I'm 39, my sister is 34. We're both married, with kids. I think that's enough to give you a general idea. I do not intend to go into detailed about the two of us, because it is very likely that someone will recognize us, and I do not want .. And so .. the problem: My son-in-law does not talk to me! Not only that, he doesn't even greet me, he doesn't even look at me. If we meet by chance on the street, he will do everything possible to avoid me, and when we gather at family gatherings, he does not talk to me at all, he does not look at me. Moreover, it happened on a specific holiday such as Easter, for example, to shake hands with everyone and congratulate them, but not with me. Even when they married my sister in the beginning, he was more silent and I attributed it to that. But over time, he relaxed and began to communicate with other family members, until the opposite happened to me, he stepped back even further. I want to clarify that we have never quarreled about anything, I have not said a bad word about him, on the contrary, I have always considered him a very good and decent boy, the right choice for my sister. We have never been in a conflict. For example, last night we were at another family holiday at their place, I decided to break the status quo and was the first to shake hands with him, I had bought presents, etc., but what is happening this morning, we missed centimeters on the street and he turned around again so you don't have to greet me! .. According to another relative, to whom I shared the problem, the reason is my sister, who is jealous and forbade him to talk, etc. with me at all. But this is absurd, because at first she is my sister and even if I wanted to deal with a man other than mine, I would never touch her! Not to mention that he's not even my type and I don't like flirting. And I have never given any reason to be jealous, I have behaved correctly, many people are witnesses. All this hurts me a lot .. Every time I say to myself that I will not care, but how can I be guilty without guilt .. I do not dare to talk directly to my sister, because she will naturally get away, she will not say the exact reason but we will only worsen our relationship. And if the reason is different, she will not believe me, but him ... What do you think .. I will be grateful for any opinions and advice. I dare not speak directly to my sister, because she will naturally get away, she will not say the exact reason, we will only worsen our relationship. And if the reason is different, she will not believe me, but him ... What do you think? .. I will be grateful for any opinions and advice. I dare not speak directly to my sister, because she will naturally get away, she will not say the exact reason, we will only worsen our relationship. And if the reason is different, she will not believe me, but him ... What do you think? .. I will be grateful for any opinions and advice.
Answers 17
He is in love with you and deliberately avoids you, so as not to succumb to emotion and in a moment of weakness to run into you and ruin your family.
With absolute certainty, someone set him against you and he believed him. The other option is that your sister really forbade him to communicate with you out of jealousy. Either way, his behavior is abnormal, and since he won't tell you the truth, don't worry so much at all. Didn't you ask your sister what his behavior was?
If the reason was jealous, he would not communicate with all the other women, and you say that he only avoids you. However, the very fact that you allow jealousy, having in mind that there is no problem with the others in communication, inclines me to think that this is how you will feel. Which in this line of thought leads to the conclusion that consciously or not so much, you gave some signals and he clearly understood the provocation, the invitation or just the desire to like him just like a woman. And he reacted like any normal man without complexes, loving a woman with an ignore. And the fact that you don't even ask your sister in a sisterly way why she ignores you, or at least to share that you feel that way, just means that you don't want to speak out against what she would answer you or not. this direction. I will say again, that he draws these conclusions from your general account of the situation - a man who communicates with everyone quite normally ... only with you. His wife, who has no problem that her husband communicates with everyone, among whom there are certainly other women. And I'm sure your sister noticed she's avoiding you. However, Shton did not talk to you on the subject, even a distant hint of what you think is not on her part, but it means that you are not in the least afraid of her. That is, she trusts her husband. The problem is in you, you know best. Maybe you wanted something else to be confirmed ... but I don't think so. However, Shton did not talk to you on the subject, even a distant hint of what you think is not on her part, but it means that you are not in the least afraid of her. That is, she trusts her husband. The problem is in you, you know best. Maybe you wanted something else to be confirmed ... but I don't think so. However, Shton did not talk to you on the subject, even a distant hint of what you think is not on her part, but it means that you are not in the least afraid of her. That is, she trusts her husband. The problem is in you, you know best. Maybe you wanted something else to be confirmed ... but I don't think so.
This behavior seems very strange and even, I would say, stupid. After all, you are relatives, and very close. Talk to your sister, he's being insulting to you. We can think of various reasons, but I personally would take a stand if there was such a temer.
In my opinion, he wants you so much that he is afraid when he tells you not to talk nonsense. The bald man's complex.
You have been rightly told that your sister may be too jealous and forbid him. The boy may be afraid that your sister will decide that he is flirting with you and the like. I don't know, but it's naughty ...
Hello. Only a conversation will resolve things. Here you can only guess and nothing more. Try at all costs with your sister first. There is no other way, and the last one is with him or your husband to invite him somewhere for a meeting, fishing, match or something like that. And don't forget that things are changeable: don't talk today, but tomorrow ... There is always a way. Dare.
If you haven't fought over anything, only the sex thrill is the reason. Or he likes you more than your sister and therefore limits himself, but internally he wants you a lot. Such are the reactions of men who cannot achieve their goals. If he treats you well, his wife will not. You have come across a difficult copy. And what do you care, how does your son-in-law behave? Pretend you don't notice it and live your life.
And my son-in-law doesn't talk to me, if for some reason we are the only two survivors on earth, he won't talk again. But it is a mansion. That's how he treats my mother. He surprises us with bouquets for our birthdays, but usually my sister gives them to us because he just "went to the kitchen for something" :) I have a feeling that there is something that either you save us or you don't see or pretend not to see. No matter how closed a person is in certain situations, it always breaks. I am very shy and shy, but if I see on the street even a distant relative from my husband's side, I will wave again and at least say hello. You mention that your sister has some suspicions ... You know that without smoke there is no fire. It has to be an absolute hook to decide that something just like that is happening or could happen between you. Take the tape back to your very acquaintance with your son-in-law. How he behaved then, did you talk to each other, how did you behave ... Many people misunderstand the behavior of others - they confuse kindness with a dump, for example. But I still don't care because of a misunderstanding to avoid you like that. Even if you are unpleasant to him, nothing will happen to shake your hand and that's it. There's something else, but if you really don't know what it is, we can't guess.
It's best to talk to your sister. But what are these visits to people you don't talk to? Do not understand it!
Try to talk to him, break the ice! And if not, consult a psychologist!
Thanks to everyone for the answers. Number 11, I did not say that we do not understand that we are quarreling, the occasions are our children's birthdays and Christmas. Number 3, the only other woman present at the gathering is my mother, so I have no idea how things are with other women in general. And believe me, I don't want anything you mention at all, he's not even my type, he's wrong. Number 10, I didn't say my sister had suspicions, maybe she's just very jealous. And I have not given any reasons for such. In fact, most of you are right, you can only guess here, but I wrote the story, because after the last such case I just felt more, I got sick and I wanted to share with someone .. The author
Well, I think he caught them both and talked to them. Because if you only talk to your sister, she may tell him something else / or he may fantasize, and if you talk only to him, your sister may decide that you are a threat, or he may tell her something incorrect. And here are a bunch of problems, go explain that you don't have a brother (because you have a sister :)). Just tell everything you told us to them (if it really is)
Hah, it worries you how if the reason was "other", she would believe him, not you ...? :))) Ah, you're a viper :)
Number 15, I don't understand where your malice comes from? I wanted to say that for whatever reason most people would believe the partner they live with, that's why she is a partner and the third will become an intriguer who creates problems. By "other" reason I meant any, not exactly intimate, as you thought. And I don't see only why you decided that it was my fault, what I provoked him with ... The author
Yes, author, that's what I thought, I don't know why you direct things intimately :))). I do not tell me stories about minors. You have a reason not to want to ask your sister directly. You are afraid of what she would think, whether she will bind you or him ... A person with a clear conscience does not think so. And I have a sister, if something like this ever happens for no reason, but I will openly ask both of them what the problem is. It's dawn on you that your son-in-law ignores you, ask me where. You know your cause very well, that's why you persevere. Now I will answer your UNASKED question directly, just a hint. No, there is no attraction to you, your son-in-law. Otherwise, he would not be able to pretend to be blind on the street as you can see, but he would have used the services of Zalva :). My man will not.
Yes, number 17, I have a reason not to want to ask my sister directly, and she is that I don't want to create unnecessary tension between us and fight. The unanswered question, as you called it, is not whether my son-in-law is attracted to me, because even if he is, my sister may still be jealous. Yes, for no reason, sometimes a man is just jealous when other women are around. And as I already mentioned, if I decide to offer my "services", as you call them to someone, my son-in-law will be the last one, because I care about my sister! Because, even if you don't believe ... And I "won't" ...! And I won't correspond any more with an obvious hater like you anymore, so I say goodbye to this post and stop answering you. The author