I am the mother of a 7-year-old child, with whom I have been living with my parents for 3 years. We have been separated from his father for more than 3 years and he has not been in the country for so long, we do not keep in touch and he is not very interested in the child. I have been dating another man for a year and a half, who soon offered me to live together in his apartment. At first, my son liked him, but lately, he doesn't want us to visit him or sleep there. She treats him very rudely and insults him.
I explained to my child several times that we did not want to replace his father and we loved him very much. He will have his own room with all the things that he has in our country (with my parents).
The situation becomes unbearable when there are three of us, he is constantly angry, does not want to be with us, falls into severe hysteria, and is aggressive.
My friend is very kind, patient, caring, and always there for everything. He tries to play with the child and spend time together, but my son's aggression is so strong that he slowly begins to lose patience. I guess he'll soon be dissuaded from living together, and I understand that sometimes.
Recently I think we should all go to a therapist to give us advice!
Does anyone have experience with this and how did he deal with the problem?
1
style_rouse answered · July 03, 2020
I think your child is jealous
2
hottest_asss answered · July 03, 2020
Take care of your son and don't deal with other men.
3
i_fannyfox answered · July 03, 2020
This problem will not be solved with a therapist. No matter how good the person you want to be with, everyone has a limit of patience. In order to be with you, I guess he didn't know what he was doing and he was already starting to clarify the situation.
Your child will continue to cause problems until he separates you. Many topics have been written about single mothers with children.
Children are a huge problem in second marriages, almost always unsuccessful because of their obsessive behavior.
It is only a matter of time before you separate.
4
lubava50 answered · July 03, 2020
Yes, a therapist is a good idea, even better a child psychologist, because it is really important as a mother to know what is going on in your child's emotional world, no matter what the discomfort they are experiencing.
5
fallenangel010 answered · July 03, 2020
As number 2 said, look after your child alone and do not go to other men. Says a 25-year-old man who has experienced a similar situation, but I was nna 19 (last year in school) even after graduation my parents did not talk and separated 5 months after graduation, I had a hard time but life is such. The conclusion is the following: Whatever hole you dig, you fall into it yourself - in this case it is your new friend whose son you do not like.
6
moesha_rey answered · July 03, 2020
Your child does not think that they are replacing his father, but he is jealous that you have another man. Instead of drooling over him and seeing that by making a scene and rushing to "comfort" him, let him know clearly that it is not he who decides when and with whom you will sleep. If he does not want to sleep there, stay with his grandparents. Children are the biggest manipulators ...
7
soumisnoemie answered · July 04, 2020
Your child grew up with a potty and was watered down. Engage him as much as possible with sports, other activities and sit down to talk to him like a big man. Say clearly and firmly that you want to have a family, that he is loved, respected and no one will tolerate his ligatures. Be firm and let him realize, without running to crush him in every crisis.
I am a child with a deceased mother and my father's second marriage. It's just that my stepmother wasn't nice, on the contrary you live in psychological hell, what things I've been through only I know, I roared every day, I got a fear neurosis and I couldn't sleep at night, I missed basic things, hell. And your child in the center surrounded by everyone and such behavior, no it is not his fault. She is now 7, and when she turns 17 she will make you crazy. My friend, like you, took care of the child, his father left him, she is to blame for having a friend ... care, care today makes her a monkey and she roars from him.
8
mariana_zamora answered · July 04, 2020
Women think of themselves as very mobile and multifunctional, you give birth and change your partner just like that, the next one will come. Yes, sometimes second "marriages" are successful, but this is very rare. In my opinion, children are the most important thing, you should not, for your own happiness and always have a cock, make them suffer. If you don't like the man, separate, stretch with whoever you want, but don't bring a man into your child's life, it's a big trauma for him.
9
veronica_space answered · July 04, 2020
It's all up to the person. I have a second marriage and a daughter from him, as well as a son from the first. My second husband raised my son as his own - today he is already 25 and has taken the path in his life. We see, hear and help each other regularly as much as we can. She adores her sister.
In a second marriage, people are more patient and wise.
I'm scared of some comments. When you're divorced ... to put on the rope ... Horror.
I don't know what to advise the author, I didn't have it. But I spared my son the relationship with my husband, and it wasn't until he got serious before we got married that I told him. He grew up without a father and was de facto happy to have a family and a sister.
It's just up to people.
10
ruthmeller answered · July 05, 2020
For starters, your new friend needs to change his approach. To get closer in a masculine way with things to do together. If one of his childhood dreams comes true, the fry will soften
He is a child after all
I was about 10 when my mother's new husband began to appear in our lives. I felt disgust and dislike but he managed to break us with such ease. It started with delicacies that we had not tried, then saved us from another quarrel over 2ka or plague.
And over time, we accepted it.