I no longer remember when it all started, but over time the problems became more and more and deeper. I am 26 years old. I'm smart, I'm beautiful and I would say much smarter than a lot of people who see how they live a normal life, have families, even the simplest people I know have developed more or less and lead a normal life. They work, go out and have fun with company and for me things are completely different. I've been locked up at home for years and I'm used to some way of surviving through gambling, which I know I can't do, but I play in the hope of winning and breaking away because I can't be with people. I am not sure that going to another country will change. In fact, the problem is that wherever I am among people, I immediately become the center of attention and everyone turns against me. It turns out that my thoughts and feelings control the others and everything comes back to me like a boomerang. I know, this is actually because everything is energy, but why do I always seem to take the lead and provoke people to be against me. Conspiracies begin against me and the hatred grows stronger. I'm straight with normal principles for a man, but I don't have a girlfriend. I have never been aggressive towards people, I am very sensitive and intuitive and I feel the energy impact. When I start thinking, the energy goes up in the brain and at that moment the house occurs without any communication with people, I just create reality. When I let go of the thought the energy goes down in my chest and I feel heaviness and when it goes down in my stomach there is calm and like a pause but the effort to hold this ball of energy in my stomach becomes more and more difficult. The most interesting thing is that this thing clears when I put an egg in a glass of water under the bed, the tension gradually clears.
Everything is fine, I have no problems. After a few days, everything accumulates again and deepens. I have had many nightmares at such times. One morning, opening my eyes for a moment, an old woman's face appeared on my pillow. It may have been a dream, but I had a period in which, whenever the light came on in the kitchen in the evening, the light bulb became salt. There are just so many things now that I can't share everything. I just know that everything is real because if I had a deviation it would be only in my head and I would not influence others without taking attitude. No discussion no action, no one sees me in the coffee and I hear people growling and coughing. This has been going on for 5 years now, wherever I go I cause irritation when I am calm and myself and that is why I have to be constantly under pressure to tighten up. I believe deep down I know there is a force that controls everything.
I prayed to God, I set principles not to eat meat, not to smoke, not to drink alcohol, so as not to tolerate my body, because (the feeling is as if something dirty overwhelms and strains me), I have had improvements for some time I felt radically different with minimal symptoms but only for a few days .. When I feel good, which rarely happens, maybe when I clean myself with an egg, then my life starts to go normally and I'm glad that my relationships with people are good and then everything fails and I go to hell again ... It's like something is trying to make me the dirtiest and meanest person in the world and achieve my goals. Please someone if he had similar feelings let him share or give some answer.