There Is No Tunnel For Light

Hello! I wander through the surprises that life presents to me extremely bravely, and here I am again faced with an obstacle, stronger than me, so I ask you for help, who can do what. I have a serious friend ... I had. A few weeks ago, things went downhill and there was an unexpected turn for me. I was brutally upset and humiliated in front of my friends in the center of Sofia in the middle of the night. I will not go into detailed, I will just mention that everything happened because a stranger came to help me while my friend refused to pay attention to my problem. The help was expressed in a simple helping hand, which became the reason for the whole company to become a real Hell in the evening. For my friend, it was infidelity. A few days later he openly insulted my friends, demonstrated a definite lack of morality and respect I felt terribly crushed. Because of this man, I had not seen most of my male friends for months, and some for a year. We had a two-hour conversation in which I made it clear that I could no longer do so. I met my best friend today. I hadn't seen him in months (he and my boyfriend can't stand each other before we're together, which means at least 6 years). He is a real gentleman. We had an amazing afternoon. We even lay like a dez on the grass (I've always been a fan of staring at clouds and talking to him ... since we were little). I felt secure, loved. Without realizing it, we drifted somewhere between the sweet talk and the strange clouds and ... we held hands in the familiar friendly way. He told me a minute later that I was still not indifferent to him. He didn't want me to answer, as always — he didn't need these things. I stood like an electric shock all afternoon, and yet in his arms — no kisses, no explanations. Eventually I wanted to leave and he sent me away ... of course we didn't want to let go. I had to push him. I justified that I have a lot of work to do with my upcoming exhibition and luggage to pack. I'm leaving tomorrow. My friend won't send me — I don't want him there — and I'll handle it myself. I don't know what to do - this person is obsessed with me. We broke up and before - it was tragic - he was standing under my window, watching me ... it was hell. I can't go through it again. You will ask why am I with him again "He managed to fool me into changing." I'm one of those people who doesn't like to end, doesn't like to leave others and yes, I've suffered ... I just can't handle myself. Please give advice on what to do. I'm too confused and I tend to believe my sister that I just don't think soberly to want to give a chance to a man like my so-called SERIOUS FRIEND, who is jealous of me from the air, and even from my sister. To tell you the truth, I don't shine with surprising beauty to say why there is a normal blue-eyed girl, but my friend claims that these eyes are the cause of everything, and my best friend says he would never limit those eyes. because they are trusted. I do not know what to do. Help! All this affects my work, my family ... I'm worried about what will happen while I'm not in Sofia ... I'm worried that the person I'm talking about is sometimes aggressive and vindictive ... and even from my sister. To tell you the truth, I don't shine with astonishing beauty to say why I am a normal blue-eyed girl, but my friend claims that these eyes are the cause of everything, and my best friend says he would never limit those eyes. because they are trusted. I do not know what to do. Help! All this affects my work, my family ... I'm worried about what will happen while I'm not in Sofia ... I'm worried that the person I'm talking about is sometimes aggressive and vindictive ... and even from my sister. To tell you the truth, I don't shine with astonishing beauty to say why there is a normal blue-eyed girl, but my friend claims that these eyes are the cause of everything, and my best friend says he would never limit those eyes. because they are trusted. I do not know what to do. Help! All this affects my work, my family ... I'm worried about what will happen while I'm not in Sofia ... I'm worried that the person I'm talking about is sometimes aggressive and vindictive ...