Did I Become A "slut"?

The Story

Hello, 19 year old girl. I'll start with the fact that I had 1 serious relationship at 16, with which I lost my virginity, but I was not delighted with sex, with the end of the relationship I stopped thinking about sex at all. I was hurt, I had other things in my head and so. I had sex with another boy, but again I don't admire sex, I didn't find it for anything, an act during which I enjoy it and up there. I recently ended a serious relationship again. I had a friend for almost a year, but things changed completely with him. It was a full-fledged relationship, in terms of sex, I can only say that I have not had such amazing sex and it was better and better every time. With him, I somehow opened up completely and even did things I never thought I would ever do. The last time I just had sex, nothing more, I just enjoyed it, but with my last friend ... I expressed a desire to play roles, I gave him a whistle, to be honest I liked it and quite often I did, not to mention almost every act, I bought perverted sets of underwear, clothes, toys. I became very perverted. There have been times when we just sit outside in a park and talk and I imagine being a dog and moaning. We were sitting on the beach with friends and when they turned I grabbed his penis. I don't know, I've never been like that. I was always modest, shy, I was literally uncomfortable touching my friend's pants at all, and after a while I went crazy. We sent each other naked pictures while I was blowing him, I looked him in the eyes, I played, I harassed him, I tore him. We broke up, and even though I suffered and I'm still sad, I'm thinking about sex. I think how good it was for us last time. He offered me to have sex only now, but I really won't be able to, considering that I love him, I still can't imagine sitting or lying near him, having sex and not crying. He just doesn't love me anymore, I respect myself and I wouldn't be "used" just for sex. I want it physically. Like I said, I've become a slut, I imagine how I fuck him, how we do it, masturbate, I have a rich imagination. This boy changed me a lot.

Last Updated
August 05, 2020
Author:
germionag

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