Hello, I'm a boy of 20, I can hardly imagine What exactly it is to you, from the side it always looks different (in most cases much easier to solve) than to you it actually feels like. My story is far from dramatic - seen from the side My long-awaited first girlfriend left me, from depression I got to the point that now I leave my studies abroad, I have no idea what to fill my day with, I stay at home, I feel sick and nothing I can't decide, let alone rejoice. My inner feeling is that I was born to be a Lonely One who cannot talk to People, who will never be understood and will never experience the joy of talking to a person. Anyway, my idea is this - yesterday, on another day of lonely wandering in our sea garden, totally desperate and lonely, I sat on a bench among the people. After about 10 minutes, a 17-year-old gypsy girl sat on the next bench, she looked cute, I just wanted to talk to her and THANK GOD that she asked me if you wanted to sit next to me, because I imagined saying hello to her, she laughs at me and I have to get red with embarrassment. And what happened, I spent 3 hours with him, we walked and talked - what if he was a gypsy, some of his teeth were missing, he didn't speak completely correctly and people looked at us with ridicule - did I talk to him - yes, did I drive pushy strollers with him (I hadn't done it in 10 years) - yes, and most of all - Did I feel noticed that I existed, did I feel that I had a friend by my side, even though I didn't know her at all - Yes. And although I don't know anything about her, that throughout our conversation I was afraid of losing that conversation that She encouraged, that I was ashamed and not completely calm, today I am thinking of going there again, to the sea, hoping to see her again, to talk to my new friend. TO HAPPEN SOMETHING DIFFERENT FROM MY THOUGHTS ON THIS TODAY. My idea is, go somewhere where there are people, I know you're braver than me, because you've experienced harder things, so like someone who also sits alone, and just talk to him - So you will enter at least for a while in his world, and MOST OF ALL - you will come out of your own, in which the same thoughts are constantly and incessantly spinning, exhausting you completely and making you think that there is no point in continuing to live. I wish I could hug you tightly, stand with you, because I think we humans are happiest when we know that someone is sitting next to us of their own free will, and I don't mind time passing, just sitting together, even and Non-speakers,
1 daddygotdickk answered
Well, you know - your life is yours - I'll just ask you not to catch fire and not to throw yourself under a train - there are people who want to live in peace. Now seriously - do you think that your mother would want for you? Tighten up !!! Life is ahead of you. I'm sorry about your mother, but she still lives through you today. If you kill yourself, it kills her forever - you will not create a family and children in which to continue life? and you will practically become the killer of the last of it. Is that what she wanted when she gave birth to you and separated you from her morsel for you? Look, live longer, see how things will develop - death has not escaped from anyone. You can do suicide tomorrow, but LIVE TODAY.