Problems With Parents-angeloolegna

   Talk to them so you're not 12 13 but you're 21 22 if they get annoyed with you again you say shut up as long as you listen to them again this is your life is not theirs you have to command yourself and not you to command hopefully to make things right between you.

   Oh ..... It would be best to get away from your parents and live normally!

   Live alone this is the only way!

   And I have such a problem with my parents I will not be able to give you advice sorry sorry.

   I am almost 32 years old and now I still have this problem, but it mainly comes from my mother and grandmother. Well, for 10 years I haven't eaten at least .... It so happened in my life that I couldn't get married and I was left alone. To some extent, they are also to blame for their interventions. I would like to leave, but my financial situation is very bad and does not allow it. Now I have a friend of 2 months and I dare not tell them, I hide the relationship and a lie. He is 3 years older. He lives with his brother in his own home, which will automatically drive our people crazy, because he is not alone, ie. he cannot provide me with housing. He has a university degree, but he doesn't have a very promising job - and they'll get tired of it, even though it takes a lot of money. It's not good ... another problem. I don't think directly ... I don't think I'm the person to give you the right advice, but from experience so far I know only a few things: Try to be independent; do not share anything with them; try to make it look like you're not dating him, but girlfriends; and if you can take the two to a place to stay, that's best. Good luck

   (From the author) №5, I am very grateful for your advice! I just needed someone to tell me that he went through the same thing! My friend has already moved out, but I still can't, I don't have the strength. I told our people, and they started behaving even more unfairly with me :( But I have already decided that after the New Year, whatever happens, I will be exported. I really thank you very much for the shared story :) Good luck :)

   A very stupid act on the part of your parents I would never make my child without support. What kind of parent would make their child suffer like that. There is no greater wealth than being happy.

   You are 22 and do not depend on your parents.

   I'm Number 5. To a large extent, I think the problem is in our heads as well. We have some dependence on the parents and not so much material as some kind of respect for them and their opinion. For example, I do not want them to be unhappy and dissatisfied with me. Much depends on their approval, because it will automatically bring me peace of mind. So there is peace at home and everything is fine. Because my relationship is getting better (knocking on wood), if something more serious happens, I think I'll tell them directly before I leave us or something. It occurred to me to get pregnant first. Then there will be nothing to do. But you do not think about this option, you are still early. You always have to come up with something. But I think taking it out of you will be the best option, as long as you can afford it. I'm not talking about going to your friend's, and whether you have a relationship or not, to move out and try to be independent. I say it from experience - if I went back now, I would move out at your age. I see that I made the mistake of staying with them. Lots of wasted nerves, and it could have been better. If you have the opportunity to move out now, do not wait for the New Year.

   If you can, get out! I am 31, my mother has a serious illness and, quite understandably, she is very sensitive and worried about everything, especially me. My father is also conservative and nervous. From the age of 22, when my mother became seriously ill, and before that, I felt guilty — that I was bothering her when I wasn't home, that I wasn't home enough, that I wasn't helping, that I was disappointing her — me or the person I go out with ... And although often the parents are right in their judgment and certainly love you very much, your life is yours and you have the right to your decisions and mistakes. If you do not find a way out, one day you will become alienated from them / because you will not share, but you will be forced to lie to them / and from other people you want to be with, because it is very difficult to maintain a relationship or friendship, trying to hide it from your parents.

   Hello, for a very long time I thought that I am the only one in this world who is 25 and has problems of this type. Obviously it's hard to talk about these things. For me, the story is the same as for the author of the topic and № 5 with the difference that I have a serious friend from the honorable 8 years. All this time I have not stopped having problems with ours. Despite the fact that I have not stopped proving myself as a person, I studied and worked simultaneously throughout my studies, now I also work, I take care of them, and they do not stop harassing me. My father is a very special character, he has no pleasure. I never allowed myself to stay at night with my friend, I have the feeling that he will kill me the next day, lately he has started forbidding me to go out. FOR God's sake, I'm 25. I feel terrible. My thoughts are very confused at the moment. BUT one thing I want to share, I'm sorry, there is another with such problems. REALLY

   And I don't know what advice to give because I'm in the same situation, I'm 19, I've been going with the boy in question for a year, we love each other a lot ... but our scandals are always on the same level, they don't curse me to go out with him, they even set a date I break up with him..but we are still secretly together .. I keep lying to them and how long will it last like this :(

   God, horror .... I read reviews and my hair stands on end. I am a student of psychology and I am generally aware of the problem of people dependent on their parents, and by "dependent" I do not mean only financially. The problem is in both countries - the parent and the already "grown up" child. But even if there is no such painful and destructive parent-child relationship, parents still continue to forbid and demand from you, this is just their default behavior, it is rare for parents to really understand, support and help their child in the right way. in a way that does not infringe on his dignity and his right to choose. In general, no matter how intelligent people are their parents, a large percentage of those who disbelieve and distrust their "child" tend to, even if he is brilliant in his education, has a job, etc. Understand, that whatever you do, as well as prove to them, you will achieve nothing but the false peace of mind of mom and dad's approval, but you have already grown up and this "peace of mind" will last quite a while. The solution is simply to oppose them, because this is a normal defensive reaction of an adult and a mature person. Do not feel guilty about your parents, always be convinced of your right to be free and independent. The function of the parent is, if possible, to help, if not - not to interfere. Use this against them. The use of domestic violence as a method of persuasion and obedience is absolutely unacceptable. Complain to the police, seek help at an emergency psychological help center, usually involved in various non-governmental organizations, foundations, etc. to put pressure on abusers. In no case do not allow them to convince you of their point of view, understand them, put yourself in their shoes, but stand your ground. That's what I think. As a reassurance, I will say that my relationship with ours is not iron either - I am 22 years old, I do not drink, I do not smoke, I do not go to restaurants, it rarely happens that I go out with my friend and spend the night with them their behavior aimed only at obedience, but this work will not happen.

   Hello. I am a 13 year old girl. I read the article and all the comments. In my opinion, the most important thing in a person's life is his parents. Talk to them and be careful, if it doesn't work, don't lie to them, because then you will get into trouble. You can go to an apartment without your friend and, when your parents come to visit you, arrange and cook. Dress formally. Let the first three evenings with your parents not involve your friend. But then invite him. Let him dress formally. Get ready. Let him speak and say please, sorry and thank you during dinner. When your parents come, it's best to open up and say hello. Hang their jackets on a hanger. The goal is good preparation and good behavior. Dad, you're sure to like the boy especially, if you let them talk a little in private, and the friend will explain to your father how much he loves you and how wonderful you are. Success!

   And I have this problem, in fact I live abroad my mother, my brother, and my sister. My friend is also Bulgarian and we live in the same city. We have been together for 7 months in the beginning, our people didn't know, but he was tired of hiding and decided to tell my brother that we are together, because he knows that I was scared of my brother. So my friend told him, but he did not accept it and immediately excluded my mother, my brother is 24. My mother is strongly against, she does not even allow me to go out with friends. Please tell me what to do, he offered to come with them to us to understand each other, just to be boyfriends. I love him he loves me too. I forgot to say that we are coming at 16.

   Hello. I am 29 years old and I have the same problem. When I was 17, I went with a boy (a year younger than me), my parents wouldn't let me be with him. He was not from a good family, he lied to me, used me, etc. I broke up with him, but after 1 year we met him again and we started going out together. He proposed marriage to me, but when I said at home I was forbidden because he had a child from another. We broke up again. I got a new boyfriend and he wasn't good according to them. I was with him for 5 years until I met my former friend again. I hid from them for a while and then they found out about him. Everything was normal at first glance, but they pretended. He was coming home I was walking in them. I was happy until I told them that I was moving out and going to live with him. And he started using you, he's got another, he's a criminal, he's a drug addict, he lies to you and a bunch of other things. And I love him so much and I don't know if I will be able to fight. I have no strength left. They also want to give me an evening class. They don't want me to come home late. They said they would die for me, I had ruined the family name. And I make my own money, I help at home, I clean, I cook everything I need to do, but they obviously don't want me to start a family so that I can always be with them. I have already come to this conclusion.

   I think you should leave us or if I don't kill them for bearbaria! They deserve punishment!

   I am 22, I am a student and I still depend on my parents. I have a friend for almost 7 years, but they do not approve of him, the bad thing is that we want to live together with him now and we have many common plans for the future. However, my mother and father constantly tease me that he is not for me because he is from the village, he is not very intelligent and I will not achieve anything with him .. I do not know how far everything will go and whether he will not get bored and to end ...

   Hello, I am 45 years old. I have a wonderful family. A daughter who soon married a good boy. We live in a house on different floors. For now, we understand each other very well. I hope it will be the same in the future. I have a brother 11 years older than me. He lives with his family in another house built by my father. God forgive man. My mother lives in the same house, but on my floor. 3 years ago my brother's son got married. And since then it's been 3 years of every visit to my mother I hear about my brother's problems. That their daughter-in-law was bad, that she spent a lot of money, that she went on vacations and similar nonsense that didn't concern me. I'm going to help my mother with something and that's it. In fact, I told them not to get involved in young people's lives. They spend their money and they decide everything. But my mother and brother are constantly digging and teasing their children. And so I had dumped them for a whole month, I hadn't been with my mother. 3, 4 visits to her followed and she again started to set me against my brother and his children. Understand me correctly. Everyone has problems, but I do not burden anyone with mine. When we have problems, we gather, talk and solve them ourselves. And my brother and mother burden me with theirs. And at the last quarrel with my mother again for the same nonsense, she told me that she did not want my brother's children to live with them, a name set against them. I warned her that I would tell everyone how she spoke. Whereupon she slapped me. I went out and really told everyone about the incident. Whereupon I became guilty that they had understood their children, more precisely their daughter-in-law. I want to clarify that these are people who just whine, who do not like to give money, tight, and at the same time create their own problems. I tried not to take an inch of the property from them. Well, I came out guilty of protecting the young. I am very happy to live apart from these people. And, my kids don't go there. I also stopped walking. It can be a sin. I went only because of my mother to help because she is 77 years old, but very angry with everyone. He likes to get confused and in command. I ignored her 20 years ago and did not allow anyone to interfere in my family. Please give your opinion. I ignored her 20 years ago and did not allow anyone to interfere in my family. Please give your opinion. I ignored her 20 years ago and did not allow anyone to interfere in my family. Please give your opinion.

   To number 22. You did the right thing.