Forward Or Backward. Help

Hello, I am very confused and I will be happy if I get advice, because I need it very much now. I am a boy of 24 years old, I am from a small town, I work, I have a girlfriend of 17 from almost a year with whom we get along and a wonderful family. So far so good, but the big problem I'm facing is my ex-girlfriend. When I was 15, I met my first student love. The girl in question was 14, she was in 8th grade, and I was in 9th, we were children. We were together for almost seven years for a long time, I can safely say that we grew up together. Our relationship was very emotional, we were constantly looking for ways to spend more time together. We loved each other a lot, she was always my weakness, to be honest I was in love, I never looked at another girl, just because I liked only her, the feelings were mutual. I'll tell you a little more about her, she's a crazy head in a good way, of course. She did great things for me, often ran away from them at night (when she was a student) just to come and kiss me, we went on all kinds of trips, we had picnics every Sunday, a very cool and funny person and a great beauty I can not deny. He always moved everything in parallel, love and learning and friends and family. The moment came when she graduated, she enrolled to study part-time, we had no problems with that because Plovdiv is 30 minutes away and she went by car when she had lectures or exams, as well as worked in the city. Two days after her 20th birthday, her grandmother and the person she loved the most, her grandfather, died suddenly of cancer, he died three months later, and two months later her mother was also diagnosed with cancer, followed by two major surgeries. She was very mentally ill from all this stuff, she experienced everything very hard, she became very nervous, she made money on me, we started arguing about the smallest things. I knew it was normal and I made compromises because I knew this difficult time would pass. But at one point she told me that she was only hurting me and that it would be better to separate. I didn't want to, so she was everything to me, but I also said that it would be best to give ourselves some time because our scandals were very frequent and became more and more nasty. Then she went to Plovdiv with her friends, I don't judge her, she just obviously wanted to run away from everything in order to cope with this depression. Time passed, she stopped looking for me completely, I received information about her only from her friends. For more than a year I suffered as a child, everything around me was gray, I missed her terribly, my love for her did not disappear, I fell asleep thinking about her and woke up with the same thought. My current girlfriend appeared, I decided to try because I wanted to forget her, Yes, but it doesn't work, now I hurt her because I love another. A month ago I had a job in Plovdiv, I decided to call her, because she rarely picks me up, I decided to just try, I didn't expect her to pick me up. But she picked it up, we even drank coffee, we talked about everything, in my eyes and I saw that she loved me, it was obvious that I was not indifferent ... I have known her very well since then. I can't think of anything else. We started writing to each other all the time, I realize that she is the person for me and I want to be with her. But how to tell all this to the girl I am with and who is very much in love with me, I will hurt her a lot. What would be the right thing to go back to the girl who settled in my heart and experience this crazy love or move on, it's really hard for me. But my feelings are stronger than myself! Help