It's hard for me to start ... Hello! If you are reading this, welcome to my world! I'm glad that there are similar sites where I can share my story anonymously and I don't have to present what happens to my name. An 18-year-old girl is writing to you, in whose life many, many strange things are happening. I haven't shared this with anyone because ... I'm ashamed. Well, I'll share with you. Until now I have not had a boyfriend, first kiss, intimacy. It's stupid to advertise or something like that, but the truth is that I've been on dates, so to speak, male attention is not entirely lacking in the otherwise tragicomic situation I find myself in. I'm not one of those muffins who get depressed when they don't get a selfie, on the contrary, I'm a very ordinary girl, and maybe that's the problem, because my interests are directed in a completely different direction. I love reading books, to go to the theater, I am strongly connected with folklore, as I am a folk dancer, I care about family and comfort, I like all kinds of art. However, this does not fit into this mercantile, artificial world in which pure relationships are not at the forefront. Of course, this is a complex for me, but I can't admit to myself a person I don't feel, in front of whom I can really be myself ... I won't lie to you, I feel inferior, because everyone around me has already gone through these things have connections ... And the regular question is, "Why don't you have a boyfriend, what's the matter with you, you look good, you're smart" I'm desperate not to find a decent boy who really appreciates these "obsolescences." I want nothing more than pure love ... I care about family and comfort, I like all kinds of art. However, this does not fit into this mercantile, artificial world in which pure relationships are not at the forefront. Of course, this is a complex for me, but I can't admit to myself a person I don't feel, in front of whom I can really be myself ... I won't lie to you, I feel inferior, because everyone around me has already gone through these things have connections ... And the regular question is, "Why don't you have a boyfriend, what's wrong with you, you look good, you're smart?" I'm desperate not to find a decent boy who really appreciates these "obsolescences." I want nothing more than pure love ... I care about family and comfort, I like all kinds of art. However, this does not fit into this mercantile, artificial world in which pure relationships are not at the forefront. Of course, this is a complex for me, but I can't admit to myself a person I don't feel, in front of whom I can really be myself ... I won't lie to you, I feel inferior, because everyone around me has already gone through these things have connections ... And the regular question is, "Why don't you have a boyfriend, what's wrong with you, you look good, you're smart?" I'm desperate not to find a decent boy who really appreciates these "obsolescences." I want nothing more than pure love ... it's a complex for me, but I can't admit to myself a person I don't feel, in front of whom I can really be myself ... I won't lie to you, I feel inferior, because everyone around me has already gone through these things, have connections ... And the regular question is, “Why don’t you have a boyfriend, what’s the matter with you, you look good, you’re smart?” It drives me crazy! I'm desperate not to find a decent boy who really appreciates these "obsolescences." I want nothing more than pure love ... it's a complex for me, but I can't admit to myself a person I don't feel, in front of whom I can really be myself ... I won't lie to you, I feel inferior, because everyone around me has already gone through these things, have connections ... And the regular question is, “Why don’t you have a boyfriend, what’s the matter with you, you look good, you’re smart?” It drives me crazy! I'm desperate not to find a decent boy who really appreciates these "obsolescences." I want nothing more than pure love ... I'm desperate not to find a decent boy who really appreciates these "obsolescences." I want nothing more than pure love ... I'm desperate not to find a decent boy who really appreciates these "obsolescences." I want nothing more than pure love ...
Answers 14
I completely understand you, I'm a boy your age and I'm the same in this respect! I hope we find the right people for ourselves! - Х.
Well, you're the one who doesn't allow a relationship, and you ask what to do. If they don't live up to your expectations, it's obvious you have to wait. But aren't you too pretentious, with unrealistic, romantic expectations. Of course, there is still a right to claim, but not everyone is crowded with people who want me to complain so much.
The same story is with me. I have flirts with guys, but it never happens again. Our hobbies (with the author) are almost completely covered, but I'm really wondering if there is a decent person left looking for a normal relationship ...
Hey, you're a rare find these days. I admire you! And I'm sure you'll find the right person! Good luck, sweet girl. The only advice I will give you is to continue to be yourself!
Hey, get down, girl, because you have a psychological problem. :( I am professionally involved in folk dances, as well as other styles, I would not say that you hate folklore, on the contrary, everyone enjoys it. There are many young and young girls / boys who, like you, have enrolled in folk dance schools. About the books: You don't see, but I see that there are a lot of people who read books still, and I'm one of them, I think you live in a world where you think you're special and the others look weird and unsuitable for you. You are still young, you will grow up and you will not care so much about people's opinion. Fate and you decide when to have a boyfriend.
And I'm looking for such a girl! And we are not there because it is difficult to let people in :)
We can't all be the same, there are people who are more open and there are characters who are different, for example I'm beautiful for girls, I'm thin, I have the right features, perfect skin and long hair but I don't have a boyfriend, I'm just shy, many girls are they wanted to meet me and they chased me and I had to lie to them about where I live and about my bodies, I pretended to be a simpleton to get rid of them! I like to be alone and listen to music and paint, I think it will be very difficult for me to find something in common with a girl with whom I am ok together, it annoys me when there is someone who annoys me! Maybe you are like me or you are looking for something that is not there ... like "pure love", there is nothing pure in this world, so I protect myself from it! M 17
If you can't like anyone now, that's a big problem, because over time the situation will only get worse.
So you have to change your environment in some way. For example, most women really complain about how their boyfriend has not bought them something, how they are not satisfied and such. And indeed, most men expect such women, no matter how much they seem to complain about them, because such women are familiar to them and know what to do with them. But when they meet a smart woman, they run away. You have to change the environment. For example, I'm from a small town, we all know each other. Here literally only the unfortunate. It's not that they're not everywhere, but it's different, for example, to go to study somewhere or have some interest and deal with it, and to come across another contingent of people.
What you are looking for and your expectations are also important. Everyone has certain desires, over time we build a whole stereotype, but this is a mistake. It's your job to be yourself, and someone will like you if you don't look alike. My friend rarely reads books, he has an eye problem and can't last more than an hour in front of the pages. We like different movies with him, we listen to different music, our hobbies have nothing in common. But he has the same value system as me. The important thing is to want the same from your relationship. Your man may be able to play only one dance and half the traditions will be far from him, he may not read much, prefer cinema to theater, understand technology rather than art ... but if he wants at the end of the day to lie in your arms, if he wants only you and no one else, then what does it matter that you are different? Do not judge hastily, few couples have exactly the same interests and this is by no means extremely bad, it can even enrich you. Do not look for a person who is 100% like you, look for someone who will not cheat on you, will not touch you, will not shout at you for stupidity and will leave you alone with tears in your eyes. To put it mildly, it's like you don't fit into the fashion of society. Many people want fidelity, love and time.
Boys your age don't want love, there's only one thing in their head. And it's not abnormal, live first. Everything is in order. Slightly lower the criteria. For example, if someone does not like theater, it does not mean that he is not a quality person. Of course, it is important to be able to talk to the person you are with. To have common interests. But at this age the serious ones are few .. Just don't wait for the prince, there are none. Everyone has flaws. Don't feel inferior that others have relationships. Many people get along with someone so that they are not alone.
Number 5, don't scare the girl with "psychological problems". Between 15 and 18 everyone thinks of himself as special - this is quite normal for a teenager, also to feel misunderstood, to believe that he is the only one who thinks deeply, etc. By the age of 20 we already meet a lot and different people and only then do we begin to realize that we are not so special. But it is quite normal for the author to be considered different from the others, everyone at this age has gone through this. To the author - at 18 years old. Life is in front of you and you should not despair at all. At your age, I also thought that it was very important for my future boyfriend to like this and that, to be this or that. But people are not one-sided. You will fall in love and you will understand what I mean - most likely the person you will fall in love with will not be what you imagine, but it will seem to you the most incredible on earth. Be open to people - do not try to impose your interests on them, but listen to theirs. The other will only come.
Reading the title, I expected something SUPER strange to be written here, but in fact completely normal things are happening in your life. And like number 5, I think you have a distorted view of reality (although "psychological problem" is not a good term). In fact, many people enjoy folk dancing and reading. The point is, you may seem inaccessible to the masses because you put that barrier between you and them. You think of them as superficial people who do not share your interests, and you begin to behave more withdrawn, more distant. You know how our subconscious works? It is looking for ways to confirm our own beliefs. If your belief is that people don't like you because you are "weird," then your subconscious will put you in such situations and in such interpersonal dynamics as to confirm your belief. At the same time, the subconscious does not want to change, because this model is known and has ensured your survival so far, therefore it works (the subconscious is only interested in providing us with our most basic needs). Therefore, you must consciously, through your will, decide how you want to look in front of other people, but for this purpose you must also change your perception of "others".
Author, you really are a rare find nowadays. It seems to me that you do not value yourself enough, and if so, it is difficult for others to value you. Respect yourself so that the people around you respect you. I strongly believe that for everyone in this world there is a soul mate who finds him at some point in his life. Meet new people, make friends, have fun, and what needs to happen will happen anyway. Work on yourself, build yourself as a person. Do not change your interests and views, because they are values that you must keep well, and if someone can not accept you with them, then this person is simply not for you. It is true that people your age have very strange views nowadays, but not everyone is like that. However, to see this, you need to change your environment and communicate with different people. There is time for everything. You are only 18 years old and you will still get to know the world. I hope I helped you.