Hello! First of all, I would like to thank the creators of this platform and all the people who help others here. I am writing here because I am looking for your help and I am really confused. I have an environment around me and good parents, but I have always been lonely. It's just that people don't understand me and I've tried to change that, but I'm too sensitive and I just shut myself in after every failure to reach my loved ones. Basically, I'm a 22-year-old girl and I've had a serious relationship for 4 years. My parents have been living abroad for 11 years, but in the beginning I didn't want to stay with them, and now I want to, but my friend doesn't want to, and we live together and it's hard for me to separate. I tried weed for the first time when I was 12 years old. Then when I was 16 I started using it from time to time. After the age of 18-19, I started smoking weed regularly. I once had a problem with the police, but things calmed down with slight complications, mostly the seriousness of the circumstances. That didn't stop me. I continued to smoke, but I was more careful in hiding.
Today my parents found about 3-4 grams of grass, pipe and lighters in my bag. They were very sad. I was expecting this moment one day, but I didn't think it would be so soon. However, I thought they were going to kill me, but in fact they were just worried and asked me what was going on, if they were wrong about me, if I was sad and I had problems. I said that the grass was not mine, but my friends' and that I was doing them a favor. Did they believe - I don't know ... I hope. But my mother was crying and telling me she didn't want to hurt herself. You see, I don't think grass hurts me. All those people who complain about marijuana - I don't understand them. For me, grass is salvation. The grass helps me to sleep peacefully, to fall asleep easily (I used to have many awake nights). The grass helps me to eat normally and more (the weight is about 45) and for me it is important to gain at least 50 kg. You see, the grass takes me through the problems and helps me relax. I don't want to give it up. I even wanted to explain to my parents, but I guess they would never understand ... Maybe you will condemn me for being a drug addict, etc., but the grass makes me happy and calm. What people have always taken from me. The grass doesn't hurt me, it makes me feel better physically and mentally. It doesn't make me lie down, I'm too lazy to lose the desire to live, on the contrary, it gives me the incentive to want more from life, to find joy ... even in a binge.
I had a lot of difficulties and obstacles, even if it seems strange to you at this age, but from the age of 12 most of the time I was alone and I managed alone and thought of friends as family, and they just betrayed me and hurt me. I love my parents, they do everything for me, but sometimes they use a lot of ugly words that I can't forget even after years. I also love my friend who started beating me in the last year and a half of our relationship, and then he was sorry and I forgave ... I don't know how to explain the loneliness I feel deep inside and I wouldn't even want to believe that other people could make me happy. I would like to rely on myself to be responsible for my happiness, because I know for myself that I will not give up - do you understand me? Even my parents turned against me when I needed a kind word the most. I'm tired of scandals and shouts. I don't want anyone to insult or hit me. Like me, I don't want to hurt anyone. The grass makes me happy and I want to continue using it, because for me it is one of the good things in life. One of the pleasures ... Do you think I'm a drug addict? Do I have mental problems? What's wrong with me? Is it a mistake that I love grass and don't find it bad and dangerous? I will greatly appreciate your attention and words, because if there was someone to talk to, I would not burden you, but alas ...
I do not. am i a drug addict Do I have mental problems? What's wrong with me? Is it a mistake that I love grass and don't find it bad and dangerous? I will greatly appreciate your attention and words, because if there was someone to talk to, I would not burden you, but alas ... I do not. am i a drug addict Do I have mental problems? What's wrong with me? Is it a mistake that I love grass and don't find it bad and dangerous? I will greatly appreciate your attention and words, because if there was someone to talk to, I would not burden you, but alas ... I do not.
1 2koolresurrected answered
It is not normal to smoke weed, much less regularly. This is said by a man who lived in Amsterdam for 4 years and inhaled grass, watched performances ... talked to people who were addicted. Grass is a drug. Also alcohol. The problem is that you don't solve the problems with this weed, you get drunk. Like an alcoholic, you get drunk and live in a parallel world. We had a family friend who smoked 15 cigarettes a day. In fact, he had been getting drunk for years. We had a landlord who smoked non-stop ... Why do you live? And no, you don't have very good parents. Your problems come precisely from their carelessness and striving for the material. Your parents were not with you in your most difficult moments when you were a child and a young girl. Your sleep problems are most likely in early childhood if they didn't put you to sleep, and they just put you to sleep like a baby with a roar. Then in your teens, you were alone too. Are these parents? That's why they reacted that way. They feel guilty. Rightfully. Your friend is right not to want to live with your parents abroad. You are 22. What kind of parents are chasing you anyway. It's time to take care of your own life, earn a living and start a family, not go back to the crib. Accept it's over. You are not a child. Whatever your childhood was over. You can't live with yours. Accept this and you may not need the grass. And more - in our country the grass is banned, unlike in Amsterdam. You risk not only moving into a parallel world, ruining your future (because in those years it's time for you to get an education or learn a profession), but you also risk being condemned one day, which means you can never find a job. Would I hire a grasshopper as an employer (smells right away) - DEFINITELY NOT. I had alcoholics and although they were very competent I fired them. Grass as you know what a weed-smell smells like. Don't think that people don't smell that you smoke. It is evident in the behavior. Once I ate a muffin with this filth and for 2 days I could not coordinate my movements. Complete rubbish. The alcohol is gone for at least 2 hours. Tui holds you for days ... and stinks of shit with an apology. Even for that reason alone, it deserves to be banned. I hope you don't drive because you're a potential killer. Grass may be allowed in the Netherlands, but more tourists actually smoke. However, if they catch you driving drunk, there are draconian punishments. In short, even if the grass was legal, darling, it's not normal, because you can't be a part of life outside - you can't work, drive a car, drive a car, be a mother and look after a baby (you will get drunk and it will suffocate in your own stools and vomit). You smoke, but I hope there is someone to support you for a lifetime to live ... our landlord had property, his money was even going to smoke all day. You don't know how you plan to live. progress, work 16 hours a day, non-stop learning and things like that - that's why people today take stimulant drugs, but not marijuana. to be a mother and to look after a baby (you will get drunk and it will suffocate in its own stools and vomit). You smoke, but I hope there is someone to support you for a lifetime to live ... our landlord had property, his money was even going to smoke all day. You don't know how you plan to live. progress, work 16 hours a day, non-stop learning and things like that - that's why people today take stimulant drugs, but not marijuana. to be a mother and to look after a baby (you will get drunk and it will suffocate in its own stools and vomit). You smoke, but I hope there is someone to support you for a lifetime to live ... our landlord had property, his money was even going to smoke all day. You don't know how you plan to live. progress, work 16 hours a day, non-stop learning and things like that - that's why people today take stimulant drugs, but not marijuana.