Where Are Our Children?

   Yes, our children are gone. Author and I agree. Our children need us until the age of one, and then we become redundant. And the fact that the child has 2000 friends on Facebook shows that he lives more in the virtual world than in the real world, and this is already dangerous. He needs to communicate with his peers and grow, gain experience, not virtual friends. Because it is not known how things will develop and such a child can then easily be deceived, lured by inappropriate people and that is why we are to blame again with our limitations. It also depends on the child, however - there are children who stand their ground and know their price and have their own opinion. But the fact that our children grow up on their own is also a problem - current families should have 2 children at least, and not as it is with most - only 1 and all the care and excessive concern falls on him and then he feels responsible to justify our trust. The current children go to the gym the most, and do not play in front of the block, they know the new technologies, but they do not communicate enough with each other. They sit in front of the computer and so myopia and spinal deformities appear. They have more than we once did, but they are more lonely and unhappy. They go to coffee from the 6th grade and start thinking about boys or girls. They miss the games. They go to coffee from the 6th grade and start thinking about boys or girls. They miss the games. They go to coffee from the 6th grade and start thinking about boys or girls. They miss the games.

   You're right! With these technologies nowadays, you can very rarely see the views he listed above. Take a walk around a playground and you will see many small children who really still need their mothers. But then laptops, iPhones with touch screens started. In my opinion, things are relative. Parents tell their children what to play when they were little! However, in my opinion, the children themselves choose whether to click all day in front of the computer or to go out behind the block to play guards and Apaches. And they find it difficult to realize that physical activity is more useful and stay online on a site.

   I was very impressed by your topic, I agree with each line ... I wonder if it is not different in small towns? next

   Hello author, you think that a child needs to have a happy childhood. It is this childhood in 1995 that is right for you, and you do not realize that the world is changing as it has always changed. You do not realize that your parents, grandmothers, great-grandmothers thought the same way, because their childhood was different from yours. Think about whether your grandmother did not think about your childhood like this: how is it possible for a child to jump on a rope in front of the block and not be able to run "freely" among the meadows of a village, how is it possible not to know how calves are born, how it is possible to have sex before marriage, do you notice how the notion of child freedom has changed then, in the same way. No dear author, children are not alone, they have their own lives. While your great-grandmother needed to know some information in order for society to consider her a great independent person, this information was small enough for her to be able to learn it until the age of 15, then get married and start a family. Our children in the 21st century have a lot more information, so they need more time to become complete and separate from their parents. Yes, our children cannot raise a child at the age of 16 because they cannot provide the necessary things for a child of the 21st century. Your grandmother needed to know how to wash by hand and sew socks to look after a child, and now in this global world you need to be able to make enough money to look after a child. And something else, your great-grandmother came to life without a tube, a lady or a blood, and she hardly knew what it was, she had other games and activities like the children have now.

   The children are at the stupid discos and cafes. :) They have been growing up since they were 14 years old, but I'm surprised ..

   yes, the sad truth

   Well done! I completely agree with what is written, very accurate and unfortunately very true. I have yet to become a parent, and I have always thought about what parenting should be like in these increasingly globalized but alienated times. The environment for adolescents is now very sterile and at the same time unhealthy, parents are overly concerned and at the same time detached from their children, the rules introduced by the state are pro forma for the interests of children, but they are ineffective. In my opinion, the child should be given more freedom. I think that the most important task of a parent is to get him used to thinking and making independent decisions. More real games with other kids and less computers. But for that to happen, we adults need to start changing.

   Hey, I'm still thinking about childhood because it was the best time of my life. Full freedom. One time our people left and left me for a month in the care of my grandmother, who lived at another address. I was almost seven - the summer before first grade. I wouldn't let my grandmother in if I didn't want to. I looked like Tarzan, and all the yards in the neighborhood were my jungle. I climbed trees, jumped fences, ran in front of cars and buses. When I was hungry I ate whatever I liked - pears. When ours returned from a trip, they had to cut my hair almost to the skin because it was full of gum, matted and impossible to comb. Of course, their first job was to wash me. Glorious time - I will never forget how happy I was then !!!

   Very well written. Well done :)

   Amy, you can't see the kids in front of the block playing rope, rubber band, checkers, hide and seek or other such very nice mind games. Now the internet is literally killing everything alive. This Facebook should be banned. Young children, just as they grow up, copy one by one what is happening on social networks. Also, chalga is a big problem for today's children, even for everyone. We need to introduce everything from the time of Bai Tosho, give them order and discipline and see how Bulgaria and the children will shine. The uniforms must be returned to the teacher and you must study poems for March 3 and May 24. Children need to be taught to respect the holidays and themselves. And in 2-3 absences they should be punished. Now they make 600 unexcused absences and do nothing to them. On the contrary, they are the heroes of the class. Tragedy! If Chalgata and Facebook are banned, that's 50 percent, will fix things in Bulgaria! A child, no matter how good his parents are, when he goes to school he becomes a completely different individual.

   Ehhh, ... the truth itself! ... Everything you wrote is absolutely true, to the point of pain !!! But what can be done? Can parents overcome their fears and give their children freedom? Can they vote for them? Yes! But ... people now are used to keeping everything under control! They do not allow their children to have time to think for themselves, or to make a decision! Because they are afraid that their child will make the wrong decision, or something irreparable will happen! ... I think it is clear what the reason is. Television, newspapers, news, if we look closely, are all negative, as if they aim to scare people :)) They report, this one happened, this one! ... And people are afraid that something bad will happen to them. Not to mention how suspicious everyone is! :)) You say ... you don't see children, but did you see anyone talking on the street? : ) People are everywhere, and they pass each other silently and sullenly! As if the whole world is to blame! ... No one dares to say a word to another, unless it is absolutely necessary! And he does it with great effort: D Society as a whole can be expressed with the word - antisocial! ... Why do the leaves of a tree fall? ;) Ha, the problem is not with the leaves themselves, the problem is at the root !!! The problem started with the parents themselves, and their beliefs, how to live? !! The curious thing is that often these beliefs are not theirs, but learned from public views! Why? Because most parents were not ready to be parents, and do not know how to vote of confidence for their child !!! So instead of teaching him what is right and what is not, they just set a limit in everything and complete control! ... Well, I'm asking you :) By controlling and limiting the lives of your children, do you manage to protect them from bad things? Huh? Because obviously that doesn't help! Otherwise, there would be no children smoking, drinking, taking drugs, no kidnappings or other incidents. So find out, you can't protect yourself from everything! As much as you want! The more you limit the social development of one child, he will find a way to compensate through another, and you will not even understand how, so, can go the worse way, or the path of despair! ... And for those other parents who show themselves as perfectionists, I will say, don't you forget that you, too, were once children? :) How did you live, how did you grow up? And don't excuse yourself like everyone else with the fact that the times were different: D So ... ok, they are different and so what? Does the difference mean deprivation of normal development? !! ... :) Hmm ... most of the topics on this site are from depressed, with social phobia, fears, and suicidal ideation !!! Eee ... if you notice, the ones written by children and recently grown-ups predominate! Between 15 and 21-24 young people, and what despair emanated from them !!! Because it is difficult for them to communicate, because they have no experience in communication! Because they are not understood! ... Most often we read that they led a difficult life, their parents did not understand them, and when they shared their difficulties, they did not want to help them! Is it? Whose fault is it? ... Good ... we create children :) For what purpose do we do it? Children are not things, they are not possessions, they are not a given, and they are not a bank for your future! They are people like you. And they need to live to gain experience. You will not always be by their side! Nor will you be able to protect them from any mistakes they might make. You also made mistakes in the past, don't want your children to be sinless or done! ... : D Ah, I still believe that there are people who create their children, without any side interests and intentions, but out of love, because they wanted their love to bear fruit, something that connects them more strongly, and unites love them in one;) We are far ... far from a free society! ... We just think we are free! :)) Freedom requires sacrifices that we are not able to make! Freedom is also a responsibility, and we are used to living in society! To take advantage of all the realities of modernity. To be human today is to be a consumer! Society destroys dreams of freedom and imprisons us in a great penal colony, not so much with its laws and rules, but with its fears. Few dare to live differently - they are usually people with a very strong will !!! The rest just follow what others do, and so on for the rest of their lives, are just a buzz in the big public "machine". They do what they hear and are told! ... It is well described in Erich Fromm's book, "Escape from Freedom" :) The bad thing is that parents do not have time for their children! They do not have time to understand them, it is easier for them to "close" them. And how much better it would be if a parent is like a friend to their child :) This is the only way to build trust between parent and child! ... Which parent does not think that his child is always inexperienced and small? But which parent wondered if he knew his child? It is common for a parent to have no communication with their child. And the conversation should be reduced to, whether he did this, whether he did what happened, or he doesn't do that and so on. However, this is not communication! If you get to know them better, you will be surprised that the children understand very well what is happening, that their nature is very delicate. And that they have their own opinion! So ... if you care about your children, you will make sure that they have self-confidence, that they grow up confident, it can't happen if you don't allow them to have their own life! :) PS Who wants to ask me a question or say something. He can do it completely ANONYMOUSLY on [BREACH OF THE RULES] :) No registration required. I guarantee there will be answers. ~ winterfire ~

   The topic is super current. I hope more people read it!

   Thanks to everyone for the comments. This topic is not sucked out of my fingers, just because I feel some nostalgia for the "lady" and the "cow". I am 24 (almost 25), but despite my youth I had the opportunity to experience many misfortunes that more or less made me first stronger, second more open to people and their pain. I adore children and look forward to the day I become a mother, but from now on I have made it clear that the child is not a doll that dresses and eats. I see motherhood as a privilege, not a responsibility - the privilege of forming values ​​in someone, the privilege of being a support and friend, the right to give trust and freedom. For almost seven years, I have been dealing with the child's psyche every free second. How wonderful, how wonderful and wise are the hearts of our children ... how much understanding, love and trembling hide. And I see a mistake that is repeated everywhere, the child is not talked to, the child is talked about and he grows up insecure that he is unique and that he has every right to be so. The specific reason for my article is a story that had a happy ending, and although I'm happy ... I can't hold back my tears - why it came to this. Some time ago I met a boy who was depressed, little by little, we both dispelled all his fears and yesterday he had sent me the most inspiring message anyone could receive. He is 17 years old and had no friends, he shared that his parents do not understand him and it is as if they live in a world of their own, but he was an example and they were proud of him. Everything seemed so normal, but this boy lifted the carpet a little and there was Hell inside. In three evenings he talked to me about how he wants to commit suicide, shared, told ... And today we celebrate victory with him - he has a girlfriend, yesterday my advice was not about how precious life is and how to take it in hand and what gift to take to his beloved, because she had a birthday. Do you know what's scary? In one topic in teen forums are just like that ... The problem is so big and no one pays attention to it. The teachers of the old generation are already dying out, unable to cope with this changing world and in their agonizing, in fact, they only impose punishments and ruin the children. Parents live in a very dumb movie and think they have a normal family - well, ok, but if it was normal, your child would not talk to a stranger in an anonymous forum and share that he thinks about the end of life. I currently work with many children (children :) - wonderful young people in the range of 12 to 20) and all share one thing - they are unhappy at home, feel closed, feel guilty in front of their parents, almost obligated to pretend happy because theirs do too. I tried before talking to my parents - a complete waste of time and energy. Because I didn't have children of my own and I don't know anything. And I still do not understand - that you gave birth, does it make you able to truly love, does it make you wise enough to accept that your child is a separate person with their own aspirations, dreams and path. Does it make you able to give trust, to be brave, to be happy? And the big problem of children with divorced parents - I've talked a lot with such children. Let me tell you what these children want in plain text - to leave them alone, not to have to choose who they love more, to be able to love both their parents in peace. Do their parents allow it - no! Absurd! I don't know if you have children or not, or are about to become parents, but please think about something. The world of a child's perception is different from ours. And if you really think about your children, look at the world through their eyes ... you would never really see it as it is for them if you kept looking at it through your eyes. Don't rest your miserable life on their shoulders - you have no right, they are not here to save you and make you happy like some dolls, they are here for themselves and they want their own, only their own ... The world is not cruel, from before. Technology ultimately helps us ... if a child gets hurt now, they can call mom right away and react faster, but whether the half-hour checks will prevent him from falling - no! In the morning, someone drives them to school, then another picks them up and takes them to after-school classes, where they stay until someone comes home, then that someone picks them up and takes them elsewhere until mom and dad finish their day and work. they take them. They go home, sit at the computer, have dinner and watch TV, and in the meantime they listen to how busy Mom is and I don't know what else. You know what a 13-year-old girl told me: "I hate commercials where everyone is smiling, the woman is a perfect housewife, and the father always leaves the newspaper to play with his children - I hate them because I know it's maybe, but I'll never have it. "For seven years, I looked at myself and heard tears ... I don't want to see them again. Hey, kids - you're the future of this planet, everything is in your hands, and I know that in these hands, it is safe. You just have to want to be yourself - unique and beautiful as you really are, NO MATTER who tells you what - be it your parents. By no means do I call on you to rebel, I only call on you to believe more in your uniqueness.

   I quote you, Winter: The problem started with the parents themselves, and their beliefs, how to live? !! The curious thing is that often these beliefs are not theirs, but learned from public views! Why? Because most parents were not ready to be parents, and do not know how to vote of confidence for their child !!! Do you know what is decisive TODAY in this modern and free society for when a person is ready to become a parent: We want a child, but with this job, how are we going to hurt him? - Have you heard it. Why didn't I hear once: I want a child, but how will I raise him, can I pass on to him the basic wisdom of life, will this child be able tomorrow, when it is time to face only the world, to do it with full faith in himself? Will I be able to give him this foundation? Will I be able to learn from him, will I be able, am I ready to cultivate in him a love of life and teaching, to nature, faith and virtues - do I know what they are to pass them on? Not to mention those striking cases when the child is created just to keep the partner next to us so that there is someone to take care of us, because we are so cowardly and pathetic that we have not yet learned to take care of ourselves . You will meet many such mothers in this forum. They still rely on their mother to run their lives, or listen to their friends, and they already have a child, two children, and experience themselves as the long-suffering Genoese. But they continue, as they know ... why? Because of the children .. :) laughter in the hall! And these kids hate them ... that we have not yet learned to take care of ourselves. You will meet many such mothers in this forum. They still rely on their mother to run their lives, or listen to their friends, and they already have a child, two children, and experience themselves as the long-suffering Genoese. But they continue, as they know ... why? Because of the children .. :) laughter in the hall! And these kids hate them ... that we have not yet learned to take care of ourselves. You will meet many such mothers in this forum. They still rely on their mother to run their lives, or listen to their friends, and they already have a child, two children, and experience themselves as the long-suffering Genoese. But they continue, as they know ... why? Because of the children .. :) laughter in the hall! And these kids hate them ...

   Author, what is the proper upbringing of children in your opinion, I read your topic, comments and compare my 13-year-old son, his classmates and my childhood. My daughter is still 4 and I can't compare the girls. №4 I am and I am, a woman of 36. My son and his classmates, their day goes like this: In the morning after breakfast around 9:30, their first job is to sit at the computer about 10 boys in a conference call, the family decides. As we were glued to the phones with washers, two by two to write homework. They announce on Skype Facebook which they like / like. We were called by the boys we like, playing the tape recorder on the phone with the song "step by step" I was exactly 13. At 11 o'clock my son is ready with homework and gather at the stadium to kick or in the school yard on the levers except those who are training on something. They go to school together and finish at 6:30 pm, but come home at 8:00 pm because they talk on the way, even though we live three or four minutes from school. He eats while telling me today what happened and sits down at a conference call to play an online game again around 10-12 kids until about 10pm. I agree that 2-3 hours a day a computer is a lot, but my mother also told me that an hour or two a phone a day is a lot, her bill was huge. I agree that they don't have much time together with their father, but they catch up on the weekends. I talk to my son once a day on the phone, for about 30 seconds, "Mom, I'm where I am, I'll go home to ...". I don't think about me or the other children being lonely. I don't think you and the other people see them in front of the block, you just read the complaints in the forums and that's why you think they're lonely, and the reason is that there are no levers in front of your block and the children are on the playground. Not to play checkers and rubber bands but have other games. As in kindergarten we were taught by Pateto Yaki and the cauldron is boiling, now the children do not know these dance songs. I know all this because I am a honey nurse and I work 6 hours a day. I have more time to be at home and the children come to drink cocoa / juice, talk to me about how to act and for now they consider me a "cool" mother, maybe because I allow almost everything I just want to be informed where they are, so without to ask let me know what they plan to do. It happened, for example, that they told me we were going karting and I replied "Please don't tell me when you're going, I'm afraid for you, it's better for the mothers not to know" And they are waiting for that, they always start telling me where they are going . Where do you want the children to be? What should we parents do to maybe go out and force them to play our games? Should we teach them from an early age that our childhood is the "right childhood"? That the new laptops, iPhones with touch screens are wrong because we didn't have them? That's why I think you're wrong, you only look at it from your point of view, because you only meet children with problems. Yes, our classmates have children of divorced parents and a child of an alcoholic, but this does not mean that the child does not have a childhood, it just has more problems. He has learned to cover them up and solve them in his own way and no one bothers him, the children accept him as a normal child. because we didn't have them? That's why I think you're wrong, you only look at it from your point of view, because you only meet children with problems. Yes, our classmates have children of divorced parents and a child of an alcoholic, but this does not mean that the child does not have a childhood, it just has more problems. He has learned to cover them up and solve them in his own way and no one bothers him, the children accept him as a normal child. because we didn't have them? That's why I think you're wrong, you only look at it from your point of view, because you only meet children with problems. Yes, some of our classmates have children of divorced parents and a child of an alcoholic, but this does not mean that the child does not have a childhood, it just has more problems. He has learned to cover them up and solve them in his own way and no one bothers him, the children accept him as a normal child.

   Until next: I'm a girl of 13 from a small town. No, it's no different. In my neighborhood we are a few children, some of whom do not go out .. all fight a lot, we can almost never be all together without someone intriguing, without someone being angry with another. 3-4 years ago it was not so. Everyone went out, we played various games, such as hide and seek, chase, judge, folk ball, potato, wall, etc. And now: We go outside, sit on a bench and just sit, the others talk about wrestling, Facebook, sit on the phones, and I, no matter how much I suggest just to walk, to move, they do not want .. then we go back to the computers. I'm more interested in my mother now and I go out more with her, because she doesn't just tell me about internet sites and wrestling, we walk, we share, we move! And my friends go now to the apartment of one, now to the house of the other and again on the phones and computers, and it's such a nice time outside! I'm so angry! I am also of the opinion that people have become addicted to cyberspace and have forgotten what it is like to go out, run with friends, walk in the park, not in cafes or in front of computers / phones! Half a year ago I registered on Facebook, I logged in only once because it was boring! I don't know what's so interesting there, some dumb games, pictures of boys with tiles, edited with "Phtoshop" and pictures of naked 10-15 year old girls, labeled "muffin", "duff", "take it", "cute" ", The" ideal of the neighborhood ", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. here in the house of the other and again on the phones and computers, and it's such a nice time outside! I'm so angry! I am also of the opinion that people have become addicted to cyberspace and have forgotten what it is like to go out, run with friends, walk in the park, not in cafes or in front of computers / phones! Half a year ago I registered on Facebook, I logged in only once because it was boring! I don't know what's so interesting there, some dumb games, pictures of boys with tiles, edited with "Phtoshop" and pictures of naked 10-15 year old girls, labeled "muffin", "duff", "take it", "cute" ", The" ideal of the neighborhood ", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. here in the house of the other and again on the phones and computers, and it's such a nice time outside! I'm so angry! I am also of the opinion that people have become addicted to cyberspace and have forgotten what it is like to go out, run with friends, walk in the park, not in cafes or in front of computers / phones! Half a year ago I registered on Facebook, I logged in only once because it was boring! I don't know what's so interesting there, some dumb games, pictures of boys with tiles, edited with "Phtoshop" and pictures of naked 10-15 year old girls, labeled "muffin", "on Duff", "I took it", "Cute" ", The" ideal of the neighborhood ", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. I'm so angry! I am also of the opinion that people have become addicted to cyberspace and have forgotten what it is like to go out, run with friends, walk in the park, not in cafes or in front of computers / phones! Half a year ago I registered on Facebook, I logged in only once because it was boring! I don't know what's so interesting there, some dumb games, pictures of boys with tiles, edited with "Phtoshop" and pictures of naked 10-15 year old girls, labeled "muffin", "duff", "take it", "cute" ", The" ideal of the neighborhood ", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. I'm so angry! I am also of the opinion that people have become addicted to cyberspace and have forgotten what it is like to go out, run with friends, walk in the park, not in cafes or in front of computers / phones! Half a year ago I registered on Facebook, I logged in only once because it was boring! I don't know what's so interesting there, some dumb games, pictures of boys with tiles, edited with "Phtoshop" and pictures of naked 10-15 year old girls, labeled "muffin", "duff", "take it", "cute" ", The" ideal of the neighborhood ", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. take a walk in the park, not in cafes or in front of computers / phones! Half a year ago I registered on Facebook, I logged in only once because it was boring! I don't know what's so interesting there, some dumb games, pictures of boys with tiles, edited with "Phtoshop" and pictures of naked 10-15 year old girls, labeled "muffin", "duff", "take it", "cute" ", The" ideal of the neighborhood ", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. take a walk in the park, not in cafes or in front of computers / phones! Half a year ago I registered on Facebook, I logged in only once because it was boring! I don't know what's so interesting there, some dumb games, pictures of boys with tiles, edited with "Phtoshop" and pictures of naked 10-15 year old girls, labeled "muffin", "duff", "take it", "cute" ", The" ideal of the neighborhood ", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. and photos of naked 10-15-year-old girls, labeled "muffin", "on Duff", "I took it", "Cute", "the ideal of the neighborhood", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous. and photos of naked 10-15-year-old girls, labeled "muffin", "on Duff", "I took it", "Cute", "the ideal of the neighborhood", etc ... Complete boredom! I want to go back to the years when this site was not so famous.

   I read it all and I'm 16 years old girl, I remember when I was 11-12-13 how we played behind the block of guards and Apaches, a lady, badminton, on the walls with a soccer ball was very nice then. And now a man of my age wants to go for coffee and there he is closed again and sits in this cafe until 9-10 and when he changes he is closed again .. and I go to the cafe, but I admit that we sit for a maximum of an hour and a half. there and not for 3-4 hours. The weather is warm now and it is good for walks and not for sitting in front of computers, cafes and other enclosed spaces, computers have nowhere to run.

   to 15 by the author Sun, I do not compare my childhood and from there to draw the logic that today's children are not looked at properly .. no, I do not do that. It's just that from those days I got a kind of nostalgia ... for years I haven't seen a drawn game on the asphalt ... as if it never existed ... but then I looked around - it wasn't because of the games, there is no one to draw them. You say that there are no levers in front of my block, I don't just sit in my block, do I :) My job was in another city, I traveled, I passed every day through two residential neighborhoods with many blocks ... even with levers. All that was left was for the children not to go outside at all - then it would be better for them to catch and throw a bomb on top of us so that the rubbing would happen faster. I'm not talking about your son, about your childhood, but about where the reason is, one of the many to meet more and more sad and lonely children. You say that your son is not alone and that's wonderful and I believe you ... but I know the other side too. The boy who wanted to end his life ... what do you think, that he didn't communicate with anyone at all, that he didn't have his friends, that he was almost literally locked up somewhere - no! Here's the problem ... that on the surface everything looks normal, and if you dig it up (sorry for the expression) - it stinks! I had an incredibly crazy childhood .. somewhere upstairs a girl had described her grandmother's vacation ... oooo I know this feeling about Tarzan :)) But it's completely different. You know what happened to me then ... I fell into a hole that deepened, I got to the point that I fainted if I had to hear someone on the phone ... I don't know how it happened ... little by little. I just know this social phobia from the inside and I know how ashamed you are of it, I also know how "normal" you behave in front of others. Here's the boy I told you about ... he was telling me that everyone would probably be very surprised, because NO ONE suspected what was going on inside. I have a wonderful father and I sought help and support in his face, but I .. I went and told him "Dad, I think I'm sick .. not physically, something is wrong with me." Do you know how to share such a thing - you can't even find words to describe it, let alone expect to be understood correctly. For example, my mother thought I was dramatizing and almost pretending to be pampered :) Somewhere in the comments on a teenage topic I read it: "There are so many such topics here, and strangely in reality there are none" Why? Because until the end, everyone is used to pretending that everything is fine. And who taught them that ... well, I'm sorry, but the parents - they just follow their behavior! The fear of misunderstanding is also a very groundbreaking stone. "They won't understand me" They don't want to hear me "They won't believe me" they won't do it "they sacrificed everything for me, I can't hurt them" - all words heard! And I think ... if the children had known freedom from an early age, learned to communicate, to discuss their world ... maybe the problem would not have reached such proportions. Of course, I don't say "everyone" but read in some forum "I feel misunderstood" my life is ruined "" I'm depressed "" our people are ashamed "- you will see them easily, you don't have to look for them specifically and that's the sad thing Does any of the parents present here know what their child's dream is? Does he know what he is talking about with his classmates after school? We locked the kids in spaces, to be constantly before our eyes, and in fact the paradox is that we know nothing about them. Do you know what a firstborn told me - I want ours to be dead! But since the child's psyche works more with abstraction, this does not mean death in its literal sense, but simply PEACE! The parents of the same child told the psychologist (I had been invited to his meetings before and I had to get acquainted with several cases) that they had a normal relationship. Where is the logic? Where is the thread lost? There is again a very big mistake and it is allowed to talk en masse about the child, not with the child. And the world of the child is viewed from the standpoint of our perceptions ... of adults. The best for the child is the best for us ... and this is far from the case. What we think is normal we impose when we see our child, and it is surprising, but he has his own opinion. And another thing, for example, makes me very angry, in the same way it makes the kids angry. Two mothers, for example, meet and start a conversation, the child of one is with her. You don't talk to the child, you don't talk to the child, but you talk about the child ... and it's from the sides. Ask him how he is, what you ask his mother, ask him if he liked the walk. Also .. more: This famous "we" We ate now, then wrote our homework - you heard it - I'M SURE! (read the topic about the English teacher and that you hear it if you are not) The children grow up insecure, unhappy and lonely ... I do not generalize, but I do not specify - a very large part of them, however, are exactly like that. .. and it is from the sides. Ask him how he is, what you ask his mother, ask him if he liked the walk. Also ... more: This famous "we" We ate now, then wrote our homework - you heard it - I'M SURE! (read the topic about the English teacher and that you hear it if you are not) Children grow up insecure, unhappy and lonely ... I do not summarize, but I do not specify - a very large part of them, however, are exactly like that. .. and it is from the sides. Ask him how he is, what you ask his mother, ask him if he liked the walk. Also ... more: This famous "we" We ate now, then wrote our homework - you heard it - I'M SURE! (read the topic about the English teacher and that you hear it if you are not) Children grow up insecure, unhappy and lonely ... I do not summarize, but I do not specify - a very large part of them, however, are exactly like that.

   to 16 Hello1 :) Which site - Facebook .. if you want a little variety in the network, various platforms with blogs (you can even make money like that). what is interesting for you to visit and I can direct you somewhere if you have a desire .. and for nature .. why not go on a picnic with yours, for example? and don't invite your girlfriends either .. maybe they welcome the idea, does anyone know;)

   The reason is that there are no levers, that's right :))))))))))))))))

   Author, even though you had a "good childhood", you had problems, as we all had. Who has learned to stand up quickly does not depend on whether he has played a queen. Thirty years ago, my mother also spoke to her friends in the same way "we" as they spoke to her about their children, but that didn't hurt me or their children, that's not the problem. Nor is the problem who knows how much to talk to the child, rather the problem lies elsewhere, in my opinion the children are different mentally and may need more listening with understanding. To have topics like "I feel misunderstood" my life is ruined "" I'm depressed "" our people are ashamed "there is no one to listen to these children, not that there was anyone to listen to us, but we shared more with friends, while now from an early age they set a limit and each child thinks very differently from the other. To ask themselves these questions and diagnoses, they are simply looking for their way in life. You don't have to take their words literally "I feel misunderstood" my life is rotten "doesn't mean exactly that, but it means I'm hurt and hurt right now, if you ask the author of the topic in a week if you feel that way he won't be sure anymore and will answer you I do not know, maybe.Everyone has had a moment in his life to feel misunderstood or ashamed, it depends on how long he stretched.If it is too long it already leads to extreme depression and suicide. are who knows how guilty, before there were teachers in the kindergarten and primary school who were more interested in children. Is the boy with the topic " Now no one pays attention to other people's children and does not bother to warn parents about a growing problem. Parents, on the other hand, think that they know everything and everything is OK, as long as no one complains, and then as the problem grows, their problem comes like thunder from a clear sky. They decide to fight to intimidate but it's too late, the children have advanced with the courage that everything in society is allowed, that they have rights. This is the only difference between the "good childhood" / you know the allowed limit / and the current one there is no one to set a limit and the parents are not the sun to shine everywhere. There are no teachers, uncles and aunts to exclude you if you smoke for the first time. As soon as your parents find out, you have learned to smoke, you have learned where it is safe to hide and they could hardly affect you.

   Yes, you are very right ... but do you know how many times I have heard from parents who think everything is OK - "Do you know better about my child, don't confuse me" The problem does not come from the children. .. and from us as adults. As Winter said above ... how often we greet someone, talk to him, just like that - strangers are strangers and the point is not to deal with them. The man is more and more closed, his horizon is more and more narrow, pressed by his own pride and suffering ... only he teaches this to his children, what else to teach them as he does not know? And this "we" is not the main problem, of course it is not, but it is a link in the whole chain that tightens our necks. On a subconscious level ... the child hears "we", hears it constantly and this over time creates great difficulties in detachment. Here, your son is 13 ... in just 10 years he will have had to take his first important steps in life, move out of the house, work, study, build a career and his family, right? But if he constantly hears "we just wrote our homework" "we fell asleep early" ... this does not create a sense of teamwork, but a feeling of inferiority, as if he is incapable of being ME, as if he MUST feel only part of us . I say again, on a subconscious level, on the thin strings of our soul, it sounds scary, it tells a child "You can't do it alone, you can't do it. You don't know how." And then when you have to complete it yourself his character, to take his own path, he hears exactly this: "You do not know how alone" and begins to feel first insecurity, second .. already attached to the old, it is convenient to always tell him. In fact, this "we" is a manipulative inclusion technique. In corporations, it is used to create in the employee the "idea of ​​a family" .. or in a word, for hell to "zombie" and think about the goals of the company, not about their personal progress. It may be a trifle at first glance and we may not realize what it is causing us, but in fact it is not ... it's like an avalanche that starts with a little snow to bring destruction over time.

   Author, allow me to answer the questions you ask by disagreeing with your opinion. My work is related to children, so I think I have a look at the issues you are talking about. 1. At 3 pm the children are not normally on the streets - the younger ones sleep in the afternoon, and the older ones are either at school or preparing for the next day / lessons, homework, extracurricular activities /. 2. Go out to the park in good weather and you will be convinced that it is full of parents and children / Of course, we are talking about parents who are not at work at this time /. 3. It is not true that children do not like to play rubber band, football, hide and seek, etc. You just have to teach them these games. The main problems are not only the availability of telephones, internet, cafes and discos. The problem is that neither the spaces in front of the blocks nor the streets are a safe place to play.

   23 ... are you serious and for which country is this? !! Because it is obviously not for God! There should be someone between 13 and 17 years old here ... I need a little help to explain to these adults how exactly at 15:00 you write your homework and prepare for extracurricular activities and how much you care about how many courses Mom and Dad have decided to enroll you. And does anyone care exactly how safe the street or bench you are going to push with your boyfriend is? 23 ... here is this overprotection and exactly this ignorance I am talking about. And exactly this "closing" of the "children" in some spaces, and in fact their final distance, from which follows the only thing we are capable of - imposing our NORMAL if you see a worldview .. You say they are normally at home and write their homework. Normal for whom? For the schedule we created for them ... well, you teach them to comply with schedules ... but that's how you depersonalize them and make them just another comfortable creature who will comply tomorrow, will come, will cast their vote, will then spit the same system they voted for and will they think that the world in which we are becoming more and more alien, more and more unhappy, closed and more and more nervous, depressed, sick, etc. is normal. 23 ... do you know what freedom is, please give me a definition! in the park? How can I not see them. Mom and Dad came out with the stroller ... you know, very often not because of the child himself ... but because of themselves - to see a few people walking outside, to see that everything is normal ... mothers sit down, they gossip about something .. someone and another dad watch him play with the child, he enjoys it like a toy ... that then he is at work and will not be able to hug him, Mom continues to gossip with her friend or most often to complain about how tired she is .. or to brag "and we have a tooth" "and today we wrote a letter for the first time" ... empty job, 23 ... normal because it's normal. But is it really NORMAL? The stereotypical person does not like to think about these things, not to accidentally miss public orders, to become uncomfortable, to have to be brave and defend himself. How exactly do you deal with children ...? to take to become uncomfortable, to then have to be brave and stand up for himself. How exactly do you deal with children ...? to take to become uncomfortable, to then have to be brave and stand up for himself. How exactly do you deal with children ...?

   To 19: Hello, it's 16. Yes, Facebook ... basically I like sites like this - sites where you can read something, learn something new. We went on a picnic exactly 1 time ... now with at least one other friend who didn't go out long before we walk every day, because we both want to lose weight.

   hello, 16 The good thing here is that anonymity implies more courage to be ourselves, and I welcome this idea with all my heart. But if you take advice from me - be careful. The fact that someone says things as 100% valid only means that they are one hundred percent valid for himself. Otherwise, it is interesting, you look at other people's destinies, draw conclusions, ask questions and get different opinions, which is a treasure. Sometimes, when we delve into a problem, we are like "blind" and bystanders can give us some other point of view that becomes the starting point for our thoughts. When you write in your uncle Google "human nature" "human relationships" "personality psychology" - many interesting sites will open, where there are wonderful articles that will be useful for you to get to know yourself; ) I love blogging. There you both have your own place to write, whatever you want, and you have a form for comments, you get interesting acquaintances and interesting discussions. I'm not very familiar, but there is a way to put a banner and make money while having fun;) Good luck! You have good energy - you will handle everything;)

   Where are they? In front of computers, or having sex ... Sad ...

   , , Where are they? In front of computers, or having sex ... Sad ... '' Really sad and very ... I'm a 19-year-old girl, but I remember a few years ago, when I was a child, how we played and didn't spend all day we were cleaning. I remember one summer - I was 12. Every vacation I went to the village with my grandparents, and not only me. We gathered in this village children from several different cities. Well, this summer of 2005, we were out all day. One day it went like this: in the morning we would get up, eat something quickly and go out to see each other, to talk. Then we went home for lunch. And because it was hellishly hot at noon, we stayed at home. I personally read something. Then - at 5-6 o'clock we went out again and did all sorts of nonsense. Then we went to the river or to the neighboring village. We went home for dinner and went out again. We went home at 10-11 in the evening, even ours were already in bed. We were warned to beware, etc., but no one exercised strict control and no one trembled over us. Well, we survived ... We didn't need conference calls, chats, etc. We didn't even use mobile phones. And now at this age, at 12, they have already smoked, had sex and wrote on the forums :, Am I pregnant? '',, The first time it hurts a lot, do I have anything? '',,, Can I get pregnant without it penetrating me? '' and other nonsense of the sort ... Poor picture ... they had sex and wrote on the forums :, am I pregnant? '',, The first time it hurts a lot, is there anything wrong with me? '',,, Can I get pregnant without it penetrating me? '' and other nonsense of the sort ... Poor picture ... they had sex and wrote on the forums :, am I pregnant? '',, The first time it hurts a lot, do I have anything? '',,, Can I get pregnant without it penetrating me? '' and other nonsense of the sort ... Poor picture ...

   Here I am. The 21st century child who dreams of living in the time of his grandparents. Where children my age play until dark in the countryside. Where the topic is not wrestling, sex, Facebook, checks, porn, etc. Where you go to school to study and trouble is to steal junk from the neighbor's tree, not to sleep with someone, but these remain dreams ...

   So how are they? At home in front of the computer.

   It seems to me that you are quite exaggerating. Not that there really aren't many children who don't stick their noses out, but there are also many who go out. For example, I constantly see children with bicycles on the streets as well as on the playgrounds. Just because they don't play under the window doesn't mean they're on the computer. When we were children, there were simply no conditions and we were forced to kick in the middle of the street. In the same way, however, many stayed at home in front of the cable or electronic game. I also don't think people are angry or anything like that. I even think things are getting better. I see more and more cheerful and smiling people, chalga "culture" also began to recede. Of course, the environment also matters. It is very important that it is favorable.

   Today's children are "sharpening" their brains for "realization outside", meaning abroad. That's why we don't see them playing. Not to mention that they are completely divided over "let's sign up to train something" - outside of school. At one time, coaches went to schools and gathered children to practice the sport they had chosen, and there were many motivated coaches. Sports are not just tennis and football. There are a variety, even mountain orienteering under the guidance of physical education teachers. There is simply no organization at the moment, because all living things have escaped outside on a "saddled horse". A lot of your coaches have gone abroad to train other people, but there are coaches there too, right? - Here in this section "family" topics are just a complaint from someone or something. How could one not say to do something or I'm guilty of something, etc. Children cannot organize themselves if someone does not educate them about something, and it must be for good, not to be used for other purposes. --- When you read the dreams of teenagers, they are just what language to learn ... well, physical education, why is it neglected? What are a lot of languages ​​for you, when you can't walk 2 km, but only by vehicle. Putting it all together, this is where the diseases in today's youth come from. but only on a vehicle. Putting it all together, this is where the diseases in today's youth come from. but only on a vehicle. Putting it all together, this is where the diseases in today's youth come from.

   32, well, how will they not leave. Should they work here for  for  500? !! Come on, thanks, no need. As for sports, there are still enough opportunities for sports, even much bigger than before.