Hello. I am writing this story in order to share it with someone who can understand me ... and can best be done by an anonymous person. That is why I turn to this site and ask for my story to be published. Most likely, for most of you, the story will seem extremely familiar to you and you will say to yourself :, Come on again, children's film! ''. It really weighs on me when I start thinking a lot ... I'm lonely. I have real friends who have proven themselves more than once to be like that, but I'm lonely not because of that. Almost all my girlfriends and friends have caught someone ... someone who truly loves them. Even girlfriends who have hurt me too much to forgive them are happy ... and I'm not. I'm not the type of person who can't be happy or who envies other people's happiness.
On the contrary, just the opposite ... I've done a lot for the people I love, I have covered up my best friends thousands of times to go see my boyfriends. I have helped my close friends - a boy and a girl - to get together, even if it means that I am a total backup plan, that they naturally they will want to enjoy each other, and that I will be alone again. I can always tell them, I know this, I know that they will listen to me, I know that they will always be by my side .. But how did I deserve to be alone .. I do not deny that I am difficult to win, but why everyone should to give up when they see it so. I don't know what's wrong with me, my character is not like most girls and I'm extremely patient .. I don't get angry about almost anything, I never get angry about nonsense .. I'm not jealous of stupid things. I have a really good heart. I always try to be useful to people, even to those who have hurt me a lot. Why it must be so unfair, why it must be so. Why good people are not always reciprocated. Life is not easy, I know, I do not complain, although I manage everything on my own, even at this early age. I'm not a 12-13 year old filmmaker who wants to attract attention. I think about others, I try to do my best. The best of me so that others can be happy. I am grateful that I have real friends, I am grateful that I have many other things ... But why me. I repel most guys who show interest because I'm afraid of being hurt again. And only by repelling them will I know that I am safe. It's not a bad thing to be so careful, but how do I fight with myself sometimes? How can I stop demanding so much of myself, how can I stop looking for all the guilt in me when I know that is not the case.
My heart freezes more and more, I get colder with time, I get used to relying more and more only on myself. And I don't want this to be so .. I pray that someone will dare to fight and win me .. I pray that someone will finally break my stubbornness, someone will finally break down the barriers of my heart .. someone who will let me grab and not let me go .. someone who loves me, who will make me love him unconditionally. Someone real. I feel superfluous next to my girlfriends, all committed, without 1-2 to whom I can complain. I feel alone, surrounded by so many people. I feel bad and no one understands me. Alas, this is obviously life nowadays and even people who are very difficult to bear find someone to love them. And the decent and the good in most cases are left alone.
1 dickdrainer420 answered
I read and wonder if I'm laughing or sorry. You describe yourself as good, but at the same time you want someone to fight your stubbornness. In my opinion, tying two people is not a war, and each sends a signal to the other that he wants it and so a connection is made, but you are obviously expecting a guy armed to the teeth to throw you on the shoulder, chained and say: - From today you are mine. With your contemptuous behavior towards men, you will write here for a long time and you will enjoy other people's happiness ... not that you are happy, but you just envy them, but they do not inflate and do not consider men geeks.