Hello! I started to explain my story, but I thought of an article and copied part of it, you better go down and read these questions and how I answered, you will get a good idea. The questions are answered "Yes", only the last two are "No". I have been in a relationship for 3 years, my first love. At first everything was great, at least that's how it seemed to me. He told me how he didn't need others, how he wanted to be with me forever, all sorts of empty promises. He was hellishly obsessive - photos, video calls, explanations. And I thought much more mature then, even though he was bigger. I wanted a healthy and mature relationship. But I was younger and maybe I wanted to like him, a little later I fell in love and changed a lot, I lost myself. I don't have any friends anymore. Now, years later, he has become very frivolous. He says that he is young and wants to live his youth. He has a lot of flirtatious relationships with other women. He moved very far away from me. Even when I tell him something, he either doesn't listen to me at all, or he looks at me and listens with contempt and boredom, he answers in half a word. And then he accuses me of being boring and not talking. He constantly criticizes my character and my appearance. He tells me how other women look or behave well, but he never tells me any good traits of mine. She says I'm not feminine, I haven't washed, cooked, cleaned - we don't even live together.
He has NEVER done a single job in our country, and I have never done so much in their country. Should I go to them to do his job? He is only interested in himself. Literally, if I die, and he can save me by giving 20 leva, he will not do it, because that is to his detriment. Now he tells me that he goes out with his friends, that I go out with mine, but I don't. He says it's not his fault that he deliberately manipulated me in the beginning, and it's my fault that I let him. Credit: e-newspaper. opensubtitles2 en YES:
1. Does he say cruel things to you, followed by the words: "I was just kidding"?
2. Are you mocked when something bad happens to you or you are upset?
3. Does he make sarcastic remarks to you?
4. Does he enjoy telling you things that embarrass or confuse you?
5. Is he joking at your expense?
6. Does he enjoy underestimating or humiliating the people around him?
1. Does he turn things around so that he looks for faults in you?
2. Does he deprive you of caresses or sex if you do not do what he wants, or as a form of punishment?
6. Do you often contradict yourself?
8. Does he behave defiantly, thus making matters worse?
9. Does he manipulate you and other people around him with his plans or great ideas?
1. Did you catch him lying?
2. Do you often distort the truth?
3. Does he have a habit of hiding or distorting important information?
6. Does he come home late and absent without explanation, which could mean that he leads a secret life?
7. Has he cheated on you more than once? / I caught him writing to others, sending photos, he had gone out with one once /
3. Does it happen that he is not next to you or finds an excuse for his absence when you really need him? 4. Do you constantly talk about yourself without paying much attention to your problems? 5. Does he always need to be first? 7. Does he rarely spend money on you, including gifts? 1. Does he often avoid you when he is upset? 2. Is it difficult to get him to speak openly with you? 3. Does he behave reservedly, coolly, arrogantly or indifferently, thus concealing his feelings? 5. Does he avoid giving explanations related to his work? 6. Does he refuse to answer your questions when you try to get any information from him? 1. Does he humiliate his friends and / or family members? 2. Is he constantly criticizing you for your appearance, age, weight or behavior? 3. Does he always reprimand you when you make mistakes? 4. Does he speak disapprovingly of his ex-wife or, in general, of the women in his life? 6. Does he tend to ignore or oppose most of the things you say? 7. Does he enjoy putting people in their place? 1. Are there any unresolved issues between him and his mother or female relatives? 2. Is he cruel or mean? 3. Does it behave like that? as if someone is constantly to blame for something? 4. Does he often talk to you in a hostile, aggressive tone? 5. Does he often talk to you in a way that shows that his behavior irritates him? 6. Does he often treat you arrogantly? 7. Do you often scream and curse? 8. Does he make baseless accusations against you? 9. Does he really want to achieve his goal and is he hostile to you when he fails? 10. Does it explode for no reason? NO: 2. Does it show you that for him you are the most important person, or rather such gestures come late? 4. Can you easily contact him or find out where he is at a given moment? I think he's a psychopath. After 3 years I am still in love. I am emotionally dependent on him, I hope no one happens to be like that. I'm terribly emotionally unstable. I'm worried about being without him, especially for my mental state. Should I start going to a psychologist and then break up with him? Is there a chance that he will grow up, because really 20 to 25 are not the most adequate years? I really don't want to waste this love. I don't know about him, but I love him purely, like a child, and to separate we will always think of him sometimes. Thank you all.
1 kaliii_jones answered
If there's a rotten egg in the fridge and you're hungry, you're going to buy eggs and you're not going to eat the rotten one, are you? Of course, hunger will ask you to eat right now, you probably won't shop. However, after eating a rotten egg, you will feel much worse than if you were hungry for another 15 minutes. This is also in your love affair. Congratulations, you have a broken egg and you are hungry ... If you want to go to a psychologist, but I personally think you only need to use your brain and will. I don't know your man, I don't know how decent he is, I can't judge from your story either, because I tend to believe that there are always two points of view, but one thing is clear as day - you don't respect this man and you have your reasons , for yourself you are right. The last sentence is very important, you are right about yourself. Everyone is right for themselves and is obliged to do what is necessary to improve their situation and not feel like an emotional wreck. Obviously, this man has a bad effect on your psyche. Do you love him Okay, but you love the image you built for him, what he was 3 years ago, not what he is now. At this stage you can struggle for a few more years, like that, to suffer for the sport, to test your endurance, but to put it mildly it is meaningless, because sooner or later you will want a serious relationship, cohabitation, a little madness, a lot of passion, many experiences and finally to start a family. Well, your friend is not a good party for these things and he has proven it to you over time. And why are you with him? True, you love him ... the heart does not ask, I understand you, we have all been in love, we have all loved, but this love of yours is slowly depersonalizing you, cripples and will eventually be a complete wreck. I'm sorry to be so direct, it's certainly not pleasant to read, but you seem like a relatively normal person, and I think I'd better hit you with a wet rag to activate and fix your mess. Find friends, and until then accept that I am your friend at the moment, because everything written, believe me, I write it for your good, I would say the same to my friends.