look for ways to communicate with good people, but LONG-TERM poverty will crush you and there will be no what can I lie to you that it is not so. If a person is healthy, there is always a way out, by the way. For me, only the sick, children, pensioners and the disabled have a good reason to be poor, but here you decide whether to fight. Good luck

   I am a 27 year old boy. I don't have a good income, even a meager one, but that doesn't stop me from having a lot of self-confidence. Sometimes I see myself with more money, but they don't stay long. They immediately go to people who need it. Somehow I don't like it when I have a lot of money. When I get my meager salary, which is a little below the minimum, which will even end soon, because it is a euro project, I also receive a minimum pension because I have epilepsy, I just pay the bills, the rest I already calculate well how to get my money. Like you, I wear old clothes, but I don't think that's a shame. If it is not torn, there is no problem. I study at a private university, where it is full of mother's children and many of these mother's children do not wear branded clothes. An example is my jacket, which is probably already 7 years old, but it is not torn, it is not worn and I wear it. Even sometimes rich boys and girls envy me that with this meager income, I am happy with life, I do not think of fleeing abroad, determined to stay here, always cheerful, smiling, I do not care that anyone has ever commented on my clothes , for my shoes ... I have good friends, I have a roof over my head, I have been supporting myself since I was 19, I don't need my parents, I don't look for them and that makes me happy to be independent. Not everyone can be independent, not everyone can support themselves. I'm not looking for them and that makes me happy to be independent. Not everyone can be independent, not everyone can support themselves. I'm not looking for them and that makes me happy to be independent. Not everyone can be independent, not everyone can support themselves.

   Author, how do you want to change the situation with self-confidence by refusing to change anything else in yourself and around you? A person has self-confidence only among equal people, and accordingly, if you are only among the richer, smarter, most people, you have nothing to stand out in, where your self-confidence comes from. Look at the gypsies sweeping the streets, if they didn't have their girlfriends and neighbors, their equals in the Roma neighborhood, they would also feel crushed. But they have self-confidence because in their free time and at work they are surrounded by people who are in their hall. If such a Roma woman lived in a block among Bulgarians or would look for a way to grow / if she could not at least educate herself, at least they would be equal to the Bulgarians / or they would live like you with crushed self-confidence. As long as you don't have achievements, as long as you don't fight for achievements, you can't have self-confidence, especially when you are surrounded by people who are struggling to achieve goals. An acquaintance of mine, like you, wore old clothes and shoes, but she had goals to pay for an apartment, there were stupid people to call her a rag in her face, but she achieved her goal, so she had self-confidence because the woman who called her a rag was actually divorced. with a child and lived with her parents, and an acquaintance of mine was fighting for her family for her child to buy a house. Today my acquaintance has already paid for the apartment and set new goals, and she is in the same hall, guess who has more self-confidence. but she had goals to pay for an apartment, there were stupid people to call her the rag in her face, but she achieved her goal and so she had self-confidence, because the woman who called her the rag was actually divorced with a child and lived with her parents, and my acquaintance he fought for his family for his child to buy a house. Today my acquaintance has already paid for the apartment and set new goals, and she is in the same hall, guess who has more self-confidence. but she had goals to pay for an apartment, there were stupid people to call her the rag in her face, but she achieved her goal and so she had self-confidence, because the woman who called her the rag was actually divorced with a child and lived with her parents, and my acquaintance he fought for his family for his child to buy a house. Today my acquaintance has already paid for the apartment and set new goals, and she is in the same hall, guess who has more self-confidence.

   I'm the author Even if I have goals, people can't know that. They see only my clothes, and colleagues - word for word understand about my lifestyle. In general, I'm not one of those people who sucks from their fingers what to complex about and who always wants to look in the best light, etc ... But the fact that I do not meet the "idea" of a person my age - this it complicates me, at least because it attracts attention. 12, it's nice to have friends. I only have one. Sometimes we go out, but his mother doesn't like me because she thinks I'm exposing him (she has hinted at him many times).

   Hi, I'm a girl from a family that isn't wealthy either. I am 23 at the moment. I have known the value of money since I was a child, and even if I did, I don't spend it on nonsense. However, I can say that I dress more than well and much wealthier girls admire me. I also had low self-esteem when I was younger. At school I wore very simple clothes that I rarely changed and everyone saw it. In general, when I was about 17 years old. I became interested in fashion and bought second-hand clothes. There are great stores, now online, where you can get original clothes for funny money .... The other thing is to know how to combine them and what works well for you. It sounds very elemental, but to this day I dress from there and everyone compliments me. I recommend renix. bg, katonovi, unico, drehata, etc. Other, what I can suggest is to change your clothes. On a simple one-color T-shirt, if you stick from such modern emblems, stickers (they cost BGN 2, 4 pieces in Chinese stores) you will have a great fashionable T-shirt. You can sew beads. There are so many variants that I won't have 2 days to list. The question is how much you want it and what you do about it. Success!

   Bill Gates said that if you are born poor, it is NOT your fault, but if you die, it is poor. Think hard and as long as you justify yourself and grumble. If not, become like the muffins-holders and look for a rich man, then only you will suffer. You, if you know, how hard my life was, but I didn't break. Unless you are disabled, you have no good reason to say that you cannot change your social status. It is not easy, but it is achievable. Good things are not easy!

   From 12- Not many of my friends, but better that way. His mother may not like you, but what matters is what he thinks, how he evaluates you. To have one, but to be real, because some have many, but they are not his real friends. Follow your goals once you have them. Money is not everything in the world. I may not have money, but I think I am richer than a lot of people who constantly carry thousands in their pockets. However, they do not have the qualities that I possess. It's the same for you. You must have good qualities that a rich man dreams of having.

   by author 16, if my posts sounded like an excuse and a grumble, it's because I asked one question and you answered another. I did not ask if it was possible to change my "social status" but my self-esteem in the current circumstances. And it's not about who knows what self-confidence without coverage, but simply not to appear this shame and complex. And it's most true that I look "weird" - and it's not just about looks, I know I can change it, but also in conversations with colleagues or new acquaintances.

   n 6 I am, it is not true that people do not know if you have goals and interests. It is obvious who is grumbling, lazy and shredding and who has interests and goals - at least in all your behavior, organization of the day, everyone close and familiar will know that you are hardworking, motivated and have some dreams. In addition, self-confidence is an inner feeling and has nothing to do with others - YOU will know that you have goals and interests. That's enough. You are crushed by the current situation, because you obviously have no idea how to get out, nor do you make any special efforts to do so, except to blame others for looking at the clothes and the like. Both I and the others have told you how we have dealt more or less with problems such as clothes, but you are still looking for someone to tell you a mantra, almost from tomorrow, to have self-confidence. Well, it doesn't happen that way and one has to take stock of one's life, get angry and act. No one will take you by the hand and give you confidence or goals in life

   to 19 by the author "self-esteem is an inner feeling and has nothing to do with others" That's right, so maybe I didn't use the right word. But in my topic I explained what the problem is - I'm ashamed that they will think I'm weird. Dumb, but it affects me. Until 12/17 - thanks for the positive comments.

   And a question to n. 6/19. For example, I go to a course (language, real case). There I meet the others, but I will not tell the whole biography, even if I share my goals, etc. This is what I am talking about.

   From 6/19 - why be weird? In our country, unfortunately, 40% of people are poor and not even an exception. The exception is not being poor. I studied at a very good university, where there were a lot of rich people - really rich with handbags for 3 grand and I still didn't feel "weird" and I didn't even hide that between lectures I went to clean to say, because we had in common projects and had to work together and knew where and when I was working. No problem - they complied with me. Sometimes out of curiosity I was asked where and what I work and I did not hide anything. Interestingly, even these rich children have complexes, so it is human to have complexes and self-doubts, to have problems with self-esteem. Do not think that buying a bag for 5 vouchers will help you with self-confidence. It is important for a person not to tell others how poor he is. For the clothes they gave you great advice to see in 2. use what is there, I add - always be neat and clean, the brand does not matter and have a little, but clean and healthy shoes for example. However, when your classmates decide to go to a restaurant after the course, you just find an excuse not to go. If they want to go for coffee - you go with them and spit on 1 coffee, and if you have no money - you do not go. No one finds him strange or drowsy. I didn't even have money for a student chair or anything, and I still didn't sleep. The more you doze off, the worse. In fact, people don't care how you live, whether you're poor or not, and whether your clothes are for BGN 20 or BGN 2,000. People just have their own lives and as long as you're well dressed, CLEAN, MAINTAINED, they won't shy away from you. They shy away from you if you're shabby and if you just grumble about not having money because they think you're expecting to be treated or something. I have had situations in which colleagues did not know about my financial situation and invited me to go on Saturday and Sunday to ski on Vitosha. I come from an area near a big resort and they obviously thought I was skiing and I had money for such pleasures - but I refused them because "I have to study", and I told my relatives that I was poor and could not I ski, nor do I have the money for it. You wish you a pleasant stay and you're done. I learned to ski at the age of 28, today I drive in Austria, we have an apartment in a big Bulgarian resort and I have equipment for several thousand levs - that is, the moment you refuse, for example, to go skiing with someone, you think internally that in in the future you will ski in Austria and this is only temporary. It cheers up a lot. At the time, I was just imagining how I would have a pink jacket and an Atomic ski. Complete nonsense, but I actually then bought ... a pink heater! I said to myself - drive, but I will drive one day in my pink jacket -))))) It also helps if you feel bad in the company of someone to imagine him naked - we were not born with Armani panties after all. We are all equally naked under our clothes. I have read many books on positive thinking and self-suggestion. A very powerful book is "Cure Your Life" by Liz Hay, who was not only poor but even homeless and battled cancer. In short, there is always worse than you, but it is important to bring to mind only positive things about yourself, your future and so on. My husband was also very poor and worked a lot and told me how he got the idea to drive a Porsche and actually 25 years old. somewhere he buys a very ramshackle Porsche from Germany. I don't know if it was even a ride, but he achieved his goal and was very happy and with great confidence "in front of the chicks". In short - you do not need to have any super rational dreams, but it is enough to bring something to mind / it can be crazy / and imagine it in difficult situations where you feel uncomfortable. Poverty is depressing. That's why I didn't like to stay in my miserable apartment, but I tried to spend my time in public buildings like libraries, so to speak. I also loved to pamper myself. That is, I saved money from, say, patties and the like by not eating out at all, but one summer I managed to go to the sea with a friend and with BGN 10-20 we rented a huge four-poster bed in a very chic restaurant on the beach with a pool, where there were only the rich (or we had imagined that). I spat on a coffee all day and we had a great time. The next day we were on the city beach de ... haha, but 1 day I was in a nice place in the pool. I saw the sea for the first time at the age of 25 otherwise, so it was not easy at all in my life, but the important thing is to have some ideas in your head and not to shred without an idea outside and feel sorry for yourself. When I say that you have goals, it does not mean that you have some super huge goals now. You can think of something as strange as my husband's car or, for example, aim to go to sea - something like that. However, it is important to always have dreams, goals, interests and to strive for something more. It is also important to LOVE YOURSELF. To respect and love. To pamper yourself - be it with a better body cream, with a special soap, with food and so on, but to set aside money and time for yourself.

   From the author 1. I have never "teased" or "muttered" to anyone about anything, about the protocol. 2. To say things like "drive, but I will drive one day in my pink jacket" ... I lived with this "one day" from my earliest childhood until recently. I realized that I can no longer live with "one day", getting rich can not be a fixed idea for me, because it does not lead to anything good for me - from a psychological point of view. At least for me, it can be individual. I found it, I realized it. If I asked the question this way, then there is a reason to ask it that way. 3. I'm weird because I live in a relatively big city. In the countryside, especially when I talk to elderly people, I do not feel a drop of shame or complex. 4. I don't shuffle, I work 8 hours, 5 days a week, like most people I strictly observe my official duties, I observe all obligations as a citizen of this country at all, and I do not feel guilty about anything. I really have self-confidence as an inner feeling, I just obviously care too much about people's attitude, but it's normal, I still live with people, not in the woods.

   Author, I tried to help you by sharing things from my own life, you make fun of me. I did not say that YOU do this and that, but what irritates poor people sometimes. You don't share a lot of information about yourself otherwise, and then you distort people's words. Do you know what your problem is - it's not poverty, but that you are a terribly unpleasant person. Go to the village and there you feel among your own, but you are a hopeless case for me. You have self-confidence otherwise - you look for faults only in those around you, but you just can't communicate with people and you are an UNPLEASANT person! Bye, get well, but last let me know - people like you, who know everything and to whom others are to blame, cram in 1 place and after 20 years .... and no, it is not enough to work 8 hours 5 days a week to dial the number and that's why your salary is like that and you work poor, but you will never realize it, you will be angry with employers and people outside, and they will not sleep for you, they will continue to shy away and ignore you, and you will continue to think that it is because of your poverty, when the reason is quite different. Even though you're in the pot, you think you know everything. Well, good luck then, knowing everything and doing everything right, you don't need advice.

   Author To 24: I don't know what you take as irony, if it's for "one day" - I emphasized - it can be individual - I have personally found that it hurts me, but I'm not saying that this applies to everyone (incl. for you or for anyone). I know you're not saying I'm muttering to people, but I just decided to clarify. But that I like it in the countryside, you already say it, and I guess you are alluding to the typical "rural / peasant" thinking of the "omniscient" - well, no, I don't like this mentality, but not at all. I'm just trying to clarify my problem with self-esteem / shame / complex or whatever it is. I do not blame those around me and nothing else written below. I just clarified that I do not consider myself a sloth (parasite), that I observe my obligations, I am not one of those people who exactly "beat the numbers" with the motive "

   Author, I'm 2, I came across your post again and read your comments and answers to them. If you can read them and assimilate them as a bystander, you will see the problem for yourself. But I think that you are too closed in this shell of yours and you only show passive aggression, you feel like "attacked" or misunderstood, but even so you respond slightly aggressively. That is, yes, the problem is entirely inside you, not in others. You project your feelings, NOT ours or something else, but only your own. I see in the comments positive comments, positive attitudes towards you, people that you cut without even attempting to understand. You are completely preoccupied, dominated by this feeling of yours and you have no real judgment. I want to say that you probably only see and accept yourself in this way, if someone avoids you or keeps you at a distance, she is even a little sharp with you just because she is negative. They do not see your soul, complexes, etc., but you design them with your behavior. It is very likely that she is a beautiful, young woman who does not even realize that with two simple rags on her back she can look like a model, you do not understand that even a beauty with the latest fashion on her back can look like a girl. the broadcast. Flirt! So, without commitments, an accidental smile to a stranger on the bus or on the road. Talk to people outside you, people who don't know you, for example, on a walk in a park, talk to someone just like that, about his dog, about the weather, whatever. But try not to think about poverty or appearance, just talk with another human being. Smile! Read all the comments again as a third person - what would the author advise on the topic, for example? If I asked you for the same advice, what would you recommend? Don't be in a hurry to gnash your teeth :) think!

   And what do you care about people's opinions, because when I look here you don't reflect much on us? Come on, darling, look at your life, stop thinking about what people will say about you! Will the world end if they think it's weird?

   Apparently you have a high degree of self-pity, as well as complexes. No one here will be able to help you with advice. If you somehow raise your income to change your clothes, maybe you will solve the problem. There are second-hand shops and there are nice rags. In general, I do not understand why you put this topic at all? Examine yourself, observe why this bothers you and why you depend on the approval of others?

   To the author: You only need two things: a smile and inspiration. And clean clothes and shoes. Do not listen to people with complexes and low self-esteem. Money is not all. Human attitude is more important.

   From the author: Thanks to everyone who commented on their time. I didn't feel "attacked" or misunderstood, in fact I never said that people treated me "badly". I did not ask what to do with the attitude of people (ie with people), but with myself. You helped me - my doubts that there is no "method" were confirmed - that I choose whether to feel "ashamed" or not. I have a question for 24, if you are still coming in here and reading - how did you decide that I am a "terribly unpleasant person"? There is no nagging or irony in my question - I'm just curious - how exactly he solved it from several posts.

   И аз от всичко прочетено стигнах до извода, че авторката е неприятен човек. Едно че не казва нищо за себе си, пък иска да и дадат вълшебна формула как да имала самочувствие. Ти сама си знаеш какъв ти е живота и сама трябва да си го изградиш това самочувствие. Хората по-нагоре са ти казали при тях какво е подействало, те как са постъпили в ситуация като твоята, пък ти ако искаш постъпвай като тях, ако искаш си постъпвай както на теб ти харесва. На мен много ми хареса коментара на номер 6, защото е правила нещо за да си подобри живота, дори когато не е имала пари е търсила начини да живее и да и е интересно. Аз също съм имала период без пари, но никога не съм го смятала за нещо вечно, ами съм търсила начини да променя това. А от авторката усещам някаква агресия и все едно някой е длъжен да и даде формула за самочувствие, ама каквото и да и се каже то нейните обстоятелства са толкова специални и невъзможни, че никакви съвети не могат да помогнат. Ами като нищо не помага живей си така и си търпи, ако искаш нещо друго направи нещо по въпроса. Дори с дрехите втора ръка ми е смешно, то сега има магазини с такива намаления- чисто нови дрехи, стари колекции за 5-10-20 лв в H & M примерно, че съм далеч от мисълта, че човек не може да си купи едни прилични дрехи. А аз лично с хора като авторката не бих общувала, не защото е бедна, а защото просто е негативна. Все едно е обидена на целия свят, че тя била бедна а колегите и по-богати. И дори да опиташ да помогнеш на такъв, пак започват да те убеждават, че не било така а онака. Ами като знаеш как е, не искай съвети. Хората са ти помогнали с каквото са могли, поне бъди благодарна, че ти отделиха време.

   And one more thing to add about the shame and self-confidence. There is a reason for shame. Let's say this reason is poverty. The only way to get rid of any consequences is to eliminate the cause. That is - you are ashamed that you are poor, so you are doing something to become richer. When you become like that, your shame should disappear. There is no way for the reason for your shame to stand, and you, despite the reason for not having this shame. It doesn't work, as if you have a headache and instead of taking a pill or finding out where your headache is coming from, you are both having a headache and not feeling this headache. It's as if I'm going to be torn and dirty and I'm ashamed to show myself in front of people, but I'm not going to take a bath and dress normally, but despite being torn I'll want to not be ashamed of her. I personally understood this from the author's question. She both wants to sit in the same position she is in and is ashamed of, and she wants not to feel that shame. For me, these are two incompatible things. If she can't fix her situation, then go to work elsewhere with poor and strange people like her, and then maybe she won't feel ashamed anymore because she'll be among her peers. And now the environment looks and is much better than her and she does not feel comfortable with him on the one hand, and on the other hand can not reach their level, and on the third does not want to fall into an environment in which she will feel comfortable ( like the grandmothers of the village). In general, the author has very large internal personality conflicts that need to be resolved, preferably with psychotherapy. But she is unlikely to go that far, because she seems to be looking for the magic pill for high self-esteem despite the circumstances and without making any major changes. Which can't happen. So he better get used to the shame and not post 10 more topics on the subject. No one can give her one anyway.

   I am the author 31/32, I have already thanked EVERYONE twice who answered me. Yes, and number 6 gave me a lot of good advice. I did not agree only with the advice to live with the thought that this was temporary. Because, as I said, I don't want my mind to revolve around that, I don't want it to be a fixed idea. I want to be mentally prepared for everything, and if it comes better - well, OK, welcome. This is a decision I have made for myself and I do not engage anyone with it and I do not claim to be the right one. I didn't write almost anything about myself because I didn't want the topic to deviate (although that happened again), and there's no point in writing novels. The question of self-confidence and shame is a matter of principle, it could not be poverty, but something else. I didn't play the topic because I wanted a "magic recipe" or something. Somewhere I just wanted to share (that's why the site is), and it helps. If I am an unpleasant person, there is no way to know that the topic is unpleasant, it is unpleasant, but here everyone can share a problem, no one is obliged to read or answer.

   From 31 to the author I personally from everything I read left with the impression that you are a kind of counter to everything they tell you. You deny it in its infancy and you don't even want to understand the other point of view. I want to tell you from personal experience that number 6 has given you a lot of true advice. Just when you think something is temporary and you are looking for options to change it, even when you start with the smallest things, there is a very high probability that you will change it. And you seem to have come to terms with the fact that it will be like this with you for the rest of your life and you continue to spin it as an option to stay in the same position. From there, it is very likely that you will really stay in it, not to say worse. And believe me, a change can happen tomorrow, for me personally out of complete hopelessness, things have turned 180 degrees. But for that to happen, you don't have to have defeatist thinking, but to do even small things for change and steps towards the life you want to live. And this is for a fixed idea, but it seems to have already become such for you, when this thing bothers you so much and when it has caused this shame. Accept for the moment that you are in this situation and act for something else, but to reconcile and not be ashamed as the reason for your shame remains, in my opinion, cannot happen. And don't forget that in most cases it's all in your head. People around you may not even be impressed by whether you are poor or not, but the point is that you are impressed by yourself and from there you already think that others are impressed. I really think that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! who you want to live. And this is for a fixed idea, but it seems to have already become such for you, when this thing bothers you so much and when it has caused this shame. Accept for the moment that you are in this situation and act for something else, but to reconcile and not be ashamed as the reason for your shame remains, in my opinion, cannot happen. And don't forget that in most cases it's all in your head. People around you may not even notice whether you are poor or not, but the point is that you are impressed by yourself and therefore you already think that others are impressed. I really think that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! who you want to live. And this is for a fixed idea, but it seems to have already become such for you, when this thing bothers you so much and when it has caused this shame. Accept for the moment that you are in this situation and act for something else, but to reconcile and not be ashamed as the reason for your shame remains, in my opinion, cannot happen. And don't forget that in most cases it's all in your head. People around you may not even be impressed by whether you are poor or not, but the point is that you are impressed by yourself and from there you already think that others are impressed. I really think that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! if this thing bothers you so much and if it has caused this shame. Accept for the moment that you are in this situation and act for something else, but to reconcile and not be ashamed as the reason for your shame remains, in my opinion, cannot happen. And don't forget that in most cases it's all in your head. People around you may not even be impressed by whether you are poor or not, but the point is that you are impressed by yourself and from there you already think that others are impressed. I really think that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! if this thing bothers you so much and if it has caused this shame. Accept for the moment that you are in this situation and act for something else, but to reconcile and not be ashamed as the reason for your shame remains, in my opinion, cannot happen. And don't forget that in most cases it's all in your head. People around you may not even be impressed by whether you are poor or not, but the point is that you are impressed by yourself and from there you already think that others are impressed. I really think that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! but to reconcile and not be ashamed as the reason for the shame remains, in my opinion, cannot happen. And don't forget that in most cases it's all in your head. People around you may not even be impressed by whether you are poor or not, but the point is that you are impressed by yourself and from there you already think that others are impressed. I really think that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! but to reconcile and not be ashamed as the reason for the shame remains, in my opinion, cannot happen. And don't forget that in most cases it's all in your head. People around you may not even notice whether you are poor or not, but the point is that you are impressed by yourself and therefore you already think that others are impressed. I really think that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though! that you have some internal conflicts that are good to resolve, so I said that there is no way without a person to know your history and what caused these complexes to help you. Good luck though!

   6/19/22 .. I'm up to 31/36 (please the author not to read and not to answer) Look, don't waste your keyboard, because at the moment it is in opposition to you. There is definitely a problem with communication not only live, but obviously online. There is no problem with self-confidence, because she has enough self-confidence to oppose everyone and probably likes the way of life and everything else, so don't waste it - there are people who are resistant to advice and don't deserve it. I am angry that I gave her so much time and shared a lot of personal things about myself that even my closest people do not know. I'm glad I don't know her personally, but if I knew her, I would stay away from her and it wouldn't be because of her poverty. She is already a party of successful people and does not want to have anything to do with them, let alone take advice. She finds her situation final and hopeless and certainly blames others, parents, start in life, the state, employers, society and so on, and therefore does not think she depends on it. In short, she chose the easy attitude of standing paralyzed and waiting for someone to fix you (something happens to you) for a meteorite to fall ... Unfortunately, a large part of our society is like her and social differences will become even sharper, because this group of people will stand still, the others will progress faster and more obviously. Nothing, at least for Karbowski there will be enough material. Unfortunately, much of our society is like it and social disparities will become even more acute because this group of people will stand still, others will progress faster and more obviously. Nothing, at least for Karbowski there will be enough material. Unfortunately, much of our society is like it and social disparities will become even more acute because this group of people will stand still, others will progress faster and more obviously. Nothing, at least for Karbowski there will be enough material.

   You can't be poor and depressed. Everyone would be depressed by this.

   Well, buy decent clothes. Clothes are no longer available. There are discounts. In some famous shops there are nice T-shirts for 3-5 BGN each. There are almost new clothes in the second use. You can dress for the summer from top to bottom for almost no money. And stop people from avoiding you and looking at you in disarray. Because you're obviously dirty. Lack of money is no excuse.

   It's all in your head. Poverty is not a vice, so you have nothing to be ashamed of. It is a shame to be a thief, a liar, a swindler, a traitor and a simpleton, just like politicians, not to be poor. It's just that some people are luckier than others. Always have self-confidence and keep your head high and don't care at all, as if you have millions in the bank. I know such people and the fact that they do not have much money does not stop them from being happy at all. You are what you accept yourself to be and this is radiated by you.

   Leave the girl alone! She has a social phobia, most likely, and your comments don't help her at all

   H 39, and how exactly do you help when you scream? Or out of habit just to reflect an action of some kind? At least we try to help the author, but maybe you also need help just because you are in the other extreme.

   39, is not a social phobia this for sure. If it was a social phobia, the author would be unemployed. People with such a phobia would not be able to apply for a job, even if they are hired, to go to this job every day and do it. (off topic, but just to clarify that not all unemployed people have a social phobia, different people have different reasons)

   I am the author of the story I wrote it mostly to share and to finally understand that there are different and opposite points of view for everything. So every single comment was helpful to me. I did not understand why the attacks were on 6/19/22/35, the fact that she decided to write a comment (even a long one) does not oblige me to agree with her, it is a matter of upbringing to thank, but whether I will agree it's my job. Anyway, I do not want the topic to become a source of controversy, thank you all for your views.

   Well, get educated. Read books and magazines, the internet is full. This way you will always have something interesting to ride. Where does your self-confidence come from? You have to have something you think is cool. Identify what attracts you to others, what you want to be and become one. There is also enough popular literature on the net on your problem. You have to do something. You do it. Not to happen and to happen. Good things don't happen. We bed them to come.