Hello! I am an 18 year old girl. I have a friend for a year and a half, my first serious relationship, my first thrill, my first time, etc. everything for the first time with him. We have a relatively happy relationship, we have the same interests, the same goals in life, our understandings are generally the same, and now a BUT I like to spend all my time with him, I gave up my friends, not literally I just don't see them every day we keep in touch everything is ok. But he wants to be with his every day, to know their every move. So far I know that you will say it is normal to go out with them, everyone should have personal space, no one has made you leave your friends. The problem is that I feel neglected because I tell him I don't want to go to them, he conforms to that, he does it every day, he doesn't care about my feelings. No attention, no interest, no tenderness. We had recently met with them at a villa for 2 days, and a few days before I told him that I did not want to be with him anymore if he was not interested in my opinion, my feelings, since he was so dependent on them and could not breathe and a day without them going to them. So I said about the villa, I went there hoping that he would show me in some way, that he loves me, that I really am the most important thing for him, that he will do something to want to be with him, that he will try to get a little numb. of them, no such thing did not sit down to talk to me-not a word said. He was with them all day again, they drank all night, I went to bed without caring, he left me and went to them. He came to me instead of talking to tell me something - he fell asleep. And now a week later all I hear is I want to get together I love you, you're the most important, I don't ignore you, I just need them. I am of the opinion that if you love one person, you are separated, you want to get together when you make a COMPROMISE, you would promise him that you will change something - he did not. It happened from so many stories, almost me or them. He said I can't leave people I grew up with. I can't describe the situation to you exactly and how I feel I can't find the right words. I tell from above, I want advice on what to do how to fight or does it make sense for me to do something at all, because I left it and I think this is the best option. Because if you love someone, you will not ignore him consciously, and the loved one will tell you to stop doing it, and you to continue. What do you like about my question? does it make sense to be with a person who is so attached to some squirrel with a child's mind.
1 DyskretnyiKonkretny answered
From all this I am left with the impression that you are the one with a child's mind, but this is completely normal. To love means to let the other be as he is. And why don't you concentrate on loving him and not having some expectations and when you are not fulfilled to immediately draw conclusions about him that he doesn't love you and so on. What he does is his job. You should be happy even if you spend half of your free time. Because it is your first relationship, you have nothing to compare with and you look too idealistic. Girls are very influenced by romantic movies. They think that everything is very turbulent, good ... In life it is not like that at all. You are very selfish if you want to dump your friends for you. This will not happen. If you want your attention and think that some boy can give it to you at all (all day together is a very bad idea) is looking for another. From my point of view, you owe the boy an apology. Change your requirements. Find other activities when you are not together ... remember that you are individuals and everyone is responsible for their feelings. Just because you feel neglected doesn't mean he makes you feel that way.