Hello, I am an 18-year-old girl and like most of my peers I decided to take a driving course. I made this decision half a year ago and enrolled in a driving school. I knew from the beginning that it would be difficult for me, but I was motivated to cope. The problem came during the practice exam. I fell into a state that was not clear to me until then. The problem was that I was torn because I confused the direction I was assigned. I was so close, with minor mistakes, in the last minute of the exam .. I believed I would take it .. but out of stress I confused one direction and the answer was no, followed by screams from the examiner, even my instructor could not believe it. I have seldom failed - my work has always been rewarded. Then this condition was unlocked, getting out of the car I started to tremble, not knowing where I was, I could not understand what happened, as if in my mind the only thing left in my mind was the thought that I was incompetent and stupid. Accordingly, I reappeared and during the exam I just went very close to a curb due to tension and again I had no, again insults - you don't think, you don't stand for anything, etc. - just a terrible re-experience. After a week I gathered courage and calmed down - I finally succeeded and I think that my condition will improve. Now you will reproach me that because of the greatest stupidity in the world I have taken myself very seriously ... I know, I don't want that to be the case, but I can't find a way out of this state.
Now I drive, I try, every day I learn something new, I try to fit into the road conditions ... but when I look at the cars - just as I walk and tense up, I remember how severe depression I got, how many nerves I lost . Unfortunately, I did not run away from my condition ... I can't concentrate on my lessons, I can't remember, my thoughts are overwhelmed by the failures I went through. To this day it is so, I constantly remember the words that were said to me. I do not suffer so much from failure, but rather from the verbal attack. Please I want to be as before - to concentrate and abstract. How can I forget and cope, when everyone around me talks about courses and cars .. everything around me reminds me of this ... I absolutely agree that the fact that they broke me on some stupid exam is not a pain to die but depression and fear of not being able to cope with future more difficult challenges just unlocked in me. Everyone finds a change in me, my expression, my appearance - in my head is a mess of bad memories and negative thoughts, I have difficulty breathing, I'm tired, exhausted, and the difficulties are yet to begin - entrance exams, graduation exams, university, confrontation with reality ... I want to recover, to have the strength to move forward. I'm not proud of what I'm becoming, I've withered .. Please give me advice on how to cope ... I want to be my previous self, I want to believe, act and succeed ..
1 fucking_star answered
Please tighten it ... At the age of 20 I got into such movies that I owed 5 figures for the disease called "gambling" and in the end I recovered, and for some exams you get depressed yourself ... It was useless. .. Emmy, as long as you think like that, there is no way you can take this exam ... Where, where you will experience harder things ... You will go back to this memory and you will smile! Keep your head up!