Where Did I Take Her?

I'm 26 now, but I'll go back when I think everything went wrong, and before that my childhood was naughty, but after these moments that I'm going to tell, I just hated life with all my heart and wondered how I deserved it all, I was a good and meek child, and I made my way to the ant, saw that no one appreciated it, and became just the opposite. When I was little, my father died, until then my mother and I were about to divorce, after he died, my mother and I moved to a bigger city to live in, she found a job, started dating, went to discos in the evening. , I was silent because what to do 12-13 year old boy who is depressed because of the death of his father and has found himself in a new city where he knows no one. He introduced me to men several times, it was explained to me that he was looking for a serious friend and that we should know each other. At one time, the next one came home and she soon said that we would live with him and leave the apartment. She finally found the right one. He doesn't ask me if I want to, they just hit me in his house. I heard them having sex, he colored her and slapped her ass in front of me, once even with all his impudence, as if by ear, he asked her if she would let him go behind. I heard everything, I was 2 meters away from them. I was 14-15 years old when all this was happening. I have no other relatives besides my mother. Her boyfriend and I didn't talk. I was in puberty then, she never talked to me about girls, she never asked me if I had a boyfriend, she just told me to be good, modest, polite, cultured. At school, however, the atmosphere was just the opposite, everyone behaved like savages.

They got drunk and entered the class ground. I was the bison because I learned my lessons, I was a convenient target because I didn't know anyone and I was alone. The teachers knew everything, but they didn't care at all, they were just waiting for us to finish and leave, they were fed up with the students' nonsense, and they were adults and they were waiting for either retirement or graduation. And for each succeeding generation, they said it was getting worse. I was 16 years old, I don't remember exactly which class, but it was 10 or 11. We talked to my classmates about sex and when they asked me if you had sex, I said no. A laugh erupted. It turned out that only I was a virgin from the whole class. I was ridiculed for days. I was very ashamed. I decided to solve the problem by going to a prostitute. The internet is full of ads! But complete! I chose one, I went to the place, I paid, she undressed, for the first time I saw a naked woman, and she was beautiful, she would never tie me up if I tried to take her off in the normal way. Never! A 16-year-old squirrel with a 25-year-old collar chick. I had only seen a naked woman in porn, and now I saw her naked and bloated in front of me.

I liked it very much and I felt satisfied. I started wanting more money from my mother and going to prostitutes. That was my vent. There I let out my anger. As I gained some experience, I started fucking them furiously. I did what not. I cummed in their mouths, put my middle fingers in their mouths as I fucked them in the back, pulled them by the hair, pressed their heads while they blew. All this prostitutes offer as a service, so there can be no question of violence. After all, I'm not a freak, I can't imagine doing this with a normal girl. I know how it feels to make fun of you, I don't want to cause it to others. But I did it with the prostitutes because they offer it themselves, I fucked them like rags and after such sex I was so calm, relaxed. No wonder I got caught! I accepted it as a way to avenge my life for all the crap he served me. However, this lasted quite a long time. Exactly 10 years have passed and now I am 26, now it is completely different, I haven't had a school for a long time, I don't live with my mother and her friend, which made me think, shouldn't I have finished a long time ago? But how can I find a normal girlfriend when I have such a past? I didn't even hold a girl's hand, I did all sorts of porn performances. Surely this would not have happened if I had just been lucky enough to be born into a normal family with normal parents who would set a normal example for me. But on the other hand, one is responsible for one's own actions after one turns 18.

What do you think? Do I deserve a chance or not to stain a normal girl and stay away from normal ones? I haven't been to whores this year. I'm sick. How many are there - I don't know, I don't care, I can't remember them all. They did their job when they had to, why should I remember them, I think now. If life has another side, I want to see it too.