The Road To Infidelity ....

Hello, to everyone from "Share" !!!! I just want this weight in my chest to ease a little ... To share about what confuses me and makes me suffer ... it's weird. Sorry for the spelling mistakes, if there are any, it's just my moment. I have been married for 8 years. I have two wonderful children ... I don't work .. My husband doesn't give it to me .. I'm only at home hahaha if that's funny .... He makes good money for both of them .. I take care of the household, the children ... and only that. I miss my friends ... he distances me from them. He keeps me at a distance even from my relatives ... He doesn't even let me talk on the phone .. I feel trapped in this marriage .. Like a bird in a cage that wants to fly ... And every time I want to talk, he avoids the topic and just doesn't listen to me ... I'm tired of this life ... of loneliness ... He is away from home for weeks ... at work ... He travels constantly. I want to talk to someone to share .. but no one .. For some time I've been writing on Skype with a lot an interesting man who strangely made me look at the life I live ... This is ... The absurdity of my rotten life ... With my husband many. we became estranged ... I know that there is another ... for maybe 3 years. more because of our children .. I know that he is here because of them. With this interesting man, who has been writing to me for 6 months now ... I feel weird ... especially exciting. We've been talking on the phone lately. I like ... a lot of it. I don't know if it's a mistake. Is it normal ... I still don't know ?? All I know is that children will suffer the most. This man wants to see me .. MN. is nice ... i know he wants sex from me .. but i want that too .. am i guilty that I need attention .. a little tenderness .. to feel like a woman again ... to smile ... Well, I'm alone all day .. and he's gone .. Even when he's here he's tired and I don't pays no attention .. (I feel a special guilt .. I don't know why ... maybe because I longed for another man ...) I won't exaggerate .. but I'm quite sexy .. Men have always liked me .. They look at me ... but I've never been with anyone. a man besides mine ... And here I will say that I got married as a child. So I just wanted to share .. what bothers me .. (I even seem to be relieved). I'm about to cheat ... and I was firmly against it ... (Well, yes, he cheats on me ... but I didn't want to) ... Ohh, it's going to happen, that's a fact. That's what it's especially for me now. I am very confused. Thanks to those who read this and don't judge me please ... I'm confused enough ... to feel like a woman again ... to smile ... I am alone all day .. and he is not there .. Even when he is here he is tired and does not pay any attention to me .. (I feel a special guilt. I don't know why ... maybe because I longed for another man ...) I won't exaggerate .. but I'm pretty sexy .. Men have always liked me .. They look at me ... but I've never been with others. a man except for mine ... And here I will say that I got married as a child. So I just wanted to share .. what bothers me .. (I even seem to be relieved). I'm about to cheat ... and I was firmly against it ... (Well, yes, he cheats on me ... but I didn't want to) ... Ohh, it's going to happen, that's a fact. That's what it's especially for me now. I am very confused. Thanks to those who read this and don't judge me please ... I'm confused enough ... to feel like a woman again ... to smile ... I am alone all day .. and he is not there .. Even when he is here he is tired and does not pay any attention to me .. (I feel a special guilt. I don't know why ... maybe because I longed for another man ...) I won't exaggerate .. but I'm pretty sexy .. Men have always liked me .. They look at me ... but I've never been with others. a man except for mine ... And here I will say that I got married as a child. So I just wanted to share .. what bothers me .. (I even seem to be relieved). I'm about to cheat ... and I was firmly against it ... (Well, yes, he cheats on me ... but I didn't want to) ... Ohh, it's going to happen, that's a fact. That's what it's especially for me now. I am very confused. Thanks to those who read this and don't judge me please ... I'm confused enough ... Even when he's here he's tired and doesn't pay any attention to me .. (I feel a special guilt .. I don't know why ... maybe because I longed for another man ...) I won't exaggerate .. but I'm pretty sexy .. Men have always liked me .. They look at me ... but I have never been with others. a man besides mine ... And here I will say that I got married as a child. So I just wanted to share .. what bothers me .. (I even seem to be relieved). I'm about to cheat ... and I was firmly against it ... (Well, yes, he cheats on me ... but I didn't want to) ... Ohh, it's going to happen, that's a fact. That's what it's especially for me now. I am very confused. Thanks to those who read this and don't judge me please ... I'm confused enough ... Even when he's here he's tired and doesn't pay any attention to me .. (I feel a special guilt .. I don't know why ... maybe because I longed for another man ...) I won't exaggerate .. but I'm pretty sexy .. Men have always liked me .. They look at me ... but I have never been with others. a man except for mine ... And here I will say that I got married as a child. So I just wanted to share .. what bothers me .. (I even seem to be relieved). I'm about to cheat ... and I was firmly against it ... (Well, yes, he cheats on me ... but I didn't want to) ... Ohh, it's going to happen, that's a fact. That's what it's especially for me now. I am very confused. Thanks to those who read this and don't judge me please ... I'm confused enough ... Men have always liked me ... They look at me ... but I've never been with others. a man besides mine ... And here I will say that I got married as a child. So I just wanted to share .. what bothers me .. (I even seem to be relieved). I'm about to cheat ... and I was firmly against it ... (Well, yes, he cheats on me ... but I didn't want to) ... Ohh, it's going to happen, that's a fact. That's what it's especially for me now. I am very confused. Thanks to those who read this and don't judge me please ... I'm confused enough ... Men have always liked me .. They look at me ..., but I've never been with others. a man besides mine ... And here I will say that I got married as a child. So I just wanted to share .. what bothers me .. (I even seem to be relieved). I'm about to cheat ... and I was firmly against it ... (Well, yes, he cheats on me ... but I didn't want to) ... Ohh, it's going to happen, that's a fact. That's what it's especially for me now. I am very confused. Thanks to those who read this and don't judge me please ... I'm confused enough ...