Why Do Boys Always Do That?

If the moderators can share the story, because it's really important to me. I searched and found no such stories. So ... I started writing to a guy on the Internet. We've written to each other before, but we started more often. We talked on Skype, we drool. He was joking with me that I had white hair (it's actually blonde, but I had sent him a picture that looked white because of the effect) ... I yelled at him that he looked like a rat. We talked on Skype for several days in a row. And one day in the conversation it was me, my best friend, and some friend of his. And he jokingly calls me to become boyfriends. And I told him well. He joked that I would send him a link on Facebook ... in a few minutes he would send it to me. Okay ... the next day he writes me that we need to talk about bonding when I get home from school. I thought he wanted us to get rid of him, because there were a lot of negative comments. He actually asked me if I really wanted to give it a try, considering he wasn't serious. I agreed. Not that I liked it, but I decided to give it a try. The next day he told me we needed to see each other live and talk. I sensed that something had happened and made him tell me. He had reconciled with his ex-girlfriend (who had cheated on him) ... I was dumb ... He explained to me how things were, that he had given her a second chance to see if she had changed and to give her back what she had done. .

Offer me to be friends with privileges. Although I knew it would not lead to anything good, I agreed. After a day we went out (he suggested of course) ... In the morning while we were fine we both talked for 1 hour on the phone, which was sweet. We left, we found each other. We sat down to eat at McDonalds ... we drooled, we talked about each other. We got up ... we left the restaurant and he went to the toilet. We went to some toilet ... I waited for him. We sat in front of the toilets (there were seats) and laughed, drooled, etc. At one point he kissed me ... the moment he kissed me, no matter how banal it sounds, I felt the butterflies in my stomach. We kissed for a long time. He made fun of me for raping him at a teen party last week. (which I don't remember because I drank, which I'm not proud of.) I explained to him that I didn't understand such things, etc. He laughed and we started pushing. Then he laughed at me for not understanding anything, and I was teaching him a new kind of kiss even now. He picked me up and while there were no people we went to one of the toilets. We kissed there ... he asked me if I wanted to do something else. I told him emphatically that we won't have sex, or I'll give him blowjobs. He told me that he hadn't thought of it and that he wanted me to enjoy it.

He kissed me, unbuttoned my jeans and asked me if I was a virgin. I told him that I was and he started slowly and slowly .... At one point he asked me if I wanted to put my finger. Although I knew it would hurt, I agreed. It hurt at first, then I felt good. Shortly after, we just kissed and I decided to return the favor. I got up, took off his jeans and yes ... (I didn't do anything with my mouth, just to say. I don't think a girl my age blows and goes.) ... It's over and we're gone. We walked a little more and went home. We wrote to each other again in the evening, he made fun of me for saying that I didn't understand anything, but I proved something else to him. The next day there was another teen party. I went and he was there. We danced, drooled ... kissed. It was great, after all ... I liked it. He pulled me to a booth to talk ... we talked about us again .. He kissed me. He made me sit in it (with both feet on either side) and we kissed again. Then we went dancing again ... all the time he was looking at me and smiling at me.

Several times his friends painted me, and he naturally scolded them. I greeted him with a song that I know he likes very much. He grabbed me and pulled me to the part of the disco where there were no people. We kissed, we pressed. He asked me if I wanted what happened in the toilets again, and I told him there were a lot of people. He touched me once and told me: someone is very excited, which in fact was the case. I laughed and told him I couldn't help but be with him. We kept kissing. We went dancing again, we kissed again and the disco was over. We left. In the evening he laughed at me and called me wet. We wrote to each other, the next day we quarreled over something. We didn't write to each other for 2 days. We got along ... We wrote to each other, we drooled. There was another teen party the following week. I went. And he was there again. We went outside ... we talked and he said I had to decide if we were going to be friends or friends with privileges. I didn't really know. He knew I liked him I had told him. He had some feelings for me, but he also had feelings for his ex (with whom they had broken up ...) In both cases I would be sick.

I told him I would think and we went inside. We sat and talked. We drooled. We had gathered in front of the toilets with his company and he was dancing and it was quite fun. Then a girl kissed him, a friend took me and her and him outside. They started calling her, I was sitting and arguing with him. We finally managed to figure it out, and I told him not to approach it and everything exactly. We didn't see him after that, because he was just sitting in his booth. I only called him to tell him that I wanted to be friends with privileges. He said well and went out. The disco was over and we left. I saw him from outside, I said goodbye to him and left, and he called me to hug me. We wrote to each other in the evening and he said that it was best for both of us to be just friends. I accepted it, even though I was really sick.

We haven't written to each other since. Four days later he left with another girl and he kind of forgot about me ... I know he cares about me like a friend, but why did he do all this - kissing, pushing, this in the toilet and all the teasing and night talking. Just to be attached to him? I really like him very much. Will I be able to get it back in any way or do I have to give up? A 15-year-old girl. (The boy is 17, almost 18) I don't want you to make me a whore, a slut, etc. So far I haven't done anything like that with a boy, I'm a virgin. And was it just for one push, and what happened in the toilets?