The Fool And The Wind Doll

Some time ago, when I was quite young, assertive and full of hope, I loved to sit and reflect on life. As a person with limited mental potential, I saw life very simply. I needed a twisted pretty girl to look me in the eye and flutter her eyes as much as possible. In general, over time, I decided that this was very, very appropriate and maybe it was time to follow my dreams. It turned out that it is not so difficult to implement or who knows, maybe the irony of fate is to give us exactly what we want. So one day it was too late for any thoughts, simply because I had fallen in love with a very beautiful, very desirable and young girl. Many roses followed, many promises, many mutual hopes. As an average fool, I thought I didn't have to think at times like that, but just to feel and follow the unforgettable moments. If it was beautiful, there was not a gram of sober thought in my head, I could see only her beautiful body, imagining that after a while we would both be in bed drowned in sweat and ecstasy. Viewed from today, we used the words and noble lies to each other as a rest and a prelude to these same bed moments. The following monologues from her side were vividly printed: "I have never fallen in love like this, you are the most amazing man" "I have had men, I have been with them, but I have not loved any of them" "I would do anything for you , I would follow you everywhere "These words affected my libido so much that just thinking about them at that moment, I could finish several times. The most interesting thing in this case were not the words spoken, and that I believed her every word unconditionally. How much does a good, humble, never muttering fool need? The clock was ticking, the dates were changing and counting down two years, filled with just as much sex, beautiful words, and here and there cards and gifts that were supposed to strengthen this healthy and rational relationship. Over time, we have approached the so-called shelf life, the third year, which characterizes the transition from autumn to winter. We talked less and less, if ever. The windy period began, when it was much easier to look at the other, to discover his flaws and shortcomings, to talk about them than to look at oneself or see the situation as two people who should pronounce the syllable "WE ', as a whole. The strange thing was that as a prominent representative, a member of the order and a leader of the horde of fools, I still harbored hope and looked boldly at our relationship. I imagined everything in pink, everything as before, with the same enthusiasm and desire for common bed performances and noble lies. She was far more practical, far less deluded and stupid than I was. While I dreamed of repeating all this between us, of consolidating these positions and of committing ourselves to eternal love, she had focused on completely different things. It was far easier and more practical for her to stick to her windy temper. All those words he said before, about love, that he loved only me, that he wanted to be only with me, were replaced by far more useful accusations, attacks and search for the evil spirit in my being. A few months later, this hurricane decided to lift me a long way above the ground.

As a prominent fool and a less oriented person, I wondered if I was flying, whether I was going up or down. All this was caused by a not so long and meaningful conversation, in which I was told the following: "You're cool, you're not a bad boy, I love you, but things are not going well and from now on we will not be together" Of course followed by no such a short list of shortcomings. The emphasis was mostly on how irresponsible I was, how I couldn't be more than what I was. Of course, for the uneducated in family wars, it is clear that the common denominator between all these words and at the same time synonymous with them is the expression "You don't have a penny, my man, I was cool, nice, but I can't do it with a bare ass." was any fool who considered himself a normal person, with some normal moral values, which really cannot be exceeded. In the end, we are what we are, the acceptance that you do not become a business, you do not become a thief, you do not become a murderer, in which case you have to work not so promising work, to earn money in proportion to your work and to live your miserable life. The main emphasis was clear, the direction also: Middle finger, pointing to the horizon, leading to the settlement "fuck you". Yes, she had chosen this direction for me. Of course, all this, not without the help of her friends, who were just as hungry, thirsty and hopeless as I was, just like her. But the wind is a strange thing, it creates the feeling of flight if you spread your arms, especially if it's all soaked up with a lot of clichés and spending most of the time in a fashion chalga club. Of course after a long time, I, when the naive fool becomes a complete fool, usually sees that, for example, before and after me there were these same statements, about unconditional and incredible love, everything before and after the present moment is crossed out, for better or for worse. It can also be seen that before and after me there were different types. There were rich people, there were smart people, there were rational people, or just as stupid people as I was. What they all have in common is that we all set off with the middle finger and in the direction of the direction when the wind touched the hair and when something was still not enough for her "de ja vu". But enough about her and her windy ideas, thoughts and morals.

What happened to the fool then you ask? When an ordinary fool matures and becomes a complete fool, he usually has to get used to that thought, to come to terms with what he is, and not just to look away and wonder when one day he will fly on par with the birds chased by the wind. Then somehow everything looks better, then even the windmill ideas, people and their words seem to go unnoticed, then somehow you no longer believe in windmills and start looking for something that cannot be seen with the naked eye. You no longer believe unconditionally, you don't use many words to show someone that you love them, but you try to emphasize the actions, expecting the same from the other person. You don't expect someone to give you a new inspired life, or to complement you or create something new from you, the only thing you want, one day, someone to accept you as stupid as you are and on top of that, not because of ridicule, fun or an influx of Phoenician signs, but because this nonsense would be devilishly charming and meaningful.