Hello, my story is again about the mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship, but I think my husband also has a major role here. His father went abroad and abandoned them as children, he grew up with his mother and brother. That's probably why he's so attached to her, unlike his brother, who looks after his family and doesn't care much about them. I also had a difficult childhood - with a sick mother and a drunken father. That's why I have known how to work and manage on my own since I was a child. Instead of helping my parents, I only got problems. I finished my education, got a book, found a good job in my specialty, and when I met him, everything seemed to work out. From the very beginning, however, I was impressed that his mother is one of those frivolous people who are always waiting for someone else to fix their troubles, he doesn't think ahead, he drives her day after day at all. To some extent, he has caught a lot of her habits. And here, we have been married for two years, still with children. We live in Sofia, in his apartment, and I return to my hometown only on holidays - there is no one to go to anymore. And here's the problem - for these two years, his mother repeatedly made him take out loans of about 10-15 thousand, because she had no money. Let me clarify that she works for a four-figure sum and lives alone in their other apartment.
I tried to tell him it wasn't right, but he wouldn't listen. The icing on the cake happened a month ago when they took out a mortgage. Naturally, he will not see any money from it, although at the moment we are repairing the apartment we live in because it has leaked. While we wonder how to find money, he takes out a loan for her. I got angry and couldn't stand it, I made a scandal. However, he he somehow found me guilty and told me that he had no choice because otherwise his mother would hang herself, she urgently needed the money. And I thought. I wondered if I wanted children from this man. I love him endlessly and we get along great, but if at any of her suicide threats he does something stupid, how far will we get? On the other hand, I'm not small anymore, I'm approaching 30 and I can't just throw everything away.
1 jmacnamra20 answered
You can do more, run while it's time. It's awful not to respect you and blindly follow your mother's whims. This will not change, and when you have children, it will be even harder for you.