October

It all started when I was 16 years old. October. Then I met him (I will not mention his name). I never imagined that I would love him and everything would happen to me. I thought, "Just friends, nothing more." The thing was that he was in another city (I forgot to specify, all this is happening in Germany). We met when he came to the city where I lived to see friends. I didn't have to go out, I knew that, but something inside told me to go out. That's how we met, we met, and it so happened that he had to take a friend, but he didn't know where he lived, because he had come to this city for the 2nd or 3rd time and he knew almost nothing. I knew where this friend of his lived, I offered to go with him, and on the way we started talking about more serious things, from the moment we met I started to like him, and he .. he just fell in love with me, at first sight .. and so the next day on departure I noticed how he looked at me, as if he did not want to leave, I felt it. He only managed to wave his hand at us, we couldn't even hug goodbye, then he got in the car and left. He started looking for me often on Facebook. We became very good friends, we got closer every day, he wrote to me all the time, even though he knew I had a boyfriend. A boyfriend who lied to me, hurt me, and didn't appreciate me at all. And I loved him so much. He caused me so many injuries and infidelities that I decided to end this relationship with him. It was very difficult for me, but I stopped. The moment he realized that I had already broken up with my friend, he confessed to me everything, how much he loved me, that he could not stand it anymore .. And I in anger because I was very angry with my ex I go with him at the moment I say "yes". Then he started coming to my city often, we were constantly together. Day by day I began to fall in love with him more and more. Everything was great until he had to return to Bulgaria to get a driver's license. There he became a monster, the distance ruining our relationship. And there he found a new good friend. After all, I believed in him a lot and I said to myself "He will never hurt me" .. Unfortunately, sometimes those in whom you have the most trust, they hurt the most .. Exactly on my birthday I understand that he is now official with her. And from strangers, he didn't even tell me ... On the same day I also understand that I have "Leukemia", I will never forget this birthday. The most horrible birthday. I was broken into small pieces ... I wanted to die I didn't want to live. I couldn't believe that he turned out to be such a traitor .. Leave me in the most difficult moment for me .. I only remember that he told me "You are the strongest person I know, you will manage without me. I am no longer you I love, I'm sorry, I already love her. "And why ... Because she had comforted him while I was not there .. I couldn't even be angry with him, I didn't want to see him in front of my eyes, I hated him .. I hated life, I hated everything .. Even myself .. I couldn't stand it, I didn't want to fight the disease I had .. And all this just because of him .. And the doctors told me that if I didn't want to save myself, I couldn't survive .. No I cared I wanted to die faster, I wanted to finish all this faster .. Months later I started watching from the real side of life, I realized that with him everything is over and there will be no new beginning, he went on and I will continue .. I fought and finally I was saved .. I am alive to this day. It all went away, I finished high school, then college, university everything went according to plan. I started smiling more often. I forgot about him. I didn't even know where he was and what had happened to him, whether he was still with her or with another ... whether he was alive at all ... But I didn't care. The grades were getting better and better, I was on my way to success. The relationships after him were for 2 days at most. who we are policemen .. To become a man, I realized my father's dream .. But he does not know this, he left me very early .. He left before he saw me with the badges .. I was left with only my mother and sister. My feelings for my fiancé have never been 100% and never will be. Today I decided to write my story here, because I returned to my homeland a few days ago, exactly this month when I met him, a month in which also we broke up with him, and the month I met him again last night at an event. When I saw him I froze I didn't know what to do, he looked at me strangely as if he didn't know me .. I hope he didn't know me, I will die I don't know what to do when I looked at him everything came back again all memories absolutely everything .. Thanks to all who will read it, and I apologize a lot, if I made some spelling mistakes, I will not lie to you over a cup at the moment and roar like a small child because I still want it. And he, he betrayed me. And you know how bad it is for a man to betray you,