Hello, First I want to emphasize that I do not care who is wrong and who is right here, but just how much you would be offended. Therefore, I will try to describe the incident in as neutral a way as possible. A young family with a small child living abroad invites X (a very close relative living in Bulgaria) to visit for the second time (the first time was a few years ago, before even thinking of a child ) for a stay of several weeks in their home. This invitation has been valid for a long time, but for one reason or another it is only "now". The family pays for the plane ticket and all the expenses in general and organizes an additional trip to an interesting city with a short stay there of 2-3 days. But X doesn't seem to care about the city at all. He doesn't look at the buildings, or the interesting objects on the road, or even take pictures. Quite frequent stops are required during the tour for X to go to the toilet for a small need. However, on the morning of the second day, X announced that he had a muscle fever and frayed thighs from the previous day and would therefore be staying at the hotel. The family just walks around the city (because of the child). This complete lack of interest continues after returning from the city in question. The family provided X with a SIM card, which turned out to be incompatible, but also a paper map of the city, as well as a prepaid card for public transport. The family goes to work, takes the child to kindergarten, returns and sees X sitting in their home and clicking on the computer. He doesn't go out to see what has changed over the years, he doesn't even walk around the new neighborhood where the family lives. And so every day. This gives rise to jokes - that X is behaving antisocially, not to do something. Everything in the circle of the joke. A few days later, during a walk in a nice neighborhood on Saturday, X started posting scathing comments about the walk. And here a dispute arises. When asked why he doesn't come out, X answers that he is worried that he will get lost. There was no roaming, and since X's phone didn't recognize the SIM card, he couldn't call if something happened, and without a cell phone he couldn't find his way around. The family does not accept the argument. However, X has come here before and then there were no such fears. X replies that a lot of time has passed since then and that people change over time. Arguing that he could just use a paper card (as he had the previous time), X shrugs and says that times are different, and that the last time he at least had a phone to keep in touch with. if something happens. He also says that he toured the city for the first time. X came here to see both the family and their child. It's one thing on Skype, it's quite another face to face. The family is not left with such an impression, however, and is of the opinion that X is lying to them, that he came by force and that he has delayed his arrival so many times on purpose, because he is simply not interested in them. X replies that is not the case, but does not know what he can tell them to convince them otherwise. He / she then asks why they have not come to Bulgaria to see relatives for so many years. The family replies that it's because of work - they work a lot, and besides, they can't travel such long distances due to health reasons that are too personal to share. X responds immediately, that he / she also had health problems and therefore did not want to walk. However, X continues and asks why we hear and see each other on Skype so rarely and for such a short time. The reason is that a child is still being raised, that Skype conversations still sometimes get cold, including for the child, especially on weekends when the family wants to take a break from the work week. And, as normal as it is for grandparents and other relatives to enjoy the grandchild, the line must be drawn at some point. This is not a reality show. "Ah, I don't believe you!" Lie to me - X answers - you are just making excuses. In fact, you don't care about us and you want to beat the numbers! With that, the walk was abruptly stopped and everyone returned, despite the child's protests. X tried to apologize. At the next Skype conversation with grandparents, X was demonstratively handed the phone - to juggle between conversations, to play with the child and in the meantime to maintain the focus of the camera. More apologies followed. * * * So here I ask the following questions - if you were on the side of the family, how much would you be offended What do you think of X? If the above had happened to you, how would it have affected your future relationship with X?
Answers 30
If we were in the family place, we would LEAVE X to do what he wants and not try too hard to make X's vacation (women obviously don't "rub their feet") interesting by OUR standards! If HER likes to stay at home, what do you care that you have reached accusations and demands explanations, now there should be offended people! Hmm ....
Conclusions based on what is described: X obviously does not feel well on the spot. Maybe he really has health problems after getting tired so fast and needs a break. It is not necessary to search under the ox calf. It is also obvious that he did not come to be a tourist, so the second reason remains - he still came to see you and spend time with you. We also live abroad and it seems absurd to me to send a close relative who has come / visited for the first time in many years, armed only with a paper card and without a phone to walk around the city. Anything can happen and for me it is complete nonsense. It is normal for a person not to want to go around alone - when a person is younger he can take risks without thinking, but with age this really changes. I understand that the family works during the week and there is no way for someone to stick as a postage stamp for X during his / her stay, but also I would not feel good in a similar situation, in a foreign country, to walk around the city alone with a paper card - you don't specify how much X speaks the local language ... When relatives come to us, I also want to show as much as possible in the shortest possible time - and in my enthusiasm I find several times that without realizing the program I have exhausted them. max and really had to include more time for rest and recovery or fewer objects or just drive it more relaxed. Postponing the invitation - if the road is really long, it is quite normal for no one to jump out of desire - this does not mean that he does not love you or he / she does not care about you. It's not pleasant to travel far alone, especially if you are not used to it and it does not happen to you often. This is stress. After a certain age, a person starts to be disturbed and bothered / frightened by many things that he may not have noticed at all before - and this is quite normal. The family seems disappointed because there were very specific expectations and plans for how things should go. From his point of view, it seems that he has made every effort to organize and plan a wonderful stay - but the guest does not fit into the role you have assigned to him. I do not see a real reason for insult here - just poor communication and divergence of expectations. The family wanted everything to go perfectly according to his ideas of perfect guests :) I think they ignored the human factor: ) It is quite possible that X has a completely different idea of perfect guests and this is also normal and not a cause for insult. Drive a little calmer For the above reasons, if I were in the place of the family I would not be offended - I will feel like my efforts are underestimated and I will not be happy, but I can put myself in the place of the other side and find out and her. It is also normal for many misunderstandings to arise or for the information to be interpreted differently on both sides when communication is limited to Skype only. To the second question: If the above had happened to you, how would it have affected your future relationship with X? I will look for direct communication - I will explain to X that we do not understand what is happening, because we put a lot of effort and we just wanted him / her to have fun and be happy with his / her stay and we are sick when we see that X is not feeling well and this is not happening. I will ask X directly what is being done to him / her during the rest of his / her stay while he / she is here and what is not, and I will ask him / her to say things openly and not expect us to think or consider things that X can understand on its own. you are, but not for us. In the future I will not press X with invitations or give ultimatums such as that if he loves us, he will come more often - let him know that there is an opportunity and if he wants we will cooperate with the organization, but to show initiative if he wants . I will ask X directly what is being done to him / her during the rest of his / her stay while he / she is here and what is not, and I will ask him / her to say things openly and not expect us to think or consider things that X can understand on its own. you are, but not for us. In the future I will not press X with invitations or give ultimatums such as that if he loves us, he will come more often - let him know that there is an opportunity and if he wants we will cooperate with the organization, but to show initiative if he wants . I will ask X directly what is being done to him / her during the rest of his / her stay while he / she is here and what is not, and I will ask him / her to say things openly and not to expect us to think or consider things that X can understand by itself. you are, but not for us. In the future I will not press X with invitations or give ultimatums such as that if he loves us, he will come more often - let him know that there is an opportunity and if he wants we will cooperate with the organization, but to show initiative if he wants .
Well, I don't know exactly how close the character X is to you, I guess he's a brother / sister of someone in the family, but it's a personal matter. I think the words themselves are offensive given the gesture you made for him / her. He could have kept his opinion. This is your life. But this with the organization of an "excursion" is a bit exaggerated, honestly. Not all people like to look around and walk all day. Sometimes you go somewhere just to see other people who are important to you. You don't have to pretend to be a tour guide because not everyone likes that. For example, I like vacations, not excursions, especially historical ones are very boring for me ... Next time don't do such things. And instead of getting angry, talk to X, why did he say the harsh words? He may have a problem with you and not say it, communication is important. You are not small children after all ... I would do so. Julian
I still didn't understand why this family should be insulted by X ... I didn't read that a personal insult was made ... The fact that X doesn't come out and that it costs you an insult is also your problem. Not all people like to mumble in the streets. This family, to me personally, seems very subtle. So you think that X ... is lying and that he doesn't really care about you ... and that must be true, because you think so. And that X. also thinks about you in this way is not true because X ... thinks it ... eeeee, what is the conclusion ...
Do I know? X is a grandmother and an aunt, an old girl, at least 70 years old, who lives with the idea that the whole world revolves around her and her needs and desires and can't even understand how the family in question can't travel to Bulgaria 2-3 times a year to see her and from where to where she does not spend the whole weekend in front of the camera on Skype so that she can learn in great detail absolutely everything about their lives. Well, honestly, I would be a little offended, but I'd rather feel sorry for her that she can't even understand how dynamic the life of a young family with a child can be and how most people are not like her and don't have all the time. the world for gossip on skype. Well, you know her best, but in a situation like that, I wouldn't take offense, rather, I would try to show her what my daily life is like with all the work there, child care, housekeeping, etc. It's just that most retirees have long since forgotten what it's like to work full time, to raise a child. and to keep your home clean and think that we are like them and have all the time in the world for gossip, drinking coffee, watching soaps, etc. and when after all this madness, finally on Sunday you have some free time left in the afternoon, but you want to dedicate it to yourself and your family, and not to a Skype discussion on an 1111 million episode of a Turkish soap or to what problems your downstairs neighbor had with her daughter-in-law (and you don't you know neither the neighbor nor her daughter-in-law!). So he just can't understand you. It's just that most retirees have long since forgotten what it's like to work full time, raise a child and keep your home clean, and they think we're just like them and have all the time in the world for gossiping, drinking coffee, watching soaps, etc., and when, after all this madness, you finally have some free time left on Sunday afternoon, you want to dedicate it to yourself and your family, and not to a Skype discussion on an 1111 million episode of a Turkish soap or what problems the downstairs neighbor had with her daughter-in-law (and you don't know either the neighbor or her daughter-in-law!). So he just can't understand you. It's just that most retirees have long since forgotten what it's like to work full time, raise a child and keep your home clean, and they think we're just like them and have all the time in the world for gossiping, drinking coffee, watching soaps, etc., and when, after all this madness, you finally have some free time left on Sunday afternoon, you want to dedicate it to yourself and your family, and not to a Skype discussion on an 1111 million episode of a Turkish soap or what problems the downstairs neighbor had with her daughter-in-law (and you don't know either the neighbor or her daughter-in-law!). So he just can't understand you. watching soaps, etc., and when, after all this madness, you finally have some free time left on Sunday afternoon, well, you want to dedicate it to yourself and your family, not to a Skype discussion of an 1111 million episode of some Turkish soap or what problems the downstairs neighbor had with her daughter-in-law (and you don't know either the neighbor or her daughter-in-law!). So he just can't understand you. watching soaps, etc., and when, after all this madness, you finally have some free time left on Sunday afternoon, well, you want to dedicate it to yourself and your family, not to a Skype discussion of an 1111 million episode of some Turkish soap or what problems the downstairs neighbor had with her daughter-in-law (and you don't know either the neighbor or her daughter-in-law!). So he just can't understand you.
Skype conversations ... abe yaaaa ... until recently people were satisfied with one card 2 times a year .. My opinion is that X is a total depressant. In my opinion, it is your own fault that you did not judge the character of X and took the trouble to deal with him / her. You have invested your money, time and energy for 'the one who blows'.
I had a headache until I read it, and I don't know who would be offended. Speak like adults, not like 2 year olds!
X is offended. We do not know the rest of everyday life to know whether it is justified or not. You do not accept his explanations, but you turn against him when he explains. Without details about the relationship, contacts and kinship / friendship with X outside the holiday, there is no way to give an objective opinion. woman
X is rubbish. That defines it, that's what exhausts it. The insult is there, but it is not so great. I wouldn't bother to keep in touch.
I will also answer the questions. There is nothing to offend, just the family did not choose the right gift-trip, if they wanted to please the guest they had to inquire in advance about her tastes. I think X is about 60 years old woman, who did not come on an excursion, but to see the child-relative, that the family has wishes for walks in an interesting city FOR THEM and have dragged the guest, X is not to blame. The family are young and busy people, they want to go for walks, but why do they expect the old woman to be as happy as they are for walks? Why and how do they want to compare their young strengths and youthful desires with those of an adult? Why do they think that it is possible for a person to walk the streets of a foreign country without knowing the language, it would be uncomfortable, of course? Maybe if she's accompanied by a young man, to have someone to talk to, someone to ask if she doesn't understand something, but hardly on her own. Maybe the family will realize this if one of them ever goes far alone on a trip without a phone. And looking at buildings is not interesting for everyone and there are many people who do not like to take a lot of pictures, especially people born before 1970. As for the comparison of health reasons, there is no way to compare, we do not know the diseases, although it is clear to everyone that age is an acceptable excuse for refusing to travel abroad. I decided that X was a woman, because only a woman would complain of rubbed hips, only a woman would often go to the toilet on a small need while moving / male prostatitis causes problems at night /. When asked about future relationships, they shouldn't change, I didn't see X sinning, who knows how many. Yes, it's a little awkward to say that someone doesn't care about her, but so much. Only one thing I did not understand Why, according to family X, she came to them abroad, if she does not want to walk and see cities, if according to them she did not come to see them and the child, then why did X travel so much ??? Usually when someone travels 2000-3000 thousand kilometers there is a goal, what was the goal of X?
The family should not be impressed by X and should accept calmly that all people get old with age and their behavior becomes delusional in some direction. everyone kills him somewhere. I judge by our grandmothers, aunts, great-grandmothers, and a little by men. There is no point in insulting the family and there is no point in explaining - from one moment on they still know their own. so it is sent live healthier and yet some rarer contact with x is maintained. rarely but regularly :)
H 1, I support your comment, but ... I am a woman and I assure you that my legs do not rub :) you are very funny with "women like that, men otherwise". Many women have a much greater capacity (and physical) than men and I think it's time for you to notice it ...
I would not be offended. People of all kinds, we called X to come see us, what X will do during the day does not affect us much. X is an adult who can decide for himself. Over the years, people change, become more anxious and understand that in many situations it will be difficult to cope alone in a foreign place. I was abroad 2 years ago, I don't think I can handle the coordination in this place at the moment, if someone puts me there by accident. I remember the main arteries, but if I get lost, even if it seems familiar, it will be difficult to cope. I imagine it was 10, not 2 years and I had no connection with acquaintances. X obviously didn't intend to act like he was on a trip, why should I be angry? I would be angry with us for taking X into account, but we are not returning home to take the child to the whole family,
For X I can't draw general conclusions, but for the family I can definitely say that it is annoying and passively aggressive.
First, the difference in mentality, understandings is already a fact. Second X reminds me of a treasury that I click around the clock on Facebook and because it is very limited, I barely went abroad once, but I would behave in the same way. The other thing is that Bulgarians, whether you are polite or not, force and impose an opinion. You don't have to come, they think that by leading someone to see more things he is happy. Yes, but it is not obvious. It is also said short visits long friendships.
I like how when the family says something it's a joke, and when X says something it's teasing; when the family feels neglected it is justified, and when X feels neglected it is because he wants too much. The family is not in a position to take offense in my opinion. What is this fashion for every second to pretend to be interesting and use "antisocial" without even knowing the meaning of the word?
If anyone needs to be offended by this whole situation, it's person X. I can't believe the "arguments" the family is making. After all, after you have invited your guest, this guest has HIS views on how to spend his vacation, not YOU planting your own and then getting angry that he is not in your opinion. It's like - come and visit us, and then - when you're our guest, you'll do what we tell you. We don't, thank you!
We are a young family abroad - we would not be offended, what X is doing is his job, why are you forcing him and taking him into account? You have made an effort to make your stay interesting, but everyone has different interests. Not everyone lasts a long time either, especially if he is an adult. X comes from another environment, alone, probably does not speak the language, health problems, foreign country / house, no phone - what do you want from the person? The mentality and life in Bulgaria are different from abroad. Stop with expectations and let X feel comfortable and relaxed. Don't take things personally. No one has the right to be angry with you for not going to Bulgaria, etc. But you have overworked, overdone, complete control and as a result of this disappointment.
I understood one thing for sure and that is that this site includes a lot of X-owls.
Yep, families like yours are obviously considered to be very "successful" living abroad, in new nice neighborhoods, and they imagine that all their relatives and friends "from the western BeGe" will break their legs to visit them, to find out how much they have achieved in life and in general all such things of the sort. On the other hand, when they return to the BeGe in the summer to fix their teeth "thinner", they think that everyone should give up their work, vacations, etc., and run to see each other. them, as you can see - they were here only for 2-3 days, at most a week (because their annual leave is in words and numbers 2 weeks). Not obviously, but OBVIOUSLY the so-called invitation on your part is just a demonstration of how successful and advanced you have been in life, and X has been invited as an audience, to reflect this. Well, your bills are crooked. X doesn't share your criteria for success at all, he has his own life and his own criteria, no matter how primitive and uninteresting it may seem to you. That is exactly why X postponed his second visit indefinitely - because he knew very well what he would have to endure. Come on, the first one was out of curiosity - to see YOU HOW YOU are, where you live. The second was to demonstrate how "advanced" you are - new neighborhoods, children, etc., etc. So instead of taking offense - take to grow up. Life is not limited to foreign countries, new neighborhoods, or children whose whims are tolerated more than the wishes of friends / relatives. And whoever wants to see you abroad and the neighborhoods so much, and for him this is vital, will raise money for a ticket himself,
Your mentality is limited, family X. And the person who has a name will be happy away from you! What are you offended about? That you cannot escape from your guild, such a detailed topic without a real problem is the peasant mentality.
n9, if you have a headache just from such an action, immediately run to the doctor, because you have something serious and most likely you need urgent medical intervention. It is also written merged WHILE, and not 'until as' - fix your spelling, because it is very shameful and ugly grown up person to make spelling mistakes in his native language. Shame on you!
And you dramatize the family a lot. X may not like the trips as much as you do. The world does not revolve around you. Is that how you decided to spend your trip in scandals? Tell her if your grandmother is your mother or your husband. Looking at it, it seems to belong to your husband. What does he think about what happened? And I'm interested in how you say you're tired of talking on Skype, and you're angry that she doesn't care about you. "This invitation has been valid for a long time, but for one reason or another it is only now." I think your problem is in her very presence. Get go to "Litigation". And all grow up. You behave like 5 years old.
Number 14, you're not very smart! Only women are rubbed means that NO man is rubbed (except 400 kg. American de), NOT that ALL women are rubbed! Hey, don't let him see, they don't have the capacity to understand, but they immediately write what they hate! I hate those who didn't understand, but they call !!
From the author: Thank you very much for all the answers (the last one approved is currently 18)! I honestly did not expect to see so many different points of view in so few comments - this can only confirm my opinion that there are no curves and straight lines here, but just a discrepancy in worldview, expectations, and too many ambiguities and vague positions on both sides. Obviously, it really needed more communication. But for some of the ambiguities, I just think I had no choice. I'm still thinking about it, and I'll explain, but a little further. Otherwise, thanks also for the assumptions! The prevailing opinion that I was almost like an old and crazy GRANNY came to me like thunder from a clear sky. Baia startled me and made me think. From this point of view, things seem to fit together - it may have seemed too absurd for a man of that age to think in a GRANDMOTHER way, so they decided he was more or less likely to just lie. I wasn't even bothered to look at things from this side. So ... I'm not from the family, I'm H. :) Maybe I exaggerated by using the word "young" - they are both over 35 years old, but they are not old at all. In fact, they are older than me, but not by much, and I like their child as a niece. I speak the language of the country very well. However, I have not been abroad for many years. My brother / sister and I have NEVER had conflicts, except maybe when we were teenagers, and even then we quarreled over trivial and childish things. I think we are VERY close. I've never had an argument with his partner, and even though we're not that close, at least there is respect from me. Ever since they went abroad, never ... but I've NEVER visited them online, in any way. Maybe they had reason to doubt that as well? That apart from congratulating them on their birthdays, I didn't think of anything else to write to them? But not as if I had ignored them if they had ever looked for me for something. I have always tried to answer them! It reminds me of something else. During my visit I was asked about specific details related to other relatives. These were questions I could not answer. It just so happened - I talked to the people in question, they told me ... but it escaped my head and when the family asked me about these things later, I just didn't remember ... but, what can I do? However, it was not seen as a sign that I was distracted and forgotten, but as "another" piece of evidence, that no one and nothing interests me ... Now, for the ambiguities: to those who know about health problems, congratulations. In this case there are two of them. One of them totally blew me away on the first day, because he attacked me out of nowhere. I had no idea that this could happen ... But ... tell me, how can I evaluate the aesthetic genius of an architect, if the only thought in my head is whether by chance there will be no public toilet somewhere around ? Closer if we can, that we can't stand it forever, let's go! I felt like I was walking almost every 30 minutes. The other is a long-standing eye problem, for which I take measures, but whether due to travel stress, or some internal anxiety, or slow adaptation to the time difference, I do not know, but it drastically intensified during my stay. And to such an extent that ... to look at something at the other end of the room (a close relative, for example, or a niece)? No problems. But buildings, monuments and other objects, in the distance? Blurred picture. So tell me ... what's the point then? I should hardly say that my first job after returning to Bulgaria was to go through a urologist, ophthalmologist and optician. Maybe these are things I had to tell them on the first day? But don't you think that's how the whole atmosphere would go with my coming? No thanks. Or maybe I should have described them during the argument? But in that case, wouldn't it seem like I was "lying" to them even more in order to turn the argument around and ask for their sympathy? Again ... no, thanks. Congratulations to the people who felt what I can only describe as ... a double standard. Unfortunately you are small, but this in turn shows that things are not so obvious. In other words, my questions about why they don't come and why they rarely call on Skype were asked for a specific purpose. I knew the answers in advance, and I completely agree with them! But I told them the opposite, because I wanted the conversation to look like this: - Why don't you go out? - Because I'm sick, I saw the city last time. You three are far more important to me! "Ah, no, we don't believe you." You are lying to us! - Well, why do you call Skype so rarely? - Because work and the child, we need a break, this is not a reality show. "Ah, no, I don't believe you." You are lying to me! I had the full intention of continuing the argument by clarifying that no, I don't really mean that, that I'm saying it on purpose - to draw parallels from the conversation earlier, to see what they can actually tell me in response to "no, you're lying". The answer, however, was icy. And when I tried to apologize later, they said, "Oh, nothing," but neither of them wanted to talk to me. Finally, I would like to share the following: I really have my fears. And I admit that they are somewhat irrational, but there is nothing I can do about it. As others wrote - yes, there are people of all kinds, with their specific features and quirks ... and somewhat crazy tendencies. I really went with the main goal to see them - I did not perceive at all that I was "given a vacation", but rather that I was given the OPPORTUNITY to see each other live. It may sound grandma, but ... these are the facts. And the niece turned out to be a wonderful child. Within half an hour, she clung to me like a honey fly, and even her parents told me (before the argument, de) that they had never seen her react in such a way to an outsider, ultimately unknown to her. The moments with them, even if they were mostly early in the morning and late afternoon-evening during the working week, were COMPLETELY enough for me to be PLEASED to be there, and my opinion before my visit - "Do I have a child? Neutral, but rather NOT" - and turned 180 degrees after her. * * * Look, in the end with this story I have the following goals: On the one hand to get out of my head, because time does not pass, I think about it and I get dumb ... and 3 months have passed since then. On the other hand, to find out how much I really crushed the onion as much as I feel it; do they still have a bitter taste in the mouth from what happened ... or whether I'm just imagining it. If I raise the subject, I don't want it to look either in a wedge or a sleeve. And thirdly ... I'm worried. My head can't hold it - to know each other all our lives, to have had no problems, suddenly this happens and ... END? And they roll for ten years, for example, and they say to themselves, “What is X doing now?” But then they think of THIS incident and they say to themselves, “Abeee .... what do I really care! to get so! And I am ready to take any measures and do what is necessary to fix my relationship with the family ... all of a sudden this happens and ... END? And they roll for ten years, for example, and they say to themselves, "What is X doing now?" to get so! And I am ready to take any measures and do what is necessary to fix my relationship with the family ... all of a sudden this happens and ... END? And they roll for ten years, for example, and they say to themselves, “What is X doing now?” But then they think of THIS incident and they say to themselves, “Abeee .... what do I really care! to get so! And I am ready to take any measures and do what is necessary to fix my relationship with the family ...
We can't help a psychiatrist here
I don't know if you're a man or a woman, but you have some obsessions. You could present the incident in a specific and clear way and the audience could comment on it, each from his own company. Instead, you released it as a crossword puzzle for more confusion. You tend to mix some intrigue out of nowhere. At first, everyone had some idea of what would happen. Remember that the hosts welcome you, work, have a small child plus an outsider who has to entertain, comply, serve, etc. When you get health complications, instead of behaving like a pinched girl, you had to give them let me know if it's not something too intimate, of course. Hanging in someone's home takes the hosts out of their usual rhythm and brings them tension and discomfort. And this is not about who you are close to. For the simple reason that the situation does not exist, in which you were close to someone. Your visit has left a nasty memory on you, be sure that they too. From now on, if you think you've hurt someone, apologize and clarify. But without being annoying and unsubstantiated. It also depends on what strategy others will adopt. But if you try to clarify, at least you will be calm that you did everything you could.
Until 29 You write that you "mix some intrigues out of nothing", and "Your visit has left a nasty memory on you, be sure that they too", how does this number work? Either it's an insult (as stated in the TITLE) or not! Everything else is a context that provides information about what happened. If you thought the story was too vaguely written - well, I'm sorry, but the moderators thought otherwise by approving it, as well as the twenty or so comments below it. There may be an obsession, but precisely for the insult: if I didn't have it and I imagine everything (just an obsession), then the majority would say so and the obsession would disappear. But if there is, then the question becomes: how can the relationship be fixed? Do you have a REAL answer to this question?
Fear of rejection to have? I was led to this thought by the fact that you initially present yourself in the light of the family, which can be interpreted as a protective reaction against possible rejection by the people on the site; You write that your child has stuck like a honey fly (he didn't throw you away, he liked you); You took their remark as an insult or thought (impressed) that they were offended (fear of rejection); You are angry that they don't write to you more often on Skype (same) Your spelling is perfect (perfectionism .. fear of rejection) Cystitis (sometimes due to fear of rejection and perfectionism) I guess some social phobia (fear of going out alone) ..? if it is, it is again based on fear of rejection)
Apparently the "success" abroad cost you your mental health ... How sad ...