I have been living in Germany for a year and a half and I feel very depressed. I am 22 years old and I do not like the life I lead at the moment. I feel very strong nostalgia, I miss my family and friends terribly. At first I thought that this feeling would disappear and I would feel good, but I am in a more settled country where I can develop, where they will appreciate my work and I will live better and it really is, but I am not happy! I have a lot of problems and I am under a lot of stress. I owe a lot of money to various institutions, I don't have a wife by my side, I feel lonely. I don't even know how I can best describe my feelings, I just want things to work out for me and live a happy and peaceful life. I don't like the job I do either! Since I've been here, I've only suffered disappointments and I'm starting to dislike myself, which inevitably affects me. Most people withdrew from me, I was left with only one friend, and no matter how much I repeat that I don't really care, it's not like that. The other problem is that I've never had a serious girlfriend, and the worst part is that I don't even try to find one. Language is also a big obstacle for me to do it, and it is terribly difficult for me and no matter how hard I try, I can't learn it. My self-esteem is very low at the moment and I don't know how to get out of this hole. I play sports, I read books, I watch movies, but nothing helps. I don't know what to do with my life and I am already at an age where I have to work on my future. I read somewhere that a man without a dream is dead. That's right, and I'm like just an extra in the movie and living my stupid life. No goals without dreams in a country I don't like with a bunch of problems. I think that if I find a girlfriend I will start to like myself much more, but I don't have any money. I work a lot, and everything goes to pay, even when there is something left for me there is not much to go because I live in a small town, and so far I have lived in Sofia and this is a step backwards for me. I just want to pour somewhere everything that has accumulated in me because otherwise I will go crazy! Please give some advice and share your experience! I just want to pour somewhere everything that has accumulated in me because otherwise I will go crazy! Please give some advice and share your experience! I just want to pour somewhere everything that has accumulated in me because otherwise I will go crazy! Please give some advice and share your experience!
1 gunner_vin answered
Hello author, I'm glad you're looking for answers to your problems. The first thing you notice in your story is that you want the best of both worlds, the one in Bulgaria and the one abroad. You want both to have carefree gatherings with friends, cafes, discos, etc., and to have valuable work and a decent salary today and now. You want both to receive a high European salary and not to owe a lot of money to institutions when you break their laws. However, as you have understood, this "average" life does not exist in Germany, and you will not find it anywhere in the world. So the way is either to join their society living in their way, observing their rules, norms, and morals or income and pay miserable ridiculous fines, such as 20 for parking in a green area and EUR 34 annual vignette for the car. The second thing that is noticed is that you deceive yourself, that you have no dreams. In fact, it's not like that, if you didn't have dreams, you wouldn't think about your difficulties at all, you wouldn't even go abroad at all. Everyone has dreams or goals, as you want to call it. People are divided into two according to the set goals, some set majestic goals important for the whole society, as the goals of Levski "if I win, a whole nation wins, if I lose I lose only myself", the second or the others set, like you and me, small life goals most often of a material nature: wife, home, good income, family, children, car, vacation at sea with friends, etc. I hope you understand what your dreams are, the man without goals and dreams lies in the field and mre. Even just lifting the spoon to your mouth is for food. " I don't know what to do with my life and I am already at an age where I have to work on my future. "You are very wrong here, a person is at an age where he works for his future since kindergarten, in primary school through education, there he lays the foundations for his future. Everything you will achieve in life depends on what you have accumulated It is clear to you that if you have completed secondary education at a technical school in road transport, your future is probably not in the ministerial chair in the Ministry of Transport, but it is important to look at what you have and play your cards. so that you get the optimal price of your efforts so far.I understand that you do not like the cards in your hands, but first they are a consequence of your efforts so far, second you have to choose spades or cups you will collect in your hand. Personally, my experience is like that and I was in Germany and I did not like their mentality and way of life, I also realized that when I go there to work I admit to everyone and to myself that I am from the lowest class in my profession and barely I do not agree with everything they offer me, and they offer me their crumbs. I returned to Bulgaria and today I work in my profession for a salary of BGN 2,000. When I was in Germany I did not have 1000 euros after paying for accommodation, but here I do not pay for accommodation I have my own home and with this salary of 2000 BGN I live much better than the time I was enslaved by Germans, separately here and now there is a chance to grow up. So the choice is yours, life is yours, you just don't have to be afraid. Even if you make the wrong choice at the moment, you always have a chance, or at least until you turn 40, to start over. Good luck and success.