I Don't Know What To Do, I Feel Empty And Unnecessary.

So, hello everyone. My story is no different from the others on the site, but I would be very happy if someone could give me advice or help me in some way. I'll start like this, I'm an 18-year-old boy, until a week ago I was in a relationship with a very good and decent girl. Things were going well, but a month before our separation, she somehow began to behave more withdrawn, cold and strange. For the first few days, I thought she was in a bad mood, and I tried to talk to her, give and share how she felt, and if I could help, yeah, almost always when there was something to do with her, whether it was a problem or something. another, when I asked her what was wrong, why she was depressed, she said "Nothing!", it was more than clear to me. that it was nothing, he did not explain to me as much as I insisted. I think that here would be the best place to insert our story before our relationship. About 5 months ago I tried to get closer to another girl, but I never succeeded, I was very confused, but in the end I came out very happy with the whole situation, and I was quite happy, even I could not believe it, and so 2 weeks . I met the girl I was talking about in the story with a mutual friend, and over time I realized that she liked me, I didn't know what to do because I had no experience in relationships, and I hadn't had one until now. We wrote to each other for a month I was quite happy. I wasn't sure how to act until one day I decided to go to them and tell her that I wanted to give her a chance, to try what it was like to be in a relationship, and I wanted to be with her now. Everything went more than perfect, I emphasize very thickly perfect, we wrote to each other constantly when we could, every day began with "Good Morning," and every night ended with "Good Night." But over time she stopped with those words and it became a little strange to me, I was aware that feelings disappear and decrease with time, and I said well, she may forget, and I continued with "Good morning" and "Good night" ". Over time, she cut down on kind words and sentences, barely mentioning "I love you" even in chats. It was getting weirder and weirder. He had to go abroad for a few days, and during those days he behaved as before, saying "Good Morning" and "Good Night," even saying "Nice" to me several times instead of the other nicknames we used to say. She seemed quite happy to me, which I was very happy about, she had to come back one Sunday, and she mentioned that we wouldn't be able to see each other because she was tired, I got into a position and I was looking forward to seeing her in the next few days, when we went out that same Sunday with friends, we were out of something like that at 6:30 pm 7 pm, and as I was going down the stairs at my entrance, I heard the voice and I was able to see a very small part of her body to make sure it was her. I couldn't believe my eyes, I was very happy with what I saw, she had surprised me that I didn't suspect a gram of, I will always remember the look with which she looked at me, such a happy smile, warmed me inside, I won't even lie , just melted me. She is the most beautiful girl I have ever met. By the end of the day, I was in seventh heaven, but like everything with my time, the next week she started this strange demeanor, withdrawn and cold, when I wanted to hug or kiss her, she pulled lightly and came out with an apology, that it annoyed me on purpose, but I didn't feel that way. Another week later she called me to talk about something very important, I had a feeling that things were not going well, and I was right, she wanted to separate because of problems in her personal life, but we agreed to take time, I was ready to wait as long as necessary because I love her and want to be with her. 3 days later she wrote me that for her the holiday was over and she wanted us to be together again, I was very happy. A few days later she behaved as if we were at the beginning of our relationship, we were very happy, we were .... or at least I .... Two weeks later I would go to them to stay for the evening, but she wrote not to hurry, because she wanted to organize her thoughts, I had a bad feeling that I would be left alone. After 1 hour I wrote that I was getting on and I got on them in the fastest way. I went in and saw her standing, upset and swollen. We talked and decided to separate because of her, she told me that the thrill between us had disappeared or at least on her part, she did not feel it as before, she felt like she was 50 years old with me. I didn't know what and how to say, react and do. I turned to her and asked her if she wanted us to break up permanently, she said yes ... and I took my things and went out, but before that I hugged her as if I would never see her again. We remained friends, we hadn't seen each other for a few days, and yesterday I realized that we would see each other, I don't know how to describe the feeling I felt when I realized this, shortly before she came, I didn't stop looking for her until I saw her ... and I shivered, I wanted the moment she came, to hug her, to hold her, and to hold her, to kiss her and to rejoice in her, but when she came I was very cruelly mistaken, I just hugged her, and I couldn't say a word. During those days when she was gone, my mood was rippling, I was happy, I was depressed, but mostly depressed. Absolutely those I saw told me to move on, that life went on, yes, but I didn't feel that way .... I wanted my girl, my baby, but she didn't want to be with me, she just wanted us to be friends, and we are quite good. But I can't forget how things were, and I really want her to be with me again, she keeps telling me that it's better to be like brother and sister than boyfriends, but I know mine and I want her very much, I love her very much and I can't accept her as a friend yet, I can't make such a big decision with a light hand, I experience such things very hard. So please, if you can, share your opinion, advice or personal experience, Do you think things can happen again as they were before, I love her very much, I want to make her the happiest girl in the world, if I could I would give her the world, but alas I can't. I feel hellishly lonely, empty, unnecessary and lethargic, it all affects me very seriously, even when I'm driving I'm not on my own. I still can't believe how she decided so quickly and easily that she wants us to break up, after all the things we've been through together, to this day I think it's like a test, to see if I love her and if I will some nonsense with which to lose her, but no I'm not like that, I care a lot about her, and I only want her, I have no eyes for another. She is my only one! I'm asking for help. Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I want to make her the happiest girl in the world, if I could I would give her the world, but alas I can't. I feel hellishly lonely, empty, unnecessary and lethargic, it all affects me very seriously, even when I'm driving I'm not on my own. I still can't believe how she decided so quickly and easily that she wants us to break up, after all the things we've been through together, to this day I think it's like a test, to see if I love her and if I will some nonsense with which to lose her, but no I'm not like that, I care a lot about her, and I only want her, I have no eyes for another. She is my only one! I'm asking for help. Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I want to make her the happiest girl in the world, if I could I would give her the world, but alas I can't. I feel hellishly lonely, empty, unnecessary and lethargic, it all affects me very seriously, even when I'm driving I'm not on my own. I still can't believe how she decided so quickly and easily that she wants us to break up, after all the things we've been through together, to this day I think it's like a test, to see if I love her and if I will some nonsense with which to lose her, but no I'm not like that, I care a lot about her, and I only want her, I have no eyes for another. She is my only one! I'm asking for help. Thank you for taking the time to read my story. even when I drive I'm not on my own. I still can't believe how she decided so quickly and easily that she wants us to break up, after all the things we've been through together, to this day I think it's like a test, to see if I love her and if I will some nonsense with which to lose her, but no I'm not like that, I care a lot about her, and I only want her, I have no eyes for another. She is my only one! I'm asking for help. Thank you for taking the time to read my story. even when I drive I'm not on my own. I still can't believe how she decided so quickly and easily that she wants us to break up, after all the things we've been through together, to this day I think it's like a test, to see if I love her and if I will some nonsense with which to lose her, but no I'm not like that, I care a lot about her, and I only want her, I have no eyes for another. She is my only one! I'm asking for help. Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I'm asking for help. Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I'm asking for help. Thank you for taking the time to read my story.