Am I Crazy?-mangueira_oficial

Hey, now it's time for me to complain on this site. I've read similar stories of mine before, but not quite like that. I wrote the title because I was beginning to doubt whether I was crazy, because in the 21st century it is obviously normal for some things to happen this way, which I will describe. So, I'm 18, girl, so far I haven't had a serious relationship because I don't want to and I'm a little bad about boys, maybe because I think most people are looking to use the girl for what you know, not to write it to it doesn't happen that they don't publish my topic because of that. Not that I want to be alone all my life, but my character is like that, I'm a bit of a closed person, I can't just go talk to a boy and be impudent, and I don't want to use each other with him. My goal, at least for now, is to finish high school, because no matter how much others don't care, it's important to me, because success for me is a better option than a relationship that will last 2 months. So, why do I have such an opinion about the boys ... a year ago I met one and at least it seemed strange to me that he wanted to see me on the third day, without having written to each other who knows how much and on top of everything on the same day he offered me, but I told him that we couldn't go without knowing each other, from two chats and things would happen, but he started threatening me anyway and shouted: either we will have a relationship or I don't want to have anything to do with you, it's like choosing to be together and when we break up, we would remain friends, but now we couldn't ... then he admitted that he said it only because he wanted to use me, he wanted us to be together, but he was just doing various things and apparently wanted a relationship for no more than a month. It became very clear to me, especially when I saw it during the day ... it's ugly to tell you that they just want to use you and won't really love you anyway, it was ugly for me for 2-3 months, because when I liked him, I thought he was decent, we had common interests, and he turned out to be a user. Before that, others have tried to offer me various nonsense, but I just block them and do not deal with perverts, you know that they will either write on Facebook, or find a way to write to you elsewhere. Then I met another 21 years old, but he did not live in Bulgaria and claimed that there was a hotel in our city, I did not believe a bit, but I researched and it really turned out that way, he was quite rich and still offered me all sorts of nonsense and offered money. and I was kind of sick of being accepted as a highway, and I'm not like that, and neither is my behavior. Then his brother started writing to me, he is 23 and lives in my city and the same job, as if they had talked. So, I lost them, but I did not change my opinion about men as a whole.

Recently, another wanted to meet, lives in another country, but returns to Bulgaria on holidays, because they live in our city and was actually 27. In principle, the difference does not bother me, as long as the person is decent and I like. I really liked him, the meaning was close to what I like, and he taught at school, supposedly a teacher, no matter that he is 27, he has been teaching recently. He told me that you were looking for a girlfriend, I looked decent to him, he seemed to like me until the moment he wrote me some perverted things and I was shocked ... to tell you such a person, that one that looks so cute and not to your real years, another that he teaches for God, as if I had a relationship with my teacher. So, last night he told me that he broke up with his girlfriend a month ago and now he's coming for the holidays, he just wanted to kind of use me, not to be alone and so on. I was really terribly naughty, but I told myself that it wasn't worth roaring, etc. because of a man, especially since it wasn't happening for the first time, but maybe I thought that this time it might be different. So he told me that there was no time for a serious relationship if I wanted to use each other for two weeks and then things could happen ... Well, how will things happen, don't you have to know a person and like him, that then sleep with him. I just sometimes wonder if I live in the 18th century to think that way. I feel like I'm a terribly crazy person to want a normal relationship and a boy who doesn't use me. Apparently most want to be used to another person, have fun and then dump him. I can't complain that I don't get attention, I even wonder why they pay attention to me and deal with me, given my character and I'm not one of those light girls, I don't easily let anyone near me. I wouldn't say I'm ugly, I try to support myself, I won't go somewhere as a tramp, I don't think I'm stupid, but I just don't want to be used and I get really sick when some people start threatening me and being offer cheap numbers. I even want to get out of this city, not that the city is small, but I have the feeling that when I go out somewhere I will always see one of these people. You may be wondering why I wrote these things, I wanted to share them somewhere, I don't tell my friends because they will think of me as something that is easy to give, although they know me and will tell me what she does, I just got naughty and decided to write on the site, it's good that it's anonymous. There are probably others in such a situation and I guess I'm not the only one who wants a normal connection and not to be perceived as someone who came from the highway. And a question to the boys: what is more important for you - to have a relationship that is stable and to know that you can rely on the person next to you, or the most important thing in a person for you is the appearance and whether he would agree of some things? And to everyone who will read this: is it normal for you to have this approach from the boys, from the second chat or the first meeting to want to put the girl in bed? I really think I'm something abnormal and it's something normal that happens often. However, I know that we are in the 21st century and people have radically different understandings.