It's Complicated, Something With Love And Lies

Hello, I know that my story will be subject to many criticisms, but I still have to share and ask for some advice. I am a boy of 19, a student in Sofia and I like boys. Once looking at a friend's profile, I liked a colleague very much. He has an amazing smile, perhaps the sweetest in the whole world, even more beautiful than a child's smile. So, I decided to write to him, but in order not to betray myself, I wrote to him first from a fake profile, because I was afraid that my friend would understand, and from there the whole company. I thought I'd tell him as soon as I found out if he was gay like me or not. It turned out to be exactly what I was looking for, but the conversation went so well that I went bald and the fake scratching became more serious than expected. It got to the point that I received his number and only then did I reveal myself to him. I sent him my real profile and so on, but he was angry and angry, and rightly so. He said that he understood me perfectly why I had acted in such a way that he was also hiding from everyone, but, I quote: but that does not change things. Now I'm trying my best to get it back, but it doesn't work. He blocked a fake and removed me from my friends, but he reads my messages. I try to take care of him. To ask him how he is, how he feels. How was his day, to share with him things from my life that I had a hard time and I have not shared with anyone else, even here anonymously, but no. He just reads and that's it. Sometimes he puts on a smile and that's it. Nothing more. I hope someone will help and give me adequate advice, I really hope to get it back, because it turned out, after these 6 hours of chat and phone conversation, that he is not only cute in appearance, but also has a wonderful character. I don't want to lose it at all, even if we remain just friends. Thanks!