First I want to say that sharing this story of mine, I realize very well that I will probably not get approval, but I just had a great need to share, because I can no longer stand !!! It all started two years ago, when on some common occasion the husband of one of my best friends told me that he liked me very much! I naturally did not pay attention to him because I thought he was joking or due to alcohol! But so it happened that I wanted to leave my old job and he offered me to start in his company! ...... And I started - that was my biggest mistake, but I realize it only now! During the first months everything was very good, until his wife had to be away from the state for a week! She hadn't left yet and he started sending me text messages, persuading me to go somewhere to a hotel, he just didn't stop ... ............... I don't know how to wind me, but one evening we went to a town near our town and there we took a hotel and .............. Since then I have been in a relationship with a married man and not just anyone, but the husband of the best my girlfriend! However, our relationship is a little different from the others, or at least I think so! We have a more platonic relationship, we see each other every day at work, we kiss and to that extent, sex is very rare! That's how things went, I didn't have feelings, I lived my life, but ......... one day he quarreled very seriously with his wife and moved away from them and was adamant that he would divorce! At first I was worried that he would divorce because of me and kept telling him that he was doing stupid things and insisting that he return to her, but he was adamant - it was not because of me, he was just tired, he had no feelings, etc. . I've been on my own ever since, I just think about it, I blame myself a lot, I don't know what I thought I could get from this man, and I've always wondered about these women who get involved. with married men, and here I am too !!!! I also realized that I am terribly jealous of his own wife !!! Otherwise, he continues to take down my stars, to explain to me how he has not yet changed his mind and will not go home, but at the same time he is with them! And I continue to get angry and go crazy every time my girlfriend tells me where are they and what will they do !!! I do not expect understanding, I know that only I am to blame and that the only option to stop is to leave work and minimize the views with them .................. I just have feelings and they are stronger than me now !!!!
1 tayylor_stevens answered
I sympathize with you ... I know it's not easy for you ... I understand you, because I'm in a similar situation. Except I'm engaged, and the man I'm cheating on is free. That is, he is divorced ... And I have been married for many years and before I started dating I hadn't cheated, I didn't even think I was capable of that, but here that sometimes fate gives us surprises to find out, that there are moments when even we lose power over ourselves and our own will is not enough to stop and ... there is simply no insurance! And I assumed that I fell in love with the husband of a woman we hated. She was a real bitch, walking straight in front of his eyes like a mess with various men and doing it in pieces. He was kind and she was just kidding him. Well, at one point, the pot broke and they divorced. After the divorce, he happened to pass by my workplace on his way home from work. He was devastated, so devastated that my heart ached for him. It was as if his whole world had collapsed. And so, first of all, sympathy, regret ... At one point I began to realize that I was starting to look at him with different eyes. Something began to sweep my board ... I was so sorry when I looked at him that I began to feel the urge to calm him down, to hug him ... "I shout to myself:" I have brushed something, but it will pass! " Yes, but no! I completely scrolled. I started wanting him as a man and more and more ... I went crazy. I didn't know what to do with this thing. It was like an avalanche, like an element - uncontrollable, uncontrollable ... It was stronger from me ... I started acting like a teenager in love, and I passed the teenage age a long time ago, but ... :) So I started gravitating around this man ... It attracted me like a magnet, just like the light of a candle attracts a butterfly. I could get burned, but I didn't have the strength or the will to think about it. So I started going to the restaurant where he went. Hehe ... He still doesn't know that I went there because of him. :) It must have been a whole year to figure out where the wind was coming from and then more than half a year to make a connection. It was difficult and painful for me, because I acted very carefully and cautiously so as not to intimidate him, and there were no guarantees of success, so it was very difficult for me and I was quite harassed until I achieved what I was striving for. I still succeeded. I shook, I shook for this man, and finally I shook him. Knockout. It seems to have taken, that he liked it because our relationship has been going on for two years. Well, chat-pat makes thorns on my head, but I forgive him because I love him. And I felt so happy when I achieved the cherished goal ... :) It's as if I conquered Everest! :) He's an average man, he's neither Rockefeller nor Alain Delon, but I love him the way he is and I like him. Sometimes I feel remorse, but only sometimes ... In general, I enjoy the moments spent with him and do not draw any projects and plans for the future. I do not intend to spoil my family and upset my loved ones, so everything is done very carefully and very discreetly. It weighs on me, not that it doesn't weigh on me, but there's no other way. I really wish we could walk freely on the street, hug and kiss without worrying that someone will see us, but there is no way ... This is the situation. However, I decided that life is too short and too short for joy, and once I have the opportunity to steal a piece of happiness from it, I will do it without blinking an eye! This is my story. And you do not suffer! Whatever happens - will happen! I wish you luck!