I have been living with my friend for a long time, we cover all our bills. The apartment belongs to my parents, who live about half a kilometer from us and come super often without calling us before. I'm glad to see them, of course, but it's a little stressful when we're not expecting them or planning something with my boyfriend. They have other ideas and constantly make us do and carry something without asking us if we have time for it at the moment or if they bring various things that they leave on our ground floor. Ours are super grumpy and abusive and I don't know how to talk to them without creating tension and having an effect? Can you give me advice on what to do or how to explain it to them?
1 morgann_jones answered
Yes, tell them what you tell us. If they are decent and well-meaning, they will understand you and begin to respect you. However, if they start to get angry and sulking, be sure that they are toxic and it will not be easy for you with them. this is a super common manipulation to do what THEY want from you because you owe them - after all, they have taken care of you for so many years. Just think how absurd and brazenly selfish it sounds - someone will offend you because YOU want to have YOUR time and exercise your right to personal choice - what, when and with whom you will do or because you do not want to do what HE wants from you. If this is my second guess, you'd better move out to live in another apartment and impose strict limits on them - for example, if they come uninvited, don't open them. If they continue to behave as if they deserve respect, but you do not have the right to do so on their part - directly break off relations with them. I guarantee you that you will get a divorce or they will cheat on you because of their nonsense.