Me And My Parents

Hello. I am 22 years old and I am very confused. My life needs a change, and I'm stuck in one place. It's about the following - I can't tear myself away from my parents. Even worse - in many ways I have become like them. My mother is conservative, soft-spoken, unable to make decisions (her mom and dad used to do it, and now my father), and when she gets baked for something - she roars - it is easier. Although my father pretends to be a liberal parent, he is strict and stubborn. We never got to the point of sharing. About this - the fault was in me - I did not say anything (according to them). My brother doesn't share with them either, why I used to try to express my opinion, but when he disagreed with my father's - we were supposed to discuss things (he never shouted, he never hit me) but it was still his. So I just stopped arguing. I did this, which he is also angry - I was silent. (so now I have problems with my friend - I do the same as we have a problem - I am silent ...) I seemingly agreed, behind my father's back I did what I wanted. But that's how I started to lie and how to say - when something happens, I don't come face to face with them and tell them so and so, but I lied, I saved their things, I avoided the problem ... So to this day I can't to face them. I haven't lived with them for 4 years now, and I'm in another city - a student, last year. And again - on some level - they are parents - I'm looking for their approval and they only give advice, but this advice is the same - well, this is the solution to this issue that we see ... Last year I was abroad - I went to I am studying a program to overcome my separation with my 2 year old friend and I was reborn. I didn't come for 10 months. I rarely heard from them, I solved my problems on my own - I studied, I started working - I felt that I was breathing, because in Bulgaria I work only in the summer and at other times mine support me. They don't tease me, but I feel sick. And because in Varna, where I study, there are almost no dormitories or they are so funny in number against the background of the admission of students that I will not comment. The apartments are very expensive - mostly with landlords, not to mention landlords. The first year I was with landlords, they threw us out for the summer - to take money from foreigners. Mine then decided that it was madness to change rooms every year to carry luggage and so-from then until now I live with some grandparents-parents of their friends. I'm alone in a room, but you remember - if someone comes to visit me - they always hear who is what. Now the pensions are not in very good condition and people from Varna come 3 times a day to look after them - my friend (I have been with him for a year) sleeping here and then throwing him out as a partisan ... Why do I still live here? Well, I only pay for electricity and water, or rather mine pay and that suits them ... Why didn't I tell this family about my friend? Well, they know that someone is staying - I just do not want to see him, because the first 2 years I went with a boy (my ex) - they knew him (even mine introduced him, but they then imputed a sense of guilt-how so I take him to my quarters. When I came back from studying abroad, I wanted to get out of here, but inflation - everything has risen in price and mine, of course - for what to give extra money for another accommodation? I'm looking for a job, but for now - no one, nothing .. And I can't leave this apartment .. mine still support me - it sucks, I don't have a job at this stage .. For my current friend - they know I have, but only this and now when I come home for Christmas there will be an interrogation .. I don't think .. my friend has rainbow hair - for my mother they are bastards, now he has interrupted for 1 year, not for anything else, but because he works and he is tired of angry with our pornographic education - and mine won't approve of that either ... how can I stop caring about their opinion and ignore them? I know that it's my fault, that I didn't defend mine, that I didn't shout ... now I want to, but I don't seem to know how ... how can I start to oppose them? mine still sustain me - shit, I don't have a job at this stage .. For my current friend-they know I have, but only this and now when I come home for Christmas there will be an interrogation .. I don't think .. my friend has a rainbow hair - for my mother these are bastards, now he has stopped for 1 year, not for anything else, but because he works and he is tired of getting angry with our pornographic education - and mine will not approve of that either .. how can I stop caring about their opinion and ignore them? I know that it's my fault, that I didn't defend mine, that I didn't shout ... now I want to, but I don't seem to know how ... how can I start to oppose them? mine still sustain me - shit, I don't have a job at this stage .. For my current friend-they know I have, but only this and now when I come home for Christmas there will be an interrogation .. I don't think .. my friend has a rainbow hair - for my mother these are bastards, now he has stopped for 1 year, not for anything else, but because he works and he is tired of getting angry with our pornographic education - and mine will not approve of that either .. how can I stop caring about their opinion and ignore them? I know that it's my fault, that I didn't defend mine, that I didn't shout ... now I want to, but I don't seem to know how ... how can I start to oppose them? and because he works and is tired of being angry with our pornographic education - and mine won't approve of that either ... how can I stop caring about their opinion and ignore them? I know that it's my fault, that I didn't defend mine, that I didn't shout ... now I want to, but I don't seem to know how ... how can I start to oppose them? and because he works and is tired of being angry with our pornographic education - and mine won't approve of that either ... how can I stop caring about their opinion and ignore them? I know that it's my fault, that I didn't defend mine, that I didn't shout ... now I want to, but I don't seem to know how ... how can I start to oppose them?