Hello, I am a 20-year-old student. I'll start with the fact that I've always been defined as weird, I hate going to discos, I don't listen to chalga, I don't go out often at all, I prefer to stay at home, cook, clean, read and I feel like I'm born to be a housewife. I'm very sexual and I definitely like to do that too, and everyone I've had an intimate relationship with so far has told me that I'm doing great in bed. I think I am beautiful with a well-shaped body. I had a really serious relationship, I was in eighth grade when this "love" was revived. For three years we weren't always together, he cheated on me with my best friend and many other girls. Going back in time, he laughed at how hard I had taken things, but his actions made me feel inadequate. When I was 18 (summer vacation between 11th and 12th grade) I met a family friend I knew from a very young age. He was 46 then, I know you will accuse me and say I am stupid, but I fell head over heels in love. He showed me a truly gallant MALE attitude, unique sex and I loved it with all my heart. Our relationship ended after a month at my request, then I wanted to return to him, but he never wanted to. For two years now, I have been waking up every day and falling asleep thinking about it, even during the day it is in my thoughts. I haven't slept with another man, I want to be faithful to him, although I know that he has a girlfriend at the moment (even a few ...), but somehow I feel like I'm cheating on myself. Whatever I do, I do for him. I go to the gym to please him when he sees me, I dye my hair for the same purpose. I still love him, but I gave it up. He doesn't want me anymore, he played with me, he saw that I was still a child and he didn't want to come back. I know I have no future with him, but he is still in my heart and I still hope. Will I ever love like that again I had never felt so happy in my life, as if I wasn't on my own, dizzy with love. I gave everything for him and for me he was everything. He made me cry with happiness and I loved him madly. Before I saw him, I felt dizzy, as if I were on another planet. As I have already told you above, I love seka and I hold on to it VERY much, and it suited me perfectly, I knew what and how to do ... I am sure you will understand me. But after him, the others are disgusting to me, I can't look at another, and I definitely don't lack male attention. When will I stop loving him? Will I feel this love again, but will it be shared this time? I have heard from many people that this experience is a once in a lifetime and I am just desperate! I want the same thrills, the same happiness, the same sex ... but how can it happen, given that I can't and don't want to look at another ...? And two years passed ... I met and went out with over 100 boys, but no, he's still in my thoughts. What to do?
Answers 12
You are obsessed and you do not see the whole picture. Ask yourself, what has the gentleman in question done for you besides take advantage of your love, and what has earned him so much adoration? It won't be easy for you, I'm going through the same thing right now - I've been obsessed with a lady for years who doesn't deserve me in any way, and I'm a 40-year-old man
He does not love twice in the same way. Two relationships are rarely similar in feel. What you have experienced once, you will not experience exactly the same thing again. But you will love and maybe you will love more. You will have all the wonderful sensations and you will always feel love that will catch your attention and grab you. You will not love in the same way, but you will probably love shared, stronger and better. At 20, it's not your job to give up on everyone else. Your man was 46, he had experience, and his whole attitude was due to the fact that he knew what to do. He played, you were an easy target, now he has other goals. Don't live for him, live for yourself.
This is not love. M37, I know how to touch a woman, not only on the body;)
This can not be true
I understand you completely ... and I am like that, only I am no longer 20 ... I haven't been attracted to another man for 4 years, I just don't have eyes for anyone. Personally, I hope it will pass, although I already have a lot of doubts. I constantly think about him, I can't get it out of my head :(
This is the magic of obsession. It is very difficult to overcome, but to make it easier for you to meet others and try to relax with them. A friend was in a similar situation and started dating a boy who was very attached to her. It so happened that he offered it to her, and she accepted it without feelings for him. This is the only thing I don't approve of, because it's not cool to play with people's feelings. I guess you understand what I'm talking about and how to fix it. Just let other people into your life, but don't be with them just because of your problem and dump them afterwards. I was in a similar situation and they lost 4 months of my life to tell me that everything was in defiance of someone ex .. I wish you success! Victor 420
From the author- I will give you a very fresh example .. It's hard for me to forget it because last night he called my father, today my father returned the call and he did not pick up, and I can not sleep all day and all night and I think of him as crazy. Some hot and cold waves sweep over me and I swear I can't control my emotions. And the fact that he called my father is perfectly fine, because they have been classmates for 12 years and separately, they have some kind of kinship, not blood, but in short; my grandfather's sister's badjanak (who is my grandmother's sister's husband) was the mother of the man I'm talking about. It happens at home that he is questioned, and very often simply because we have a lot in common and it is difficult for me to bury him in such circumstances.
What I can't understand is that at the beginning of your story you write that so far, with whom you have had an intimate relationship, he has always told you that you are excellent in bed, but then you write that with a man other than the gentleman in question you do not you slept. Do I not understand something or are you mistaken? Also, in order to give you better answers, can you describe in detail the appearance of the man and specifically how he behaved before and during sexual intercourse, ie what is so special did you go to bed so that after so many years you would still be speechless?
Until number 8 from the author - I have not slept with other men since I slept with him, that is, for two years. He is just masculine, tall, slender figure, very wide and big back, big biceps, blue eyes, he is handsome and every woman would agree with me. I've always liked rough sex, also talking dirty things to me during sex, being subdued, and he did that without me asking him ... he liked all the things that I did. Perhaps the fact that he was played and that at least a hundred women passed through his arms played a big role. He often told me that he didn't think I loved him, I just loved sex. Even a few months ago, when I was trying to get it back, I texted him; "I love you more than anything". His answer was that I love sex and nothing else. He never believes that I love him for what he is, not because we have good sex. Maybe I contributed to his opinion of me, but still ... I loved him. I'm already starting to wonder if I really only loved sex ... but for one sex to torment him for so long ... is it possible?
Girl, she's been 26 years old, this man was having fun, and you saw sex as love ... This relationship ended first, it's doomed. In a sense, he doesn't want you as a woman. Find a boy your age and you will see how good the feeling of a young body is, although not so experienced. Build a relationship with someone you have more in common with, now is the time.
How to tell you. He is experienced and has fulfilled your wishes in bed - which are the same as the wishes of about 90% of women. And what did you do for his?
I think this story is a perfect example of why one should be careful with whom one begins an intimate relationship. As far as I know from history, the man in question has nothing but a beautiful appearance and good skills in bed, this is of course enough for some people, but these qualities alone do not lead to a long and stable relationship. The gentleman may be masculine in appearance, but he is by no means masculine in character. As a man, I would never allow myself to fuck my family friend's daughter, whom I have known since I was a child. This man probably even played with the author when she was little, and now that she has just turned 18, they just meet "by chance" and start having sex, it's just disgusting ... The most unfortunate thing is that he fucked the author's psyche so hard, that she would probably never be able to have a really strong relationship full of love, because the thoughts of this man would stay in her head forever. In my opinion, the only chance to solve the problem is if the author starts going to a psychotherapist and tries to really understand her behavior.