I Don't Know What To Do

   In my opinion, your relationship has absolutely no future; I don't want to be completely negative or act like a bad prophet, but I've been in such a relationship, I've burned myself, and I already know. I will tell you with examples - my ex-boyfriend and I were in an almost similar situation: he had recently broken up with his last girlfriend, they had been together for a long time, and he was left with unanswered doubts about whether she had cheated on him while he was in Sofia. and she in her hometown. All the time I was making surprises, I was thinking about the occasions, I was buying, he was behaving somehow semi-distanced with the huge difference that I would define him as an extremely tanned individual; as if with him everything was based only on sex, he rarely talked about feelings and love, but on the other hand he actively communicated with his ex-girlfriend in spite of everything, and I was even his personal psychologist many times during our relationship, because the boy was sick, you see, of something related to the girl in question. Well ... I was patient, I was patient, I explained to him calmly, he didn't understand anything, it was as if I was talking on a wall, he even started behaving badly with me, insulting and grieving me. It came to me more, crushed my feminine dignity, stepped on me steadily and I had no choice but to leave. If you want someone to be rude to you, go on with him, because, you know, having been with someone for a long time, with whom you obviously do not want to be, but you have no choice, because you do not stand alone (he according to your story looks like me), you firmly hate the person you are with, because he is not the one you want, do you understand what I mean? Protect yourself, be smart and mature in the situation and find someone to court you, to love you, both in words and deeds, to support you, to be the one who is proactive and resourceful, to make surprises, etc. You deserve it, I'm sure. Don't stay where you are not happy. Everything will be fine when you leave. Don't feel sorry for him at all, he certainly does enough on his own. I wish you a lot of success and dare, people like him should not be around a good and patient person like you!

   Love exists, but for a short time in most cases. In the very beginning. He built walls around himself so he wouldn't be hurt again. Fight fire with fire. You leave him too, but seriously. When a person loses, he appreciates. He will look for you himself. Pull him a little.

   It's easy when you like to deceive yourself and justify it, but think about it, are you ready to lose your best years, your life for a boy who obviously doesn't love you? There is no one who does not care with whom he will start a family (read between the lines). A man is in love with him, and when he is not, even more. How many more things have to happen to realize. He suffers from his ex, looks at the profile, and you buy him gifts and sex from the rain in the wind .. .girl don't be humiliated..The whole life is in front of you, don't waste your time.

   He's still in love with his ex, and he's holding you ... And I don't know why, maybe just because you're standing. Get rid of him, you won't have a normal relationship with him.

   You're wasting your time with this man. There is no love with you, rather it is only one-sided ... Apparently she has residual feelings for her ex and that is when she looks at her profile. I think he's looking for her in you, but something doesn't work out for him. At some point, things will escalate. You pamper him because you love him, but it's not good because he starts taking you for granted ... I don't know, this is not the behavior of a man in love or a man who loves you. When roles change, it usually means that something is not right. Share your problem with him to clarify. Just so you don't have to worry. If he refuses, then your communication is not working ... then where are we going at all? :) I wouldn't call him a "man", rather an injured boy who started a relationship in the hope of getting rid of his sadness. It would only hurt you because it transfers it to you.

   Sorry for the question, but are you kidding? Follows the profile of his ex, claims that love does not exist. How much more obvious to demonstrate that he had not yet experienced it. And don't get me wrong, I'm not judging you. I had the same relationship, I loved madly to admit to myself that it was one-way and to leave. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, but it was the right thing to do. Open your eyes before it's too late.

   I boiled and boiled in such relationships. Pouring it with a funnel can't give him a brain. Prepare for the worst and slap him. If he doesn't want to hear you and continue in the same way, go and don't turn around. He will come to roar at your door and if you try again, in two months it will be the same. People said, "Nice apples, pigs eat them." For 20 years I have been looking for one like you, and not for gifts or gestures, but at least for human attitude and understanding. But as I said above in the proverb, good people are always bad. I can no longer search and make a connection, but you are at this age. Look for the person who will be your support with your views on life. Your friend has been firmly filmed and will not be noticed soon. But waiting 4-5 years for him to tell you that he doesn't want a child and a family is not worth it.

   He doesn't love you. I bet the guys. Brother.

   The former did not get sick. No matter how hard you try, he doesn't love you. It's obvious. He's just with you so he's not alone. If you have dignity and self-respect you will leave it. If you can't, carry your cross, no one can help you but yourself.

   It seems extremely humiliating to me to tell you that I do not believe in love and to follow my ex-girlfriend. What is your role then? He didn't care which woman he was with. Are you an object? Leave him alone and don't give him any chance at all. You are too young to limit yourself to opportunities for a happier life.

   Trying to heal with you-normal reaction of an injured person. You decide if you agree with that. I do not agree at all with №7-that he will come to roar at your door. It will not come - in his head is only the former. Well, you will still overcome it someday, but what warms you. Don't let them use you that way.

   As long as you accept and forgive such a super unacceptable attitude and think "here, I forgave this too, I compromised with that, I hope now he understands how much I love him and starts appreciating me more" he thinks "A normal person would not tolerate such an attitude of my wife and there is something when I trample her, she most strongly demonstrates her love for me.For example, I would not tolerate this, I have my dignity.She has no dignity, how can I respect such a person ?! to be guilty and for her to call to apologize and say that she understands why I did that. She obviously likes me to crush her. She will forgive me everything, because I am almost her whole life, she is not maybe without me, pathetic job. Is this a normal person? "These individuals only love you when one of your feet is out. They don't even love you. They love your zero expectations of them, they love that they don't have to worry about you. You feed his Ego and he already thinks you have to be patient if you want to be with "such a cool person like him". You teach him how much he deserves, and how little you. He is only asked to be himself, that is enough. And you have to constantly change and improve. When they lose, they don't think "she was a wonderful woman", but "now who will tolerate me". Its All about them. If you are familiar with the listed characteristics, run with 300 and do not look back: -they sometimes make God, sometimes sacrifice (often even in a conversation) -you are sometimes his queen, sometimes the lowest sole -when you want to say how do you feel, you get in response "you're crazy", "what am I to blame for this" or something like that, which aims to declare your feelings invalid and his feelings correct. -you almost don't know who you are anymore, you almost don't remember what you did before the relationship with him, everything comes to you pointlessly. You feel trapped and believe that you can't be happy without it. You think you've invested too much to leave. -He does not get along with his parents, he has addictions, he is emotionally unstable. -He is super impressive outside and everyone likes him, and at home he is quiet and even boring. -Somehow, you always come out guilty. -You feel that his friends and even strangers get better treatment and can rely more on him. -You often justify his behavior in front of other people, as if you are responsible for him. It has nothing to do with love, it is an addiction. It's a game of hot and cold, whose goal is to be in constant uncertainty and not be able to even think about leaving. The only good thing about these people is that they are hellishly predictable. I can tell you exactly how parting with one is when you're ready for it. Because it will not be easy for you. I know you're thinking at the moment, "nonsense, I'm leaving and he's not going to look for me." I will include notifications on your topic, because I really sympathize with you. Just when you're ready, write and I'll try to prepare you for the final circus.

   I'm in your friend's situation. 5 years of unrequited love. I, too, will never love another as I love this girl, so I have no desire for sex, I have not done so and I think (until now I lived without sex and now I can) because only I can hurt a girl, I'm not looking for a girlfriend . I advise you to leave him.

   12, I'm not the author, but I think I've stepped firmly into the scheme you described. What can you say about the separation?

   To number 12 from number 1: I can't say it better! You have no idea how right you are. Regarding the separation - for me with the individual matching your description ended as follows: I explained to him that I could no longer tolerate his selfish and egocentric behavior, as well as his presence of complete disinterest, he was given arguments in a very calm way, through to prove to him that he is in fact exactly what I think he is. In response to all this, I received the following: "Don't bother me, you are emotionally unstable and live forever in your dramas and tales. "I expected some understanding from him at least in the end (and what hopes I lived with), but this was completely missing. There were words from me that we were finishing and I did not want him to look for me in any way. From him I received only the indifferent and equal: "I do not know what to tell you. Okay. “. Then, in a final outburst, I only stated that no girl would be able to tolerate him with his behavior. This was our last conversation. To the author I can only say the following: do not be afraid, do not be afraid, after you separate you will feel much better. I came to the conclusion that with him and without him, she is still the same. I don't even know why I was in a relationship at all, given that at the moment I feel the way I felt in her, with the small difference that no one poisons my nerves, insults me, etc. It's literally like I'm not she was with no one and now, as I am alone, this period continues, but with more smiles. You will realize that he only led you to bad and undermining your thoughts, unpleasant habits in relationships, from which you must unlearn (to follow someone as if he were the master of the universe). Respect and choose yourself. You will live with yourself all your life, regardless of relationships, family, etc. It is not worth hating yourself (without realizing it) just because you are in love with a literally ego-manic individual who is neither completely in the relationship nor completely out of it. Needless to say, people like him are just waiting for the better "fish" that will actually treat them relatively badly because they have a staggering lack of self-esteem. Get out of this toxic relationship and seek your luck, as they say. There are exceptional men with dignified behavior who give both kindly and gladly to touch a person like you, believe me. It is not worth hating yourself (without realizing it) just because you are in love with a literally ego-manic individual who is neither completely in the relationship nor completely out of it. Needless to say, people like him are just waiting for the better "fish" that will actually treat them relatively badly because they have a staggering lack of self-esteem. Get out of this toxic relationship and seek your luck, as they say. There are exceptional men with dignified behavior who give both kindly and gladly to touch a person like you, believe me. It is not worth hating yourself (without realizing it) just because you are in love with a literally ego-manic individual who is neither completely in the relationship nor completely out of it. Needless to say, people like him are just waiting for the better "fish" that will actually treat them relatively badly because they have a staggering lack of self-esteem. Get out of this toxic relationship and seek your luck, as they say. There are exceptional men with dignified behavior who give both kindly and gladly to touch a person like you, believe me. Get out of this toxic relationship and seek your luck, as they say. There are exceptional men with dignified behavior who give both kindly and gladly to touch a person like you, believe me. Get out of this toxic relationship and seek your luck, as they say. There are exceptional men with dignified behavior who give both kindly and gladly to touch a person like you, believe me.

   12 described my relationship (I am 5) and I am very interested in what she will say about the separation, she has already left the separation, but I want to see if it overlaps. :)

   The author. To number 12, will you tell me what can happen if I break up with him? Everything described is me ... Shit ... and I'm afraid to break up with him, that's the worst part. I'm afraid of what I will do next with my life. I am a very sensitive person and I know that I will be very depressed.

   And I'm not the author, but just like number 14 I expect inclusion from 12 ... If you can help, go! I am in a similar situation. F23.

   Author and others in her position - treat the person as he allows. If you do not have enough character, self-confidence and self-esteem - you will be crushed and you will suffer. If you do not have the will to end the relationship, you will continue to suffer. If you do not have the courage to go on alone and are afraid to take your life in your hands - you choose the humiliation of being someone's substitute. There is no other alternative. The man doesn't love you and won't love you like that, miraculously like in a pink novel. The choice is yours.

   Hi girls, I'm number 12. There is a lot of information, both for writing and for perception. The situation described above represents the interdependent relations. They occur in relationships with an addict or with a person in the spectrum of antisocial personality disorders (narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths). You will first fight with yourself. In addition to the emotional dependence we have on our partner, we also have a real physical one. You will feel as if you are on a diet or as if you are quitting smoking. And that's exactly what's happening. All the stress that accompanies this relationship, this game of hot and cold, actually changes the biochemistry of the brain. He is addicted to reconciliation, to "repairing" the relationship, to love bombing. So, just accept that you will go through a period of grief. And I promise you that when you are free, you will feel as if some fog has lifted and you, your life and potential will blossom. Just as when the nicotine hunger passes, one day the ex-smoker realizes that the taste of the food is better, the aromas more intense, that they have more tone and are more beautiful, stronger. This will happen to you and your life will stop revolving around the thrown crumbs of good attitude. You will begin to feel satisfied with yourself again, full of potential, able to enjoy your friends and hobbies, even though you have long since given them up to be available. However, when a smoker stops smoking, holes of free time open up in his daily life, you will also have such holes of free time, which until now have been occupied by worries and thoughts about your partner. And you will feel emptiness as you get used to your new life, until you fill your time with useful activities. But girls, just think, if you had directed all this love, care and understanding towards yourself and not towards him, what kind of person would you be today? So, here are the first steps to mental release: 1. Realizing that you are in a toxic relationship. Read about codependent relationships. 2. Understanding why you chose this partner. As banal as it is, it all comes from childhood trauma. You choose a partner with whom to play the situation from childhood and "repair" it. This happens subconsciously and is not at all obvious. For example, if you have a surgeon father and you have not received the necessary presence and attention, you will stubbornly avoid workaholics. But you can choose an unemployed football fan who constantly goes somewhere. Attention and presence are still missing, the common is the feeling. You may have had a demanding parent and now a partner who suggests that you can't pour a glass of water properly. You build the same situation and give yourself the opportunity to repair it, believing that if you try hard and put a lot of love this time you will succeed, but failures do not show you that this cause is lost, failures make you try even harder. You begin to measure your love by the suffering you take on. It's like the struggle of your life to prove that you deserve presence and attention. If you want to realize the trauma and stop choosing partners with whom to "repair" it, I advise you to read the books "Paranoia of passion. A guide for women who love too much." And "Never again codependent." These books will help you to separate mentally from your partner. Separate your opinion of yourself from his. I know what crap you've heard about yourself, don't believe them. How is someone who is not interested in your feelings and thoughts aware of your abilities and potential? This is a manipulation. 3. Familiarize yourself with the manipulation techniques. Just as the world of an alcoholic or drug addict revolves around the acquisition of substance, so the world of a person in the spectrum of antisocial personality disorders revolves around the acquisition of power, attention, and adoration. I do not know how to translate it, narcissistic supply, I will tell him a dose of greatness. These people's houses will collapse as they drive nails into friends, because there is no greatness in performing their normal duties. But there is a dose of greatness in helping another, winning another debtor, to appear cool in public. They are more responsive and kind even to strangers than to you. Because you have already been won and because attention and greatness can be a negative sign, you are accepting quite unacceptable behavior anyway. Have you ever been terribly insulted or attacked and then said that he did not think these things, that he could not control himself, that you provoked him. They never take responsibility. But if all the harassment is "unintentional," why doesn't it happen to other people, why doesn't it happen to them outside? The truth is, they know what they're doing to you and they like it. They get a dose of greatness, they think "how strong I am, I can cry it in two words, I have complete control over it. If I decide, I can ruin it, if I decide I can raise it". They don't love you, they love their power over you. I know it sucks. This is also a manipulation. They remember like elephants, they know your weaknesses and you often feel that everything you say can be used against you. In the future, when you already know this type of people, I advise you not to share personal information with them. They are so manipulative that when you argue with them, it's as if you're listening to your inner critical monologue. This destroys your self-esteem. You begin to wonder why you belong to this person at all and what he does to you when he has such a low opinion. Thus, over time, it creates an attitude that almost does you a favor to be with you, and you have to endure horrors to deserve this favor. This is also a manipulation. Blaming, declaring your feelings invalid and theirs correct, avoiding conversation, lying, flattery, silent punishment - all these are methods of manipulation. Study them, read about emotional manipulators. It won't be enough for me to tell you about all their methods, but I want to tell you about this one: Flattery. The relationship with such an individual starts crazy, with fireworks and the feeling that you have found a soulmate and then turns into a horror movie. The English term is Love bombing. In the beginning it presented itself to you as the perfect one, it was too good to be true, wasn't it? Well, because it is not. Your nature of codependence sees irresponsibility, aggression, distance, coldness, quite differently, as a free spirit, strength, mystery, need for love. You are so excited about the idea of ​​earning the presence and attention of the Ideal that you miss all the red lights that things are not normal at all. The manipulative nature of your partner gives him the opportunity to present himself to you as the ideal tool for "repair". After a while, however, the Ideal hides in the bottom of the forest and only another breakdown of the relationship can bring him back (for a while). When they are afraid (strongly speaking, they don't really care much) that you will leave, they start bombarding you with love, flattering you and promising you everything you want to hear. For example, that they need you and only you can change them. It's even funny to them that you believe them. They get an eruption of greatness that can make you believe everything they tell you. I think she's completely under my control. And you, in the euphoria they create for you, begin to care even more, to accept and believe that if you really try, it will change. He does not and does not want to change, he actually believes that he is some higher being who, like the Lord, controls the behavior and thoughts of people. He doesn't think, "I'm a terrible liar and a manipulator," but "what can I do that others aren't smart enough to do?" ... To be continued

   From 14 to 12/20: I realized these things, I read "Paranoia of passion. Women who love too much.". Now I take care of myself, I live my life, not his, and I have realized what manipulations we have applied to each other. To each other, because the book really describes well how we do it ourselves and attract such men by encouraging them to show their side without realizing it. I communicate, at the moment I only communicate with other men, there is no lack of attention or opportunities for another. But when I tried to have sex with someone else, it didn't work. My body was literally refusing to let it into me, and I hadn't had sex in a long time. I don't miss his attitude most of the time, nor the quarrels. But I miss him. I can't rip out my feelings for him and step on them, and it's not like I don't want to. I know that I deserve more and want to get more. I know it's not my job to change it. But his other side, I miss her terribly. How do I fix this? Because I did the other thing, but I can't do it. I still smile when something comes up around me that reminds me of his name. My heart is still pounding as I remember hugging me. How?

   The author. To number 20. I found it very interesting. If you can ... Will there be a sequel? Your logic is really terribly rigid. Your man is firmly on the ground and we will be really interested in the sequel. Let me explain why most girls and women are interested in the topic. There are women who have very strong self-confidence and high standards who would not succumb to such manipulations ... It is understandable that no one wants to be a slave. But as you said at the beginning of the relationship, men are bombarded with love, flattery, promises, which they keep only until you catch them. And that's where the nightmare begins. The woman falls in love with your idea of ​​him as a perfect man and a walk of torment begins. Why walk in torment? For at some time his husband is stricken with his wife, she is tied in a towel and doesn't try to impress her so much anymore, she becomes unhappy with time, because she gets used to it and takes it for granted, she starts looking for attention elsewhere, because obviously his ego doesn't have enough attention from the woman next to him who loves him .... And she, with her attempt to make him feel happy and alive again, becomes obsessive about keeping him. Jealousy, mistrust, etc. begin ... From there, quarrels and disputes begin. Women become annoying with their questions about feelings. Some movies start .... Anointed full .... The woman forgets herself, forgets what she was like before the relationship, forgets that she is a woman. And the man slowly with manipulations and insults and all sorts of words like,, you will not be able to recover without me,, or,, your feelings and thoughts are not right,, begin to affect your subconscious, that you are not good for anything and you imagine that you really can't become a person without your,,, help,, ... I can say my opinion on the issue. These people suffer from complexes. Some of them have had problems in the past, and when they see vulnerable prey, they cling to it in order to feel majestic and raise their ego that someone loves them, and they play with it like a puppeteer with a doll. From my personal experience I can tell my situation what all this tension, nerves, insecurity and others consist of. My friend has been hurt by his first love in the past. She treated me the same way he treated me. Everything is like a chain reaction. He did his best for her and she behaved like complete shit with behavior and everything, she even cheated on him. Apparently such people change their opinion about love over time ... I know. . Not that he can't forget her, but he feels nostalgia for his good moments with the presence of love in his life when he was with her. Strange but true, more and more people hate love because of people like her ... Because you just got the wrong one. I learned my lesson. In life, people come and go. The important thing is to stay true to yourself and believe in the idea that love exists and has always existed. Tackle this chain reaction and don't allow yourself to become like them. PS I will look at the books he described. Thank you very much for the answer !!! In life, people come and go. The important thing is to stay true to yourself and believe in the idea that love exists and has always existed. Tackle this chain reaction and don't allow yourself to become like them. PS I will look at the books he described. Thank you very much for the answer !!! In life, people come and go. The important thing is to stay true to yourself and believe in the idea that love exists and has always existed. Tackle this chain reaction and don't allow yourself to become like them. PS I will look at the books he described. Thank you very much for the answer !!!

   4. Let's say we have discovered our emotional trauma. It can be a lack of love, attention, approval, presence at all. And we have realized that only we can fill this gap by giving ourselves personal time, love for ourselves, by daring to forgive ourselves and be happier with ourselves (sounds easy, but it's a process ). Awareness automatically releases us and we rarely need the approval and attention of our partner. The miracles of courage, the acrobatics that we have done so far to satisfy our partner, are already starting to seem like a waste of time, we now understand that in order to be happy and full we must shift the focus on ourselves. There's a saying, "Don't do for another what you wouldn't do for yourself," and we're beginning to understand its meaning. that in these relationships we will not develop as individuals, we will not be able to have good friendships, we will not be able to develop professionally, we will not be able to take care of ourselves. Because our strength and inspiration will be exhausted in caring for the partner, in staring at his problems, in trying to keep him in a good mood. We are also aware that solving the partner's problem will not solve our problems. If you've read the books I've suggested, you may have realized that in most cases, when a person recovers from an addiction, he prefers to start living with a new partner rather than stay in the relationship where he will have to "fix the debts." ". The woman in this relationship, already deprived of social, professional and personal life, is left without a situation for repair and only then she looks at herself and sees that she has not developed her personality. He gets depressed. She is very likely to repeat the scenario with another man. And to make matters worse. But you will not be this woman. You already know the manipulation and realize that communication with your partner is woven of manipulation. You begin to understand that you are not a favorite, but a thread doll project, or even a slave project. In fact, if you're not sure yet, now that you want to shift the focus to yourself, you'll understand. A normal person would be happy for you to improve and be happy. A person on the spectrum - no, he will worry that you will not be available to him, he does not want anything else to make you happy, he does not want you to have self-confidence and will try to sabotage you. You may decide to start playing sports, learning a foreign language, going out once a week with friends. He will either call your new activity stupid and pointless, or pretend that he likes your idea, but every time it's time for a new activity, or something will happen to him so that you don't go and stay fixed. some problem, or will come up with new activities together. For example, until now during the weekend you lay down and watched TV, you decide to spend this time more productively, to be on a course, to spend the day with your parents and he finally, after months of begging on your part decides to organize on this day travel outside the city. You say to yourself, "OK, I'll go to the course next week," and he says, "I'm still in control, there's nothing more important than me," and if you decide to say, "I already have plans for the day," he'll go crazy right away. will act as a victim and tell you something like " then don't say I don't want to do things together, you're ignoring me, not me. "But you already know it's manipulation. If things haven't gotten serious yet and the control over you isn't so great yet as soon as you focus on yourself, he will leave on his own. He will not tolerate, not being the center of your world, he will not tolerate you being your center, even though this is the most normal thing. Also, if you discredit him and tell him, "You know, you're not as big, you're not as smart, you're not as big as you think. I don't admire you at all anymore. "In the end, he is revealed, he can no longer receive his dose of greatness from you. He will give you one last humiliation and leave. Because under the mask of the Omnipresent, hides a terribly complex being who actually hates and does not believe, that someone can love him. that everyone loves the mask, and whoever claims to love himself is either not normal or is just lying. That is why they do not rely on love, but on control. However, if you already take care of him as a baby, or directly as a disabled person, if he already spends half your salary, if he lives in your home, if he has already separated you from friends and relatives. If it already feels like the only thing you live for. Then it will be very difficult to give up your project. It doesn't matter how the separation came about, whether you said "enough, I don't want to be together anymore" or he lost you (he only does it to startle you, he even takes his luggage for only a day or two). He is absolutely sure that you will run back as before. If you really want to get rid of it you have to COMPLETELY TERMINATE CONTACT. Otherwise, he will enchant you, will slip you back into the trap of control, he knows how, so far he has always succeeded, right? Here's what usually happens: 1. You break up and make contact. You don't pick up his phone, or if it's impossible (you have children, a common business, a home) you pick up and talk only on the topics of children, work remotely, in a controlled way, without adding a gram of emotion. He feeds on emotions - you give him a dose. You block it on social networks. He will still find a way to follow you, through an acquaintance's profile, or through a fake profile. He wants to know what you are doing without him and secretly hopes that you will miss him terribly and suffer. So, no quotes, no love songs, no "I got insight into life" posts. This only gives him a dose of grandeur and shows him that he still has control. Do not explode in uploading photos from the gym, do not drastically change your look. All this gives him strength "I'm not easy to complain, huh?" The goal is to create the picture "with you, without you all this", "I'm the same person, I just don't need you anymore", "I'm self-sufficient , I don't need to change to love and like myself "2. He feels he is losing control, you don't rush after him. He urgently needs to regain control. Appears in front of your home or at work. Powerful Love bombing begins. The ideal returns, aware of all his mistakes, ready to change, madly in love, and you are the Woman, the most special, the most beautiful, the only one for whom an effort will be made. It will be hard to resist. Even if you hear all this for a million times. But imagine that you succeed. "I've heard that before. Change for yourself. I'm done." He is very likely to threaten suicide. Don't get tied up. The ubiquitous will not deprive the world of its presence. 3. Smear campaign and flying monkeys. It's about their entourage, those insane people who don't know his dark side at all. It shines brightly in front of them, straight like the sun, and they cannot imagine the quiet, gloomy rapist you live with. Expect inclusion from these people. Common acquaintances, theirs, even your relatives may be on the list of flying monkeys. They will contact you and start telling you how the Omnipresent has changed for the better since he has been with you (Good for whom ?! As his attitude toward you progressively deteriorates.) How your separation taught him a lesson, how he has learned a lesson and now everything will be fine (for what time ?!) And how do you just have to give him another chance. Be sure, that these conversations will be literally passed on to him, and act as if you were talking to him. Don't waste your time telling stories and complaining about the nightmare. They will not believe you, they believe your eyes - he is smiling, funny, cool, ready to help them. They've been manipulated, you know. Don't let their words work for you, he speaks through them. Just say, "Do you really think so, I'll be happy if it changes / fixes. But I'm not happy about it and I've already made up my mind. If you invited me to talk about it, I'd rather leave." Point. To the questions "how are you, don't you miss it?", Calmly answer "I'm fine, everything is normal." You can still cry at night, or you can already dance the dance of joy - do not share your emotions. The purpose is not to irritate or hurt the former, but to get rid of it. When the flying monkeys fail, a smear campaign begins. The campaign to spit on you. You will be presented as bad people, selfish, misunderstood, unwilling to fight for the relationship / marriage, and they as your victim. Very difficult situation, but this way you will sift the people who really love and care about you. 4. "If you are not mine, I will turn your life into hell." Now they will pull out the heavy artillery. Scandals, harassment, physical violence, shame in front of everyone you care about. They are so crazy that they will try to take your children, even though they have no idea how to take care of them. Just to hurt you. They will try to take the apartment, even if they have 10 apartments. They will do anything to crush you. With the argument "because that's what I want". They will show their true face to the unscrupulous. Stay on top of things all the time. All the while, remember that he feeds on your emotions. If you show him that you are afraid, he will like it and will continue. Do not hesitate to call the police, ask for a restraining order if you feel in danger. It will all end when you show that he can't hurt you anymore. In the meantime, he cannot sit without adoration, without supplies of greatness, and must be already processing a new sacrifice. Some humble woman who is ready to heal the poor, wounded, harassed little man. Wish them luck and move on. He can't go on, he will never pity you. He will always be interested in you, he will always hope that he still has power, that he can still make you smile, or if not, at least that he can cause you discomfort. In fact, this is your greatest victory, your retribution. You will become a strong, confident and happy woman, you will vaguely remember him, and he will live with the memory of you, with the failure of his project. He will stand on the balcony with a distracted look while his new wife licks the house and serves dinner and fantasizes about you. How you call him and tell him that you still think about him, that you still love him, he will secretly hope that you are alone and unhappy without him. Then he would come in, sit at the table, and say, "My ex was making great salads," to push the new victim to do more. he will secretly hope that you are alone and unhappy without him. Then he would come in, sit at the table, and say, "My ex was making great salads," to push the new victim to do more. he will secretly hope that you are alone and unhappy without him. Then he would come in, sit at the table, and say, "My ex made great salads," to push the new victim to do more.

   From number 5 12, 20, 23 Yes, that's how the whole odyssey went. It is difficult, but not impossible. Everything he said is completely true, I have lived and such a person for years, I'm not sure who put an end to it. Take action, girls! You will succeed.

   The author. I want to ask someone who has had such a relationship to tell me how things went in order to come to a separation. Oh, and also how you took it in the end. She and he in general. I will be very interested. For example, such a man accepts separation. He doesn't care much or suffers from the fact that, for example, he has emaciated the "dream woman". I will give an example. I am the woman ... I do my best for the relationship, I take care of my husband, I am faithful to him, I love him very much, I pamper him from time to time and I support him in all his endeavors and desires. He is lazy, has high expectations of the woman next to him, commanders and does not respect her wishes or opinions. He is "always" right and no one can tell him anything. Can this kind of man change?

   From Number 12 Number 14/21 I myself did not have a relationship after the separation, more than a year ago. That's why I haven't written anything about a new man in my life. I don't feel ready, I don't have the need. From the age of 16 to 30, I had not been left alone for more than a month. I had an affair with a drug addict, a psychopath who was stalking me, and in the end I almost married a sociopath. Their difference from narcissists is that they are not vain, they do not observe the norms of society, but they want to accept them as they are. Anyway. After the separation, I lost both my partner and my identity. I had no idea how to live without demands on me. My playlist was made up of favorite songs of my father and the men I was with. I had never had a hobby or anything like that. I saw no point in cooking, or being beautiful, or playing sports just for myself. This with self-love, I didn't understand it at all. I thought, why should I love myself, what have I achieved? I could still hear in my head, "You're super stopped and hopeless, you don't have a normal friend." And again I literally gritted my teeth and sweated so I wouldn't call him. Sometimes I couldn't stand it and got in the car, went to a field to scream. I thought it was better to hit me every day than to be alone. Everything seemed difficult and complicated to me, I didn't want to start anything new. I come from a super demanding family, but instead of becoming ambitious, I developed a fear of failure. I'd rather not start new things than risk not doing well. I even took the book secretly so that no one would know if I was torn. I realized that my codependence was an escape from myself. I started going to a psychologist and I'm still going. We are working on my problem with procrastination and my confidence. I try to gather experience without being interested in the result. To distinguish doing good from sacrifice. And things like that. My psychologist connected me with a wonderful woman Milena Goleva, who runs a yoga class in the city. She makes super good live couch videos in Bulgarian and "Academy for Happiness" seminars. I started going regularly, I met impressive women. Women who seemed to direct their need to care productively throughout their careers and were cared for and valued at home. They were happy with themselves. I set myself a mission to fall in love with myself first and enrolled in child psychology. Life and health September I will be lecturing. Besides, I read a lot about these people. There are millions of videos on YouTube on this topic, and there is a documentary in English. I have a living example of my parents, of his too. These people do not change. I have read in many places that they do not even experience emotions, but imitate them. That they are not capable of empathy and love. That was very shocking to me. That they are pathological liars and women. That they would cheat at every opportunity, they experience perverse pleasure and a great deal of greatness from doing immoral things and getting away with it. They are dangerous for everyone around them because they do not have a real risk assessment. They really believe that they can't crash or that something bad happens to them. Due to the lack of empathy, they cannot learn from experience and mistakes. My ex-husband hit the car every month and always claimed that someone else was to blame. He still believes that he is an amazing driver and does not follow the rules. I mean sociopaths, narcissists follow the rules of society. All these things, you can hear them from psychologists, from survivors, from support groups for codependents, if you know a little English, look for Narcissistic personality on YouTube. I had the feeling that these psychologists were peeking out the window at us. The worst thing is that people on the spectrum don't want help, they think everyone else is wrong, they don't want to give up greatness, they don't want to change. They do not at all suggest about the rich emotional world of other people. It is a disgrace for them to become like other people. I had love for him too, but it's forgiveness now. After all, they are a product of raising their family, and we, it was not easy for them. But I do not want my life to be a rehabilitation center, I believe that the purpose of the relationship is different. I think I gave up on him completely after I happened to meet his friend, with whom they quarreled super strangely and we stopped seeing each other. When he heard that we had separated, he admitted to me that they had quarreled because my ex had written to his wife. He downloaded it, offered a job. He also told me about a case in which they met in our country while I was on a business trip, my ex called a girl aged 19, 20. Everyone else slept at home, and in the morning, he made the girl clean the apartment. I still remember how clean it was when I got home and how he lied to me that he made sure we had free time to see each other before the work week. I've been in a big movie, I thought we were happy, at least in those first years. When I got home, I decided to call him and tell him what I understood. I thought for half an hour what to tell him, and finally I gave up. I think I was free then, I didn't care. I thought, why call, get upset, either, whatever. The psychologist praised me for hearing me for the first time conscious and self-choosing.

   From Number 12 to the Author Yes, that's how it works. After the love bombing, they relax. They can't keep the mask on for long. They have a lot of friends, but they rarely see them, they take turns and thus keep their good name in society. However, you are there constantly, you haven't been out without him for a long time, you're bored, you prefer his company. He already feels in control and is looking for different sources of a dose of greatness. For example, he often starts dating only friends. In general, he prefers to spend time with other people. You start to wonder if you're trying hard enough to keep his interest, if you can't do more. Red light - when I overlook it, I get more good treatment. Because instead of saying the situation is unacceptable or leaving, you try to be so good, to win the battle with his friends for his attention. Hypothetically, they may not be friends, they may be completely devoted to their work, to their addiction, to some hobby. And so he understands that there are no bad consequences for unacceptable behavior, and this escalates over time. He begins to think about what I wrote in my first comment. "A normal person would not tolerate such an attitude of my wife and there is something, she has no dignity, she has nothing but me, how to respect such a person" and begins to insult you that you are obsessive, boring, that you have no friends, that you are too sensitive, crazy, all the weaknesses you have found, every complex. And he's good at it. And you stay again. He makes up a pseudo-excuse "I've had a lot of problems lately," "you challenged me," he says. that he doesn't think these things and you accept that too. As I said, these insults are a copy of your inner critical monologue (not your essence) and it hits your self-esteem to the ground. The person closest to you, the person who knows you best, has a disgusting opinion of you. He almost compromises with himself, does you a favor by being with you. Jealousy is acknowledging the superiority of the other. He likes to be jealous and compare you to someone else. The worst thing, in my opinion, is that this jealousy is often justified, but they so cleverly hide their tracks (they can also lie a lie detector) and enchant "why should I do it, I have the most beautiful woman, the most -the incredible mistress ... "that more or less you stop believing in your inner voice, in your intuition and you become even easier to manipulate. " It becomes unhappy with time "people on the spectrum are characterized by ups and downs. They fall into a state of complete apathy at some point. You still feel guilty that you can not fix the mood and blame yourself for not being a good partner, but this condition has nothing to do with you, but your reaction to it teaches him a new trick of “punishment by silence.” And he already knows that it is enough to ignore you to start circling around him with questions “what are you well, are you angry, has something happened, have I done something, do you want to eat, what are you ... "And yet you reward unacceptable behavior. I don't think that an unhappy love, however, can be a cause of personality disorder." The reason for the development of personality disorder, including narcissistic, is not clear. As with others, Even with this species, it is believed that the problem lies in childhood - excessive concern, high demands of parents. However, more and more psychiatrists are emphasizing the lack of necessary attention and love, abuse, a bad example to follow in childhood. Other theories rely on a genetic component or changes at the biochemical level. "The whole article: https: // www. Puls. Bg / zdrav-um-c-31 / nartsisizmt-razstroistvo-na-lichnostta-n-3397 Download the book I wrote, there are many stories in it about such connections. I I have already said what I think is the surest way to find out if you are with a person who loves you or you are with a person who loves control over you.A person who loves you will not sabotage you to develop your personality, will not mind you to study, to play sports, to have time for friends, to practice some personal hobby. The person who loves not you, but the control over you, will sabotage you in everything that takes his attention away from him. He does not want you to have self-confidence and to be complete and independent, because he will not be able to control you. Then "you can't do without me" will sound absurd. So, just focus on yourself, think about what you have overlooked, friends, work, family. Think about what life you missed before the relationship, what made you happy, gave you energy, what made you enthusiastic and come back to these things, to yourself. Work on your independence, your financial independence, so that you always have a choice. This is a direction you will not go wrong, no matter what partner you are with. Dependence has another side, namely, escape from oneself - when the woman does not want to develop her personality and hides in a relationship that sucks her out and justifies herself even to herself that she does not want to be responsible for her life. However, leaving the responsibility for one's life in the hands of another, especially a person on the spectrum, is the biggest mistake one can make and the surest way to always be dissatisfied. Success!

   I am number 1 and 15. There is something true in what one of the commenters said - such people feed on your attention and only expect you to give it to them, albeit indirectly - whether through a publication or a song. Whatever it was. This commenter had mentioned that such people still "hover" around us. And I already understand it from experience. My ex-boyfriend, who I was talking about here, had the courage yesterday to contact my very close friend to ask her about me, he even made her ask me what our separation was like, how I felt. Higher form of impudence. He told her how he never liked me mentally or mentally, but I just looked "his type." In general ... he commented on me steadily, and all the time (as a good friend) she answered briefly and hinted to him several times, that I hadn't even discussed anything about him in front of her. In the end, she just fucked him, as they say. Quite a pitiful act; he ended up saying that he was sure that everything he said would be passed on to me, and he expected me to call him. Do you know what I did? It's been 24 hours since this case. I picked up my phone, opened my notes, and wrote a long, long novel about everything I thought he was. Any bad quality and disgusting behavior. I wonder if I should send it to him, but I know that's what he expects - a reaction. And ... as we know, there are three good reactions - joke, empathy or none at all. I will try to restrain myself. You think this is the right step, right? that he was sure that everything he said would be passed on to me, and he expected me to call him. Do you know what I did? It's been 24 hours since this case. I picked up my phone, opened my notes, and wrote a long, long novel about everything I thought he was. Any bad quality and disgusting behavior. I wonder if I should send it to him, but I know that's what he expects - a reaction. And ... as we know, there are three good reactions - joke, empathy or none at all. I will try to restrain myself. You think this is the right step, right? that he was sure that everything he said would be passed on to me, and he expected me to call him. Do you know what I did? It's been 24 hours since this case. I picked up my phone, opened my notes, and wrote a long, long novel about everything I thought he was. Any bad quality and disgusting behavior. I wonder if I should send it to him, but I know that's what he expects - a reaction. And ... as we know, there are three good reactions - joke, empathy or none at all. I will try to restrain myself. You think this is the right step, right? Any bad quality and disgusting behavior. I wonder if I should send it to him, but I know that's what he expects - a reaction. And ... as we know, there are three good reactions - joke, empathy or none at all. I will try to restrain myself. You think this is the right step, right? Any bad quality and disgusting behavior. I wonder if I should send it to him, but I know that's what he expects - a reaction. And ... as we know, there are three good reactions - joke, empathy or none at all. I will try to restrain myself. You think this is the right step, right?

   Number 12 You've put so much time and energy into it. He loves attention, even if it is negative. They are most annoyed by indifference, if that's your idea. You must be wondering why you don't call like that, aren't you naughty that you don't like something. His opinion should be super important to you. He tries what happens to the control. Even if you persevere, I think he will call you these days, he will behave as if he has amnesia, he will pretend to be funny, if you do not give in, insults and accusations will start. I would spare myself this conversation.

   5 I am He and my individual threatened to burn down my house. He called a friend - the same. Some insults and attacks started, of course. He told her to tell me not to look for him anymore and not to think about him at all. I thought of writing him something biting in response, but I stopped - I'm still aiming for salvation, because I've been in this circle for years. I delicately interfere in the discussion, but it is anonymous. I deal with the situation more or less on my own and it weighs on me sometimes.

   Don't worry, comrades, very soon the MACHINES will take over from us. You will not have to love yourself or have children. Even if you can erase yourself - even better for them. So have fun - eat, drink and pound as if for the last time (or smoke, get drunk - who cares) as if for the last time! Because it really will be. Artificial intelligence is the latest invention of mankind. Amen!

   Up to 31 Who? Abe to her! Enough talking nonsense .. I have robots and we have fun and there is no bachkontieme like idiots all day ...

   I will suggest a little about sex with another man. The stage must have passed with the thought of whether to call the former. You have to focus on yourself. Just masturbate and imagine that you are with another man, preferably with an actor. Let your mind accept the idea that the former is not irreplaceable. After a while, for everyone differently, you will mentally adjust to sex with another.

   Number 12 to 5 If you don't know the nature of these people, they look completely unpredictable. This happens because their actions are inadequate and illogical and this confuses any normal person. But once you understand their mechanism of thinking, you see that they are absolutely predictable and constantly repeat the same patterns. Bombardment with love, devaluation, separation and then again, bombardment with love, devaluation, separation ... They can do this all their lives, there are such marriages of 30, 40 years and women who all their lives feel wrong, because no matter how to change to please, the pattern never changes. He does not need to change, because this way the man receives the maximum care and attention from the woman, and at the same time he has a double life with impunity. You will say that this man is very lucky, but no. He is constantly dissatisfied and demanding, starving for more and more stimuli. His nature never allows him to be content and happy. The wife of such a man is like a hamster in a wheel, whatever he does is in the same situation. This can drive any woman crazy and make her think she is inferior and never dare to break the model and leave. The options to leave you alone are indifference and a new relationship. If you fall into a new relationship with a stable, normal person, he capitulates (as long as you do not look for him). He is fully aware that everyone else is capable of giving you more, and that he is doomed in such a race. This can drive any woman crazy and make her think she is inferior and never dare to break the model and leave. The options to leave you alone are indifference and a new relationship. If you fall into a new relationship with a stable, normal person, he capitulates (as long as you do not look for him). He is fully aware that everyone else is capable of giving you more, and that he is doomed in such a race. This can drive any woman crazy and make her think she is inferior and never dare to break the model and leave. The options to leave you alone are indifference and a new relationship. If you fall into a new relationship with a stable, normal person, he capitulates (as long as you do not look for him). He is fully aware that everyone else is capable of giving you more, and that he is doomed in such a race.

   5 to 12 I hope so, really. Mine in particular is quite aggressive and throws itself into combat. I hope that time will wash everything away and sooner or later everything will return to normal. I will not hide that I am afraid of not seeing him on the streets. I really hope to get out of this city, nothing that the city is big. Thank you for the advice otherwise. I keep thinking about unblocking him to see what he's doing, but then I stop, for good.

   I also get involved in the topic to follow the opinions, because there are quite good ones and they help me a lot to understand the psychology of the narcissist. Here is my story with such an individual: I have been in a circle of "I love you", ignored and silent for 5 years. He is an absolute womanizer and maintains several parallel relationships. At first he behaved absolutely vulgarly, constantly throwing sexual innuendos at me. That's how he treated all the other women around me. However, I quite hate this attitude and I showed it to him many times. Gradually, he changed his tactics and began to respect and appreciate me. His attitude towards me changed for the better, and he continued to behave vulgarly towards the others. He started calling and writing to me often, making me various small romantic gestures and gifts. He started writing to me every morning for good morning. Find out as soon as he wakes up at 5:00, 6:00. And he slept with me in the evening. He kept me on the phone until 4:00 and in the morning again talking, writing and so on all day, every day. Then I felt special and decided he was in love with me. He was obsessed with me. He himself told me that he could barely last an hour without hearing me. He started sharing personal things with me. I began to live with his pains and joys. He was worried about me too. He immediately sensed when I was unhappy and in a bad mood. Then he showed concern, because he immediately called me and reassured me. To tell you the truth, he could do it. So I gradually fell in love with him. I didn't know then that I was addicted, because whenever I got angry, he begged me to come back to him, because he needed me and he couldn't do without me. Then I thought it was passion and falling in love with him, in fact, it turned out to be a simple love bombing. It gave me the feeling that I was in control and everything depended on me. It made me feel unique, wanted, sexy, passionate. Increase my self-esteem to a level I have never possessed. Gradually I became addicted to his attention, and if he didn't write or call me, then I literally couldn't breathe. I began to ask what was wrong with him and why he was reducing his contact with me. So he realized that I was already addicted to him and my nightmare began. Gradually, the calls decreased, and for a year now they have completely disappeared. SMS also decreased. The morning one, however, remained, but it was much later. The evening was completely dropped. Even days go by without me writing. I started making scandals, being jealous, becoming obsessive. I was leaving, I was coming back, I was good, understanding, I was leaving again, I apologized again for things I was not guilty of and kept coming back. This has been going on for two years now. He completely lost respect for me. Whereas before he trembled not to leave him and walked unhappily like at a funeral, now he only tells me you are crazy, do whatever you want. He doesn't care anymore when he leaves and he's not looking for me. I last a maximum of a month and I look for him again with another apology. He started looking for me only for sex. He is addicted to sex. I began to refuse him sex more and more politely, always giving good reasons so as not to hurt his male self-esteem. Well, then he started manipulating me in silence. After he refused, he stopped talking to me for weeks. At one point he calls. He says a few kind words and again directly seeks sex. It's insulting to me and I tell him I need an emotional connection, to have sex with someone, but he declares me crazy again and again the next silent and so on for several months. You know how I feel. The person I love more than myself no longer even wants to share with me. I don't feel close to him anymore, and I miss his kind and caring attitude so much. I feel just like a drug addict asking for another dose of love and attention. I do my best to get it back the way it was. I am subjected to all kinds of humiliations, I forgive the unforgivable, and he moves further and further away. I can't know each other anymore. I, who have always managed to set boundaries where necessary, have hit rock bottom at the moment and I can't get out, although I am fully aware of the whole situation I am in and I can't stop. When we fight, I even feel physical pain. I realize how much this person hurts me and that he doesn't love me, but a few days have passed since the separation and new hopes begin to creep into me that he can still love me and I go with new methods and again more understanding and loving than ever and again everything collapses and I am again left with pain and absence. For splendor, he started taking down my girlfriends as well. Now he writes and sounds crazy to them, just like he did to me, and this, instead of disgusting me, makes me even more ambitious to get it back. I wait patiently for him to get bored, but he is quite persistent and does not give up for years. He haunted me for two years. I am in a JSC, in which I got myself and from which I have to get out on my own, and I do not find strength. I hated myself. I don't respect myself anymore. My self-esteem is zero. I want to run away and never come back, because otherwise I can't give up on this man. I am currently blocking him for the first time because after my next refusal to have sex, he curses me. He had never allowed himself to offend me before. I thought he would regret his behavior and apologize to me because he happened to apologize to me, but instead, he started writing and calling my friends with all his might, making them laugh and explaining how much they were. beautiful. And I'm in pain again. I think about him all the time and I miss the way he made me feel, our conversations, his jokes, and the passion we had. Only he unlocked in me a passion I didn't think I had. He gave me emotions that I have never experienced with any other man. I love him and I want him the way he was, but unfortunately he will never be the same again, because he already owns me and I'm not interested in him. He already shares with everyone else, but not with me, who until recently was close to him, and he still knows the others. It also hurts that I realize this is the end and he will never look for me again. Squeeze my thumbs this time to experience my abstinence and not be tempted to look for it anymore.

   Well, you realized things yourself. Even if you give in again, nothing will change. Such a relationship can only be harmful to you, because your diligence will not be appreciated and you will enter the film, "if I am the perfect partner I will deserve it to change for me", but with these people it never happens and just you will further root the belief that you are not good enough. You can't trust such a person, he doesn't think well of you and he doesn't care about your happiness. In connection with such a person, you not only tirelessly take care of his happiness (which is unattainable - he is never satisfied and satisfied), but you also have to take care of your own ... if there is time left, if you have the strength. But from my observations this does not happen. These people drink you so much that at one point you totally deny your needs. On the other hand, if you fail, you will be cured little by little of your emotional addiction every day. I promise you that one day you will wonder to yourself how you could put so much energy into this person. There is one key approach to addictions, and that is to accept that there will be a period of grief. To understand that there is no short way and way to miss the period - to swim skillfully and confidently through it without resisting it. Just accept that it is part of the healing. Make yourself your best friend. What would you do for your friend if he suffered in such a situation? Would you take him for a walk, would you play him a funny movie, what would you advise him? Try to look at the situation from the side of a bystander who thinks best of you. Greetings Number 12 I promise you that one day you will wonder to yourself how you could put so much energy into this person. There is one key approach to addictions, and that is to accept that there will be a period of grief. To understand that there is no short way and way to miss the period - to swim skillfully and confidently through it without resisting it. Just accept that it is part of the healing. Make yourself your best friend. What would you do for your friend if he suffered in such a situation? Would you take him for a walk, would you play him a funny movie, what would you advise him? Try to look at the situation from the side of a bystander who thinks best of you. Greetings Number 12 I promise you that one day you will wonder to yourself how you could put so much energy into this person. There is one key approach to addictions, and that is to accept that there will be a period of grief. To understand that there is no short way and way to miss the period - to swim skillfully and confidently through it without resisting it. Just accept that it is part of the healing. Make yourself your best friend. What would you do for your friend if he suffered in such a situation? Would you take him for a walk, would you play him a funny movie, what would you advise him? Try to look at the situation from the side of a bystander who thinks best of you. Greetings Number 12 To understand that there is no short way and way to miss the period - to swim skillfully and confidently through it without resisting it. Just accept that it is part of the healing. Make yourself your best friend. What would you do for your friend if he suffered in such a situation? Would you take him for a walk, would you play him a funny movie, what would you advise him? Try to look at the situation from the side of a bystander who thinks best of you. Greetings Number 12 To understand that there is no short way and way to miss the period - to swim skillfully and confidently through it without resisting it. Just accept that it is part of the healing. Make yourself your best friend. What would you do for your friend if he suffered in such a situation? Would you take him for a walk, would you play him a funny movie, what would you advise him? Try to look at the situation from the side of a bystander who thinks best of you. Greetings Number 12 what would you advise him? Try to look at the situation from the side of a bystander who thinks best of you. Greetings Number 12 what would you advise him? Try to look at the situation from the side of a bystander who thinks best of you. Greetings Number 12