The Child Drove Me Crazy

   Accept that it is normal for the child to get to know the world and do mischief during this period. Don't waste your nerves on nonsense every day. Shouting and fighting will not solve the problems, they will only deepen them. Be calm, not hysterical, to listen and respect you.

   We all go through this. Same with me. But I'm 39 and my son is 5. When I'm home it's calmer. He tries to do his tricks in front of me, but when he lowers his tone and frowns, everything disappears and he starts looking guilty and picking his nails. When he's alone with his mother, it's a miracle. I know and understand very well what it does. More than once I see them, he whimpers and continues to defend his intentions in every way. More than once he talked to his mother to stop following him and to please him for everything. Every child breaks, spills white. At this age, they begin to stand out as a person. Your nerves, the slaps on the ass, the outbursts, it feels them and to some extent understands. From there, the child gets nervous. You talk a little through your teeth and it already understands that the situation is annoying. I know very well how difficult it is to remain "supposedly" indifferent, but this is the way. Let him make white. No matter how expensive they are. This condition will gradually disappear. I do not advise you to take antidepressants, although the weak help. Try not to show and shout at him and in two or three days you will see the difference. If he made trouble, take his hand, lower his voice, and slowly explain to him why he shouldn't do it and what he did. No slaps and nerves. And a bad mother is the one who abandoned a child! Try it and I will be happy to succeed. he lowered his voice and slowly explained to him why he shouldn't do so and what he had done. No slaps and nerves. And a bad mother is the one who abandoned a child! Try it and I will be happy to succeed. he lowered his voice and slowly explained to him why he shouldn't do so and what he had done. No slaps and nerves. And a bad mother is the one who abandoned a child! Try it and I will be happy to succeed.

   Well, the reality is, you really can't do it as a parent. What you can do is go to a psychologist. And one or two walks will definitely not be enough. I suspect you were a psychologist long before you gave birth. A lot of parents bg parents are like you, and worse, but this should not reassure you in any case.

   Calm down, it's age, take it easy. And what if he got dirty, let him clean up, otherwise there are no children, etc. Make him know it won't be his. I have beaten my daughter both lightly and not very lightly, she is 4 at the moment, she understands everything and does the opposite again. There is no point in farting, only as a last resort, at least for some children it makes no sense. You punish or try with good, to do something and get something in return, which, of course, is something meaningful. Such are the children, but I am on your side because I am the "bad father." Well, there must be a bad one, otherwise things become uncontrollable. This is the situation :)

   I've heard that the boys are quite violent. I do not know this, because I have a girl of 1 year and 3 months. She is very cheerful, gentle and meek. Only at night does a particle wake up because of its teeth. Aren't you more nervous and the child doesn't feel you? Do you give him love, do you hug, do you play with him? Do you feed him well, etc.?

   The father is the one who must teach him to listen to his mother! Talk to him :)

   "I forgot to say that he listens to his father and has respect for him ..." - I think that's the problem. His father took his fear, so he gets on your head. If your husband does not stand by your side, you will raise a spoiled child, who, when he becomes a teenager, will drive everyone crazy at home, and will even get drugs! You can't fight, fight donkey after donkey, only your husband, if he is serious and reasonable, can be useful, and the grandfather should not interfere, at most he should go for a walk.

   You please him a lot, so he allows himself - young children test the limits and subconsciously feel with whom, what they can afford. Start ignoring him, not talking to him and punishing him with indifference when he behaves unacceptably instead of overwhelming him with attention, even if it is negative. These habits, with tantrums and thrashing, if you don't eradicate them now, you will see yourself in a miracle in the future. Leave him alone or turn your back on him and ignore him like a roar - when he starts breaking things or shaking to provoke you, stay cool and try to get exactly the opposite of what he wants every time such an event occurs! And take it easy - these nerves are not for you in one day, you stare at this child too much, divert a little attention to feeling good in your skin again, this will be better for the child too :)

   We give you advice on how to raise your child. We do not know the environment in which he is brought up, you may be the problem for this condition.

   First, the child is not guilty of breaking and smearing. He is at that age. Accept that you will be constantly cleaning until he learns. You can't beat him for that. You are hurting his dignity and he will not respect you. Especially to make scenes to hit the wall. Apparently the hysteria in you has peaked. If you need a break, rest, but do not panic in front of the child, because it will only get worse. Give it to a kindergarten, let it learn to take care of itself, and for you to rest. And I'm 30 and I have a child of 3. It's the same with us. Scratching the walls, smearing, aka in the pants, it is necessary with roars and banging. He says that he does not urinate and after 1 minute he urinates 4 times a day. This is the situation at 3 years old. You talk to him, you give him an example and one day when he turns 20 you squeeze your thumbs to become a good and educated person. But don't beat him when he's angry because I won't listen to you, it will only get worse. Good luck.

   At 30, you don't know how to raise children. You don't become a mother, then why did you get married. Have you attended lectures on raising children by young parents. I doubt. He has respect for his father, but not for you. Why?

   You've needed psychologists since you were a year old. I predict another year and you will need psychiatrists for the child ... it's too late for you.

   First, don't care if the child has broken something or if it has gotten dirty. If you break your toys, throw them away, stop buying and replace them, when you run out of toys you will smell. YOU ARE NOT A BAD PARENT! Your grandfather and husband undermine your authority and the child copies. He does what he wants because he knows that he will run to his grandfather and he will hug him and even give him a reward. I listen to your husband because when he says something everyone at home performs and you and grandpa, when you tell your husband to come to the kitchen for a while he shouts is they can't watch the match. The child may do these things on purpose because he has discovered that it is your fault and he gets the benefits. The children are smart and know how to use us, they have a book "Help! My child is driving me crazy" you can read.

   Well, so are the children. Speak to him calmly, quietly explain to him why you do not want to do this or that. Offer him another interesting activity.

   7, girl, rainbow, particle, teeth, baby ..... Black!

   Woman, rejoice that you have a healthy child, you know which children stand quiet and look at one point. You remember how their mothers dream of getting up, playing and breaking something. Show him your love and joy for your child and try to be calm. Or really go to a specialist, you may have an illness, depression or something else.

   I am not a parent and I do not even have the desire or intention to get up. I clicked on the topic out of curiosity, I guess like hundreds of other people. I was expecting comments that would recommend beating, aggression, it is clear to me that even though we are already in the 21st century, there are still such people, but I really can't explain the reaction to number 7 - what is this malice towards her speech? She didn't say anything offensive. What a bad name in the words 'girl, rainbow, particle, teeth, child', what have so many teased 19 and his supporters? Don't all parents of small children say that? And in general, all the parents, all the people who looked after a baby? I, being a woman who doesn't want children, aren't annoyed by such words / well, they don't affect me at all;) /, and you ... How so, why?

   There are great lectures by educators and child psychologists on youtube. I remember a very good one for emotional intelligence, others for early childhood development, for shaking, etc., which will help you realize and accept that this "naughtiness" is curiosity, interest and should be encouraged and encouraged. to learn to realize them together with your child in a positive and healthy way. Remember that the child is not listening. If you are nervous and aggressive, so be it. It is a mirror of your inner state, you will most effectively change his behavior, changing your attitude. This does not mean just stopping screaming and pounding, but learning calm, wisdom that will help you transform destructive energy into creative. Calm down, get information and work.

   The bad parent will not seek help and will not suffer from his behavior. You are not a bad parent, just an inexperienced and ignorant person. Young children are often hyperactive, especially boys, and this is an indication that you have a normally developing, healthy and curious child. First, take sedatives, herbal pills and take maximum doses. It is obvious that you are both unhappy due to ignorance. You are unhappy, because for you a 3-year-old child has to behave like an adult and be well-trained (to control himself, not to try to impose himself, to deal only, to keep neat and clean), you do not realize the fact that since it is even difficult for you to control your reactions, you are already a big person with responsibilities, how do you think a 3-year-old child will have mature behavior? You can expect mature behavior only after at least 18 years. Your child, on the other hand, is unhappy because he is probably used to having to be called, to have drama, to feel good, and this is the right pattern of behavior. Most likely he constantly hears - no, don't, don't touch, reproaches, prohibitions, etc. The good news is that there are fixes - please read the book "Wise Love" by Martha and William Piper. Human and accessible written. It will radically change your thinking. The other problem is that you are obviously unhappy yourself - you will say why, and this despair erupts in anger. It is also possible that your home is not very practically tidy as for a small child - you remove all objects and small things, remove unnecessary items, adjust the floor to be easy to clean. This will save you a lot of nerves. Finally - the child needs physical and play activities and communication with other children already. If you do not provide them to him, how can he realize his energy? And when he turns 4 - definitely a light sport! to remove excess energy.

   21, malice? This is disapproval of drooling! But if you don't like something, you immediately declare it malicious! No! it's not malice, the other is drooling and yes, we don't approve of it much in adults!

   Well, try to create an environment in which he can do the least harm. Take off the tablecloths, give him glasses with caps and other various tricks, I don't know what "whites" are. When he has something to clean, give him a rag to clean with you. The child did not come to this world learned, you have to show him what is done and what is not. Calmly, not with shouting and fighting. Maybe just by making trouble, you pay attention to him, even if in the form of a scream, think about whether it is so. It takes a lot of patience and time with a child. Take something soothing, at least mint-hawthorn-valerian, if your nerves can't stand it. You may spend it on the child because of some of your overwork, see how to organize and who can help you. Never allow yourself to raise a hand to a weaker one and never speak badly of your child. Accept it as a precious gift and treat it that way. It is very important that something spilled, it did not break something itself!

   Children and animals do what you allow them to do. There is nothing wrong with your child, author, he is just spoiled, turned into the center of attention and sees that in the relationship with you you are the weak link. He grows up as an undisciplined and rude person. Over the years, it will get on your head more and more. If your husband can't afford it, watch how your husband behaves and acts like him. He's obviously the smarter of the two of you. If you can't handle it, give it to the garden to socialize and discipline.

   It is obvious that people like this author are irreparably damaged. Most likely because their parents did not love them, they grew up in a poisonous environment and were emotionally crippled. Whatever it is, it's entirely their problem, and there's no point in constantly waving it in front of others. What he wrote 26 would make her even more angry than teach her. Because people like her are not subject to correction. That is why there are such reactions to the otherwise super meaningful statement of number 7 ...

   I also think that people like this don't really want to change at all, they just look for social approval and the like.

   The first thing I would tell you is that it's not just you. Almost all mothers are on the edge of their nervous system, even me, although my child is sensible and calm. On the one hand, your child's behavior is quite normal, on the other hand, sometimes they seek attention like that. Let him get as dirty as he wants, now is the time to discover the world. My daughter last year painted a huge picture on the wall in the living room, we deliberately left it there. Steal as much time for yourself as possible. If you have grandmothers nearby, do not hesitate to throw it at them, their main function is to look after their grandchildren. This nervous system is not for you in one day. And no, you're not a bad parent at all. And don't pay attention to those who wrote to you that you don't become a mother and the like. These are people who do not have children.

   Author, when you deal with the child, fix the spelling - "no" is written SEPARATELY from the verb! From EVERY verb, including "I know, I can, I want"!

   Try to study healthy eating and start immediately without delay. It is not bad to read many articles about aggression. Otherwise you will have the same problems forever.

   You are not crazy about the child, people like you are crazy before the birth of a child. And yes - it's outrageous since you're already a Parent! to make spelling mistakes. In this situation, what kind of role model?

   Indeed, the parent must be very careful what example he sets for his child. I do not understand why some people react negatively to the otherwise absolutely constructive criticism in this topic, which I personally think is even too softly presented and extremely insufficient. And the statement of 19 sounds to me just like a mad teenager full of malice. I wonder why in other topics that are about children, words in the diminutive form are super often used, but no one ever objects, I even bet that if someone writes such a statement as at 19 in any of these other topics related with children, not only will they not support him, but on the contrary, they will attack him furiously. Congratulations to number 7 for hinting at some truths in her speech. She is an exemplary mother. The author and the 19 supporters could only learn from her,

   36, I'm not number 19, but the statement of 7 (there are other topics in the forum of the same haho, can be recognized immediately by the statement - one wondered how to make an album for the child, the other what he would do when he grows up and how he will endure it ) sounds to me like an infantilized individual who has turned his child into the center of the world and is overwhelmed and childish as a fool for good and bad. Not to mention that her involvement in this topic is of no use to anyone - just seeking attention and trying to emphasize herself, because she obviously thinks that she can't be interesting with anything but her child. My relative behaved in a similar way and it led to absurd situations. When she gave birth, she was so proud and admired of herself and the little one that it happened when there were guests for dinner, if the topic accidentally deviated, to put the little one on the table with the candy, to see him and remember why they came. He reacted to the guests' remarks with - "but how can you be disgusted, he is so clean and sweet." 36, I don't know what they washed your head with, but this is not an exemplary mother (whatever that means) , and this type of behavior causes lasting psychological damage to the child. To the author - the child listens to your husband and accepts him as an authority. Start behaving with him in the same way as your husband - see where you are wrong, what you do differently from him, so that he can afford such outbursts in front of you. Children are constantly testing the boundaries - it is your duty to set them. Don't get so attached to him and stay a little more distant. Instead of fighting on the ass, completely ignoring not listening and shaking to see that it will not happen to his - if he breaks a toy, he will play with a broken one, if it breaks or spills anything else, you'll make it help with cleaning if it doesn't want to - you won't go for a walk or on the playground until it's done. To talk to the grandfather, not to interfere in the upbringing - there is no point in playing a good and a bad parent.

   You don't convince me about 7, 37. In my opinion, the attitude towards her in this topic is pure malice. Mass-loving mothers of young children are like her. Even in the other section recently there was a topic "for young mothers" .. something like that was. So the topic was just to rebuke them. But the reaction of many commentators was the opposite of that shown to number 7 here.

   Sign up for a gym.

   38 is right. I support 36 and I also think that the author needs fitness.