Hello readers! I have a friend for 7 years. We literally grew up together because we are students together and now we are 23-24. We think about marriage and children after a while, BUT there is a very big problem that bothers me very much. The problem is that he works outside the city where we live. He does not go home every night, and if he comes home it is after 10 pm (we go to bed and fall asleep because everyone is tired and has their duties the next day). When I look at other serious couples who are our age how they go out together, they live together properly like normal people and most of the time I'm alone ...
I can't even call it that we live together. We have talked about the question many times and the answer is the same "everything will be fine" every time! He does not want to find a job or do anything else in the city where we live (Varna), there are many opportunities for development here, as long as one wants and wants. I can't move to the city where he works ... for the simple reason that I'm still a student, I want to find a job in my specialty, etc. and there is no such opportunity. I told him that I would not wait for him forever until he decided what he would do with his life ... because honestly, I'm tired of being a lonely bird forever! We don't even hear from each other during the day because of his work. I'm clear he can't stick to me, but I'm really fed up and he knows it. I told him that I was already used to loneliness and without his presence, and I was starting to wonder if he would be home or not! I'm not with him just for one sex night if he comes. I love him very much ...
I know he loves me too, but he is so indecisive that he has nowhere to go !! This is driving me crazy! I haven't even thought about infidelity ... I'd rather sit alone than do something like that to him! We used to fight and then separate because of this problem, which has been going on for years, and every time it gives me empty promises and hopes and my life goes on. Some of our sets and friends are already married with a child ... and we can't live normally yet. To stay with him and wait for "things to get better" or to continue on my own without him and the empty promises! 'I say' empty 'because, as I said, it's been 4 years since I started working there (it's nice and well paid) I'm promised the same thing and finally nothing. I want him to succeed, of course ... I'm not selfish! I told him that just as I want to pursue my goals ... so he must, but this reflects on our relationship. He doesn't want to let me go, and that's it. And I'm tired.
1 studcamx answered
I don't know what to advise you either. But what I notice is that men are afraid of them. They are afraid of serious commitment, of marriage, of children. It's as if they're waiting to turn 30 and then they think about it and that it's time for them. While we do not have that time. My friend is the same. He is afraid of being tied up and is 26 years old. Even from the very thought of leaving clothes in them or a toothbrush and he shivers. I'm also starting to like this indecision and I can see the end of it. I can't spend my whole life with a person who may think tomorrow that he is not ready to have a family, but that he has created one. Run away from such indecisive men, because if for so long he has not realized that he wants you, even after 10 years it will be the same. YOU will push things, and he will just promise nothing.