You must have read a lot of stories. And no doubt you have encountered the image of the "evil stepmother" - the second wife, represented only by the negative side: envious, greedy, bad… But as we know, there are no black and white characters in life and we must think: Who created this insidious image? Isn't it the child who finds it hard to bear the thought that his father loves another woman who is NOT his mother? Who is the evil stepmother in our time? This is a woman, like everyone else, who fights for her right to love, home and her own family. And he has that right, like everyone else! But there is another factor, another "mountain" to overcome. Envy and malice are the product of unsuccessful people, of those who have suffered some loss, failure. The first wife's dissatisfaction is almost always passed on to the child, and it is her weapon to destroy the ex-husband's new love. Even more so if the evil stepmother is not as ugly as in fairy tales, but a beautiful, attractive and talented woman. And suddenly става SHE becomes a stumbling block, especially if the DAUGHTER is looking for competition with her. As in fairy tales. But in reality it is often the opposite. The "evil stepmother" suffers undeserved reproaches and insults, endures unworthy behavior, not because she deserves it, but simply because SHE is the NEW, LOVED, CHOSEN. She gives much more than she should, but she is not obliged to. She is obliged to have correct behavior, but there is no such attitude towards her. She suffers. Yes. Like any other woman who feels the presence of a third person in her love affair. The modern stepmother is a victim of foreign complexes and old enmities. But she, like everyone else is a free person with the right to choose. And she must choose her personal happiness! It will be truly understood only if the DAUGHTER one day becomes the EVIL STEPMOTHER herself. And this is quite likely! Shouldn't the tales be rewritten? !!
Answers 12
Did you experience it yourself to write it? I grew up with a stepmother and I can tell you that this woman was not a victim at all, it was me. Humiliations, insults, exploitation, crushing of the fragile child's psyche, ridicule. In our latitudes, this is a mass model. In addition, her native child grew up with beautiful clothes, private lessons and prestigious schools, while I walked with torn clothes, tears in my eyes and the pain of mental and physical violence. A positive example of this is on TV TLS a woman forgets her cigarette and the baby is badly burned, abandons it and leaves the father finds a stepmother who watches like an eagle over this child who finds it difficult to dress and take care of himself. Such love, I watched and cried and wondered why my stepmother was harassing me so much. We keep in touch now, and because it's very fashionable, when he tells me I love you, I just start laughing. If she had told me when I was little, now there is someone to tell you. I love you.
Number 1, do you have claims on a stranger to you? She is nothing to you and does not have to take care of you, and even less to love you. It was your parents who owed you, not her. Apparently the woman is a good mother, as long as she took perfect care of her own child.
Your story is the classic version. And my alternative. There are both options, different people, different situations. You yourself give an example of this with the stepmother who watches over the baby.
N 2 the woman may have been a good mother to her own child, but living in a house and her attitude towards me showed how evil and bad a person she really is. I was a minor left without a mother in kindergarten. And we're not talking about love, we're talking about respect for hypocrisy after 20 years, and everything she's done to say, I love you. And she didn't take care of me, I washed my clothes myself from the age of 7, I took on responsibilities such as shopping, ironing, cleaning. The shopping bag was dragged on the ground because of my height and weight. She eventually kicked me out of the house and my father could not resist her strength or character and malice. I was a child that all the neighbors set an example, quietly, respectfully, folded. Today I bear the scars of their childhood, of my father's carelessness and her inhumanity. She also met with a psychologist, he wondered how I had survived and not gone astray, but as you wrote, it was my father's fault that he had allowed all this to happen. Telling stories from our family cohabitation, the psychologist asked why my father did not put it in place and did not instill respect and boundaries at home. I can write for hours, but only a person who grew up without love, care and respect can understand it. And when you have such a childhood, how does it affect your future. Nothing justifies her outrage. how it affects your future. Nothing justifies her outrage. how it affects your future. Nothing justifies her outrage.
number 1. The story here refers to children who have mothers and they interfere insidiously and cunningly in the life of the second wife, be it by extortion for money or other insidious acts. As I said, you are describing the classic story of a child left without a mother. The emphasis of this story is different.
Why didn't you go to your mother's parents? That you did housework in your own family is perfectly normal, let me tell you. Or do you think that your father, after being with her, brought you an eagle and a maid? How good you are and how bad she is to me comes a little more. This is just your point of view, which is extremely subjective. And how exactly did he evict you and how old were you? If it weren't after the age of 19, because that's normal, too. Safe from extreme sacrifices your age, you know!
There is no woman in the world who loves another's child, especially if they force it on her. And let's take the Bible as an example, a holy woman like Sarah sends Ishmael, the stranger's child, into the wilderness. You can't be forced to love, as the saying goes, more or less ... Moreover, lately some mothers, created by such a generation, can't stand it. let alone be tolerated by strangers and love them on top of everything! It doesn't work, it just doesn't work!
As history has said, things are neither black nor white. I know a story about a stepmother, but with a happy ending. Many years ago there was a family. A man, a woman and their two children, a boy and a girl. However, for reasons unknown to me, the woman was unhappy and often depressed, over time things got worse and finally a tragedy happened ... the woman committed suicide. The man was left alone with two small children. He did not know how to take care of them and so he found a nice woman to help him raise them. And the woman managed. Although she never married their father and never had children of her own, the children loved her like a mother because they were very young when their mother died and they hardly remembered her. And so years passed, their father grew old and died, and then the children, who had long since ceased to be children but had their own families, decided that although this woman was not officially their father's wife, she deserved to be treated as his widow and given the due share of the inheritance. And so this woman lived to a ripe old age loved by all, and many years later her grandson, the son of girls she raised as a mother, told me, "My grandmother was the most amazing person I know!" Yes , he called her "my grandmother". So much for the issue of evil stepmothers. Besides, I'm a stepmother right now. In the sense that my boyfriend and I met late, we both have previous relationships, and he has a child. The girl is now a teenager and does not live with us but with her mother, but it was great when she once said to me: "I don't have a brother or sister, but it would be great if you and your father have a baby!" Well, we're working on it. ...:
It is perfectly normal for a child not to accept his parents' new relationships well. I say this from experience, because ours have been separated for years and it was not easy for me when they got new boyfriends, etc. So it is perfectly fine for a small child not to accept his father's new wife or the new husband. to his mother. Especially when it comes to the stepmother, the daughter does not accept her, because there is a female jealousy and comparison with the real mother. However, it would be difficult for a girl to accept a "new mother" in her life. It is possible that one day I will become an evil stepmother, but tell her, did you have a stepmother or a stepfather at the time? Because if you had, you will be aware of what the new relationship of one of the parents means for a child. And when a woman leaves with a man who has children, she must be prepared that these things are ahead of her. If you're worried about people's malice, believe me, that not only stepmothers face this and it is more important not what people will say, but whether the man next to you supports and loves you. If you were the "evil stepmother," know that it is partly your own fault that you left with a man who has children from another. It was certainly not easy for you, but evil stepmothers are not the only women who tolerate envy and bad talk. P. p. The tales are not only rewritten, they themselves are not fictions, but only retellings of real stories that have been passed on by word of mouth and have been reworked, censored, etc., until they have reached their present form. In the tales of Snow White and Hansel and Gretel, there is initially no such thing as an evil stepmother. In the original versions, the real mothers of these children are trying to get rid of them. With Snow White it is clear - envy, jealousy, female vanity, which surpasses the mother's love. And Hansel and Gretel's mother made their father leave them in the woods, not because she hated them, but because they were starving and many people were forced to make that choice at a time when stories were being retold. So the image of the "evil stepmother" in fairy tales appears later with the emergence of Christianity. The Brothers Grimm's tales then had to be reworked to be a kind of "correct" faith because "the mother already had a sacred image." At least that's what I've read in various forums. Today, fairy tales are very different from their original form. And they don't have to be rewritten, and we have to grow up and understand them as adults, not as children. but because they were starving and many people were forced to make that choice at a time when stories were being retold. So the image of the "evil stepmother" in fairy tales appears later with the emergence of Christianity. The Brothers Grimm's tales then had to be reworked to be a kind of "correct" faith because "the mother already had a sacred image." At least that's what I've read in various forums. Today, fairy tales are very different from their original form. And they don't have to be rewritten, and we have to grow up and understand them as adults, not as children. but because they were starving and many people were forced to make that choice at a time when stories were being retold. So the image of the "evil stepmother" in fairy tales appears later with the emergence of Christianity. The Brothers Grimm's tales then had to be reworked to be a kind of "correct" faith because "the mother already had a sacred image." At least that's what I've read in various forums. Today, fairy tales are very different from their original form. And they don't have to be rewritten, and we have to grow up and understand them as adults, not as children. to be a kind of "correct" faith because "the mother already had a sacred image." At least that's what I've read in various forums. Today, fairy tales are very different from their original form. And they don't have to be rewritten, and we have to grow up and understand them as adults, not as children. to be a kind of "correct" faith because "the mother already had a sacred image." At least that's what I've read in various forums. Today, fairy tales are very different from their original form. And they don't have to be rewritten, and we have to grow up and understand them as adults, not as children.
Every child thinks that his father is his property. Many women are deluded that after their divorce, they will be able to continue to ask their ex for endless money and time. In most cases, he finds a new wife and builds a new family, he has other children. Due to the jealousy of the children from the first marriage, little by little they are isolated from the new family and out of hatred for the second woman they start with the nonsense about the evil stepmother.
One day it will become clear who you are and what you are like
There are good stepmothers only in American movies. However, I am referring as a stepmother to a woman who brought her child (s) and found one with her new husband. Also - the "specific" option - the mother has died. As a variety - the stepmother is respectable, well-built, and the father's "angels" are not very strong (and he drinks) ... Besides, she is quite cunning, mean, downright insidious when it comes to her child. She said this to herself in moments of revelation. I, as a welder, could write a novel, not a fairy tale. However, I see no point in doing so. Especially considering the end result: hardened in difficulties and meanness, I learned to take care of my own life and I achieved a lot. Her children barely finished 8th grade and somehow survive ...