Having More Than One Child Is Total Simplicity

   It's simple to tell people how many children to have. Everyone judges for themselves. I have no children, but I have a sister. And I can say that I would not replace it for more attention / things in my childhood. As long as a person is on good terms with his / her brother / sister, this is an irreplaceable connection and support. Have a child, but you have no moral right to tell other people what to do;) This betrays complexes, think about it ..

   This is your opinion. I lost my mother quite early, and I don't have such a strong relationship with my father, so if it weren't for my older sister, I would probably go crazy. Thanks to ours for not being left with just one child. Everything happens in life and having such a close person is very, very important.

   OK, I understand your motives, but if after 4-5 years he tells you I want a brother / sister? No cheats that will interfere with our series, vacations and the new car?

   If all people decide to have one child, human civilization will gradually disappear. Every family should have a minimum of 3. It is not good to be an only child. It is better to have brothers and sisters and to be a big and close-knit family. The only child may not be up now, but in the future he will be terribly bored to spend time with his parents. My sister and I have two children and I am very sorry that we are not three. If it wasn't for my sister, I don't know how I would have survived the years. We've done so many fun things together

   I absolutely agree and accept your reasoning. With us, things are the same - we have a child and we are happy that we can provide him with everything he needs and give him the love, attention and time he deserves. Who wants and can - let him give birth and raise five, I do not mind, but I personally know my strength and I'm here. I do not want to give birth anymore and I do not think that we would have the necessary energy and time to raise a quality and second child.

   Currently, the mortality rate in Bulgaria is as follows - More people die than are born. According to statistics, if each family has at least 2 children, this will be fine. Well, people in two words - we rub ourselves. In 100 years we may not exist as a nation and we are the only ones to blame for that!

   I understand people who don't want a second one because they won't have the money to watch it, but you're going to make the kids monsters. They are the best thing people can have. What irritated me the most was the question "What is my second" for me, so that another person would appear in this world to raise.

   OK, this is your decision and we all have no right to judge and comment, because decisions must be respected and accepted. How to accept if a person does not want to have children or have several. I have a child according to what was written about the months of yours. One thing I can not understand throughout my pregnancy I read how difficult, tiring and annoying to have a baby, and the terrible birth. There is nothing easier than looking after a baby, I have never had so much time that you think of people in your life. You live a lot when I sit in a garden and read a book. Smiling, positive and interesting everyday life. How come one didn't write somewhere how cool and easy it is?

   I will not spit on you. I will only tell you that it is foolish to instill your opinion in others, and even more so to determine what is simplicity and what is not. Everyone judges for themselves, I do not think that having 2 or 3 children almost makes you irresponsible. Everyone decides their priorities and whether they could afford more than one child, and especially whether they would like to have more than one child

   A child is good, but only in the near future, and only for you. The following problems follow in the distance: - It is possible to grow selfish, although it is not guaranteed. - one child - two parents. When it's time to turn the roles around, it will become quite unpleasant for you to watch. - one child, this means that you will have to pay more attention to him, if there are two, they will deal with each other (or together they will drive you crazy, it is not clear). - and of course - population growth thus becomes negative.

   Well, I don't want more than one child. I don't have children at the moment. It is difficult to raise two, the costs are more. Especially if the parents do not earn big salaries, then I see no point in having more than one child, because they will suffer because the parents will not be able to provide them with a happy life. Of course, who has the opportunity to make two or more children great, but one is enough for me.

   You wrote total simplicity, author, I can only apologize for the difficult period - teeth, insomnia, potty, etc. :-) If you write about such things, then the child is about 1.5 - 2 years old. Sorry, dude, but you have no idea about parenthood in the future :-) Let me tell you that this period is over, the child becomes more independent, there is less and less need to be glued to you. At 1 point he goes to the garden, school and starts on his way. Then you have no one to pay so much attention to. Did it ever occur to you that children have their own relationships in which the parents have no place and which will continue even after you are gone? You have as many children as you want, but to speak so emphatically is complete simplicity :-)

   I've only read the title, but I have one child and I don't plan to have more. You will probably spit on me that I do not contribute to the growth of the population or that I am selfish, but that is how I have judged myself and I have my motives and understandings. Whoever wants, let him do more, I respect everyone's decision. By the way, I have no idea where the idea comes from that the population must be constantly growing and for this purpose it must always have many children. I have no intention of competing with gypsies. I am on the principle that it is not the quantity that matters, but the quality. Looking at the population, quantity is the smaller problem. A much more serious problem is quality. Without offending anyone, but they lack basic upbringing and attitude. And this is the real tragedy, not that they don't have 5 children. What are your 5 children for, if there will be another retail thugs with a thinking Ganyo? Better one, but with a mentality. We have Ganyovtsi in abundance anyway.

   It is a matter of personal choice, but my opinion is that you should have as many children as you can give birth to and raise in the best way. There are people who can afford to have only one child financially, others have medical problems. But if you have the opportunity to give life to more children, it is infinitely selfish to think about your time or career, or other nonsense ... Sorry, but the fact that you can not devote time and attention to more than one child, sounds to put it mildly, frivolously and irresponsibly. If you are not a single mother (then it would be understandable), what is your husband for? What do men, serious men, make money for, if not to provide for their families and wives who can devote themselves to their children? For cars and light women? I know I won't like the answer, so take my question for granted. As I said,

   Quick question - If you were pregnant with twins (triplets), what would you do? Would you kill the other children with a knife while there was only one left? Don't talk nonsense please ...

   I think that values ​​today are very distorted. Number 31, for me it is frivolous and irresponsible to create children without thinking in advance, can you give them the necessary time and attention. Yes, some of us imagine that in the upbringing and education of the future man, quality is more important than quantity. By your logic, it turns out that there are no more responsible and serious of the gypsies who vomit children on a conveyor belt and without a gram of preliminary thought and planning. And I do not agree that anything but investing energy and time in the birth of a second (or nth) child is nonsense. It is also important for me to maintain a harmonious relationship with my husband and not to neglect or deprive him of attention, as well as to be able to do everything that we love and that keeps our relationship alive. Many families break up after having a child, precisely because these things are neglected. One relationship is not maintained alone - both partners must devote time and attention and take care of the other. When the relationship between the two parents is harmonious, then the child is happy and the relationship of each parent with him is better. My husband is not just an inseminator, who after the appearance of the child goes somewhere in the 10th plan, nor am I an incubator for him. And his role in the family for me is not limited to earning as much money as possible to provide for me and as many children as possible. And what is left for him as a person? Have you ever wondered why so many men get drunk or distance themselves from their families after having children? Can making money to feed children make someone's life meaningful? Man needs warmth, from understanding, from care, from a human tale, from attention, from an equal partner towards oneself. He needs changes, challenges, opportunities to develop, to travel, to keep discovering new things. No one can convince me that a child of nervous, neglected or exhausted parents feels good and grows happily and without deficits of any kind. Another thing that I do not consider simplicity is that a person must continue to develop after the appearance of the first child and invest time (and energy and resources) in himself - I'm not talking about a career, I'm talking about pure human development and evolution. At least because you can't give the little one what you don't have. You are a value in itself - you do not make sense only with the number of beings that you will bring to light. If the purpose of evolution was to give birth to as many as possible, it would not be necessary to give birth as a human being, because you could perform the same function much more successfully as an animal in a kennel - nature knows its job and does not tolerate surpluses, you do not think Is it that if this is what you had to do, she would not have remembered and equipped you with the necessary for the purpose a long time ago? And yes, I'm selfish - eat me with rags - we can afford to raise a few children, but we don't want to! One thing is enough for us - I love him and give him as a mother the best I can. I love my husband too, and I enjoy pampering myself, raising and loving our only child, traveling back and forth, doing different things together, and keeping our relationship alive and the family healthy. We are so happy.

   It is good for the child to have only one, he will not share the inheritance, if there is one. It is bad for the state. If all Bulgarians have only one child, their number will decrease exponentially and for several generations the consequences will be fatal. Even worse, there are other ethnic groups in the country that have 10 children each. So think what will happen to Bulgaria.

   Your thoughts are provoked by your love for your first child. You don't want to share time for him with another child, you don't want to deprive him of another child, you don't want to share your love in two. All this because you did not give birth to your second child. And if you have 10, you will love them all as much as you loved the first one. Motherly love is not shared, it is unlimited. As you love your mother and father very much, so you can love your two children. But don't give birth to it, if you don't want it, don't do it. Everyone makes these decisions in their own lives. You want a child, you have a child, great. Rejoice, you are happy and everything is fine.

   And I will not spit on you, really better one child, but raised well, than two, but poor. Everyone judges.

   Everyone should have as much to watch and love. Watching more than one is not difficult. It was harder for me with one. It was glued to me every minute. Now they play and it's much better. I love my children very much and I look after them with desire. I can say that my eldest son changed in a positive direction after the appearance of the youngest. They pull each other, compete, help each other, defend themselves, hide, unite, always rely on each other. The relationships between children are invaluable. And since you're saying you're studying on a potty now, I'm going to say that the second one, I just asked him if he wanted to pee like Daddy, and that was it. Learn in one day. He was a year and a half old. At 4, he read because his uncle read in first grade. It is incomparable. They are an example and a support. The fact that it is difficult for you now is not authoritative for years to come.

   Author, your opinion is stupid. Except that if everyone thinks like you, we will disappear, as they wrote above, but having only one child is not a guarantee that you will give him the best and make him a literate person. To raise a valuable person does not depend so much on the number of children (although this also has an impact), but on the quality of parents, relatives, living environment and more.

   I am 10th grade and I completely agree with the lady what it is like for you to have more than one child or even to have at all why we should try to ruin our beauty, to hurt us mega much, to be ashamed to look our husband in the eyes because we don't go to work for 3 years. and we have almost no financial means o I forgot about the meager money they give for the first year of motherhood. But I can't understand why we should stigmatize people who don't have, don't want to have children or only one, I'm not the only child, but I think we should let people live as they want if the demographic crisis worries you so much. let your many children go outside Bulgaria and betray their homeland.

   I also already read at 4, but without having a dad or poop.

   Grief, grief, great grief, is to have only one child. Good luck to the author .... She must be right and she must be very wrong.

   Given that there are fewer intelligent people here, I explain my comments. There are also some well-meaning people. How can you create life, give birth to children "without thinking much about it", as someone above advised. You became better gypsies. Also, what did you think of this state, you were even worried that if one child was born in a family, we would disappear. These rulers look good, they don't need more slaves to steal their money from them. How much help does the state give and how much good work is done to make you think about it and our goal is to have children ... children are born not for the state, but for ourselves. And whoever wants one will have it and that's it. In my opinion, many idiots with several children feel hot and defend the thesis of having more children, because they do not want to admit how naughty they are. It is difficult with one child, let alone with more. And this mother above, who talks to me about marmots and chocolate in foil, to admit that is not true. It's all two, with two children. The clothes, the food, but how will you take them to gardens, school, everyone wants time to train him, you can't give birth to him and leave him, he wants to talk to him every day, otherwise it will become a total habit, but obviously these things do not are important to her. To give birth to him, to watch each other ... fuck the smart, eh! Nothing. And when they start looking for their eyes, fighting, asking what is wrong with my brother and what about me ... how many egotists there are who come from families with 2 and 3 children, how many problems there are and how they kill each other constantly. they pull their parents by the blouses and ask for attention. Even if they are two and play together, they still need a mother and a father and will not leave you alone. It's just that when there are two you have more worries and if with one you had time to wash your hair and eat, with two you don't even have time to bake! That's right ... well, those of you who are very worried about the state and it's falling apart, you have children, but you probably don't have one, but you give a reason ... It's best to have one. A child who makes you a parent and makes you happy, and those who want more, just do not appreciate their child ... Everyone should give birth as much as they want, but not have to.

   Number 43, why didn't you let him go straight to university to become a professor. Why go from 1st to 12th grade if so? That's exactly how you sound. Understand, every child has a path of development and you can't skip commitments. With two children it is quite difficult. There are many more and different problems with more children.

   Do you think that someone will go to have children for the state ?? Are you serious? Slaves for politicians?

   49, of course, that every child has a path and time for development that he cannot skip. However, it is a fact not only of my children, but also of those around us that the latter develop much faster than the former. On the one hand they have an example to follow from the older child, while when the child is alone, he just has to move forward, there is no one to equate one kind :-) On the other hand, parents already have experience with the first, do not repeat or at least reduce mistakes in upbringing and education, less worry and overdo it. I have caught myself behaving unconsciously with my uncle as if he were younger than his years, while with the little one - on the contrary, as if we were older than her years. Somehow we unconsciously narrow their difference and with her we are more on the principle you're a dad, he can, you can do it too ":-) It's figuratively speaking, of course,

   Number 50. Very, very, very stupid thinking. People are a resource. Both for the state and for the family. The more the better. You do not punish anyone by giving birth to only one child, no one but yourself. But nothing, I wish you to raise one child, to grab his hammer and get away from this "crazy Bulgaria and its politicians". Then what are you going to do? Safe from short-sighted people who think only of their asses. They both think only of themselves and want someone else to think of them as well. So who, like everyone, thinks only of themselves? It is no coincidence that politicians are like that, they are no different from people like you!

   For those who are interested, let him look for and read a little about the 4-2-1 problem and the Chinese policy for 1 child. Why is it really bad to have only 1 child in the long run. Policy implemented on a national scale and its consequences (very, very bad).

   Hey big cut, then half the comments are missing! You only post comments that support the author.

   Oh yes! Really. 48, the audience on the site has understood well - she is one of us. Well, I have two children and to the surprise of the intelligent commentator, they are not "inhabitants". And I am proud and satisfied with this "simplicity" that I have done by giving birth to two sons.

   One, one, but you deprive him of the bond that is built between siblings, important for his mental development. If you want and do not give birth. For everyone to live as they see fit, it is not necessary to impose it on others. Number 45, read the social security code well, make sure you write illiterately, change your mindset that the child is only the mother's. It also belongs to the father, so in the first years it is normal for the father to support his family, just as the mother devoted herself to their common child. And when you finish these things, only then give birth.

   My husband grew up in a family with two other brothers. He often talks about his childhood, constantly returning to traumatic moments. The money was not enough, a sick father, the mother could not cope with the care of her husband and the boys. So he - a full excellent student at school, since 7th grade, ie a 14-year-old child, starts working: first in a diner, then distributes newspapers, then in a hardware store, etc. There are no parties with friends, no nice clothes, no discos, nothing. He graduated brilliantly, but was forced to give up his dream of higher education because someone had to feed his younger brothers, and his father was getting worse. At least he gets a good craft ... And so the whole future of a smart man goes to the movies! Today he earns his money with hard work in a very uncertain environment, sometimes I wonder how he survives. I am a child in the family. My parents were never rich - a teacher and an engineer. From the first grade a private teacher came home with English, then with Russian, then I went to preparatory drawing lessons for the Art High School. After graduating, I enrolled in a university in Russia, where, however, I managed to win a scholarship for excellent achievement, so my mother and father finally took a break from spending. It was not easy for me to be away from home during the crisis of the 90s, but I graduated. I have been working in the specialty for 20 years. Why am I sharing family biographies here? To support the author's thesis that a child to whom you can give the best, according to your abilities as a start, is preferable to three who spend their whole lives dreaming nightmares from their miserable childhood and the ridicule of others. In adulthood, my husband's eyes water,

   Total simplicity is the title of the topic. I know at least 4 professors, the wife of one is an associate professor, she also writes poetry, the others are women with higher education, people who I can by no means call simple, who have 2 children each. They did not complain that their children hindered their development or work, respectively their children studied and were well brought up. People are different, I also know families with one child, in which scandals and infidelities do not stop.

   Up to 34 No. I would give the excess for adoption :)

   Many years ago I was traveling on a train and a woman in the compartment was talking about her deceased son, the only one, with great sadness. A gypsy woman said: "You are very stupid, ma! I have 4 children. And if one dies, I will survive it." Then there was no more conversation, no more to say.

   I respect your choice to have only one child. And I understand it - you put a minimum of effort and resources to be a parent. I have three, and I hope to become four next year. I also see that you do not respect my choice. This is total simplicity.

   I have two children with a difference of almost 3 years! Well, let me tell you, two children look at each other much easier than one :) They grow up together, play, fight (there are two boys) and look for each other and love each other. There is nothing better than that - our house and our hearts are full :)

   Number 60, did you remember to ask the gypsy in question about the names of the children and which class they went to school with? Because she and Kompiritsa (the mother with many children in Bulgaria) had many children, but half of them didn't even remember their names, let alone take care of them! So it's easy to be born 10, but then who watches them?

   Ah, number 60, if things were that simple in this life. I know a family with 4 children. Two of them were quite smart and diligent, but a little spoiled as children. They went to study abroad, graduated, worked there, did not return to their parents. Their other two children (brother and sister) are not talking now because they are angry with theirs for the way they have been assigned apartments. So, we have a wealthy family that has bought their children homes, but they have grown up, become greedy and bad people, and can't sit at the same table together even on a holiday. The parents are extremely lonely. So, no, the number does not determine anything. It is rather a wish, but does not guarantee security, stability or closeness.

   60, no civilized person enters into a dialogue with various gypsies - that's why the conversation is over. Come on, ask a mother whose child has died, whether she has experienced it, or vice versa - she mourns every day, albeit secretly, even though there are still children alive. Many people with more than one child explain this - that a mother loves all her children equally. So how can he survive that one of them has died, unless he is like the gypsy in question you are telling us about. But even if she was this gypsy, this tragedy didn't really happen to her, she was just talking nonsense, such as her, their capacity is so simple. In most cases, as if people with many children are still as simple as this gypsy, there are exceptions, but most are simple. We know weeds multiply much more, faster and easier than cultivated plants - this is reality, this is nature. If some people don't like this fact, it's their problem, the only thing they can do is just put up with it.

   From 50 to 52, "stupid reasoning, ass thinking, selfishness and short-sightedness" - a lot of insults. I don't stop you from reproducing, I don't mind you from having an opinion, I don't care how you live, I write what I think, and if you don't like it, make arguments, and don't try to offend strangers. By the way, not all people are a quality resource, neither for the family, nor for the state.

   I am 52. I think I left at least two arguments. And the most important thing for you is the continuation of the family. It is true that some genera should not continue, but by logic they multiply the most. And it will happen like this as long as there are people like you (don't decide that I'm insulting you again - I mean people who don't want children). Politicians have nothing to do with the whole thing. Bulgaria needs Bulgarians. If you don't feel part of society, so much the worse. Both for you and for us. There is no way to know who will be quality before he is born. Therefore, more must be born in order to have more quality.

   35, if my husband is such a slut that he suffers from a lack of attention and time spent because of the baby, I would immediately drop him for someone of better quality. Fortunately, this can happen from the beginning, so I wouldn't let it in at all, let alone give birth to a child from it. If the man is valuable and responsible, he would understand that the family no longer consists of two and that we can spend time together caring for the child.

   68 - I think you answer automatically without understanding what I'm actually saying. My husband and I have always been very close. He is my partner and my life partner, the person I want to grow old with and nothing and no one will replace that. I don't see him as an inseminator who, after giving me the child I want, can now step into the background and focus on our support, and I can't understand women starting to ignore their husbands because of the child. For me, such women have never truly loved their partner - it was just that in some way, consciously or not, it was appropriate and convenient for them on the way to the status of husband and mother. A man who loves his wife does not have to be asked to cancel her and share the care of the child on an equal footing - he just does it because it comes from within and because he holds on to his partner and sees, when it is difficult for her - she does not feel overwhelmed and does not weigh on him and this is precisely because she knows that he is loved and that his partner also cares for him. After all, the child is exactly the expression of the two of us as a couple, what we wanted and created together and that is why we love, watch and protect him. And there is no way, if we are not in harmony with each other or we are unhappy, it does not affect the child - examples of this from their environment, unfortunately, everyone has seen and can give. I think that many women do not understand exactly that a harmoniously developing child exists only when the relationship between the parents is nurtured and flourishes. The child is part of your husband, of the person you love - if you deny and distance yourself from him, consciously or not you are harming your child. That is why nurturing the relationship and caring for the partner is an obligation of both parties and becomes especially important after the arrival of a child. It is when each parent feels loved and cared for by their partner that looking after the child is not a sacrifice or deprivation of something, but the pleasure of time spent together and shared care. of 35

   The topic is complete simplicity! Providing everything does not always lead to a better quality of life. Many satisfied people have completely different problems and addictions, and the people themselves are not happy. Everyone says they have a child so they can be more satisfied, but in fact they secretly fear for their own satisfaction.

   №65, the cultivated plants are currently reproducing at the speed of the woman with the tragedy from the train - to complete extinction. Regarding the financial issue - 4 children with education, apartments, etc., but still simple as weeds. Only that the gypsy woman knows that when the children grow up they will not throw her out on the street, but will watch her when she is weak. And before it crashes, they will push her to look after her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Simple, but not like the exalted Bulgarians who live abroad and are ashamed of their parents. BTV, I am a Bulgarian, don't condemn me as a gypsy.

   Author, You remind me of an acquaintance of mine and a relative - and she, like you, has an only child who is 2 and a half years old. And she, unfortunately, does not think of having a second child, and her husband (my husband's brother) wants to have another child - and a male. I want to tell you, darling, that you should not attack people who want to have children. If everyone thought like you, it is certain that Bulgarians will remain a minority in the future, and this is bad for Bulgaria as well. If all Europeans and Bulgarians thought like this: "What is more than one child for me? Or" Why should I have children? "- then Europe, Europeans and Bulgarians would be in great danger - to disappear or to (NOT to be !) mix with NON-Europeans (I mean Arabs, Africans, Gypsies, Turks, etc.) Europe and Bulgaria need a high white, European birth rate! Dear Author, In the history of mankind there are many examples of families with one child and families with more than one child. In the first (ie families ONLY with 1 child) are those who could only give birth to 1 and only child, and could not have more than 1 child, for some reason - be it physiological or due to other important circumstances, but the fact that they had 1 child did NOT mean that they did NOT want children in general. In the other case - there are families with MORE than 1 child - historically, there were even royal and royal families who had more than 2-3 children. Among the people there were also families with more than 1 child. And these families do NOT make them simpletons, that's why they already have more than 1 child. Only gypsies are simpletons, because they give birth to many children and do not look after them well, but we, the Bulgarians and the Europeans, are NOT like the gypsies. Author, don't judge other people. Think about yourself and your future. I wish you to think and have a desire to give another human life and be a mother of more children.

   I am shocked how someone allows himself to call such simplicity such a personal decision. I have two children. I have time for my husband, for my profession, for myself and for my girlfriends. It's called time management. I have a colleague who is 4. We recently took an exam - she is 40, I am 45. Well, she did brilliantly, nothing that she has 4 children, that she teaches students every morning. And I don't know how he does it, he also finds time for sports. There isn't even a cleaner. And it's not totally simple at all. Simple are those who stick classifications, like the author.