Hello, I don't know where to start, I am a 40-year-old woman, I have a husband and two children, one of whom is already 19 years old. My husband and I haven't gotten along very much lately, we fight and annoy each other. I don't know if it happened or just happened, but I've been meeting with a colleague for about a month. We started hanging out and exchanging glances and writing to each other in the evening after my husband fell asleep. First he wrote to me and then I got angry at first, but lately I still seem to write, but I can't help but see him online. I like him. I see the posts but he doesn't write and I write I As I write I smile all the time I catch myself and I think about him all the time I can't get him out of my head and he seems indifferent once he told me he likes me but we can't have anything more from sex I told him that I didn't want to ruin my family either, but still, when I saw him, my heart contracted and they got up too. I think of him and smile he behaves very contradictory one time is very kind the other time indifferent. He told me to write to him because it's easy, when I can because he doesn't know who is with me, we hide at work and we meet to chat, but he is still in a hurry and lately he doesn't want to meet. He says when the time comes he will have everything. I tell him when to see him he is waiting and you understand me whatever decision I make would respect him. it hurts me he doesn't care. I still want to feel that he's a little more interested in me than to risk my family and be with him. We haven't had sex yet, we are a small town and he lives alone but in a central place and they will see us and it's a bit complicated and I'm not deciding yet, I'm crazy about him but he doesn't seem to know what to do, whether if we have sex it will completely cool down to me and end or he will want to see me again I want it not just for once. I made him a small gift, a cross and a chain, he got worried and thanked me, he liked it, but he didn't wear it, he took a picture with it and sent me a photo and thanked me, but he brought the old one, I don't know what to think. He is my set but he is alone and has no children at work, he goes around the beautiful girls and they talk and laugh and I am jealous of him I follow him constantly with a look that drives me crazy. I touch him ostensibly at work when I can, but he's only done that once. One time when I gave him a present and kissed him on the cheek and he kissed me and he kissed me on the cheek, then I wrote to him that nothing was happening to us and that we had to kiss like people and he said that this was not the place and that when the time came we would kiss freely. Give me advice, I have no one to share it with, and for that here please write me opinions and advice, thank you for reading this long story. Now we are on vacation and I'm wondering if I should write to him or wait to see if he will do it and make him feel homesick for me on the other hand, I can't help it and I should write when I can ... Please help
Answers 37
Honestly, I don't even know exactly what you're asking. It is clear that you have sunk and it is clear that you are the more interested party. Even if you have sex, soon after that he will fight back and leave you ... obviously he doesn't lack female attention and he didn't lean only on you. You decide if you want to cause it. You haven't received attention from anyone but your husband in a long time, and now you're happy with what's happening. However, with the feelings you have developed, things can only end tragically for you.
Women are unique! Instead of liking your husbands with whom you have raised children - something very difficult, you go to another. Author, think about why this man is alone and without children at the age of 40? Otherwise, this man wants sex, but he is afraid of your husband, but he also wants something younger!
Ohhh, unexperienced youth and more precisely teenage years. I advise you to find a way not to think about it, it sounds impossible, but train your psyche and it will happen. Sounds like a naive girl to me, I know you're a woman of 40! Don't sleep with him! He only wants you for sex and loves his freedom. Believe me, you are close to him and if he really liked you for something more, his attitude would be different. The other thing I want to tell you is that he doesn't want to complicate his life and take responsibility, you are still married. He told you he wanted sex!
Classics in the Bulgarian family.
Well, the man was honest and told you - nothing more than sex. Yes, but sex is still a mirage, and you invest feelings. He will fuck you 2-3 times and throw you away and chase the young girls with new strength. And what broke me the most was that you also give him presents - like those aunts who pay for gigolo sex, what was his name - I hope my readers don't laugh that I'm not aware of the terminology. But since you yourself write that he is most often indifferent, he does not write you, the only thing I can advise you is to stop in time - do not expose yourself.
Thank you for the advice, but tell me how to get it out of my head and how to stop thinking about it ...
And when he writes to me, what should I do to answer him, how will I be able to refrain and what can I tell him, and after the vacation at work and when I see him I don't know how to behave and how I will resist him ....
Well, don't answer him! Just communicate only in business, watch your work - a hundred peaceful. Stop with these soaps, get it out of your head, because you're going to break up your family. If things get rough, let me see how you can convince your husband that it was just sex! I am very angry at such people. Both a man and a lover suffer, and there are so many single women ...
He is a big woman, and with his mind worse than a 16-year-old teenager. Why don't you tell your husband about your problem so he can see what he thinks about it?
You're only ready to ruin your family for one fuck, with a 40-year-old bachelor who hasn't made a stable relationship so far. Sit down and talk to your husband, with whom you don't seem to get along. Then do not roar, in another section of the forum. In the small town everything is heard and seen. Now you're used to being ready, and then seeing how you manage on your own. Fucking men pain. But responsible, honest, you will hardly find at 40 years old.
Typical player - holds you like a fish on a fishing rod. Waiting for you to pray for sex and say for yourself that you don't want a commitment. Think about how playful you will be, how it will make you a fool, how disappointed your children will be if they find out about your possible outing. Think he can spin others in parallel with you. Think about the fact that tomorrow you may be divorced and abandoned, with a ruined reputation and broken self-esteem. Alpha, w. 29 years old
To all the above: She won't answer him, well ... But it's very likely that he will get even more chased after her, that she runs away from him can stimulate him to want her more, even for sex alone. Just look, change the strategy ... To reverse the roles and let it catch on. It is clear that he only wants sex, even if he was still married, just then they will be in the same position. And married does not prevent him from having a mistress and taking her off, but now he does it openly, with others, because he lives alone. But I think that the author will not get rid of it so easily, ie not him, but the idea of what she will deliberately lose, the thrill. That feeling she may no longer feel with her husband. To the author: Think carefully before you risk getting into a big mess, whether it's worth it at all and whether if you do, your conscience won't bother you, because you seem right to me, you just lack a thrill in my opinion. You hardly fell for it, just for you it is an opportunity for pleasant moments, in my opinion. Think if it's worth even more that he doesn't have a wife and doesn't risk anything, and you a lot! Success!
Author: it's me again. Now, reading your writings again, I feel that you are bent on sleeping with him. If so, at least don't give it so "cheaply". Give him the opportunity to "work" to have you, and how it will be in your situation, let him think. This way you will not only look up in his eyes, because now believe me very low there, but it is also possible that sex is not just for once. BUT even if you look up in his eyes, which I doubt a little now, because you're not the only one he probably pays attention to and will one have the time to do it, keep in mind that you have to hide all the time if you don't want the man you understand. And ask yourself if you know him well enough to trust him in every sense of the word. It takes time. Why doesn't he write to you as often as before? Think ... Well, because he knows, that you are already wrapped up in it and there is nothing to push for anymore. He knows that you will give it to him easily and he will not do anything for you anymore, in my opinion. Is that what you want? I don't think so. You will hardly get an attitude from him after sex. Think!
I know I sound like a naive teenager, but love makes people blind, and when she comes she doesn't ask. I try to fight with myself and my feelings, but it's really hard for me. You help me a lot, for which I thank you.
Comment number 15 understood me best and felt exactly what I feel. Since we have been on vacation for a whole week I have not written to him, and he wrote to me twice, but I do not think that his attitude has changed anything .I'm constantly waiting for him to write to me and I go crazy, but for now I refrain from doing it at least. I see that he looks at the photos I upload, but nothing ... There is another detail that I had not shared with you bigger than me and I feel safe with him, but the difference has not bothered me until now, but lately I feel it more and more ... He is 52 years old after all.
It is not love. Strong physical attraction, not love. If you have decided to embark, at least don't really go cheap, as number 16 says. And it's best to save it.
What can I do to make it not cheap, how to make him change his attitude as it was in the beginning, how to turn things around so that he is not indifferent. Probably maybe somehow, I've been on vacation with my family for 5 days now, he doesn't just write the photos he looks at me, the last night before we left he told me to write to him when I could, but for now I refrain even though I was on the edge today. I want him to start missing me, but that's hardly possible, and I miss him terribly ...
I exposed myself again yesterday morning, I wrote to him, and I didn't have to know ..... We wrote to each other and I was fine, but then I got angry with myself that I couldn't resist ....
I'm number 15 and 16 .... So ... What would I do in your place - I will not write first and I will not follow what he does on social networks, whether he publishes, whether he looks at my photos, whatever. ..! And I will not return the messages. I will totally ignore him. Whatever it costs me, I'll try. If he wants to tell me something ... to find a way to do it face to face. Then I will keep cool and show him that things are not around him, that I am busy and that I have work to do, but I will still listen to him. I will dress well, put on make-up and flirt with him, as if handing him ice cream and pulling him closer and leaving. Just don't look desperately obsessed with it, Remember: It is not a means to your happiness! The result will be or will start courting you as before, but it will take some time ... This is the only way I think to look him in the eye, because it will look like you were wrong about him and his ego will fall, and now it's like you have a flaw in your character and you don't understand that he's playing with you, that's what it looks like ... And the other, what can happen is he will give up. It's so easy to tell if he really liked you and if he was really going to do the things he said. In short, when he sees that you are not tied to his handkerchief, he will either fight for you or stop. But keep in mind that he can court you just because he wants sex, he may even want it for once. If you accept the thought of sleeping with him only once and that he may not pay attention to you at all after that, then you are ok, but if not, do not sleep with him at all, you will be much more disappointed later than you are now. About your difference: She's perfect. If I were you, I'd look at my husband with different eyes. It's all a matter of habit, and your habit lately is to think about the other. Stop punishing yourself and try to get it out of your head, the other one. Calm down and let it develop, if something doesn't go the way you want it to, then it's not your thing. Or at least it's not with him ... with that ... the other ...
I'm number 15 and 16 again ... I forgot to tell you: Just make sure you don't stay on the two chairs on the ground! Take care of yourself if you decide to do something with it. If you have the slightest doubt, don't ....
Whether I sleep with him or not, the result will probably be the same, I will still suffer after that, because after that he will hardly pay attention to me, and I definitely don't want it to be for once, but I definitely don't want to spoil it. number. You help me a lot with your advice, for which I thank you very much, I will try the way he told me if I manage to endure from that time I did not write to him, but he wrote to me once, but I answered him unfortunately ... it will be the next week when we start work and I started to see him, I will go crazy ... If he gives up, however, what I think is quite probable, I will also experience it very hard ... It would be best to kill him once in a while forever, but this is what the mind says, and the heart says something else ...
Find another object that is not from your work, so you will forget it
I'm probably getting banal and you're tired of me, but I can't guess why I'm so stupid and I see that he's not so interested and I keep exposing myself, I don't know why I'm so stupid. He drives me crazy and insists on seeing me alone, but otherwise he is reserved, he writes to me and then he talks to me half-heartedly or he doesn't write to me, I don't know, and I had to not answer him, but I didn't refrain. We are at work from tomorrow and I will see how he behaves live.
he doesn't want to give you hope, he just wants sex. You don't seem to be trying to replace him with anything else, you're very depressed, like a teenager, and he's spinning you on his finger. Think about how much you will hurt your children if they find out
Since we came back from vacation, things have changed a lot, I kept cool, but he was very nice and every day is very nice, he even gave me a small gift yesterday, he constantly writes to me and at work he follows me with his eyes I feel it, as soon as I looked and I met his gaze, and he smiled at me or something ... We have a secret place at work and today we met there for the first time we really kissed and he started. I think about this kiss all day and I can't stop smiling. The day before I was sad or angry rather from work and he immediately noticed me and started to calm me down, to ask me why I was sad, etc. I don't know if it is right, but if I don't I won't smell it. Next week I'll be alone for two days and I think I'll see you then only once and end forever, I don't know how I'm going to fight my conscience, but I will have to deal with her and my feelings, but ... I think I have made up my mind and I think this may refresh the relationship with my husband. I hope I'm not mistaken .... I still have 1 week to think ...
It will probably not be just once, you will start a relationship
My time is running out, there is almost no time left, but I am sinking more and more and I will obviously do it, but I am afraid that my husband will not understand. On the other hand, things are great at work with the other, we go earlier every morning and he and I meet at our secret place and kiss. As students, but it's so exciting and during the day we pretend to be distracted in front of others but we constantly look at each other and smile, every night we write to each other and during the lunch break despite everything I still wonder if I should do it ....
Hello, it's me again, today is the day we will meet and we will have all night, but fate is joking with me obviously, because it came to me yesterday and obviously we will not be able to have sex. However, he said that he still wanted to see each other, that we would not have sex, spend the night together, hug and kiss. I agreed if it's right I don't know, but ... I think why he wants to see me even though there will be no sex. What do you think?
Stop writing nonsense. You can do blowjobs, you have all night. Most of the comments are yours. Your husband obviously isn't ... well, that's why you only think about infidelity.
Oh, author, take a knock and let it pass that I'm tired of reading: oh, should I write to him, but when he looks at me, how many seconds should I look at him and smile, but if I let him, how many times will we do it before he dumps me .... When you're in a cycle, take a man's whistle or give it to the back and it's over!
We think you're crazy. Are you expecting an engagement ring? !!
I apologize to everyone if I bothered you with my problems, but that's why this site is to share our feelings. I have no one else to share with ..
<35> - can you imagine the babe (40 years old) sitting in a hotel room or at a company party / for example / with a tablet or phone and waiting for the comments to be approved to decide whether to let him go or not;)
Once again, I ask the moderators of spodeli.net not to publish hate and comments that not only do not aim to help but also contain offensive remarks! Comment 37 is inadmissible
From the author I will be rougher this time too, although it is not typical for me. We've fucked twice already, we've spent two nights together and we've done it many times, but we don't want more and more ... I'm afraid my husband won't understand and I want everything to end, but I can't wish for it, and I am obviously starting to invest feelings ...
To the author Why are you bothering us with your whore stories? You are a pity to your family. All this damage will fall on your child. It's only a matter of time. Just wait and see
I won't say what I think of you, author, but I pray that someone like me is never too high, haha.