Don't blame yourself and I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks. Just the fetus has not developed, the next time will be fine. It's not your fault. You have to be calm, unfortunately it happens to many women, your mother-in-law is not confused, what if she had two children, to look after her affairs.
Look ahead, do something new with your husband, go somewhere to cheer up, don't despair.
FIRST, you are NOT to blame, but there is a possibility that the toxic people around you burden you mentally and this has a very bad effect on you and the fetus. Move away from them and cut if necessary roughly and to the bone. You and your peace of mind are most important.
Second, I had two miscarriages due to my Rh factor, which was negative, and my father was positive, and they were not my vaccine. After all, I gave birth to two completely healthy boys and without the vaccine, I enter those 6% lucky mothers who gave birth to completely healthy children in such a situation, but earned another instinct in me and drank chicken blood (for info search in English or Spanish, I found years more later why then my instinct directed me to do so).
Third, there is a possibility that there was a serious genetic disease in your or your husband's lineage and the fetus could not develop. In that case, the better outcome is whatever happened.
I recommend that you do DNA tests together for possible hereditary diseases.
And most importantly (!!!) complete peace of mind for you, positive feelings, fun, no obsession with the thought of pregnancy, etc.
Enjoy life and have sex with love, not for a baby. It will only come in such a positive environment.
Get rid of the mother-in-law, she's poisonous! If you have to say that not all women need to be looking for a man of childbearing age at such an age to tie him better ... fight where he will force her to perform back in the hole, but away from you.
Do not seek support from anyone but yourself and your husband!
However, if your husband himself does not close his mother's mouth properly ... bad ... I don't know if you should give birth to one! He must be the first to support you, and he may also be "bad genetic material" that only the analysis of the two of you will show!
Good luck and don't drown in guilt, you're not guilty, you're just depressed, scared and so hyenas take advantage to attack you instead of helping you stand up!
Hello, I'm sorry for your loss. I understand you and I sympathize with you. Do not lose hope for a healthy child.
My grandmother was a midwife and as far as I can refer to her experience of miscarriage, the reasons are biological. The baby is rejected by the body due to severe physiological damage incompatible with life. Nature has ordained it. It's not your fault. There was nothing that you could do.
Many women experience this, you are not alone. Many women become pregnant after an abortion and give birth to completely healthy babies.
Have faith and try again when you are ready.
I send you a lot of positive emotions and I wish you from the bottom of my heart a child in the future who will fill your soul with the happiness you deserve!
There are many reasons. Try to prepare not to repeat. Some, for example, get an injection every day for 8-9 months, not all go easily.
Calm down.
I lost a child in the 8th month of pregnancy, I did not receive sympathy from anyone and I did not seek it.
At 34 and 36 I gave birth to my children, without a single stitch, quite naturally.
What is your job, if you work on a chair, go to sports, to walk, to strengthen the muscles of the buttocks, to keep the uterus strong.
There are thousands of reasons for fetal loss.
This is not a child yet, it is a fetus.
And what watches, what years.
Around me from the family I gave birth at the age of 38, at the age of 41, imagine too.
You will have, calm down.
And tell your husband that bragging is not done with such things. By the third month, it is so common for babies to "fall" that I do not know what you are crying about at the moment.
I'm rude to make you conscious.
You do not need regret, but to look ahead, you have a husband next to you, what more.
Come on, and good luck!
And I repeat, you have not lost any child, a fruit has fallen, which often happens.
Don't film and don't feel sorry for yourself.
Try to be physically healthy.
The rest from the Lord.
You have experienced horror ... losing your baby is one of the greatest misfortunes that can happen to a mother. I have an acquaintance who gave birth to healthy twins at 36. I can't understand how they can rebuke you at such a moment ... It is normal in such circumstances to start doubting everything, including yourself. In my opinion, try again after a while for a new baby, continue to abstain from alcohol, cigarettes and harmful foods until then. To be sure, do tests to find out what caused the abortion ... it could be an organism or just an accident ... And sometimes it could be from the man, because after all the child is created by a man and a woman. For example, if he himself has any bad habits or diseases, the sperm are damaged. In my opinion, even do your research for safety. Be strong!!
Hello dear! A 32-year-old woman writes to you. I, like you, was not lucky enough to meet love at a younger age. I met my husband at 30. In 6 months our relationship developed. In love and winged, exactly on the 6th month of our acquaintance I became pregnant. Hey, what a joy. Unfortunately, I lost the baby a little earlier than you. Then depression, crying and alcohol. I almost pushed away my wonderful boy, who was inseparable from me. One day I got out of bed and said to myself, it's over. No more nonsense. I began to think positively. It wasn't long before I got pregnant. Hey me, now I'm with the bedside table in 5 months. Don't despair, you are neither old nor the first to lose a child. Now almost every woman loses the first, accept it as a preparation for the big match. However, I would advise you to have a thrombophilia in MD. Don't attach yourself to the mother-in-law, her time is up. Watch yourself and your husband. Promise to write here again and give us good news in time. Hugs and head up.
When you get pregnant, do you go to the doctor for an examination. You are usually told if there is a risk to the fetus. In the fourth month of pregnancy, I was told not to be very active, to lie down and drink magnesium because my cervix is short and I may give birth prematurely or sweep. It's not your fault, it's fate. Before I found out I was pregnant, I did sit-ups, rode a bike, carried heavy luggage, went on a diet - 3 days of starvation and my fetus survived. Now I'm hugging a healthy boy. I gave birth to him 20 days before term and he weighed 2,350 kg. I guess how you feel and how hard and guilty you are, but you didn't cause the miscarriage. I'm sorry you're alone and you have no consolation. I hope only your husband supports and comforts you. Otherwise, this is a myth for old age. It's all about genes and heredity. The mother-in-law gave birth to her daughter when she was 38, I have many acquaintances who have also given birth to over 35 healthy children and without complications. Success and talking to a psychologist will make you feel better
Excuse me dear, but what century are these people from and what is a remote place forgotten by civilization ???? Tighten up and don't worry. I remember at least 5 women who do not have and will never have children again. You're 34, I'm older. We are trying to have a second child and before the in vitro I just bled. Calm down, drop the explanations. Does it even make sense for you to be "guilty", I don't even comment on flat thoughts.
Wait a while and keep trying. Seek support from your husband, and don't let yourself be muttered, manipulated ... spontaneous abortions have been, are and will be and the reasons can be many.
When I went to the hospital breastfeeding and was very worried, I asked the doctor if there was a chance in the end or if I continued to invest my energy in other things. Because that's why I'm very careful, I can't work as much as before.
The doctor fell silent and then told me that if God had decided, you would have. Believe me, this helped me accept reality more easily. You are currently crushing yourself and forcibly want the miracle of a new life to happen. But this is not a pizza order.
Don't give up, darling! And don't listen to them - you're not in such a high-risk group because of your age. At 3 months, high hCG and other things from biochemical screening can be detected, but even they do not provide 100% information. Another issue is that fetuses sometimes have mutations and malformations that are incompatible with life. And sometimes miscarriages happen. I can't give you an answer as to why it happened. Here only a doctor would answer. I'm sad that you and your husband love each other so much, and you're going through it. Hold on tight to him, I believe he supports you. You will try again. I know it hurts to burn guilt, but you don't have it. You sound like an informed and conscientious woman. Advice from me: keep everyone, close, distant, friends away from your personal life. I don't believe in fortune-telling and such, but you see how they try to make sense.
Don't blame yourself and don't listen to what stupid people say to you (with an apology) and don't compare yourself to friends, acquaintances or people on the net. Spontaneous abortions most often occur in the first trimester, which is due to various reasons, which are most often associated with chromosomal changes in the fetus and the body expels it. This is nature, no one can be blamed, let alone you.
You were pregnant, not sick, and even if you lift heavy, eat spicy, salty, or whatever, it can't hurt your pregnancy.
Give yourself time to grieve and try again. If, God forbid, it happens again, look for a specialist to find out why it is happening to you and look for a solution to the problem (if there is one at all).
And, I want to tell you that your relatives are very reluctant to talk to you and treat you that way. Talk to them and do not allow such an attitude, especially in difficult times for you.
I have two healthy children and I lost one of them. I bled at the end of the second month. It's not your fault. Maybe it's good to do some research. there are topics with a similar problem. Ask there. Do not give up. You will give birth to a baby.
If you are in front of me you will eat slaps!
You lost YOUR child, not theirs!
You need support, not garbage around you.
And if your husband doesn't support you now, as you do him, and you don't fuck with your parents and him, then run away. Otherwise you will pay for it for the rest of your life!
That's how it was written! Nasty, but written!
You will have children, currently most women give birth at this age, not earlier.
Just make sure they have a secure family, that they look at you as a surrogate mother who will give birth to their child.
Either respect your personality and your pain or bear the consequences.
You let them get on your head. It's a poison that eats you up. Think about whether it's worth it.
The moment you realize it's not worth it, you'll know how to save yourself.
The same thing happened to me, but I was with twins and a young, healthy 21-year-old girl. Everyone around me was shocked at how I could lose them - first one, then a day and a half later.
It was explained to me how I had to stop working. He explained to me how I should start eating cooked. It was explained to me how I had to reduce my activity. I was just being told what I was doing wrong, but no one said, "Hey, I'm sorry, I sympathize with you." My friend decided that I had intentionally made an abortion. He was abroad on business.
A year later, I found out that I had Hashimoto, which probably led to the abortion then.
I was going through a period of depression. I cried, I was rude to people and the world, I locked myself at home for days without getting my nose out, I blocked 90% of acquaintances and relatives everywhere. I started eating as unhealthily as possible, drinking extremely nasty things, etc. I just didn't understand why it happened. After ten months, I decided to do preventive examinations of my whole body to see if there is anything that is lame - when they discovered the problem with the thyroid gland, my life was in order again. At the moment I eat healthy, I play sports, I am in perfect shape, I maintain low levels of performance and I am just waiting to meet the person for me. I am confident that my next pregnancy will be successful. Subconsciously, I am VERY scared of this moment, but in reality I really do my best to make it go smoothly.
I would recommend you to look for the reason. When you know what a problem is and you know how to solve it, you can get out of depression. Not knowing how to help yourself, the situation is not easy.
I'm sorry about what happened. Thumbs up for a successful pregnancy and happy parenting in the future!
Give yourself time to grieve for your loss, do not burden yourself with "now or never" stress. It takes a person at least two months to recover from a loss.
At the same time, do not overlook the fact that in the first three months of pregnancy the principle of "all or nothing" applies. That is, if a fruit is unable to develop for some reason (internal, its own reason, not yours!), Then the body throws it away. Unfortunately, this fruit had no chance to grow. This is not the case in which a fetus with potential dies.
What happened to you, losing a fetus in the first trimester, happens with about 25-33% of pregnancies. It does not mean that you will not take other children. One of my grandmothers gave birth to two, lost two. One of my aunts, aged 23-24, had a miscarriage, then two boys, now her grandchildren are giving birth. It happens often in nature, such is life.
And as everyone tells you - away from relatives. Don't hear them, don't see them. Disgusting people.
Still, hurry up and don't wait in vain. Depression leads to more depression and wrong decisions. So start making a child again.
I'm sorry, darling! Do not succumb to such outdated views and accusations, because you have no guilt. I'm shocked by your mother-in-law's behavior. Only one woman can understand the pain of another, and she as a mother, even if she has not suffered, must try to imagine a day without her children. I'm sure he can't. I myself have 2 girls - 3 years old and 1 year old. I am only 26 years old and I can tell you that age does not guarantee anything. Before my first child I had 2 miscarriages at 8 weeks and at 9 weeks. In one case I bled, and in the other an ultrasound showed that the baby's development had stopped. After my daughter was born, I was surprisingly pregnant with twins and at 17 weeks we had an accident. I won't go into details, but it was hell. I share my story to tell you that there are mothers like us. At the moment I can hug two children, but I went through hell for them. My advice is to join bg-mamma and you will receive the support and understanding that your loved ones obviously fail to give you. This is your first such incident and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it's the last one, but if it happens again, do some genetic research. I hope everything goes well and you hug baby soon. Be strong!
From the author:
Girls, thanks for any comment. The shared personal stories touched me deeply and gave me the support I was looking for to know that I am not the only one.
I try to charge positively and avoid negative people.
My mother-in-law obviously knows from my husband that I disapprove of the way he speaks to me and rarely visits me and even avoids talking to me.
My husband and I are considering going abroad to avoid foreign influence and constant guidance for a while, and to change the situation because he thinks I need a change.
I will also follow the research advice. Maybe I should have done it before I got pregnant, but I rarely get sick. I have no complaints about anything and I thought I was fit to have a baby.
I'm not sure about bg mama. I've been in a few times but the way they talk there is foreign to me. Half are arrogant and only brag which does not help me at this stage.
All the best girls :)
Number 14 is written by a man 100% that if you are in front of me you will eat slaps was written by a man I guessed it, Apparently there is someone younger than me who still has no children and a woman next to him
I am also an adult and I also have no children, I am 53 years old but it is not pleasant to read such things and that is why I am retiring
let's be alive and healthy
What do you care about them - if abortions up to the 3rd month were rare, it would not be accepted not to say until then. Your parents seem rather stupid and elementary to me. If it hasn't happened to them, it doesn't happen. They are full of laughter ...
I want to tell you one thing, but please remember it for a lifetime. Never allow yourself to feel GUILTY for something you deliberately did not do. Which happens out of your control, which you don't want to happen, but it happened.
This is not a fault. Guilt is our conscious behavior in order for this or that to happen.
The other can be an obstacle, a trial, even a punishment in some higher sense coming from above, but never guilt.
This is from me. Remember it forever and always remember a stranger who tells you, whenever you try to blame yourself for events beyond your control.
The rest will be fine. The baby is waiting for you.
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