A few years ago I experienced one of the most shameful things in my life, I wish I could erase it from my memory forever ... I had broken up with my first boyfriend and hadn't slept with anyone else since, but time passed and he wanted me to try sex overnight. I accidentally arranged with a friend at the next party to arrange a boy for this purpose. There was a boy in their company who was something of a gigolo, only without being paid — whoever had sex knew that he was always there. He had slept with so many girls and everyone knew what he was like. We went to the same school with him and we met many times, and he was nice to me. I went to the party and was very excited, as if I were a virgin again. He came after me and didn't say a word to me the whole time, but a little later he motioned for me to follow him outside. He started looking for a free room and we went into the bedroom. He just concluded and told me to 'undress' (as if I were being examined). In fact, he failed to turn me on at all, except that he seemed to have a lot of experience. We had sex for a very long time, and it could not end - at least 1 hour. In the end, I didn't feel anything anymore, I was just numb from all this flattery. He decided to finish alone, and I just stood next to him. But the most inconvenient thing was that he unwittingly ended up on the bedroom headboard. Horror! Then we got dressed and someone started knocking on the door, we opened and a girl and two boys came in, they started making fun of us, and one of the boys liked me and when he saw me he looked at me with such disgust. The girl scolded me for not using a condom, how dangerous it was, and generally told me that I was the biggest bitch in the world. They also wanted me to clean the headboard of the bedroom, but I didn't do that anymore, the one who did it went downstairs. After we went downstairs, the same boy didn't even look at me, but behaved like a stranger. It hurt me even more, not because I wanted him to hug and kiss me, but at least to talk to me. The next few days I felt so awful, I really felt like a bastard. I no longer wanted sex overnight, I realized that sex is not just an exercise in which you put nothing but your body. I no longer had a desire for such a thing, I deserved something really good. The stupid thing was that we met at school and I blushed with shame, and I started to like him. It was strange to me that he saw me naked, that he kissed me everywhere, and then he was just a stranger to whom you only say, "Hello" and nothing more.