Hello,
I am a 22-year-old woman, my mother is 40, this year she will be 41.
She's still young to scroll, I think, but she's been disgusting, arrogant, and selfish in the last year or two. Somewhere I think he became like that since my grandfather died (2016), they were very close, he was a unique person, BUT still!
I have been living alone with my boyfriend for a little over a year, she has been remarried for many years and I have a step-sister from my stepfather. First, I want to point out that my stepfather is a very good person, he never shared us with my sister, he always took care of us, he loved us, he accepted me as his daughter and raised me as his child. However, this is not the case with my mother, she has the feeling that she just hates my step-sister. At every convenient moment, he gives her to her father to scold her, to punish her, etc.
In front of me, he calls her with terrible words, insults her that she is stupid, simple, disgusting, stupid, she is useless, and so on. .n., and there is almost no way in which we are alone and she does not start salting it! And he's literally trying to set her against me. I feel really sick because we are sisters, we love each other a lot and respect each other, there have never been quarrels between us (except as children). Relatives in the family have also told me that my mother's attitude towards my sister is not normal and is not at all fair to my stepfather! And he, of course, thinks that she loves her very much and is worried, etc., complete hypocrisy. It's super stupid of me to have such nasty hypocrisy in your own family!
The problems are not just those, of course. My mother has always been a temperamental, hard, and tough woman, I have seen her cry only once at the funeral of her father, my grandfather, as I mentioned above. BUT! In my teenage years, it can be said that we had a slightly warmer relationship and at the same time we always quarreled. From an early age, she insulted me a lot, I still remember some of her words when I was 4-5 class how she fed me every day how fat I am and how I will never lose weight, and yes, that I am stupid, this to this day does not stop repeating it to me.
I've absolutely never heard her say anything like "I'll do it", "You can". She constantly reproaches me that I didn't look like her, that I would never achieve anything if I didn't look like her, that I was the same as my father (I'm on good terms with my father, even though they're divorced, she's jealous) and so on. .n., until tomorrow I can list what she told me. There is no way in which I have expressed my opinion and she does not crush me, whether in private or in front of family and relatives, at every convenient moment just reminds me that I am stupid and that I am stupid. It came to my throat to listen to how stupid I am, honestly: D My father travels a lot and once a month if I can see him, not to see her and she ends "GO TO YOUR FATHER, DID HE WATCH YOU SO MANY YEARS .... ". Your father is always miserable, garbage, deceiver, why have I seen him, why have I talked to him, what kind of person is he, who is he, he just discusses and insults others, but I have no words, she seems to be great!
She's always been like that, but in the last 4-5 years she's been unbearable, she's shaking with some sedatives, I see that she's very stocky (she thinks I'm dumb, but I'm not that stupid). At every opportunity, she teases me when and what she did for me, exactly how much money and when I borrowed it. An example recently, due to the emergency situation in the country I will not work for two weeks and I asked her just for some 30 (!!!) levs to pay a bill and she got it through my nose. She has been teasing me for a week that she paid me a bill, and now I avoid talking to her because, as I said, I get fed up with every second sentence telling me how stupid and stupid I am!
And I'm not exaggerating, she is constantly nervous, constantly screaming and shouting, raising scandals for some trifles that GOD I DON'T KNOW WHERE INVENTED THEM! And her demeanor is noticeable by everyone. If you say "no" or just have a slightly different opinion from its simple ending, it falls into some kind of hysteria. At such moments, I just completely ignore her, and she doesn't know the words "sorry, I'm sorry", I've never heard her say them.
Several times I offered her to go to a psychologist, just to talk, to calm down, I will not just tell you how she reacts, you remember yourself: D What to do with her? !! I love her very much! My mother is, and she is not very old, she works in a very modern profession, she plays sports, she looks modern and stylish and at the same time ... a completely different character. I don't want to erase her from my life, but at the same time, she humiliates me, with constant insults and attacks on literally everything...