It May Seem Easy On The Side, But When It's Your Problem...

I've read your story, and I'd like to share my opinion. I'm a woman, and that's one of the reasons I'm on your side and i understand exactly how you feel. Gather courage and end this relationship, which, as you say, is only out of habit. Just because you've found another person that makes you feel happy doesn't make you a terrible person, quite the opposite. It would be terrible if only for fear of hurting him - a kind of regret. After all, one must first of all look at himself. Believe me, dear live your life the way it is best for you and so that you are happy and feel loved, because that is the most important thing and make sure that if the wheel turns no one will comply with you. If you were in his place, he wouldn't have had such doubts, he'd just say to you one day - I love another, goodbye! So experience this present love and make the most of it. Do you feel like you love a real, love true - not out of habit. That's what I think, and I'd be happy if you could find strength and a way to make things right and enjoy the present. Choosing even from the sides is not easy, so good luck!

Thank you very much for your advice. I wish I was a little stronger or even more selfish...

I know easily there is no but think about whether the other will support you whether he would leave his family for you and live with the thought that his children are far from him and how he would feel in his place I wish you success

Rather, I think that someone "third" should appear in my life. Not that I'm looking for him, but I'm just sure the other one won't leave his family. I can't ask him to. Even if she does- how she will feel afterwards, and will I be able to bear the blame for "her" children, and that our future child will always have to "share " with them - attention, money, everything.... Definitely my mind "speaks" that this is not a solution....

Honey, when I read your story, my heart just shrunk. I saw myself in you. No one can give you an adequate answer to this dilemma... It's insanely hard! I know it from personal experience. And I have a friend with whom I am out of habit, out of respect and for fear of hurting (although at the moment I am hurting him much more without him knowing). We've been with him for almost four years, but the passion, the spark, the sexual attraction is just gone... and for me these are the most important things for a meaningful relationship. And true love, the man I feel a woman with who complements me and who I'm happy with, is married. I totally understand. I know what you feel and what you want from yourself, from your friend, from your love, but it's hard... It's endlessly difficult! People who haven't been in this situation, maybe they'd reproach us, call us with unbeautiful epithoses, they would insult us, but I know what it's like to be at a crossroads where you know the right direction, but you've had to take it. I want to advise you something that I don't have the guts to do. I hope you're stronger than me! It's for your own good to break up with a married man. Just think about how much grief he caused you, how many tears you shed for him when you needed him, and he was with her... Think about whether it's worth the beautiful moments you've lived together, or if they all drown in the bitter tears you cried about him... But if you truly love and want that man who has shown you love, fight for him! But you know, you're not in the first place, it always has an advantage. She's the woman his children are from, and she's always going to be that way. I believe in true love, in love, and if for you this is this married man, love him and give him everything that is in you, give him your love, show him that he is all about you and everything you have (or soon you have...) Do not give up on him with an easy hand. Being married is a terrible obstacle, I know, and I'm sure if you hadn't, you wouldn't be wondering what to do and what to do, and you'd be alone with him (at least in my case). But if he can't take responsibility for you... you just have to move on. Maybe on my own... It's very sad... I don't think I'm going to help you with what I wrote you, and I don't think you're going to listen to advice, but I know that at least one good word will somehow calm your soul! Be strong! From a soul mate...