I had a relationship with a man for five and a half years. We did not live together, we are not from the same city, but we heard each other every day with very few exceptions and when he was in Bulgaria we saw each other at least twice a week. Shortly after we met, he lost his job. This lasted four and a half years. During this time he went abroad three times in three months and patched up the situation. We loved and understood each other a lot. Maybe it's because we didn't live together, avoided everyday problems and never quarreled or got angry. He has already found a job last year and I was very happy. I wanted him to live a little, to enter the people, to have self-confidence. During the first years of our relationship before a holiday, he gave me a small amount to buy something. I didn't like that. I told him that I preferred him to buy me something small. Gesture and attention are important to me, and not the thing itself, but the best gift is flowers. You can never go wrong with them. But he apologized for not realizing that he was embarrassed until he stopped paying attention. For the last two years, I have noticed that he already takes me for granted. Only I call. When we see each other, he speaks and I listen. When I want to tell something or share a problem, I notice that he doesn't listen to me, digs into his phone, even interrupts me and talks about something else. Before the holiday he is covered and does not call, does not even appear on Skype. And when the holiday was over, it was as if nothing had happened. I explained it with the fact that there was no money. I told him that this offended me and I did not keep gifts, but at least to greet me. He apologized, but after starting work he continued in the same way. Otherwise, everything went as before. He said he loved me, and I knew he did. It feels somehow. But after another holiday, I couldn't stand it and told him that I couldn't do it anymore and that I felt used. It was very hard for me. I thought he would understand me, but he was offended and never called again. It passed me by and I said to myself that maybe it's a matter of upbringing and character. What's more, I will accept it as a disadvantage. I called him several times, but he was cold and contemptuous. It's been several months and when I see that he's online on Skype, I'm tempted to play him an emoticon. Then I get even more upset and I hate that I don't have the will to delete this person from my life. I don't think I'll ever make it. I haven't seen him in four months and I'm even afraid to meet him by chance, because he may pass me or be with another woman! Please, tell me is there a way to free my mind from this person I just know I have to, but I don't know how.
Answers 11
Don't worry about detecting him when he's not in the same city? There is no such thing as you can't delete a person from your life and he has already done so, this is not a humiliation, but just time shows who was more concerned about the relationship.
You delete it from everywhere: skype, facebook, etc. This way you will not see when it is online and you will not be tempted to write to it. Rejoice that it has happened. Now you have the opportunity to meet someone who really makes you happy, respects and respects you. I wish you to find him quickly.
With another man. :) I did so and it turned out more or less ... I think again about the first one I fell in love with, but when I started dealing with the current boy, little by little my feelings for the first one cooled down. When I see a picture of him or hear his name, something happens to me, my stomach shrinks and I start to remember him and I feel very sad ... But I manage. I advise you to meet another man and get in touch with him. Have sex with him, write to him (but don't get cheeky), talk to him, joke and so on ... You'll manage. Time helps. :)
Seen from the side, you better get rid of this man. Apparently he has no serious intentions when he covers himself before holidays and such nonsense. My personal opinion is that if a person really loves and has strong feelings for someone, he will show it not only materially ... gifts and flowers do not matter much. Start anew, no matter how difficult it may seem to you. If a person does not help himself in such moments, there is no one to do it (I say it from personal experience). The time you have been together is not small at all, so it seems somehow impossible, perhaps, to shake off this person. But time heals and it really does. It will not happen in 2-3 months, but everything requires perseverance and patience. Life constantly brings us together and separates us from people, this is normal ... to move forward, cross out this person from your priorities, don't write to him, don't look for him (because obviously he doesn't want to and obviously has no desire to get together). Try and move on. Good luck!!
I don't think this man cares about you at all! Why do women like you deal with such? Find someone who loves and appreciates you all the time, someone who cares about you! I do not understand this: from rain to wind! Why do you suffer at all? He is not always by your side, he doesn't fuck you on holidays, he doesn't work ... so what are you up to? What do you love or like in it, what makes you happy, explain yourself!
don't deal with this darling, I think there is another one ... and even if he weren't there, if he was interested in you you would feel it ... he would look for you, greet you on holidays ... for me this connection doesn't exist future.
You have to find the will not to look for it. Only time helps in this case, especially when there is nothing to feed your feelings. So avoid talking about it, looking at photos or following it on various social networks. I think he has some more serious problems that he couldn't talk about, and it's good that you understood him early.
There are 7 billion more people in this world .. that's all I'll tell you .. :)
And even better, you haven't seen him, I realize how long you allowed yourself to be a violinist of such a man (not to notice your emotions, not to be interested in your problems). Everything passes, I don't know how it's not insulting to write to him after everything he has done to you. Keep going boldly, look for what you want, people like him are on the road and on the road. Success!
And even better that you haven't seen him, I don't realize how you allowed yourself to be a violinist of such a man for so long (not to notice your emotions, not to be interested in your problems). Everything passes, I don't know how you are not offended to write to him after everything he has done to you. Go boldly forward, look for what you want, people like him are on the road and on the road. Success !
From the author: Thank you for your sympathy, advice and kind words. It's a little easier for me now. Until now, I remembered only the good moments, but when I think about it, other shortcomings emerge that I did not pay attention to. I will hardly think of another man soon. I think they are all the same.