I Don't Understand Myself

The Story

Hello, I am a woman of 38 years. I do not know how to start - I have never been able to express my feelings. I want to tell you about a love. 20 years ago I had a long relationship with a man I loved very much, but he was not suitable for me. He cheated on me, sometimes humiliating me. Now I see my mistakes, but then I blamed him for everything and when my dream came true and he proposed marriage to me, and by the way, he cheated on me again, I abandoned him. I got married. A month later, he married.

For those 20 years, he did not stop cheating on his wife and did not stop trying to renew his relationship with me. But I was not interested - my life is not like in fairy tales, but I have a husband who loves and respects me, does not cheat on me. We raised wonderful children. Over the years, I have become a beautiful and confident woman, I built a career - what more could I want and why should I complicate my life. But 6 months ago he died and unexpectedly for me I suffer. I always thought I hadn't loved him in a long time, and now for six months, I don't want to accept that I will never see him again. Otherwise, everything is fine in my life, but then why does it hurt. About the departing youth or about the fact that we have been apart all our lives and there are many unsaid things left between us, and now it is gone ...

Last Updated
July 23, 2020
Author:
bigd22245

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