As a woman who has been through such a relationship, I advise you not to start! Stay away from the man before you step on the shit. No matter how you turn it, you will end up the suffering party. Even if he divorces, you will be blamed for his failed marriage, and before that you will live in the shadows and alone. You will lose many years in the unhappy life of a mistress even if he divorces. No one can give them back to you these years, and then you will go through Hell during the divorce and after. If there are small children, the drama will be complete.
Don't start at all!
And yet - this man is quite afraid of the Faithful once he has taken such measures. He ultimately guards his marriage. Since she really had no relationship with you, I guess he had other lovers that she found out about and, hoping to appease her husband, made him rub profiles and nonsense. Let them play in marriage and don't slap each other. The worst thing about the role of the third corner in the triangle is that nothing depends on you. You will stand, you will wait like a cuckoo, while the people around you have normal relationships with normal men, make families, go on vacations, dinners and celebrate holidays together ... You will graduate, you will make a career, but you will always be alone, And let's not forget that the married man has someone by his side - he will go to sea with children and a woman, he will celebrate the holidays with her and everything will be fine for her, while you will satisfy his need for love and sex. and you will stand alone, and the worst thing is that you will not see a future with him. Falling in love itself will not disappear with age, because you will rarely see each other. In a nutshell, you will have a weight on your legs, the weight of a bound woman, but you will have nothing in return but a few stolen moments together.
You risk everything - not only your mental health but also the loss of social status and name. Your parents, your friends, even your teachers, and employers will feel ashamed of you.
Listen number 1, she's right about everything! It's better to get mad now than to bang your head against the wall and wonder where your mind was! Success!
Number 1 told you very accurately. And I had a relationship with a married man 27 years older than me. Let a man ask me what he was for me. We had sex for a while and I gave up. What was this uncle about, I wondered one day and dumped him before he realized what was happening. Don't get caught. lest his wife takes you away.
Don't bother! You will find the right person for you.
And I, as someone who has been through this, can tell you that it is not worth it.
He is already divorced, single, and constantly looking for me because he has realized what he has lost, but I no longer want him.
I used to have a strong love for him and I was able to enjoy what I got from this relationship. Not from him, but as a lesson in life.
And so three years after our last meeting, I can say with all my heart that I love him as someone I knew, as a memory of something I experienced, but I really realize that I can't even sympathize with him. And to feel sorry for him - not worth it.
Sometimes I accidentally understand some things about him and listen to them with the inner conviction that I am living my life now.
I'll be honest - there are good sides, but such a relationship is associated with a lot of drama and you will understand it when you first fall to the floor after another departure and roar like an idiot. I don't wish that on anyone - only those who have slipped like that know how much pain, humiliation, the thought of being pathetic in your own eyes has been. And on top of that, in a week, when he finds time for you again, there is no mention of the idiot roaring on the floor, because as a mistress, you have to be eternally friendly, smiling, giving ... otherwise he will dump you. He is not looking for dramas - he has some of them - at home, the children, the work.
You are a medicine. The convenient escape of a coward who lives in a lie. No, he doesn't lie to you - there's no need, he tells you at a wonderful moment that he won't ruin his family. And you have to accept this news, because you know where you are.
You work, you improve, you try to develop so that you don't think. On the one hand, this is positive, but when something good happens and you want to call him and brag to him - you look at the clock. The fifth time you reach for the phone, looking at the clock first, you realize that you are working hours.
Not after 17. And you hate yourself for that, but you've already stepped on both ends and just go with the flow, resigned to some rules that your soul denies.
The mistress does NOT call or search. She is NOT sick, she is always sexed, she is always talked to. She has no right to grumble, run or get tired. She always gives without receiving anything but sex and it's fast.
Don't start or if you can use it at once to smell. However, forbid yourself to fall in love, because it will hurt you ...
and five years later, or ten, you'll realize that this pain just wasn't worth it.
I just want to ask you the question - if one day your husband decides to cheat on you about 20 years younger than you, how would you feel?
n 6, again dramas, again desperate wives. The topic here is not about how many younger women your husband is cheating on you with. If you are so afraid of young women - marry a man 20 years older than you and you're done - there's no way to go with a woman 20 years younger than you without the risk of becoming a pedophile or laughing (no you know the years).
Tighten up and if you have nothing to say on the subject, SHUT UP
I hope there are more modern girls like you!
Married man, 38
I am the author and I want to thank everyone who commented! I'm already drowning. My stomach turns when I see it, and when there is no time for me, it twists and when I cry, it hurts so much that it's as if someone is cutting my heart with a knife. I wish I was one of those girls who is interested in money and cars and moves on to the next one without any feelings. I wish I was one of those soulless dolls who can't love. His children are big. Even one girl is my age and we find common ground. She is a very well-mannered and good girl and our acquaintance would have been wonderful if I had not carried in my heart the secret that I am in love with her father ... Especially at number 6 I want to answer that I will not be very happy if my husband dumped me for 20 years younger, but no one is insured. And from my current position, I'm not in a rosy position either.
Author, enough drama. Now your heart was broken - well, imagine actually becoming his mistress! So he hasn't divorced in so many years, you won't be his first or his last. Especially men over 50 are married, ie. they also have to share property with their wife. For you, he will part with half his house and property, his car, and so on? What he has built in half his life will give him to be with you? Separately, even older children create problems. You have no future, but the worst thing about a mistress is that you don't have a present. You will see each other for 1 hour of sex a week and he will even start writing to you and calling you less often to keep his marriage
I've been through this (I'm 1) and I guarantee you it's HELL.
Bray, there is progress, the women have suddenly become wiser. Dig through old similar topics, see what advice they gave each other. Back then, infidelity was considered normal, your life was personal and had to be lived as they saw fit, now they just surprise me. I expected advice to follow, if your soul wants it, take advantage, but this time always wise advice. Probably because the man is married and the woman is single. If it were the other way around, the old advice would be poured in, the justifications would start. Women are great hypocrites when it is to their advantage and the devil becomes a saint, but if it is to their detriment, the saint is not loved.
Number 7, I'm number 6 - I'm not afraid of young women "darling". I'm 19 myself, believe it or not. But I put myself in the woman's shoes. The question is whether there are few free men left that so many women like to put pressure on married men. But author, I don't blame you for that at all, don't get me wrong. It is not you who is to blame, but he (the man capable of cheating, whether he is a man or a woman). Having so many problems with your wife, just break up with her, and then be together.
You will grow old from dramas.
One day you will look at yourself and cry for yourself, not for the one you are dying for now.
In my opinion, women who fall in love with married men have several problems. 1- They like this man because he has already started a family and in their eyes he seems safe and responsible, that is, if he divorces and is with them and they will get family comfort and children, while someone free does not know if he can support a family at all. 2- The thrill of abandoning children and family to be with you. You kind of lift yourself up in your own eyes, when a woman she's been with for so long and has children from her dumps her for me, then I'm something great. 3-The thrill of doing something wrong, the more wrong the greater the thrill, and that is why these women so sink with the butterflies in their stomachs. If you take the same man but an old bachelor, he would hardly provoke these thrills, he would rather provoke criticism. And men just relax with their mistress, use her for fun from family responsibilities, but she thinks he's crazy about her. No one judges, because I know that everything comes back and everyone is responsible for the consequences. But personally I can't explain myself with anything else, to be young and to have the opportunity to be with free men who will pay attention only to you, you will go out and there will be no need to hide, you will prefer married. And I have been offered several marriages, one quite wealthy, but personally I do not have these needs and I would not get into such dramas.
I understand you very well. I myself am madly in love with a man with whom I have a 26-year difference in his favor. This class, this style, the charisma, the intellect that he has ... well, young men just miss him! At first I thought he was married because I knew his wife and she introduced herself by his last name. How relieved I was to have been divorced for years! They are really divorced, not "separated" and I didn't understand that from him. Anyway. I can't be with him because I'm married and because we're in a business relationship. I just know how unbearably attractive such a man can be. Besides, there is something else - this feeling gives you drama, thrill, beauty ... This is not the weekday love of others who meet in cafes, university banks, dormitories and then go out in the same cafes and send slimy emoticons on Facebook. Now you are a tragic person, you have a complicated love, you are sacrificial, your feeling is "more beautiful". Here, too, I understand you, because the longing for the "unattainable" is embedded in me as well. I have decided for myself that if I have the opportunity to have sex with this man once, without anyone knowing, I will do it and "close" the case. I'm not saying that I will be able to forget it so easily, but there can be no question of a connection between us. I don't know if I should give you the same advice. I'm not sure you'll have the strength to give up once you start. There is love that is best to stay in the heart, not to be realized. I guess you'll get upset. I guess I'm not sure that the more we give you advice not to look for him, not to start, to stop in time, the more you want to be with him in spite of everything. However, I hope for your good to believe the lovers who wrote to you above and not to cause yourself the suffering they have experienced, because if this man has not divorced so far, then he will not do it and yet. I wish you strength - you will need it.
№5, admiration for the comment - intelligent, realistic to the point of pain and most importantly to a woman who has learned a lesson. Well done!
n5, quite a pity, my friend divorced in 3 months. my advice is to find out first if he intends to divorce, it is possible that his relationship is really exhausted. a n 16 is a desperate wife or one who is afraid of being cheated on. and n 14, I didn't feel good that he was divorced, they actually divorced because their relationship was exhausted. sorry for those who called to be on call, but this is not the normal order.
H 17, wasn't it the former :))). You are the one who pours out your demons everywhere, aren't you? Sympathy, in order to give up so quickly and apply Houdini's number, (magic escape) means only that it is not worth staying around you longer.
Hahah, I know, now you will order me to be a "desperate wife" :)))
18, take your pills, why aren't you? Maybe you haven't seen a psychiatrist recently? you are what is mentally wrong! you are very confused ....
Author, listen to number 1, and stop! A friend is in the same situation and for 4 years she has been deluding herself that she will divorce him. I see her going crazy literally and honestly, I feel sorry for her. These are such exhausting emotions and I don't know why people cause it themselves.
Have sex with him and everything will be fine
18 something is wrong ... I think it's not worth staying around her .... poor thing .... 21 is a man, most likely cheating ..
It is possible that 21 is a man and it is very likely that they are cheating on him.
For me, these are petty things ... Only a woman who has no self-esteem and dignity can get involved in such a thing. Number 1 and number 14 have grasped the idea perfectly. Stop rummaging and digging in the marriages of married men, respectively in those of engaged people! Learn that a relationship consists of two, there is no room for a third intruder! If his husband is so smart as to look for entertainment outside the home, his problem is his own! do not become his bait with which to drool. "But he has class, but he is a gentleman, but I don't know what" ... gentlemen and men are not over, stop the interventions! People like you need someone who will only cheat on you in order for you to come to your senses ... They have morally degraded the genre.
Gabby, have you ever fallen in love? Are you married? Are you a virgin?
"Intervention" is a symptom of 1 exhausted relationship .... Gabi seems to be a "paw", or a woman who is cheated on.
24, are they cheating on you?
28 - I'm not a virgin, I've fallen in love, about marriage - there's still some time;) I don't have to go through this to have the right to speak. At least because I would never let him. Why should one always justify oneself with mantras such as "the heart does not listen to rules and norms", "love is blind", etc ... If a person has a mind, he will listen to his mind - especially knowing that the other person is not free bird.What if you have sunk? You are not an animal with primitive behavior, you can control your actions.Knowing that it is not right, back off! Are you really going to have a safe relationship with single people? Do you really want to ruin families over time because of your "blind love"? Or do you say "hey it wasn't intentional" and blah blah. What if one day someone comes to you ruin the family / relationship in the same way ???? A person may not have full control over his emotions, but he definitely has control over his actions. ACTIONS are what define a person. And if one day I find out that someone wants to break my relationship (knowing that my friend is with m en), I will ruin her and blacken her life. This alone remains, as long as Bulgaria is a failed government and always at the top of negative economic rankings, but also some bad guys to contribute to the "ideal" class of which we are composed.
in my opinion, people who can't create their own stable relationship or family and are looking for married lovers are deeply complex individuals, most likely ugly and nothing who knows what in real life. They attach importance and self-confidence when someone married with children fucks them. It's the same with men. To me, these are confused people. Spit as much as you want, but even the statistics support my opinion. Personally, I would never deal with a married woman, separate their family and children to use me as a vibrator. No thanks.
I do not understand who is involved in what. Married, unmarried, there are no such definitions anymore ... because just as you got married today, you can get divorced tomorrow ... but this is the truth, people are already doing what they want!
32 is still in childhood .. there are people with their own "stable relationship" who cheat. I think you're complex and ugly, and nothing.
relax, drink one and fuck wildly. I believe in good! I believe that everyone can change for the better! Do it! Please. No man deserves what you would do to him with this vision of life ...
35, don't waste your time. Because of this, YOUR view of life, we are in this situation and I am disgusted. I do not write about a saint, but I definitely have the necessary morals to be above things and nonsense. That is why you cannot give an adequate explanation for your actions. You are just attacking, or scattering nonsense on the topic, as you did in your post. Not that explanations are needed, I can imagine what the "sinners" will say in their defense.
1 69funwithfriends69 answered