A Complicated Situation Between Friends From A Company

The Story

Hello. I am a 24 year old girl. The story is very long and complicated and I need a lot of advice. I live with my best friends, we get along great, or at least we got along until recently. I started dealing with one boy, it all started after a drunken night when we slept together. Then we continued to do it, but at one point I fell in love with him, and after a while he too. Everything was great, we behaved like a couple, but there was no way we could be together because our best friend has feelings for me and generally made us choose between friendship with him or our happiness. And of course we decided not to ruin our friendship, but we kept doing everything secretly. At one point, the boy I was working with started writing to his colleague, seeing each other, sleeping together, and he knows how much I love him and how I would do anything to be together. One night after going out I go home and see him at home with her. I freaked out, but did nothing, because he always tells me that I have no right to hold him accountable, etc., but I forgave him and continued to deal with him. 1 week later I found out they were asleep. I experienced it very hard, I cried, I got depressed, I wanted to break everything with him, but I couldn't. He kept saying that he loved me and that if we could be together he would go with me right away, but there was no way. The worst thing about the whole situation is that I see him every day and it's really hard for me to stop everything. Although he said how sorry he was that he slept with her, he continued to deal with her, to go out while I was waiting for him at home and not reflecting on anyone else. I only wanted him, but at one point the glass overflowed. We had gone out to a disco the whole company and on departure he agreed with her to go to another disco together and asked us all if we wanted to go with him and everyone refused, but I agreed, but he hinted to me not to go because I would be annoyed as I watch him dance with her, etc. I got very drunk and went with one of the boys, slept with him to do him a disservice. The next day I confessed to him and he was furious. He said that I was a whore and that he no longer wanted anything with me, after which he slept with her for 2 nights in a row. I feel really bad and I'm so sorry for what I did, I just wanted him to feel what I've been feeling for a few months now. I haven't stopped crying, drinking and blaming myself since then. I hated myself. The worst thing is that we see each other every day. I keep telling him that I'm sorry and that I love him, I try to hug him, kiss him, I humiliate myself a hell of a lot. I'm so dumb that I slept with the other boy, I turned into some kind of garbage.

Last Updated
August 20, 2020
Author:
babysophy

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