This Is Not Life!

   Why did you make this mistake? Well, because you were in a hurry to go to the marriage academy, instead of working and (or) studying, to be an independent woman. Now you have children, but you have no job and you are sick. So where? Where to go? You will be patient, darling, but at least raise your children not to be like you. Although it has been proven that children raised in such an environment either become abusers or victims of violence.

   Until 1) I got married at 23 I thought we already knew each other well. I've been sick before. I graduated from the University of Biotechnology. I decided to start a family, but my mother-in-law started blackmailing us for money, from there we started arguing and it got here.

   Author, run away from this man ... it is unlikely to change.

   This is really not life. To feed you and your child to allow themselves to quarrel with you and, on top of everything, to have a parent who wants to take money from your due. I can't believe that there is a man, be it a Bulgarian, who, when you cook, washes and greets you at the door with a smile and a kiss, calls you with these ugly words. So to call you that, there is something "every dog ​​has a dog in front of it" Author, when you are sick, do you have a telk / pension.

   What does it matter if he takes a telco pension, then some pensions. More importantly, there is no one next to you. As far as I understand, he lives in his apartment, he tried to take the child to his mother. In that case, beat his jester to go to the mother, and you look after the child peacefully and calmly. In this way your health will improve and stabilize. These freaks suck your energy, cut their receipts and watch your life!

   №5 It also matters a lot, read the topic and then give advice, will you support the lady and her child. She does not work, she says she is sick and if there is no telk then she is not so sick but just lies at home and waits "freak" to feed her to pay her bills. She doesn't seem to cook for him, she washes and greets him with a smile when he is dissatisfied and insults. When you wait for someone to support you, you are expected to do other things for them and not care if they will help their mother. To call a man "Not a bad, good soul" with such words to lock you in his rooms deserved it by action or inaction.

   The author seems to mean that his mother is setting him against her. I grew up in such a family, I know what we are talking about, the influence of these witches is great. They take pity on the shortcomings of the chosen one of their sons, they are always perfect, they pity, pity for madness and the son, not having the courage to knock his mother, piles it on himself and suddenly this accumulated anger, this tension pours on the object, "guilty" for spoiling his spiritual peace, according to his mother. Number 6, you can't be sure that she's not fulfilling her husband's duties, but paying her bills and supporting her doesn't mean he has every right to harass her. I hope you don't run into a bad mother-in-law. And what do you think, that's how Telk gets a pension ... yes. If you do not have at least 5 years of work experience, if you want to be disabled, you will not see a pension. Unfortunately it's like that. Everything is connected, Telk certifies you, for example, but Noah returns you if you do not have work experience and you have not paid social security contributions. And you, author, don't look for excuses, get medical treatment, file a complaint with the police, sue him, haven't you heard of official lawyers?

   I totally agree with №7! №6 is a villain like the mother of a super "kind and caring husband" who must stand on a throne (as kings-lords stand) because the kingdom depends on them. Or maybe №6 is the mother herself, as long as she stands up so dynamically for the husband! There is no guarantee that everyone who receives an illness pension is actually ill, the practice has shown a lot of fraud. And there are many seriously ill people who have been forgotten by our welfare state. Yes №6, I, You, They, all in this country have to pay the bills of troubled Bulgarian citizens, otherwise what a welfare state we are. Since the girl cannot cover her expenses, does she have to work as a slave, in what century do we live? Woe to a country with citizens like №6!

   I'm not angry, but I think realistically. I dynamically advocate for the "man" because you look at his two most beloved women, not only do they not understand each other, but they also spit on each other with an intermediary, himself. He works hard to support a family, his mother roars that she doesn't have enough money, his wife mutters that no family money will be given to his mother, and where is he? It is an ATM without the right to decide how and where to spend the money it earns. And in the midst of all this, he can't go home to rest, but he has to listen and take part in scandals. If this man, even if he was with the devil, is greeted with warm food with a smile and a proposal for a back massage, he will be immediately on your side and would never allow a hair to fall from your head, let alone offend you.

   If he is a real man, he will put things in place! Apparently, his mother does not need financial help, but blackmails them! There is blackmail when you want to harass someone. If his mother was a good and needy woman, this sick girl would take a bite out of her bite to help a suffering man, because she herself is suffering. But when malice is felt, even the most greedy will be indignant! This man just "bought" a woman, used her to live with her, and always looked at his mother. Such mother's sons are not the head of a family and because they suffer from an inferiority complex, they insult and curse the weak ones! I'm sorry about this girl, I completely understand her. In her case, there are two options - either the husband with her, and from time to time to go to see mom (without mom to interfere in their lives at all), or to send him to live with his mother!

   №10 You are talking about the completeness of the spouses "He if a real man" and is she a woman on the spot? How did you find out whose home it is, where they live, in general, how do you know if they are not in an apartment, for example. Or if the home they live in is hers / from her parents / it compensates for the fact that she is not a full-fledged wife, right? Not all people on earth are perfect, and he and his wife have flaws, and that's perfectly normal. We cannot demand that the other party be without flaws, because we are not. Is men the head of the family in question? The man may be the head of the family, but the woman is the neck and wherever the neck turns, the head also looks there, I hope you understand me. I also fully understand the woman / I am a woman / but she cannot change her husband if she does not change herself, her attitude towards him. In the very topic, the woman talks about this, that he is actually good changes after visiting his mother-in-law. If his mother-in-law says bad things about his wife, and when he comes home his wife starts grumbling and scandals, he is convinced that his mother is right and ugly words and violence start on his part. These are responses, there will be no reactions if there are no scandals. If his mother is not attacked and it is explained to him, for example, that at the moment the child needs boots and we do not have the financial means to help your mother and we would very much like to. He will not attack but will speak normally. It's just that the wife has to change tactics, don't you understand? It is very easy to talk about divorce, but here the woman and the child are dependent on the man's money. Sick, unemployed, with a child, left alone without money, how do you see it. The woman says that there are no relatives to help her, so she needs advice on how to cope on her own. And since her husband is not always a complete monster, but only after visiting his mother-in-law, he has a way out without divorce. There is no way to change her mother-in-law, therefore she changes her tactics with her husband and everything is fine. He just has to constantly prove with actions and words that in fact the mother-in-law is wrong, he has a head on his shoulders and can judge.

   №11's comment is very correct. Do not think about divorce if you do not have the physical and material conditions to ensure a decent life for yourself and your child. Just try to change your mindset and attitude towards your husband and mother. I'm sure it's hard, but give it a try. You are currently clinging to the idea, you will be unhappy, misunderstood, used, lonely, sick, penniless, etc. You are looking for sympathy and understanding. Okay. Everyone needs support in a difficult moment, to whine, to complain - we are human. But still grit your teeth and try to be greeted by a good-looking, smiling and calm woman when your husband comes home. Ask him how his day went, ask him to tell you about his victories or worries, sympathize with him if he is tired, encourage him for small successes. Make him feel calm and comfortable. It's okay that at this moment you want him to hug and pamper you - calm down and it will happen. Just be patient. Let him know that you have lovingly prepared dinner for him and that you and the child have been looking forward to the time he comes home. Make him feel like the most loved and respected man (men really like that!). Force yourself not to mention a bad word about his mother - for better or worse, men adore their mothers! What's more, when she comes to visit or he goes to her and send greetings or tell him that you will prepare her favorite dish. ask him if she, as an elderly woman, does not need help and what you could do for her personally. I know this sounds obvious to you, but believe me - if you change your attitude and mood, things will change and you will live in peace. You are a human being who deserves all the happiness in the world - it is in your power to be free and accept it. When you approach someone with a positive attitude, no matter how angry and heartless he is, he ultimately accepts the positive energy. It will be very difficult for you at first, and as soon as you think you can't go on, take a look at your child. Fortunately, our children know how to charge us with an unlimited amount of patience and strength. Slightly less things will calm down and synchronize with you. And who knows - your mother-in-law may become your friend - after all, you are connected by love for the same man! Well, this last one was more of a joke, but who knows .... I sincerely wish you success - and head up! Believe me - you have many wonderful moments ahead of you, the current experience is just a life lesson,

   But where it says that the problem is that the author's husband supports his mother financially and she grumbles. I read it 10 times and I didn't understand. This is about humiliation against her, not money scandals.

   №13 look at the comment №2 №12 It is too early for the author to think, to treat her mother-in-law well. For now, to treat only her husband well, and the mother-in-law can really be mean and cunning.

   There is no such miracle, a quarreling daughter-in-law and mother-in-law will never fall in love. The war between them will stop when they stop seeing each other. If a man wants peace, he must impose his masculine influence, talk to each one individually, and make it so as to tame them, but not take his mother's side. Instead of helping a weak and defenseless girl who has been harassed by two soulmates, you are advising her to be submissive, despite the harassment she has been subjected to. You must be a mother-in-law, too, if that's how you see things right. Read again what the girl was called, and yet you justify this freak. Whatever his wife's behavior, no one has the right to insult her. If he doesn't like it, let him move out, but not to insult and raise scandals. We are not in the early 20th century when women had no rights, and we are at the beginning of the 21st century and equality is complete. I do not approve of the advice of №11 and 12, who want the girl directly to behave like a slave, to be humiliated, but to suffer for the sake of the child. Thus, these evil people (son and mother) will become even more impudent, even more inventive in the methods of harassment, and then the girl will completely collapse, both mentally and physically. And do you think about the family atmosphere in which their child will grow up, what he sees and perceives, what he hears from his father and grandmother? Would it be better for him to grow up in such an environment? I think it is not good for the child! even more ingenious in the methods of harassment and then the girl will completely collapse, both mentally and physically. And do you think about the family atmosphere in which their child will grow up, what he sees and perceives, what he hears from his father and grandmother? Would it be better for him to grow up in such an environment? I think it is not good for the child! even more ingenious in the methods of harassment and then the girl will completely collapse, both mentally and physically. And do you think about the family atmosphere in which their child will grow up, what he sees and perceives, what he hears from his father and grandmother? Would it be better for him to grow up in such an environment? I think it is not good for the child!

   №15 We have nothing against you to take home the poor, sick girl and feed and raise her, together with his generation! But if you don't take him home, this situation is the only easy option for him. We simply explain to the girl that a "good soul" man does not shout such words when you greet him with a smile and understanding. In the meantime, you don't have to agree with him in the meantime, you just give him things to make him think it's his idea. When you mention to him that he would very much like to help his mother, but today the child tore his jacket and needs a new one. He himself will come to the conclusion that the help for mom will be postponed for now. The idea will be his and you have no guilt, that is, you will not be the object of insults. And this is the purpose of the lesson.

   16, these primitive ideas for approach in your relationships apply them in your life, they are inappropriate for our time! You live in the last century. And the most disgusting abuser, he certainly had moments in his life when he was a reasonable man, but after he became a soulmate, he is no longer a man of respect, let alone loved! I don't know, №16, what kind of family you have, but with these considerations that you present, it is obviously not normal. If you are inclined to live as a slave, do not want people with dignity to do the same! We live in a welfare state that helps those in need when needed. That is why social benefits are distributed. There are organizations that help mothers who are abused, but you live in the past, what can I explain if you do not understand me! There is a law by which the mother can convict the abuser, not only not harass her, and to pay maintenance for both the child and her (if she is ill). Get out of your primitive thinking, and learn about today! And let your husbands crush and insult you, and you crawl at their feet!

   Ha-ha-ha №17 YOU live in a fictional time, a "welfare state" ha-ha. Do you know if you have read our laws on social benefits? PPZSP is called, if a single mother with a child under 3 years of age receives a total of BGN 98 for her and the child this includes: BGN 21 3. benefits for a socially weak mother BGN 42 and of course if there is any income from maintenance from the father they are deducted in order to receive no more than BGN 98 in total per month. How do you think a child with BGN 98 per month is considered a "welfare state". If the child has reached the age of 3, the mother must have more than 6 signatures in the unemployment office and have not received benefits in her lifetime, only then she is entitled to one year if she remains unemployed. Coincidentally, my sister works at D SP. Our author is ill but it seems that there is no certificate from the TEMC or, if there is, she does not have 5 years of experience for a sickness pension, therefore she is not entitled to that. You hope she can convict her husband of supporting herself, there is no such thing as "supporting an ex-wife" in "our welfare state." The child will be awarded no more than BGN 60 per month, depending on the income of the father, if he is insured at a minimum salary of BGN 30 for the child. And even in the absence of income, do you know how easy it is to transfer custody of his father's child in a divorce? With this mother-in-law, the child will be taken away. I suggested that the lesser evil sit on her ass and not anger her husband, knowing that she could not cope on her own. If he can manage to get a job and only after the first salary to think about divorce.

   №18, I see that you are well acquainted with the provisions of the laws in our welfare state. I will not argue, it is inappropriate to argue about something so clear and categorically simple. The laws and rules in the country are applied by people who have similar thinking to yours, so the effect of their application is deplorable. You yourself say that the laws cannot protect and ensure a peaceful life for a harassed young mother, which means that our entire country is still living in the 20th century, and we claim to be a civilized people. And yet it is inadmissible for a girl to be humiliated and harassed just because the man fed her? !! And in the slaveholding system, slaves were fed, and by your logic they must have been content with that, and grateful to their masters. As we do not have a state to help those in need, Father Ivan's inn shelters suffering mothers with children. Better to go there than take her life, mother and son. The woman may be sick of them, and leave your obedience to you, as long as you do not respect human dignity!

   I'm sorry, girls, but we don't live in a welfare state, nor does it claim to be one. We come from communism, where people like the author were completely left without protection. At least now there is a court, there is a police (not a militia). Well, no? has gone to court - this is a problem. Her problem. There are many welfare states. One of them was Greece and look where they took him. Everyone has their own head on their shoulders. That is why we must be very careful about who we marry, to whom we give birth to children. I don't mind paying more taxes to make our country a welfare state. They will not give us loans either, because we have gone bankrupt 2-3 times in the last 30 years. There is only one thing left - everyone is saved individually. Who is dependent on a man financially, who does not watch when he gets married, unfortunately ends up as the author. I was especially annoyed by her passivity - no? went to court. Well, should Boyko Borissov go to court in her place? What does he expect? Human dignity must first be defended and respected by oneself. We cannot solve the everyday problems of individuals, it is not only too expensive, but it is also unconstitutional. Such is life - it is not a fairy tale, if you do not fix yourself, wait for a letter from God, wait for the state, the king and BB Number 18 - my parents were not given children, they were not given BGN 98, because people worked, paid taxes and earned more than BGN 300. Well, with this money we lived four people + my grandmother, whose pension went to the Swiss banks at the expense of various communist greats. And that was in his good years. We lived otherwise 97 with exactly $ 45 a month, we dug potatoes, beans, vines, we looked after animals in the city, to feed ourselves. Then there was no BGN 98, and at the end of the year they told our people that there would be no BGN 8 for children. Laugh. I have not relied and I will not rely on the state, I pay my taxes to have BGN 98 for other women, but I pay for the medicines of a grandmother who cannot go to work - she is not sick, but an old and sick woman. There are many people in need of the author in this country and I do not feel sorry for her. At least she is young, she can tighten up and turn to the authorities, supported by our money. So much for us, the rest depends on her. And we struggle with life every day, but there is no one to give me BGN 98, to ask me how my dignity is! As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more? that there will be no BGN 8 for children. Laugh. I have not relied and I will not rely on the state, I pay my taxes to have BGN 98 for other women, but I pay for the medicines of a grandmother who cannot go to work - she is not sick, but an old and sick woman. There are many people in need of the author in this country and I do not feel sorry for her. At least she is young, she can tighten up and turn to the authorities, supported by our money. So much for us, the rest depends on her. And we struggle with life every day, but there is no one to give me BGN 98, to ask me how my dignity is! As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more? that there will be no BGN 8 for children. Laugh. I have not relied and I will not rely on the state, I pay my taxes to have BGN 98 for other women, but I pay for the medicines of a grandmother who cannot go to work - she is not sick, but an old and sick woman. There are many people in need of the author in this country and I do not feel sorry for her. At least she is young, she can tighten up and turn to the authorities, supported by our money. So much for us, the rest depends on her. And we struggle with life every day, but there is no one to give me BGN 98, to ask me how my dignity is! As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more? but I pay for the medicines myself to a grandmother who can't go to work - she is not sick, but an old and sick woman. There are many people in need of the author in this country and I do not feel sorry for her. At least she is young, she can tighten up and turn to the authorities, supported by our money. So much for us, the rest depends on her. And we struggle with life every day, but there is no one to give me BGN 98, to ask me how my dignity is! As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more? but I pay for the medicines myself to a grandmother who can't go to work - she is not sick, but an old and sick woman. There are many people in need of the author in this country and I do not feel sorry for her. At least she is young, she can tighten up and turn to the authorities, supported by our money. So much for us, the rest depends on her. And we struggle with life every day, but there is no one to give me BGN 98, to ask me how my dignity is! As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more? And we struggle with life every day, but there is no one to give me BGN 98, to ask me how my dignity is! As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more? And we struggle with life every day, but there is no one to give me BGN 98, to ask me how my dignity is! As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more?

   "As long as we blame the state for our own life problems and mistakes - there is a court, there are police, Grandpa Ivan - what more?" - this is salvation !!!

   Hello! We are not living in an apartment, we live in my father's house. I have a pension of BGN 150, but what can I do with it? I don't blame anyone, and I wouldn't write, but the harassment of me started when my mother died. My mother-in-law only wants money, strange as it may seem to you.

   I don't want to be misunderstood. There is a lot of suffering in this world, I'm not the one who is the worst, but the attitude of the man who swore that he loves me gave birth to his child, I almost died and on the contrary ??? ... there is no one! But how do I understand it? It behaves perfectly literally. Because I can't go anywhere alone, he goes where he needs to, he fixes my documents, he goes shopping, there is no dispute. He looked at me like a little child. However, his parent (I understand that she is his mother) is harassing us. She starts the negotiations from afar and starts screaming to give her money because she doesn't work, but she doesn't receive a pension either. She lives with a man who also does not work, and harasses her old parents; I bring BGN 400 in addition to my pension. I want to be useful to my family. But dear people, I can't stand a woman who is right and healthy at the age of 54 and. I understand that she wants to do it twice, and at least to return them :( but she doesn't do that either. I don't have the nerve for courts. I don't have the nerve for that, I think I have to remove the irritant! and makes him take out a loan. I swear to my child I'm not lying to you. It's a monster. that I need to remove the irritant! I want to tell you something else, this woman is wanted because she lured a bunch of people with money that she does not return. KS becomes close to someone, enchants him and makes him take out a loan. I swear to my child I'm not lying to you. This is a monster. that I need to remove the irritant! I want to tell you something else, this woman is wanted because she lured a bunch of people with money that she does not return. KS becomes close to someone, enchants him and makes him take out a loan. I swear to my child I'm not lying to you. This is a monster.

   Do not give up

   I wrote a lot on your topic, but from your last comment I realized that it made no sense. You want dignity, respect and advice. And you make us think for 24 days, "poor unemployed with no income." What turns out to take 150 pension + 400 salary with their own home. So you have a good social status for Bulgaria. You make us think your husband is a freak and then you mention "He looks at me like a little child" - markets, documents fix. You want your husband's respect just because you gave birth hard. You are not the first to give birth, you will hardly be the last. Respect and disrespect for people are earned with attitude and attitude. You talk about great care on the part of your husband and how you thank him, or he is obliged because you gave birth. I wrote that your mother-in-law may be mean and cunning, but I withdraw my words, you are the one who shows malice "

   N25-I say my husband is watching me because I can't go anywhere alone, do you understand me? I tell the full truth and I'm not afraid of what I swore. This only shows that despite the difficulties with the birth because I helped myself to the disability from there, but I do not regret that I have a child, so I lost two children, how can you talk like that? I do not give up and do not lie in his arms in spite of everything! I give all the money for our home, but I can't accept that this woman is harassing me. My parent's apartment is not mine. And I am not an heiress but a child. I have given up an inheritance and I have given everything to my child. I don't think there's anything wrong with me, or am I wrong? I just can't understand why he treats me like that, and always after talking to my mother-in-law. As for the social status, I want to tell you that with BGN 550 they are not enough for just a little, and I am not at work, and I'm helping with something like homework, you don't seem to understand me again. There was respect until the moment when this woman did not come to my house and when she left I did not have BGN 90, but I am not told about this topic, because my dear 25 proved that she took them because she is a coward, she admitted in front of the police, but there was no way people were obliged to investigate and her fingerprints were everywhere. I have nothing more to say!

   Author, I understood you very well, but you did not understand me. I'm sick - it doesn't mean I'm disabled, I'm unemployed - it doesn't mean home work for BGN 400 and a pension of 150 "I gave birth to a child, I almost died, but on the other hand ??? ... there is no one!" is your personal choice. We can't blame your husband for giving birth. In the last words you prove malice. The mother-in-law was at home, money disappeared and I called the police. Why she called the police didn't know she was taking them or she just wanted you to punish her, to expose her in public. To expose her to her son, you think that with this action her son will hate her, but you are wrong. It is very difficult for children to hate their parents, especially after coming of age, she is a mother to him if she is the lowest gypsy. You must have hurt him that way many times, and now you want her and him to respect you. No way! You want me to respect you after your lies just because you're disabled. Most disabled people think that everything is forgiven only because of telk, but people can only forgive you if you have mental disorders and you think with your head. You do bad to your husband and his parent, then why doesn't he respect me, my husband. If someone exposes your family to the public, will you respect them? I even wonder what else he does with you, you must be holding him with self-pity or with the child. Get it out of your head that society is to blame for your condition. You attack your husband's mother, not you, she just defends herself. Even if she stole, even if she was lazy, even if she was the lowest, she raised and raised her child so that he would tolerate you, continue to take care of you, despite all your shortcomings / I'm not talking about disability, it's not a disadvantage / even if you like it / when it doesn't offend you / I can only say Evalla to your husband. Any wife if she calls the police against her husband's mother (whatever she is) will not only be insulted but beaten, perhaps.

   I wish you everything you wished for nothing more to happen to you, and I ask the moderator not to allow this user under numbers 25, 26 anymore. Here we share, it is not a court. I don't need attacks.

   28 Thank you for your wishes, because I have not wished you anything bad, may God hear you, so that nothing bad happens to me. Since there is nothing offensive in my comments under №25, 27, the moderator has no reason not to allow me. I didn't condemn you, I just explained to you not to look the fever in someone else's eye but to look at the beam in yours. I have the right to comment on which topic I want, the fact that you almost wish it is your personal choice.

   I have no sympathy at all for mothers who have lived for their children all their lives and then get angry when their son has children and a wife. And from such men who can not solve their personal problems with their mothers further. This is not life - some heartless woman and a foreign woman - to poison your life, just because you have gathered with some mollusk that cannot put it in its place. Well, I don't have to look after him and the children and him alone, or a woman who has no normal human relationship with me and I have never met a greater evil than her. I love myself and my life more - when he doesn't love me, I don't love them either. These things are felt and always reciprocal.