"To be laughed at" is the horror of limited intellect, the nightmare of the little man who has taken himself so seriously that the very thought of someone undermining his inflatable ego numbs him and fills him with anger. The pathetic post-totalitarian enslavement of fabricated authorities has its say. The main argument for protection from humorous arrows is contained in the highly conceptual self-affirming spell: "You know who I am, yes." Yes, we know very well - you are the little man who does not joke.
No way. Childhood injuries. You were very crushed, and this is now your defensive reaction. And I have it, I lost all my friends in adulthood. Now he howled like a Siberian wolf. Try to control it, my friend, so that you don't come to my place.
If a person doesn't like to be stabbed with his "humorous arrows", why not just apologize and stop this behavior? I most often notice how people are literally bullied, especially if a "humorist" smells that the first ones don't like it or that they don't have the necessary darsal, social condition or simple mood to respond appropriately. crushing the other person's ego. If it turns out that both sides are "on an equal footing", there are no problems, but otherwise, you have to press and crush? Why? What is this mania to spoil someone else's mood? "Word does not make a hole"? It is clear that you do not care about the feelings of others, but to call anyone who does not associate you with numbers "limited intellect" and "little man" is pure malice.
If the problem is not ridicule, but gossip about things done in the past, then you are more annoyed by the fact that they remind you of some nonsense you did (or cut). In a sense, you want to forget, as if this thing never happened, but someone is ruining your "plans" for everything to be so, as if the mistake in question from the past does not exist at all. I'm like you too. I just try not to answer anything. It's as if I forgot about what happened and that's why I'm not interested in this joke.
It's called speech hygiene. Unfortunately, Bulgarians have black humor and have no limits to their talk. That's where the problem comes from.
Number 3 ... What a mockery to be reminded of a funny incident from your past? I'm sorry, but if you can't laugh at your mistakes and your possible stupid behavior in the past, then you just don't accept yourself and pretend to be someone you are - someone sinless, perfect, etc. For me, this is is pure autoaggression.
Now, what levels? I don't believe in levels. I can have a good conversation with both the circulator and the associate professor, especially if conscious people have tamed the Ego. In an instant I change the academic language with street, I do not claim to be more or less. Everyone surpasses me in one way, and I surpass him in another. What to measure, I do not know? Does sensitivity divide us into levels?
Ok, I accept the role of low sensitivity. Come on, please explain to me why someone's feelings are more important than mine? Why should I comply and not the sensitive person with me? Does he have no disease? That he even surpasses me in his ability to be patient, to understand others, he will probably be more creative than me, he will understand the details. Is it my fault he doesn't know how much? So I have to comply with the person in order for him to express his qualities by giving up his own - to be proactive, sincere, objective, to show a sense of humor, to stand up for himself, to organize people. Why? Because someone will have a hard time with it, and it's hard for me to walk around this someone in slippers. It costs a lot of energy.
You will take care of my feelings, isn't it a little escape from responsibility? Isn't it right for me to take care of yours, you take care of yours? It may be a cliché, but no one can hurt you without your consent, you decide whether to accept his opinion as true. If your head is full of self-criticism and complexes and you have the illusion that you have to be perfect and pursue a "level" ... then every remark will pierce you and remind you that you are not good enough. You will have the feeling that people are constantly focused on your mistakes and they are waiting for you to go wrong.
What is the drama of kicking this Ego a little and accepting that you are an ordinary person, yourself and you will only become a better version of yourself? That you will fail, you will become a laughing stock, you will shake a lot of nonsense in your life, there will be people who will not like you, someone will consider you dumb, another a fool. You will meet a lot of smart people, you will feel stupid sometimes. Well, and? And if you hold the claims of the Ego firmly, you will still not slip away, you will simply find it harder to pass, or you will stop altogether.
Once you realize things (unlike various complex complexes, which also have a fragile ego, but hide it under threatening comments), you can change it. It is normal for our brain, because it is an energy-efficient machine, to use established models, because change requires energy. That is, change will not be easy - you will need a long time to observe yourself and make an effort.
1 daisypmm8 answered