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He And Porn

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I hope the topic does not turn into a quarrel, because I know it is a prerequisite for this. I will ask only for opinions and guidelines, everyone can watch whatever they like. I'm just a little confused and I hope you can help me clarify the situation.

I know my boyfriend is watching porn. I did not raise the issue, he decided to share, and where he had not shared, it is clear. He told me that since he was a child, he had a problem with this - it often happened more than twice a day, he began to think that in order to have a woman, he had to humiliate her and force himself on her (rough sex ). The reason is that until late the girls did not pay attention to him and from so many movies he totally distorted his idea of the man-woman relationship. He objectified them, he imagined violent scenes with random women on the street, etc. I was not pleased to hear all this, but he explained to me that since we have been together, he has changed a lot - there is a far more real and respectful attitude towards women is not absorbed in the notions of forced and aggressive sex with the opposite sex. I believed that it was so and I was very happy, because he was obviously heavy and ashamed. This happened 2-3 years ago, we've been together for a little over 4. And here ... a few months ago I opened a browser that I don't use regularly to delete its history. I look at her and my chin falls. It took me a few seconds to figure out what was going on - once my friend logged in with his Google account and it stayed that way. I didn't dig, I didn't search, but I couldn't help but see. The last searches / visits were on porn sites and names of actresses. Sometimes every other day, other times every day, several times a day, at any time - before we see each other and have sex, minutes after I left them and had sex 3 times. Naked photos of actresses are also quite common. I admit that I went deeper, but at one point I got too much and went out.

So I live with this information, I did not tell him, he must continue in the same spirit, while during this time he repeats to me how this "problem" is left behind. Emmy, I don't know, but doing it so often doesn't seem like you're okay. I don't like that he lies to me and even more that he goes to polish literally minutes after I leave. We have good sex, he seems to like it, he is passionate. We are usually honest with each other to the point of pain, so if there is anything, he will tell me.

The result is that I have lost motivation for sex. I say to myself, “He’s going to get 1-2 when he comes home, why bother?” It’s like I’m with a stranger I have to hug and kiss. I hate it. He himself has almost no problems and problems with erection and performance. He dropped it once and explained to me that he had been a chick 3 times before we saw each other. I still didn't understand why.

People, is all this normal? Am I exaggerating? The problem is not in the viewing, but in the quantity and this frantic search for nudity on such a scale. Many women after such a "discovery" think that something is wrong with them or do not like them enough. I don't have these thoughts, but I hate to touch this person anymore, although I really like him. Can I do something about it? I know that it will not change, it was still 6-7 grade. I want to know how I don't care, because apart from this and 2-3 other little things, he is the most beautiful and cute creature in the world.

Last Updated

July 11, 2020

Author:

tasty_zv

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Published on: July 11, 2020

Published on: July 11, 2020

Published on: July 11, 2020

Published on: July 11, 2020

Published on: July 11, 2020

Published on: July 12, 2020

Published on: July 12, 2020

Published on: July 12, 2020

Published on: July 13, 2020

Published on: July 13, 2020

I am but. 8 again. I didn't go on saying that I had to change the subway, then I forgot. Thus, the mind shuts off when there is a shocking moment. the example I will give to make it clearer is not necessarily his problem or has anything to do with reality at all. Imagine that when he was little, his mother beat him through the other children and he peed, then they made fun of him. At that moment, his mind went off and he forgot. If you talk about the past there is a chance to remember. It is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, from English CBT. When he remembers, he will cultivate in himself a "observer" thought on his own behavior. Every time he wants to use violence, he will think of the reason and in a very short time all this will diminish. It will even seem funny to him. Then he will see you as the girl he loves and is not the same as his mother. After sex he will want you to stay in bed, hug you and just be with you. However, as long as he is not aware of himself, this cannot be changed. You have to constantly prove to him that not all women are like his mother. That's why I say only you can help him. Again, she may not even be his mother. It could be a completely different incident, even with strangers. Or maybe it's something that happened to him periodically. For example, my mother beat me until I was 15, say speeches every other day. It was like that with the girl, with whom we were like ass and panties 4 her. I had just healed my soul. I confessed everything to her and we were even a psychologist together. Who said that in order to fix the problem we need to fix the connection. She understood this as "he has to fix our relationship". Shortly afterwards, he started cheating on me, and now I'm even much, much worse than before. She is a hopelessly failed single mother, born of the biggest mold on the planet. I have totally lost faith in women. You don't have to get there. Fight your relationship, fight for it, so you fight for all humanity.

Published on: July 13, 2020